Wookieepedia:Featured article nominations/Zygerrian/Legends (Redux review)

Zygerrian/Legends (redux review)

 * Redux comments: Article was Reduxed per INQ 96.
 * Date added: October 23, 2018
 * Changes since last review: diff

Imp

 * Duplicate linking.  Imperators II (Talk) 23:22, November 1, 2018 (UTC)
 * Fixed. QuiGonJinn  Senate seal.svg(Talk) 12:32, November 11, 2018 (UTC)
 * Some overly long sections should be split into subsections, and longish paragraphs should be split into several smaller ones.  Imperators II (Talk) 23:22, November 1, 2018 (UTC)
 * Done. QuiGonJinn  Senate seal.svg(Talk) 12:32, November 11, 2018 (UTC)
 * Formatting in "Development:" missing punctuation and spacing, Wizards.com articles should utilize quotes instead of italics.  Imperators II (Talk) 23:22, November 1, 2018 (UTC)
 * Fixed. QuiGonJinn  Senate seal.svg(Talk) 12:32, November 11, 2018 (UTC)

Toprawa

 * Some preliminaries:
 * You can pretty much just use Shortstory for reference 49. I don't think the featurettes are italicized, are they?
 * Adjusted. No, I don't think they should be. QuiGonJinn  Senate seal.svg(Talk) 13:08, February 22, 2019 (UTC)
 * Good, but notice the italics formatting in the title of all the TCW Blu-ray releases (found in their respective articles). Please format all instances as such in this article. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 22:38, February 22, 2019 (UTC)
 * It seems like Shortstory is hardcoded to display the entire book name in italics, no matter how you play around with the bformatted parameter. I wasn't able to format the title correctly using the template, so I had to get rid of it. I've adjusted some of the other titles in the sources list, as well. QuiGonJinn  Senate seal.svg(Talk) 10:57, February 23, 2019 (UTC)
 * The template has now been adjusted to accommodate this, and I've added it in. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 00:16, March 1, 2019 (UTC)
 * In reference 56, this isn't going to work: "Galaxy at War, The Complete Star Wars Encyclopedia and other sources spell the name of the species as 'Zygerrian.'" Either identify these "other sources" by name or reframe the reference note. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 05:53, February 22, 2019 (UTC)
 * Clarified. QuiGonJinn  Senate seal.svg(Talk) 13:08, February 22, 2019 (UTC)
 * In the Sources list...
 * CSWE needs to employ CSWECite for those entries
 * Used the appropriate instance of the CSWECite. QuiGonJinn  Senate seal.svg(Talk) 10:57, February 23, 2019 (UTC)
 * The CSWECite jang field is only to be used if the subject is mentioned in more than three individual entries without having an entry of its own. Before this change, you only had two entries listed. Can you confirm that Zygerrian is indeed mentioned in more than three entries? Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 21:37, February 27, 2019 (UTC)
 * I've found at least two other mentions: and .  QuiGonJinn  Senate seal.svg(Talk) 07:57, February 28, 2019 (UTC)
 * Perfect. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 00:16, March 1, 2019 (UTC)
 * The TCW Episode Guides need to be titled correctly
 * Formatted according to the title of the web page. QuiGonJinn  Senate seal.svg(Talk) 10:57, February 23, 2019 (UTC)
 * The Encyclopedia entry need to be formatted properly. "brezak" and "blixus" are not capitalized, for example. Go through and check all of them for accuracy. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 23:26, February 22, 2019 (UTC)
 * Only those two were lowercase. Adjusted accordingly. QuiGonJinn  Senate seal.svg(Talk) 10:57, February 23, 2019 (UTC)
 * Images:
 * This has some pretty poor cropping going on since the original uploader apparently couldn't hold the comic straight in their scanner bed. For example, you can see the borders and white space on the left and bottom, and some of the text is still visible in the speech bubble. But more concerning for me is that you can see how crooked it is, probably because it wasn't laying flat while being scanned. I would strongly suggest uploading a new version if possible. Even if it's not as high resolution because you're getting it from a pdf or something, I'd still prefer straightness over size.
 * This isn't digital. It's a physical scan from the ALTA TPB. A digital version will be sharper though not as large resolution, which is still preferable. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 21:46, March 2, 2019 (UTC)
 * Digital version uploaded. QuiGonJinn  Senate seal.svg(Talk) 14:32, March 3, 2019 (UTC)
 * What planet? The only planet introduced thus far in the article was Kowak in the preceding section. "As such, a slave market thrived on the planet."
 * Clarified. QuiGonJinn  Senate seal.svg(Talk) 12:22, March 3, 2019 (UTC)
 * Who considered them this? "...they were still considered an advanced civilization."
 * I see you're adapting this from the intro quote, so I've amended the sentence to satisfy this objection. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 23:49, March 2, 2019 (UTC)
 * You're going to need to show me where GG9 says the following, because I don't see it in the book:
 * "Zygerrian society centered around the Zygerrian Slavers Guild"
 * It looks like you could/should actually source this to Star Wars: The Clone Wars 2, judging from the "Early history" quote, unless there's a more direct reference somewhere. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 23:34, March 2, 2019 (UTC)
 * Reworded. That was perhaps my own extrapolation based on the available info. No source states that outright, and the quote from The Clone Wars 2 must refer to the "Slave Empire," per evidence that I've now found in Friends Like These. See the response below. QuiGonJinn  Senate seal.svg(Talk) 18:02, March 5, 2019 (UTC)
 * "Founded centuries before the Clone Wars" -- In fact, GG9 actually says the formerly secret Guild went public shortly after the Empire legalized slavery
 * Turns out, Friends Like These actually establishes the chronology and the relation between the Slave Empire and the Slavers Guild; a detail which I admittedly overlooked. Made adjustments according to that info and worked in the GG9 details. QuiGonJinn  Senate seal.svg(Talk) 18:02, March 5, 2019 (UTC)
 * Have you used the exact punctuation from the Blu-rays for the TCW quotes?
 * Is it "Royal archivist" or "royal archivist"? The article isn't consistent. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 23:31, March 2, 2019 (UTC)
 * It's lowercase. Fixed. QuiGonJinn  Senate seal.svg(Talk) 18:02, March 5, 2019 (UTC)
 * I want to confirm that all of this can actually be sourced to that episode: "...and the Zygerrians were feared in spaceports across the galaxy, earning fame for their history of violence, piracy, slavery, and war." Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 23:49, March 2, 2019 (UTC)
 * This comes from Galaxy at War. Moved the ref note accordingly. QuiGonJinn  Senate seal.svg(Talk) 12:22, March 3, 2019 (UTC)
 * Do the "Kidnapped" Blu-ray captions actually capitalize "Slaver Empire" in the "Allies of the Confederacy" quote (this goes back to the previous objection)? If so, I would suggest capitalizing all uses of that term in the article.
 * Is the "Scientel's auction" quote supposed to say rich?
 * Yes, it is. Fixed. QuiGonJinn  Senate seal.svg(Talk) 12:22, March 3, 2019 (UTC)
 * I feel like the article should introduce Molec here by his title; namely, he's the Zygerrian prime minister and Captain of the Guard. "The Queen's unwillingness to kill the Jedi prompted her aide Atai Molec to invite Dooku to Zygerria..."
 * The article is inconsistent on whether it's "Royal guard" or "Royal Guard"
 * Friends Like These, which is the most recent source, spells it fully lowercase. Adjusted accordingly. QuiGonJinn  Senate seal.svg(Talk) 18:02, March 5, 2019 (UTC)
 * I don't have immediate access to Insider 89 to see what it says, but why do you write "essentially" here? I ask because GG9 says that this Decree does legalize slavery under certain conditions, not essentially. "...after the Imperial Decree A-SL-4557.607.232 essentially legalized slavery under certain conditions"
 * Insider 89 refers to a "qualified legalization of slavery under Decree...". I've removed the word "essentially." QuiGonJinn  Senate seal.svg(Talk) 18:02, March 5, 2019 (UTC)
 * Who considered them this? If the source doesn't literally use the term "considered," just say the statement outright: "...the Zygerrians were again considered the most infamous slave traders in the entire galaxy." Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 01:13, March 3, 2019 (UTC)
 * The source is a POV report, so I've adjusted this accordingly. QuiGonJinn  Senate seal.svg(Talk) 18:02, March 5, 2019 (UTC)
 * This sentence doesn't make sense. It's saying Nilo died twice, once during his first fight and then was killed by the droid. "However, Nilo did not survive his first fight and was killed by the prototype battle droid L8-L9 shortly thereafter."
 * Reworded. QuiGonJinn  Senate seal.svg(Talk) 12:22, March 3, 2019 (UTC)
 * I just want to confirm the punctuation in the Medica section, specifically that M'rch's line is all one sentence and the space after the ellipsis.
 * M'rch's line is split between two panels, with the speech bubble on the first panel ending with the ellipsis, and the other bubble also beginning with an ellipsis. I believe this makes it all one line. Removed the space after the ellipsis, though. QuiGonJinn  Senate seal.svg(Talk) 18:13, March 5, 2019 (UTC)
 * This is typically a phrase that needs secondary referencing, as it's not usually stated outright. I'm guessing the TCW episode doesn't say this? "Zygerrians were also seen on the galactic capital of Coruscant." Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 01:44, March 3, 2019 (UTC)
 * The article is inconsistent on whether it's Thanda Clan or Thanda clan
 * Fixed. QuiGonJinn  Senate seal.svg(Talk) 18:02, March 5, 2019 (UTC)
 * Reviewing note: I ended up just removing the "Friends date" reference, which I found unnecessary. Articles could use general date ranges like that for virtually anything, and readers can just understand simply that these events took place during the time of the Rebel Alliance. If they really want to see the years for the Rebellion's existence, which kind of become superfluous for this article's purposes, they can explore that article.
 * Noted. QuiGonJinn  Senate seal.svg(Talk) 12:22, March 3, 2019 (UTC)
 * What is this unformatted dash in the Hextrophon section? Does it need mdash? Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 03:01, March 3, 2019 (UTC)
 * It does. Fixed. QuiGonJinn  Senate seal.svg(Talk) 12:22, March 3, 2019 (UTC)
 * I'm sorry to have to lay this burden on you, but it's always been a mistake on Wookieepedia's part to not have a general article for the overall Star Wars: The Clone Wars multimedia project. Much like we have an article for the Clone Wars multimedia project, Star Wars: Shadows of the Empire, and Star Wars: The Force Unleashed, TCW should also have one to cover all of its multimedia works in one place, since that information is simply too massive to be documented in the TV series article alone. I have therefore created a redlink for this in the BTS, which you will need to fill in. It's up to you how much effort you want to put into creating it, of course, as a simple stub satisfies this objection. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 06:04, March 3, 2019 (UTC)
 * None of this can really be sourced to the three episodes as is currently being done: "George Lucas, the creator of the Star Wars franchise, liked Gilroy's comic story enough to request that it be adapted as future episodes of the show. In 2011–2012, the Slaves of the Republic comics were adapted into three episodes of the television series, titled "Kidnapped," "Slaves of the Republic," and "Escape from Kadavo." Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 06:33, March 3, 2019 (UTC)
 * Sourced to the Complete Season Four feature, which states this. QuiGonJinn  Senate seal.svg(Talk) 12:22, March 3, 2019 (UTC)
 * What "sources" are these? This paragraph only cites the information to a single source. "According to sources published prior to the species' redesign..." Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 07:30, March 3, 2019 (UTC)
 * Infobox-exclusives:
 * Light skin
 * Black hair
 * Yellow and blue eyes. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 07:51, March 3, 2019 (UTC)