Talk:Makezh

Makezh

 * Nominated by: Cavalier One ( Squadron channel ) 07:45, 8 August 2008 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: Sponsored by the people who brought you beer milkshakes!

(5 Inqs/1 Users/6 Total)
Support
 * 1) This is excellent, Cavalier. DC 00:13, 15 August 2008 (UTC)
 * 2)  Jaina Solo ( Talk ) [[Image:Jainasolosig.gif |25px]] 13:15, 24 August 2008 (UTC)
 * 3) Caedus...  Chack Jadson  (Talk)  22:15, 25 September 2008 (UTC)
 * 4) I'm becoming rather cavalier about a certain DarkStryder takeover. *rimshot* Don't forget to tip your waiters and waitresses, ladies and gents; I'll be here all weekend.  Atarumaster88  [[Image:Jedi_Order.svg|20px]] ( Talk page ) 17:53, 5 October 2008 (UTC)
 * 5) Weird, weird character. Cull Tremayne 02:20, 12 October 2008 (UTC)
 * 6) --  Darth Culator  (Talk) 05:04, 12 October 2008 (UTC)

Oppose Comments
 * 1) From the Critique of Jadson:
 * 2) * "race of mysterious Force-wielding aliens from the Kathol Rift" This sentence in the body is the exact same as one in the intro. Please remedy.
 * 3) **Changed the second instance in the main body.
 * 4) *Great job, Cav. This is downright creepy though. Watch out for the Aing-Tii... Chack Jadson  (Talk) 01:04, 25 September 2008 (UTC)
 * 5) **Yep - those Aing-Tii are indirectly responsible for Darth Caedus too since they taught him to flow-walk. - Cavalier One ( Squadron channel ) 07:48, 25 September 2008 (UTC)
 * 6) From the desk of Atarumaster88
 * 7) * "but he was the best Rift navigator on the planet" POV.
 * 8) **Altered to "considered to be the best".
 * 9) * "d his first clear memory was of waking up in the presence of the Aing-Tii. He then entered a light transport, powered up the vessel," Can we have some context on where this was?
 * 10) **There's none given except that it was in the Kathol Rift. The Aing-Tii homeworld is in the Rift, but it could have just as easily been on one of their ships. It's never made clear.
 * 11) * "Danoor's scientific community made use of his talents" Could you be a little more specific?
 * 12) **Context added.
 * 13) * "Shortly after, he began to suffer from headaches." Shortly after his release or shortly after the government scientists met him?
 * 14) **Clarified.
 * 15) * "He agreed to their help, then realized the danger he was in. The FarStar crewmembers started a rescue attempt." Second sentence doesn't fit well there, and the whole thing is a bit awkward.
 * 16) **Removed the second sentence.
 * 17) * "After visiting the area with his father," Was his father there, or is he recalling earlier experiences?
 * 18) **Clarified.
 * 19) * "and an encounter with a ghest," A bit of context would be good.
 * 20) **Not much that I can give - the encounter is dealt with by the players, so the encounter can be resolved in several ways.
 * 21) * "emerged victorious due to the arrival of an Aing-Tii Sanhedrim ship" What exactly did the Aing-Tii vessel do?
 * 22) **Rewritten and clarified.
 * 23) * " he got credit for trying" It'd be nice if we knew who gave him this "credit for trying."
 * 24) **Context added.
 * 25) *Have a Super Terrific Friendly Un-frustrating day. Atarumaster88  [[Image:Jedi_Order.svg|20px]] ( Talk page ) 23:21, 3 October 2008 (UTC)
 * 26) **I'll certainly try to :) - Cavalier One ( Squadron channel ) 17:39, 5 October 2008 (UTC)


 * The main image sucks a bit, but it's the best I can do with my scanner for some reason. If anyone can grab another version of it, I'd be grateful. It's on page 70 of The Kathol Rift. - Cavalier One ( Squadron channel ) 07:45, 8 August 2008 (UTC)