Wookieepedia:Good article nominations

 This page is for the nomination of good articles. This is not a way to showcase the articles of your favorite characters, spaceships, or the like. For a list of Good articles, see Category:Wookieepedia good articles.

A Good article is an article that adheres to quality standards, but cannot reach FA status due to its limited content.


 * Good article nominations history
 * Good article checklist
 * Good article nomination rules

READ THIS FIRST!

An article must&hellip;


 * 1) &hellip;be well-written and detailed.
 * 2) &hellip;be unbiased, non-point of view.
 * 3) &hellip;be sourced with all available sources and appearances.
 * 4) &hellip;follow the Manual of Style, Layout Guide, and all other policies on Wookieepedia.
 * 5) &hellip;following the review process, be stable, i.e., does not change significantly from day to day and is not the subject of ongoing edit wars. This does not apply to vandalism and protection or semi-protection as a result of vandalism.
 * 6) &hellip;not be tagged with any sort of improvement tags (i.e. more sources, expand, etc).
 * 7) &hellip;have a proper lead that gives a good summary of the topic if the length of the article supports it. This is essential in articles over 1000 words but may not be appropriate on articles with limited content.
 * 8) &hellip;have no more than 3 redlinks for articles less than 500 words, no more than 5 redlinks for articles 500 words or more, and no redlinks in the introduction, infobox, or any templates.
 * 9) &hellip;have significant information, especially a biography for character articles. For articles under 1000 words in length, comprehensive detail is required with all information covered from all sources and appearances. For articles over 1000 words, broad coverage addressing all major aspects of the topic is sufficient.
 * 10) &hellip;be completely referenced for all available material and sources. See Sourcing for more information.
 * 11) &hellip;have all quotes and images sourced.
 * 12) &hellip;provide at least one quote on the article if available. A leading quote at the beginning of the article would be preferred, though not required if no quotes are available. Although quotes may be placed in the body of the article, a maximum of one quote is allowed at the beginning of each section.
 * 13) &hellip;ideally include a "personality and traits" section on all character articles if information is available.
 * 14) &hellip;ideally include a "powers and abilities" section on relevant character articles, especially for Force-sensitive characters where said powers and/or abilities are stipulated.
 * 15) &hellip;include a "Behind the scenes" section.
 * 16) &hellip;include a reasonable number of images of sufficient quality to illustrate the article, if said images are available.
 * 17) &hellip;counting the introduction and "Behind the scenes" material, be at least 250 words long (not including captions, quotes, or headers, etc). Alternatively, a comprehensive article cannot exceed 3000 words.

How to nominate:


 * 1) First, nominate an article you find is worthy of good status, putting it at the bottom of the list below. Nominated articles must meet all seventeen requirements stated above.
 * 2) Add GAnom at the top of the article you are nominating.
 * 3) Be sure to place sign in the "Nominated by" line when the nomination is posted for voting.
 * 4) Others will object to the nomination if they disagree that the article is good enough; they will then supply reasons for doing so, and ways to improve the article (errors, style, organization, images, notability, sources).
 * 5) Supporters adjust the article until the objectors (with reasonable objections) are satisfied.
 * 6) Per AgriCorps consensus, nominators are restricted to four nominations on the GAN page at any one time. Once one nomination is removed from the page as either successful or unsuccessful, another can be added.

How to vote:


 * 1) Before doing anything, be sure to read the article completely, keeping a sharp eye out for mistakes.
 * 2) Afterward, compare the article to the criteria listed above, and then either support or object the article's nomination.
 * 3) *If you object, please supply concrete reasons for doing so, and how it can be improved.
 * 4) As stated above, any objections will be looked upon by the nominator, supporters, and anyone willing to improve the article, and action will be taken to please the objectors. Do not strike other users' objections; it is up to the objector to review the changes and strike if they are satisfied.
 * 5) Once a nomination has a total of five votes, with at least three votes coming from AgriCorps or Inquisitorius members&mdash;two of which must be AgriCorps votes&mdash;after at least a week since it was nominated (beginning the day of its nomination) and no objections (or the objections have been stricken or overridden), the article will be considered a "Good article" and tagged with the template. The talk page will also be tagged with the GA template. Alternatively, if a nomination receives a total of five AgriCorps votes with no outstanding objections before one week has passed, the nomination will be considered successful.
 * 6) The article is placed on the Good article list.

All nominations will be considered idle and are subject to removal by AgriCorps vote if objections are not addressed after a period of 2 weeks.

Good article nominations
To nominate an article for Good article status, list it here. Nominated articles must meet all seventeen requirements stated above. If an article has a total of five votes, with at least three votes coming from AgriCorps or Inquisitorius members&mdash;one of which must be an AgriCorps vote&mdash;after at least a week since it was nominated (beginning the day of its nomination) and no objections (or the objections have been stricken or overridden), the article will be considered a "Good article" and tagged with the template. The talk page will also be tagged with the GA template. For complete instructions on archiving nominations please see here. Also remember to add GAnom at the top of the article you are nominating.

Lock (Eeth Koth)

 * Nominated by:  Clone Commander Lee  Talk 10:25, May 2, 2010 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: A clone each day keeps the doctor away. One TCW GAN should be on this page

(0 ACs/3 Users/3 Total)
Support
 * 1) Good work, Lee. -- 1358  (Talk) 15:03, May 2, 2010 (UTC)
 * 2) Well done. I'd like to see more noms of this quality, Lee. SoresuMakashi ( Everything I tell you is a lie  the truth  ) 06:25, May 6, 2010 (UTC)
 * 3) A Christian 23:52, May 18, 2010 (UTC)

Object Comments
 * 1) Airdate for Grievous Intrigue? --  1358  (Talk) 10:59, May 2, 2010 (UTC)
 * 2) *Added.  Clone Commander Lee  Talk 11:04, May 2, 2010 (UTC)
 * 3) *Just to let you know, this is not a valid objection. It is completely up to the writer whether or not to put things like the airdates or release dates of sources in articles. The only time the realease/airdate would be needed is for articles about the source itself. Jonjedigrandmaster  Jedi symbol.svg ( We seed the stars ) 14:47, May 2, 2010 (UTC)
 * 4) Fett
 * 5) * In the intro, you say the the Confederate forces were led by Grievous's Separatist destroyer. Reading this sentence, it sounds like the actual destroyer was leading them. Can you clarify that Grievous was leading the troops, onboard the destroyer?
 * 6) **Fixed.
 * 7) * Is there a way that you can reword this sentence in the bio: "Koth's Venator-class Star Destroyer, with Lock on board, was attacked by..."' It's very similiar to the sentence in the intro.
 * 8) **Changed.
 * 9) ***Removing Lock and changing Venator-class Star Destroyer to just Venator doesn't work. Please reword the sentence.
 * 10) ****Eh we only know he served on the Destroyer under Koth. It's correct.
 * 11) *****Please reword the sentence. It's currently the same as the intro's, only it has a few words missing.
 * 12) ******Ah now. Reworded.  Clone Commander Lee  Talk 07:52, May 8, 2010 (UTC)
 * 13) * "Lock and his troops prepared defensive positions at one of the ship's airlocks in order to repel the enemy forces"" How did they know that the super battle droids were about to enter their ship? It sounds like they knew unexpectedly without someone telling them, and then in the next sentence, the supers attacked.
 * 14) **Better ?
 * 15) ***"Lock and his troops prepared defensive positions at one of the ship's airlocks and shortly after this, B2 super battle droids used an armored docking tube to board the cruiser and poured into the Republic vessel." How did Lock and his men know that the supers were about to board the Star Destroyer? Also, please check your grammar in this sentence.
 * 16) ****We don't know how the knew it.
 * 17) *****You can mention that the Separatist ship was preparing to board Koth's Star Destroyer, and that set up Lock to initiate their defensive positions. You even mentioned they tried to stop the droids from boarding the ship in the P&T, too.
 * 18) ******Fixed.  Clone Commander Lee  Talk 17:08, May 9, 2010 (UTC)
 * 19) *******"After a short exchange of broadside fire, Grievous's destroyer forced Koth's warship into submission, intending to board the Republic vessel." So the destroyer wanted to board the Republic vessel?
 * 20) ********Better ?  Clone Commander Lee  Talk 15:06, May 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 21) *********Better, but specifically how did Lock and his men know the battle droids were about to board their Star Destroyer? Were they warned? Did they look out a window in the Destroyer?
 * 22) **********No idea.  Clone Commander Lee  Talk 15:17, May 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 23) ***********Then, please establish a better transition between these two sentences: "The Separatist troops onboard Grievous' destroyer intended to board the Republic vessel. Lock and his troops had prepared defensive positions at one of the ship's airlocks and, shortly after this, B2 super battle droids used an armored docking tube to board the cruiser and poured into the Republic cruiser." It's rather confusing, as it's rather awkwardly phrased, since they apparently knew the droids were about to board their vessel, without warning or consent.
 * 24) ************Fixed.  Clone Commander Lee  Talk 15:31, May 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 25) * "Although he and his troops did their best," This is too POV orientated.
 * 26) **Fixed.
 * 27) ***"Although he and his troops did tried to" Try to what?
 * 28) ****Bah.
 * 29) *I'll give it another look after this.  JangFett  (Talk) 18:09, May 6, 2010 (UTC)
 * 30) **Thank you.  Clone Commander Lee  Talk 11:38, May 7, 2010 (UTC)

Gormak

 * Nominated by: &mdash;fodigg  BlackRebelStarbird.png (talk) | 02:46, May 5, 2010 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: My first species nom. Looking forward to addressing your objections. Thanks in advance for your reviews!
 * I have just finished updating the article from the new information given in the Creating Worlds developer blog. There was less in it about the Gormak than I had thought. Please let me know if I missed anything. &mdash;fodigg  BlackRebelStarbird.png (talk) | 18:01, May 14, 2010 (UTC)

(3 ACs/6 Users/9 Total)
Support
 * 1) Good job. --Imperialles 13:01, May 5, 2010 (UTC)
 * 2) Good to see project progress. Darth Trayus ( Trayus Academy ) 22:48, May 5, 2010 (UTC)
 * 3) Looks good. --Eyrezer 08:48, May 12, 2010 (UTC)
 * 4) Jedi Kasra (comlink) 01:59, May 14, 2010 (UTC)
 * 5) Good to see project progress. --Skippy Farlstendoiro 14:21, May 17, 2010 (UTC)
 * 6) Hopefully a sign of more TOR aliens to come. ~ SavageBob 14:49, May 18, 2010 (UTC)
 * 7) Good to see project progress. :P -- 1358  (Talk) 18:44, May 18, 2010 (UTC)
 * 8)  IFYLOFD  ( Floyd's crib ) 01:23, May 20, 2010 (UTC)
 * 9)  Jonjedigrandmaster  ( Talk ) 02:23, May 20, 2010 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) Few things:
 * 2) * Gormak in the galaxy: "For this reason, Gormak are generally considered to be mysterious." First of all, wrong tense. Secondly, considered mysterious by who? Clarify, or it could come off as a little POV.
 * 3) **Source text: A MYSTERIOUS SPECIES ON A MYSTERIOUS WORLD, LITTLE IS KNOWN IN THE GREATER GALAXY ABOUT THE GORMAK (sorry about caps, that's what it came in). I changed the article text to: For this reason, Gormak were considered to be mysterious to off-worlders. This fixes the tense issue and clarifies who holds the opinion without adding another use of "the galaxy". &mdash;fodigg  BlackRebelStarbird.png (talk) | 12:57, May 5, 2010 (UTC)
 * 4) * Gormak in the galaxy: "As the Gormak began constructing space-craft based on scavenged and stolen technology, it is possible that they expanded to planets other than Voss at a later time." Speculation.
 * 5) **Removed. Seemed obvious enough to include it, but then again if it's so obvious it does not need to be included. Also fixed the sourcing tags since that source only appears once after edit. &mdash;fodigg  BlackRebelStarbird.png (talk) | 12:57, May 5, 2010 (UTC)
 * 6) * Image captions: Remember to use periods when writing full sentences.
 * 7) **Darn, thought I had that covered. Made some changes to throw verbs in the captions, making it more obvious they were sentences and safer to add periods all around. Should be fixed. &mdash;fodigg  BlackRebelStarbird.png (talk) | 12:57, May 5, 2010 (UTC)
 * 8) * Wikipedia links: No hard rules on this, and this is not a proper objection, but it might not be a bad idea to cut down on these a bit. In the intro, flight could link to starship instead of being an interwiki link.
 * 9) **I originally had that but was concerned that they might not have atmospheric flight too. Did a double link to airspeeders and spacecraft there. Also removed some of the obvious links in the description: hair, fur, nose, claw. No reason why those should be linked when terms like "face" and "eyes" aren't. &mdash;fodigg  BlackRebelStarbird.png (talk) | 12:57, May 5, 2010 (UTC)
 * 10) *Other than that, nice work. Just keep in mind that this article's going to need a ton of care in the months leading up to the release of TOR, and then likely a huge update once it's out. --Imperialles 05:14, May 5, 2010 (UTC)
 * 11) **Thanks! And thanks for the review! I'm aware that many articles in the project are going to need big work when the game is released, but I'm happy to do that. &mdash;fodigg  BlackRebelStarbird.png (talk) | 12:57, May 5, 2010 (UTC)
 * 12) Trayus Academy:
 * 13) * I would change the main quote source to the actual HoloNet article instead of ours, so as to be more specific as to where in the HoloNet it came from.
 * 14) **Done! &mdash;fodigg  BlackRebelStarbird.png (talk) | 12:57, May 5, 2010 (UTC)
 * 15) **Err, not done. My edit didn't actually work as it required an in-house article. Changed back. If you know a way to get a more accurate link without creating an article for each section of the holonet or entry in the holonet, please let me know. &mdash;fodigg  BlackRebelStarbird.png (talk) | 13:45, May 5, 2010 (UTC)
 * 16) ***I've taken care of it for you. Give it a look so you can see how to do Quoteurl's in the future.
 * 17) **** Okay, that makes sense, but where is the [src] link? Does the "quoteurl" template not give a link for the source? &mdash;fodigg  BlackRebelStarbird.png (talk) | 00:57, May 6, 2010 (UTC)
 * 18) ****Nm. I looked up the template and you were just missing the "url=" portion. Added, and thanks for pointing the template out. &mdash;fodigg  BlackRebelStarbird.png (talk) | 01:00, May 6, 2010 (UTC)
 * 19) * Slightly reduce some of the details on the Imperial/Republic invasion in the intro. One sentence should do it. It's specifics are somewhat unimportant to the Gormak.
 * 20) **I cut out some details of the Voss and I inserted the Gormak into another clause to make it more relevant to them: When the planet Voss was first discovered not long after the Treaty of Coruscant in 3,653 BBY, the Sith Empire attempted to conquer the planet, which it thought was only populated by Gormak. The Voss revealed themselves and the planet remained independent. Embassies were established by the Empire and the Galactic Republic in an attempt to curry favor with the Voss, angering the Gormak. &mdash;fodigg  BlackRebelStarbird.png (talk) | 12:57, May 5, 2010 (UTC)
 * 21) ***Good. I made a slight alteration, but feel free to undo it if you don't like it.
 * 22) * "The Gormak were extremely hostile toward the other natives of the planet Voss, the Voss." - Although I understand what's being said here, others who have not read the original source may be a bit confused if you name the Voss without providing a better distinction between their name and the planet's.
 * 23) **I altered the text in that sentence to: toward the other natives of the planet, the Voss species. &mdash;fodigg  BlackRebelStarbird.png (talk) | 12:57, May 5, 2010 (UTC)
 * 24) ***Perfect
 * 25) * The final sentence of "Gormak in the galaxy" is speculation at this point.
 * 26) **Removed, as per Imp's objection. &mdash;fodigg  BlackRebelStarbird.png (talk) | 12:57, May 5, 2010 (UTC)
 * 27) *Other than that and Imp's objections, it looks pretty good. Like he said, it'll require a lot of updating, but it seems GA-worthy as it stands. And I'm glad you're taking on projects that you know will need updates, as it's best to get a head-start on them now instead of starting from scratch when a litany of information is released. Darth Trayus ( Trayus Academy ) 05:48, May 5, 2010 (UTC)
 * 28) **I'm aware that there's going to be updates and eventually a big flood of new information once the game is released. I'm up for that as long as it's not expected for all articles all at once. :) As you said, the more that's done now, the easier it will be later. Thanks for the review! &mdash;fodigg  BlackRebelStarbird.png (talk) | 12:57, May 5, 2010 (UTC)
 * 29) IFYLOFD:
 * 30) *"the planet Voss, which resided in the Voss system of the Allied Tion sector in the Outer Rim Territories." Better word choice could be used here; the verb "to reside" is usually used in regards to a person.
 * 31) **Somebody beat me to the punch in a copy-edit, and the word "reside" no longer appears. &mdash;fodigg  BlackRebelStarbird.png (talk) |
 * 32) * "Original Gormak technology was visually unique and fundamentally different from common technology of the galaxy." How so?
 * 33) **I've removed this text as it was taken from an OoU perspective when they were describing art design. &mdash;fodigg  BlackRebelStarbird.png (talk) |
 * 34) * "The Gormak possessed an impressive innate comprehension for technology, though they had not developed flight capability prior to contact with off-worlders." Which type of flight? Sub-atmospheric flight or space flight? Clarify.
 * 35) **Can't. Just says flight. Originally linked to flight and was told to instead link to starship in a previous objection. I compromised by including both links. I've just altered the link to flight, which includes the following sentence: The term "flight" also referred to the general concept of flying, be it in a starfighter, an airspeeder, or by utilizing a personal jetpack. Best I can do. &mdash;fodigg  BlackRebelStarbird.png (talk) |
 * 36) **I altered the text of the flight article to say: "Flight" also referred to flight-related technology—such as starships, airspeeders, or jetpacks—or to the general concept of flight—such as piloting or with natural wings as Geonosians and Toydarians., which I think provides a better picture and makes the article more serviceable to link to for this purpose. &mdash;fodigg  BlackRebelStarbird.png (talk) | 14:06, May 17, 2010 (UTC)
 * 37) *That's all.  IFYLOFD  ( Floyd's crib ) 02:35, May 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 38) **Thanks for the review! I appreciate it! &mdash;fodigg  BlackRebelStarbird.png (talk) | 22:31, May 16, 2010 (UTC)
 * 39) Prepare to be savaged...
 * 40) * "an impressive innate comprehension..." Impressive is slightly POV here. Can you say who found it impressive?
 * 41) **Author did apparently. Struck the word "impressive". &mdash;fodigg  BlackRebelStarbird.png (talk) |
 * 42) * Again, please reword the "discovery" of Voss, since its native species discovered it first. :)
 * 43) **Changed to: When the planet Voss was discovered by non-natives &mdash;fodigg  BlackRebelStarbird.png (talk) |
 * 44) * Again, please provide context for the Treaty of Coruscant.
 * 45) **Context added: ended the great galactic war and marked the beginning of the cold war. &mdash;fodigg  BlackRebelStarbird.png (talk) |
 * 46) * "hairless, furless..." I'd say both words are not necessary; hair and fur mean virtually the same thing.
 * 47) **I disagree. Would you describe a Human, Zabrak, or Falleen as "furry"? Would you describe a Wookiee as "hairy"? this guy is hairy, but he's not fur-covered like a dog. However, I dug around some other species articles who could be described similarly for precedent and none of the hairless, furless species in FA status mentioned the lack of either, so I've struck both words from the sentence. &mdash;fodigg  BlackRebelStarbird.png (talk) |
 * 48) *** Biologically, they're the same thing, though. See here. It's just colloquial to call a lot of hair "fur". I'd suggest putting it back if the OS mentions their lack of body hair/fur. ~ SavageBob 00:52, May 18, 2010 (UTC)
 * 49) ****It doesn't though. I'm pretty sure I was trying to bulk up the paragraph. &mdash;fodigg  BlackRebelStarbird.png (talk) | 13:40, May 18, 2010 (UTC)
 * 50) *That's it. Please keep up the aliens! ~ SavageBob 05:52, May 16, 2010 (UTC)
 * 51) **Thanks for the review, much appreciated! &mdash;fodigg  BlackRebelStarbird.png (talk) | 22:31, May 16, 2010 (UTC)
 * 52) Two small things: Voss' (planet) context is in the History section, but it is mentioned before that. Please move the context to the first mention. | The Holonet is not a website, but a web feature. Other than that, good work. --  1358  (Talk) 18:34, May 18, 2010 (UTC)
 * 53) *Context moved and wording altered, thanks for your review! &mdash;fodigg  BlackRebelStarbird.png (talk) | 18:39, May 18, 2010 (UTC)
 * 54) The Grand Master
 * 55) * Do "flight capability" (in the intro) and "pre-flight technology" (in the History section) refer to any type of flight, i.e. even things like speeders, or just space flight?
 * 56) **As stated in similar previous objections, it is not specified. I wish I could clarify it more. &mdash;fodigg  BlackRebelStarbird.png (talk) |
 * 57) ***Sorry, I missed that :P Jonjedigrandmaster  ( Talk ) 02:23, May 20, 2010 (UTC)
 * 58) * "They were by far the dominant sentient population on the planet, although they actively avoided the forest known as The Nightmare Lands." Unless you say why they avoided that forest, this is a confusing non sequitur.
 * 59) **Split into two sentences and offered the forest's "mysterious corruptive influence" as the why. &mdash;fodigg  BlackRebelStarbird.png (talk) |
 * 60) * "partially due to its sleek aesthetic" Unless I'm reading this wrong, I'm not sure that "aesthetic" is the right word here.
 * 61) **Oh for crying. That shouldn't be there. I thought I'd removed that as it was OoU discussion about visuals in-game. Removed that whole sentence and did some sourcing cleanup while I was at it. &mdash;fodigg  BlackRebelStarbird.png (talk) |
 * 62) * "Embassies to the Voss were established in Voss-Ka for both the Empire and the Republic, providing additional motivation for Gormak hostility toward the offworlders." Why did this provide additional motivation for Gormak hostility? Also, you haven't yet stated that they were hostile toward the off-worlders at all; you can't state that this is additional motivation until you've provided some initial motivation.
 * 63) **Cleaned up so that it says it angered the gormak who were already hostile toward the offworlders to begin with. &mdash;fodigg  BlackRebelStarbird.png (talk) |
 * 64) * You use both "offworlders" and "off-worlders" throughout the article. Please stick with one or the other, for sake of consistency.
 * 65) **Added hyphen where missing. &mdash;fodigg  BlackRebelStarbird.png (talk) |
 * 66) * I don't think the "Gormak in the Galaxy" section is really necessary. Typically, "Species in the Galaxy" sections are used to give some examples of the impact of certain members of the species on the galaxy: for an example, check out that section in some other species GAs, like Mikoan or Covallon. I think the information you have right now could easily be merged into the rest of the article body.
 * 67) **struck the section and moved the image to Bts section. &mdash;fodigg  BlackRebelStarbird.png (talk) |
 * 68) *Keep up the good work. Jonjedigrandmaster  ( Talk ) 00:11, May 20, 2010 (UTC)
 * 69) **Thanks for the review! &mdash;fodigg  BlackRebelStarbird.png (talk) | 01:24, May 20, 2010 (UTC)

Comments
 * Not an objection, but it's generally best practice to put a full-body image in the infobox whenever possible. I noticed there was one such image on the Voss (species) page; might that be used in the infobox? It's possible it won't be good enough quality once it's cropped, but I figured I'd ask. ~ SavageBob 20:05, May 7, 2010 (UTC)
 * Sorry, this is the image I'm talking about, and it seems that it would work in the infobox just fine (except for the right-orientation, but you can't win 'em all!). ~ SavageBob 20:06, May 7, 2010 (UTC)
 * Sounds good to me. I'll just swap those images so that there's no double images between the Gormak and Voss (species) articles. Thanks! &mdash;fodigg  BlackRebelStarbird.png (talk) | 20:12, May 7, 2010 (UTC)

Pzob

 * Nominated by: Imperialles 16:25, May 5, 2010 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: Warming up for Gamorr.

(0 ACs/4 Users/4 Total)
Support
 * 1) I fixed two instances of "eachother"; there is a space between the two words. Nice and clean otherwise.  NAYAYEN : TALK 12:52, May 7, 2010 (UTC)
 * 2) Just added links to the new locations in the body, hope you don't mind. I'm anxious to read Gamorr! --Skippy Farlstendoiro 06:52, May 18, 2010 (UTC)
 * 3) SoresuMakashi ( Everything I tell you is a lie  the truth  ) 11:21, May 18, 2010 (UTC)
 * 4) -- 1358  (Talk) 18:42, May 18, 2010 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) Soresu
 * 2) * Probably best to specify which species the atmosphere was breathable to. Otherwise, it could mean Kel Dor breathable. SoresuMakashi ( Everything I tell you is a lie  the truth  ) 12:01, May 17, 2010 (UTC)
 * 3) **Done. --Imperialles 14:08, May 17, 2010 (UTC)
 * 4) Skippy: Oink (Per Moff Ball Four)
 * 5) * Intro: You can give the name of "the sole surviving Imperial soldier", and even link it.
 * 6) * Description: "Apart from the presence of a Galactic Empire base during the Imperial Period,[4] no major galactic power lay claim to Pzob" You said it was a secret base, thus I don't think the Empire really laid claim to Pzob which is more or less public. Maybe you could reword this?
 * 7) * History: I know you won't have all the information, with all those "prior to", but are you sure the events are chronologically ordered? Gamorrean settlement before 18 BBY; Republic discovering the word between 5,000-3,000 BY; last official report before 38 BBY. The settlement sounds more probable after the Republic discovers the planet.
 * 8) * Why did the Gamorreans began attacks against the Imperial base? If it was for no apparent reason, that would be worth mentioning.
 * 9) * History, 4th paragraph: Please tell the end of the story. The Eye probably left Pzob with its prisoners, bound for somewhere. Specify that; as far as we know, the Eye is still in Pzob!
 * 10) * You're gonna be asked to create a link for the Imperial base, and at least write a stub.
 * 11) * Also, link Pzob Forest Battle Yard.
 * 12) * Suggestion: If The Essential Atlas Online Companion lists a "Pzob system" instead of the K749 system, then the K749 system is also known as Pzob system (Similar to J11.9 / Tatoo system; LM0228 / Lamaro system).
 * 13) *Skippy Farlstendoiro 14:20, May 17, 2010 (UTC)
 * 14) **Most of these should be addressed, take a look. As for the Atlas thing, sure, that makes sense, but I'm not comfortable with assumptions. --Imperialles 14:42, May 17, 2010 (UTC)

Comments

Hardcase

 * Nominated by:  JangFett  (Talk) 02:33, May 8, 2010 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: Continuation of The Deserter clone troopers

(0 ACs/2 Users/2 Total)
Support
 * 1) Objections addressed via IRC. SoresuMakashi ( Everything I tell you is a lie  the truth  ) 03:06, May 8, 2010 (UTC)
 * 2)  Clone Commander Lee  Talk 17:17, May 9, 2010 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) Lee attacks
 * 2) * the Republic group spotted a crashed ship: Smuggler, Cis, Republic ?
 * 3) **Addressed
 * 4) * while he, Cody, and Crys stayed behind to go through the remains of the crashed ship: I don't thinks that only Cody, Crys and Kenobi stayed behind.
 * 5) **They did; they stayed behind to salvage the remains of the ship to find clues. They weren't part of Rex's team, too.
 * 6) ***I mean that not only Cody, Crys and Kenobi stayed behind.  Clone Commander Lee  Talk 16:59, May 9, 2010 (UTC)
 * 7) ****Lee, in the episode Obi-Wan, Cody, and Crys were the only ones that stayed behind. I've said this before.
 * 8) *****Eh, no. There were a lot of troopers with Kenobi and Cody.  Clone Commander Lee  Talk 17:11, May 9, 2010 (UTC)
 * 9) ******Again, I have no reason to change this, Lee. In the episode, those were the only ones mentioned that stayed behind. Anything else would be redundant, and not even worth mentioning. This article is about Hardcase, not the episode summary in general nor "Kenobi's group that stayed behind."
 * 10) *******Well it is not precise, but OK.
 * 11) * The last paragraph is a little bit to much about Jesse.
 * 12) **Reworded a few things. Hardcase was with Jesse during that time.
 * 13) *That's all from me. Nice to see more TCW (and especially) clones from you.  Clone Commander Lee  Talk 07:47, May 8, 2010 (UTC)

Comments

Battle droid commander (Dorin)

 * Nominated by: Kreivi Wolter 01:25, May 9, 2010 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: Roger Roger.

(0 ACs/0 Users/0 Total)
Support

Object
 * 1) In the Characteristics section, you say "The droid's actions were devastating enough to please Grievous, who was known to greatly dislike the droids under his command." However, in the second clause, you need to identify where Grievous showed this, and source it. Also, can you find a different word to replace "devastating"? It doesn't work there.  JangFett  (Talk) 03:08, May 9, 2010 (UTC)
 * 2) *Meh, the whole paragraph was little... weird. Removed. Kreivi Wolter 09:03, May 9, 2010 (UTC)
 * 3) I'm seeing major issues with poor wording/phrasing and overall coherency in the article's writing, some POV issues, and also major sourcing mistakes. Jonjedigrandmaster  Jedi symbol.svg ( We seed the stars ) 04:45, May 9, 2010 (UTC)
 * 4) *Could you glarify what you mean by major sourcing mistakes? Kreivi Wolter 09:03, May 9, 2010 (UTC)
 * 5) **I mean that the article does not adhere to rules 4 and 10, in that it is inadequately sourced. Jonjedigrandmaster  Jedi symbol.svg ( We seed the stars ) 13:18, May 9, 2010 (UTC)
 * 6) Two things
 * 7) * "During the ongoing battle..." During already indicates that the battle is ongoing; no need for both.
 * 8) **Right. Kreivi Wolter 19:39, May 16, 2010 (UTC)
 * 9) * Some underlinking in the body.
 * 10) **Still? Kreivi Wolter 17:47, May 18, 2010 (UTC)
 * 11) *-- 1358  (Talk) 18:30, May 16, 2010 (UTC)

Comments

Arden Lyn

 * Nominated by: Thefourdotelipsis 01:06, May 10, 2010 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: Bleh.

(1 ACs/3 Users/4 Total)
Support
 * 1) Good job. Darth Trayus ( Trayus Academy ) 01:50, May 13, 2010 (UTC)
 * 2) Another Emperor's Hand down. Xicer9 [[Image:atgar.svg|20px]]( Combadge) 00:30, May 14, 2010 (UTC)
 * 3) Now feature both Hoar and Thok. --Skippy Farlstendoiro 14:50, May 17, 2010 (UTC)
 * 4)  Cavalier One FarStar Logo.jpg( Squadron channel ) 09:02, May 18, 2010 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) Trayus Academy:
 * 2) * No quotes anywhere?
 * 3) **No. Not unless there's a taunt in Teras Kasi. If there is, I haven't been able to find it.
 * 4) * Contextify First Great Schism in the intro.
 * 5) **Done.
 * 6) * Provide some kind of time marker/indicator of era in that first paragraph of the intro. As it stands, you go from that information to saying she was awakened 25,000 years later, but we don't know 25,000 after what.
 * 7) **But it's immediately qualified in that sentence, with "Great Jedi Purge."
 * 8) * You use "although" twice in quick succession in the intro. Substitute one.
 * 9) **Done.
 * 10) * Can we get a "circa" date for her death in the infobox?
 * 11) **Yep, done.
 * 12) * Same goes for the time marker in the first bio paragraph. It needs some kind of indicator of the era in which this all occurred.
 * 13) **Done.
 * 14) * Contextify the Legions of Lettow and the First Great Schism.
 * 15) **The context is given in subsequent sentences.
 * 16) ***Where? There needs to be some kind of indicator of what the Legions are, because right now the only think I see is what they did, which is fight the Jedi. As far as context for the First Great Schism, there needs to be some mention of why there was a schism, which would also help explain what the Legions of Lettow are.
 * 17) ****I think it's better explained now; take a shufti.
 * 18) * The transition between her ascension and her duel with Pina is really awkward. Can you find a better transitioning sentence than "In turn, she was cornered by Jedi Master Awdrysta Pina."?
 * 19) **Fixed.
 * 20) ***Just out of curiosity, is "cornered" the exact term from the source?
 * 21) ****Switched to "tracked down."
 * 22) *" Somehow, due to her possession of the Kashi Mer talisman, Lyn survived Pina's attack in a Force trance,[1] possibly due to her study of Palawan techniques,[4]  and her decomposed body was located approximately 25,000 years later at the end of the Great Jedi Purge in the Unknown Regions by Emperor  Palpatine's Jedi hunters, the Inquisitors."&mdash;please break this up. In one very long sentence you cover way to much information for it to be read clearly and concisely.
 * 23) **Split.
 * 24) * "Inquisitors Antinnis Tremayne, Ameesa Darys, and Grand Inquisitor Laddinare Torbin located, alongside her body, the Kashi Mer talisman, and when brought into the proximity of Lyn, she was reawakened, and her body was rejuvenated."&mdash;this sentence can be streamlined or broken up to reduce the comma usage and awkward flow.
 * 25) **Fixed.
 * 26) * Context for chaos. My suggestion would be to change that to the Netherworld of the Force, but it needs something else.
 * 27) **I'm using the exact words of the source there, and it doesn't go into specifics, making this a bit difficult. I've tried something... see if that works.
 * 28) * Link Galactic Empire and Zaarin splinter government somewhere in the bio.
 * 29) **Done.
 * 30) * Can we prose-ify some of those quotes in the BTS? I'm not so worried about the second, but the first definitely needs to be.
 * 31) **Fixed.
 * 32) * Darth Trayus ( Trayus Academy ) 05:34, May 12, 2010 (UTC)
 * 33) **Thanks for the review. Thefourdotelipsis 07:30, May 12, 2010 (UTC)
 * 34) Going off of Trayus's first objection, after some Youtube searching I was able to find a couple of Lyn's taunts: "I shall be triumphant!" and "You are a pitiful fighter." Could you add these in? Otherwise, awesome work.  Xicer9 [[Image:atgar.svg|20px]]( Combadge) 16:18, May 13, 2010 (UTC)
 * 35) *Your thoroughness of searchery continues to bamboozle me, Xicer. Done and done. Thefourdotelipsis 23:35, May 13, 2010 (UTC)
 * 36) Skippy Farlstendoiro
 * 37) * Following his RPG stats in Star Wars Gamer, she speaks Basic, Bunduki language and Old Galactic Standard, and has skills to repair technology and disable explosives. Add that to P&T.
 * 38) **I've got most of that in the P&A already, where it's most suited, but I've added the two last parts.
 * 39) * Say something in the Succession Box empty square ("None, position dissolved" or something like that), and source it.
 * 40) **The thing is, we don't know that the Legions were dissolved after Lyn's death. As far as I'm aware, no source explicitly states that the Legions were destroyed immediately afterwards, at least, not the sources I was dealing with. So I'm not really sure what I could put in there, and attribute. Suggestions?
 * 41) ***Suggestion: A line under BtS to explain the unusual succession box if you want.--Skippy Farlstendoiro 14:50, May 17, 2010 (UTC)
 * 42) *Very good job.Skippy Farlstendoiro 14:35, May 17, 2010 (UTC)
 * 43) **Thanks for the review. Thefourdotelipsis 14:47, May 17, 2010 (UTC)

Comments

Halmere

 * Nominated by: Thefourdotelipsis 01:06, May 10, 2010 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: Fneh.

(2 ACs/2 Users/4 Total)
Support
 * 1) Nothing to object. --Skippy Farlstendoiro 08:53, May 14, 2010 (UTC)
 * 2) Watch your linking, or I'll bite you on the arm.  Chack Jadson  (Talk)  21:19, May 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 3) -- 1358  (Talk) 05:08, May 17, 2010 (UTC)
 * 4)  Cavalier One FarStar Logo.jpg( Squadron channel ) 09:24, May 18, 2010 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) "Interrogation of Canna Omonda:" "...and was given an escort of three Imperial Star Destroyers for her journey." Imperial SD currently redirects to Imperial I-class Star Destroyer. If it isn't known what type of SDs these were, please link just to Star Destroyer. --  1358  (Talk) 18:40, May 16, 2010 (UTC)
 * 2) *Actually, it links to the more general article for Imperial-class Star Destroyer. Which happens to be a stub, but it's an article all the same. I've pipelinked it to avoid linking to a redirect, however. Thefourdotelipsis 23:22, May 16, 2010 (UTC)

Comments

Lunker

 * Nominated by:  Clone Commander Lee  Talk 18:25, May 10, 2010 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: A Gungan....

(0 ACs/1 Users/1 Total)
Support
 * 1) -- 1358  (Talk) 18:49, May 11, 2010 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) Before I read through it thoroughly: You don't mention Cad Bane in the bio, still you mention a Duros. This is somewhat confusing. --  1358  (Talk) 12:50, May 11, 2010 (UTC)
 * 2) *Facepalm. Fixed.  Clone Commander Lee  Talk 17:56, May 11, 2010 (UTC)
 * 3) From the Xd of Xd1358
 * 4) * Split up the first sentence of the intro.
 * 5) **Fixed.
 * 6) * Is Sidious worth a mention in the intro?
 * 7) **Context.
 * 8) *** Then could you possibly merge the context sentence with the previous one? Something like "...from abduction by the Duros bounty hunter Cad Bane, who had been ordered to capture Force-sensitive children by the Sith Lord Darth Sidious." -- 1358  (Talk) 18:36, May 11, 2010 (UTC)
 * 9) ****Jep.  Clone Commander Lee  Talk 18:39, May 11, 2010 (UTC)
 * 10) * "Typho reported to the Jedi that Page's family had been notified and introduced them to Lunker." So, did they introduce Page's family to Lunker?
 * 11) **Fixed.
 * 12) * "Lunker brought Tano to Jan-gwa city, where the two Jedi set a trap for Bane." Sounds like Lunker is one of the Jedi who organized the trap. Please reword.
 * 13) **Fixed.
 * 14) * "Skywalker and Tano were able to save Page from Bane's attempt to abduct her, capturing the bounty hunter." Right now it sounds like that Bane was captured because the Jedi managed to save the child, while it should clarify that he was captured with the trap.
 * 15) **Fixed.
 * 16) *-- 1358  (Talk) 18:08, May 11, 2010 (UTC)
 * 17) **Thank you.  Clone Commander Lee  Talk 18:17, May 11, 2010 (UTC)
 * 18) * One more thing before voting: Ordered is not the same thing as tasked. To task is to give someone a mission while ordering is something one can't decline. Please decide whether Sidious tasked (IMO) or ordered Bane. Otherwise, good read about a obscure Gungan. :P -- 1358  (Talk) 18:41, May 11, 2010 (UTC)
 * 19) **Fixed and thanks.  Clone Commander Lee  Talk 18:46, May 11, 2010 (UTC)
 * 20) Where's the quote? Kreivi Wolter 19:24, May 11, 2010 (UTC)
 * 21) *Facepalm. Asked JMAS.  Clone Commander Lee  Talk 19:41, May 12, 2010 (UTC)
 * 22) **Lee, you should be able to add a quote in the article yourself.  JangFett  (Talk) 18:47, May 14, 2010 (UTC)
 * 23) ***Added.  Clone Commander Lee  Talk 14:50, May 15, 2010 (UTC)

Comments
 * Please remember to properly format novel appearances/references: "Star Wars: The Clone Wars novelization," not "Star Wars: The Clone Wars (novel)." I've done this for you, but be sure to do it in the future. -- 1358  (Talk) 11:48, May 12, 2010 (UTC)
 * Thank you.  Clone Commander Lee  Talk 19:41, May 12, 2010 (UTC)

Dendro

 * Nominated by: Jedi Kasra (comlink) 13:19, May 11, 2010 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: Another Jedi killed by Vader&hellip;

(2 ACs/4 Users/6 Total)
Support
 * 1) Pre-nom reviewed. &mdash;Master Jonathan(Jedi Council Chambers) 19:06, May 11, 2010 (UTC)
 * 2)  Clone Commander Lee  Talk 19:31, May 12, 2010 (UTC)
 * 3) SoresuMakashi ( Everything I tell you is a lie  the truth  ) 02:20, May 16, 2010 (UTC)
 * 4) Good work. -- 1358  (Talk) 18:49, May 16, 2010 (UTC)
 * 5) Good job. Toprawa and Ralltiir 02:29, May 18, 2010 (UTC)
 * 6)  Cavalier One FarStar Logo.jpg( Squadron channel ) 09:13, May 19, 2010 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) Lee attacks...after Order 66. Hm, did I execute that Order?
 * 2) * Possible a mention that his master was a Ovoni in the intro.
 * 3) **Done.--Jedi Kasra (comlink) 02:06, May 12, 2010 (UTC)
 * 4) * Is "Jedi Master" really needed after his master's name in the infobox ?
 * 5) **This is common practice, from what I've seen.--Jedi Kasra (comlink) 02:06, May 12, 2010 (UTC)
 * 6) * The first two sentences of the second paragraph of the bio are a little choppy. Merge please.
 * 7) **You sure? Those are two large sentences.--Jedi Kasra (comlink) 02:06, May 12, 2010 (UTC)
 * 8) *  the Sith Lord used the Force to push the Padawan to push him back, forward ?
 * 9) **Fixed.--Jedi Kasra (comlink) 02:06, May 12, 2010 (UTC)
 * 10) * Did Vader stabbed/beheaded etc. Dendro ?
 * 11) **The comic doesn't specify.--Jedi Kasra (comlink) 02:06, May 12, 2010 (UTC)
 * 12) *Otherwise nice work. Hope you find time for his master. And we had the discussion about the lightsaber colour so I won't object it. Always happy to review your articles.  Clone Commander Lee  Talk 18:07, May 11, 2010 (UTC)
 * 13) **Thanks for the review, Lee, happy to receive them. Yes, I am working on Hylon, actually.--Jedi Kasra (comlink) 02:06, May 12, 2010 (UTC)
 * 14) Soresu
 * 15) * Dendro, a Human male, served the Jedi Order as a Padawan during the Clone Wars. During this time, he came under the tutelage of the Ovoni Jedi Master Hylon. You're basically saying that during his time as a padawan, he came under the tutelage of the Ovoni Jedi Master Hylon. The problem with that is that you don't become a Padawan until you have a Master. Maybe you should just say he served the order and move the padawan bit into the next sentence.
 * 16) **Please try it.--Jedi Kasra (comlink) 15:43, May 14, 2010 (UTC)
 * 17) * Vader grasped Dendro by his neck and removed his hood, recognizing that Dendro was a Padawan. Is it said how he knew? Did he recognize him personally, or notice a padawan braid? SoresuMakashi ( Everything I tell you is a lie  the truth  ) 02:54, May 14, 2010 (UTC)
 * 18) **Please try it. Thanks for the review, Soresu. --Jedi Kasra (comlink) 15:43, May 14, 2010 (UTC)

Comments
 * The sources of the quotes say that all quotes are from Seconds to die, but there is only The Hidden Blade in the source-list. Is it a mistake or not? Nahdar Vebb 08:43, May 14, 2010 (UTC)
 * Don't know how I made this mistake, fixed. Thanks for pointing that out.--Jedi Kasra (comlink) 15:49, May 14, 2010 (UTC)
 * No problem. I thought: I've Seconds to Die, but why I don't know him? This must be a mistake. 19:41, May 14, 2010 (UTC)

Dengless Rinn

 * Nominated by: Skippy Farlstendoiro 06:21, May 14, 2010 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: Moustache! Moustache!

(0 ACs/0 Users/0 Total)
Support

Object

Comments

Yutsen

 * Nominated by: Jonjedigrandmaster  ( Talk ) 16:40, May 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: My first guest nom for WP:TCW in quite a while; done on a whim

(2 ACs/3 Users/5 Total)
Support
 * 1) -- 1358  (Talk) 16:48, May 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 2) Fine work, Jonny. :)  JangFett  (Talk) 17:18, May 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 3) Hooray journalists. Hooray beer. Toprawa and Ralltiir 19:11, May 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 4)  Chack Jadson  (Talk)  21:12, May 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 5)  Clone Commander Lee  Talk 11:05, May 16, 2010 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) Some context on Binks in the bio. --  1358  (Talk) 16:44, May 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 2) *D'oh! Added; thanks for the review. Jonjedigrandmaster  ( Talk ) 16:46, May 15, 2010 (UTC)

Comments

Artruk

 * Nominated by:  JangFett  (Talk) 04:44, May 16, 2010 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: Another webcomic extra, I guess. :P

(3 ACs/2 Users/5 Total)
Support
 * 1)  Chack Jadson  (Talk)  22:38, May 16, 2010 (UTC)
 * 2) Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 21:06, May 18, 2010 (UTC)
 * 3) Toprawa and Ralltiir 00:40, May 19, 2010 (UTC)
 * 4) -- 1358  (Talk) 04:53, May 19, 2010 (UTC)
 * 5) And here comes the last vote. Kreivi Wolter 09:58, May 19, 2010 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) And here comes Kreivi
 * 2) * "Soon, Artruk and Argente entered a holographic meeting with tactical droid TX-20 and Separatist Council member, Emir Wat Tambor." First, TX-20? This, this, and this articles tells that the droid presented in the comic is TA-175. And secondly, "entered a holographic meeting". This seems to indicate that Artruk and Argente were contacted by Tambor and his droid, while in reality they were secretly spied by the pair through Tambor's spy droid.
 * 3) **Addressed
 * 4) * What caused Tambor to change Ryloth's priority number?
 * 5) **Addressed
 * 6) ***I do believe it wasn't Artruk's "discussion about Ryloth" what make Tambor to invade Ryloth, but rather the treasures Artruk was hiding on the city.
 * 7) ****Yeah, addressed.
 * 8) * Per rule 16, could you add at least one more image? Kreivi Wolter 15:44, May 16, 2010 (UTC)
 * 9) **Addressed. Thanks for the review.  JangFett  (Talk) 16:35, May 16, 2010 (UTC)
 * 10) He lived "in the planet Ryloth"? Someone can't live inside a planet unless they're underground. This is only a passing objection, but please make sure that there aren't other errors like this lying around.  CC7567  (talk) 17:45, May 16, 2010 (UTC)
 * 11) *Yeah, addressed.  JangFett  (Talk) 17:55, May 16, 2010 (UTC)
 * 12) From the Moffship of Grand Moff Tranner:
 * 13) * Last paragraph in the bio is missing a final reference.
 * 14) * Also for the bio, you may want to mention that the Confederacy did invade Ryloth (and cite it with the proper reference, of course).
 * 15) *Nice job. Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 20:26, May 18, 2010 (UTC)
 * 16) **Both addressed; thanks for the review, Tranner.  JangFett  (Talk) 20:58, May 18, 2010 (UTC)

Comments

Boba Fett and the Assassin Droids

 * Nominated by: Skippy Farlstendoiro 15:55, May 16, 2010 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: Let's rock!

(0 ACs/4 Users/4 Total)
Support
 * 1)  Clone Commander Lee  Talk 18:49, May 16, 2010 (UTC)
 * 2) Heh.--Jedi Kasra (comlink) 21:26, May 16, 2010 (UTC)
 * 3) Imperialles 11:39, May 18, 2010 (UTC)
 * 4) Good work. -- 1358  (Talk) 14:55, May 18, 2010 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) Toprawa:
 * 2) *You currently link and reference to the GG6 disambig page. Please specify first and/or second edition. Toprawa and Ralltiir 22:32, May 16, 2010 (UTC)
 * 3) **Done. --Skippy Farlstendoiro 06:22, May 17, 2010 (UTC)
 * 4) Could you merge the two youmay templates? --  1358  (Talk) 14:58, May 17, 2010 (UTC)
 * 5) *Like this? --Skippy Farlstendoiro 15:00, May 17, 2010 (UTC)
 * 6) Xd
 * 7) * In the intro, you say that Boba Fett did not care about the band, however, in the "Organization" section, you state that experts believed that he would not care. Please decide which one is correct.
 * 8) **Better? --Skippy Farlstendoiro 06:36, May 18, 2010 (UTC)
 * 9) *That's it. -- 1358  (Talk) 17:19, May 17, 2010 (UTC)
 * 10) A few things:
 * 11) * Alien is a humanocentric word; might be better to simply use the term "non-Human"
 * 12) **Let's say organic non-Humans to avoid confusion with droids, if you will. --Skippy Farlstendoiro 06:36, May 18, 2010 (UTC)
 * 13) * Intro: "Boba Fett and the Assassin Droids was an underground musical group named after a famous bounty hunter and an illegal technology" This sentence presumes prior knowledge of both Fett and assassin droids. Reword it to something like "named after the bounty hunter Boba Fett and assassin droids, considered an illegal technology by the Galactic Empire." That way, you also eliminate the ugly links in the bolded part.
 * 14) **Done. --Skippy Farlstendoiro 06:36, May 18, 2010 (UTC)
 * 15) * Intro: "in a vain attempt to stop them." Unsuccessful is probably a better word than vain in this context.
 * 16) **Done. --Skippy Farlstendoiro 06:36, May 18, 2010 (UTC)
 * 17) * History: "to be too dangerous for broadcasting." Dangerous how? Politically? Clarify.
 * 18) **Changed; this is all the OS specified. --Skippy Farlstendoiro 06:36, May 18, 2010 (UTC)
 * 19) *--Imperialles 17:30, May 17, 2010 (UTC)

Comments

Blue Wing

 * Nominated by: Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 23:04, May 16, 2010 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: No clever comment this time. I know, you're all devastated.

(1 ACs/2 Users/3 Total)
Support Object
 * 1) Farl here, I'm ready to vote. --Skippy Farlstendoiro 06:54, May 18, 2010 (UTC)
 * 2) Toprawa and Ralltiir 17:11, May 19, 2010 (UTC)
 * 3)  JangFett  (Talk) 17:16, May 19, 2010 (UTC)
 * 1) Skippy Farlstendoiro
 * 2) * Biography, 1st paragraph, last sentence is unsourced!
 * 3) **Leftover from a previous edit. Gone now.
 * 4) * I get we don't know whether he survived the battle or not. Right?
 * 5) **Nothing reveals his fate.
 * 6) *Skippy Farlstendoiro 14:47, May 17, 2010 (UTC)
 * 7) **Thanks for the review. Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 19:20, May 17, 2010 (UTC)

Comments

Jallar Golin

 * Nominated by: Xicer9 [[Image:atgar.svg|20px]]( Combadge) 17:43, May 17, 2010 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: Another minor Emperor's Hand.

(0 ACs/1 Users/1 Total)
Support
 * 1) Good to have some of these at Hand. --Skippy Farlstendoiro 15:30, May 18, 2010 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) Farl
 * 2) * Bio, 2nd paragraph: You use the word "shuttle" six times. Couldn't you replace some of them with a synonym or something? --Skippy Farlstendoiro 08:26, May 18, 2010 (UTC)
 * 3) **I cut it down to three. Thanks for the review. Xicer9 [[Image:atgar.svg|20px]]( Combadge) 15:22, May 18, 2010 (UTC)

Comments

Na'daz

 * Nominated by:  Clone Commander Lee  Talk 18:05, May 17, 2010 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: 292 words. My first project for WP:NSW

(0 ACs/1 Users/1 Total)
Support
 * 1) SoresuMakashi ( Everything I tell you is a lie  the truth  ) 04:00, May 20, 2010 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) Tommy:
 * 2) * A skilled fighter with a lightsaber, Na'daz traveled once to the Mid Rim world Nal Hutta and discovered a young Force-sensitive Twi'lek named Kas'im. The beginning of this sentence, "A skilled fighter with a lightsaber," has nothing to do with the rest of the sentence. Please rework. —Tommy 9281 19:29, May 17, 2010 (UTC)
 * 3) **Fixed. Thank you for the review.  Clone Commander Lee  Talk 17:22, May 18, 2010 (UTC)
 * 4) *Also, calling Na'daz "powerful" is POV. Did someone consider him powerful? —Tommy 9281 21:17, May 18, 2010 (UTC)
 * 5) **Yes, Kas'im did. Take a look at the head quote. :)  Clone Commander Lee  Talk 17:08, May 19, 2010 (UTC)
 * 6) ***Great doesn't necessarily mean powerful."Great" has many different meanings according to Dictionary.com, and with no further (or explicit) detail given on Na'daz's "greatness", we can't assume the text is referring to power. —Tommy 9281 17:57, May 19, 2010 (UTC)
 * 7) Just at a glance, I see major tense shifting issues in the intro and bio.  Jonjedigrandmaster  ( Talk ) 20:35, May 17, 2010 (UTC)
 * 8) *Please try.  Clone Commander Lee  Talk 17:37, May 18, 2010 (UTC)
 * 9) **Looks like one was fixed by Tommy during his copyedit. Please see my edit for exactly what I meant. Jonjedigrandmaster  ( Talk ) 17:46, May 18, 2010 (UTC)
 * 10) ***Thank you very much, I did.  Clone Commander Lee  Talk 17:53, May 18, 2010 (UTC)
 * 11) Soresu
 * 12) * There's some things in the intro you make no mention of in the bio.
 * 13) **Fixed.
 * 14) * Na'daz traveled once This suggests that he only ever went to Nal Hutta once in his lifetime, which we do not know. Reword a little.
 * 15) **Fixed.
 * 16) * A few things in the P&A could be mentioned in the intro/bio
 * 17) **Fixed.
 * 18) * Kas'im later gave Na'daz's lightsaber to his greatest student, Bane Greatest is POV. SoresuMakashi ( Everything I tell you is a lie  the truth  ) 11:30, May 18, 2010 (UTC)
 * 19) **Fixed. Thank you.  Clone Commander Lee  Talk 17:22, May 18, 2010 (UTC)

Comments

Gode Takrab

 * Nominated by: Skippy Farlstendoiro 06:21, May 18, 2010 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: The Trade Federation has gone to Farl this time.

(0 ACs/0 Users/0 Total)
Support

Object

Comments

Belo Tusus

 * Nominated by: Thefourdotelipsis 11:47, May 18, 2010 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: The belated sequel to Nem Bees, I guess. A WTS offshoot!

(0 ACs/0 Users/0 Total)
Support

Object

Comments

Hogrum Chalk

 * Nominated by: Menkooroo 06:22, May 19, 2010 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: Chalk it up to my love of the IK's.

(0 ACs/2 Users/2 Total)
Support
 * 1) OK with me.  Clone Commander Lee  Talk 17:15, May 19, 2010 (UTC)
 * 2) Chalk this one up there with you other excellent IK articles.--Jedi Kasra (comlink) 19:57, May 19, 2010 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) Trayus
 * 2) *"When Imperial Knight Azlyn Rae was grievously injured by the Sith Emperor Darth Krayt while battling him on Had Abbadon, she was fitted with life-preserving armor by the mechanic "Bantha" Rawk  on Kiffex before returning to the Imperial capital  of Bastion; after her arrival at the fortress world, Chalk fitted with her new armor." This sentence is a little tough to get through, just out of virtue of length and the numerous indicators of time. You have a "when", a "while", a "was", a "before", and an "after." See if you can streamline it.
 * 3) *My only other thing is that the P&T seems to have several phrases lifted directly from the above quote. If you could, can you find some suitable synonyms to use?
 * 4) *Trayus out. Darth Trayus ( Trayus Academy ) 06:28, May 20, 2010 (UTC)

Comments

Douglas III

 * Nominated by: Toprawa and Ralltiir 04:39, May 20, 2010 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments:

(0 ACs/1 Users/1 Total)
Support
 * 1) Jackelopes! Xicer9 [[Image:atgar.svg|20px]]( Combadge) 05:36, May 20, 2010 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) Just one: Could you list and source the planet's orbital position in the infobox?  Xicer9 [[Image:atgar.svg|20px]]( Combadge) 05:13, May 20, 2010 (UTC)
 * 2) *Done. I've also added the Outer Rim to the infobox's "Region" field in addition to the Centrality while I was at it. Toprawa and Ralltiir 05:21, May 20, 2010 (UTC)
 * 3) ** Actually, I have a question about that. The Atlas Online Companion lists the Centrality as the the planet's sector, so shouldn't the Centrality be listed in the infobox's "sector" parameter? Or is the Online Companion mistaken in calling the Centrality a sector? Xicer9 [[Image:atgar.svg|20px]]( Combadge) 05:29, May 20, 2010 (UTC)
 * 4) ***Haha, I'm glad you brought this up, because I was thinking the exact same thing. My original rationale was that every source I've used for this article, except the Online Companion, calls the Centrality a "region," and we currently categorize it as such, but clearly all Atlas material treats it akin to a sector. So yeah, it's probably best to organize it as a sector for our purposes. Change made. Toprawa and Ralltiir 05:33, May 20, 2010 (UTC)

Comments