Wookieepedia:Good article nominations/Jin-Lo Rayce


 * ''The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a good article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Jin-Lo Rayce

 * Nominated by: Jedi Kasra (comlink) 05:33, December 27, 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: Has been mentioned only in passing, but established a Force-using organization during the Dark Times, hmmm&hellip;

(3 ACs/2 Users/5 Total)
Support
 * 1) SoresuMakashi ( Everything I tell you is a lie  the truth  ) 09:57, December 31, 2009 (UTC)
 * 2) Dangerdan97 19:21, December 31, 2009 (UTC)
 * 3)  Chack Jadson  (Talk)  16:24, January 17, 2010 (UTC)
 * 4) Good job. Toprawa and Ralltiir 22:28, January 27, 2010 (UTC)
 * 5)  Jonjedigrandmaster  ( Jedi Beacon ) 18:02, February 2, 2010 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) Toprawa:
 * 2) * Per the Manual of Style based on community consensus, "A quote is NOT: 1. Narrative prose that is not actual spoken dialogue or a character's personal memoirs, journal, or diary. This means that thoughts are not considered quotable material." Unfortunately, this article's P/T quote falls into that category. Please remove or replace with another relevant quote.
 * 3) **Ughh, totally forgot this. Deleted.--Jedi Kasra (comlink) 22:25, January 27, 2010 (UTC)
 * 4) * While I understand your reasoning for placing it as you have, I feel the last sentence of the P/T is more appropriate for the P/A. I figured I'll let you make the appropriate change/rewording. Toprawa and Ralltiir 22:18, January 27, 2010 (UTC)
 * 5) **Please try it.--Jedi Kasra (comlink) 22:25, January 27, 2010 (UTC)
 * 6) The Grand Master
 * 7) * "and survived on what he could find." What exactly is this supposed to mean?
 * 8) **I think Dangerdan removed this before I could get it.--Jedi Kasra (comlink) 17:39, February 2, 2010 (UTC)
 * 9) * Part of the P&T seems to be just recapping what you've already said in the bio. Could it be tweaked to show more specifically what you're saying about his personality?
 * 10) **Please try it.--Jedi Kasra (comlink) 17:39, February 2, 2010 (UTC)
 * 11) *Nice work. Jonjedigrandmaster  ( Jedi Beacon ) 20:05, January 31, 2010 (UTC)
 * 12) **Thanks for the review, Jon.--Jedi Kasra (comlink) 17:39, February 2, 2010 (UTC)
 * 13) Toprawa's Post-Voting Objections:
 * 14) * Not sure what the point was of someone completely rewriting the P/T of this article, but you'll need to either confirm for me that this is exactly what the source material says, or else it needs to be removed or reworded. Specifically:
 * 15) * "When he was a Jedi, Jin-Lo Rayce was remakably studious..." "Remarkably?" Really? I'm sensing that's over-embellishment.
 * 16) **No, Dangerdan added that before I could take care of Jon's objection.--Jedi Kasra (comlink) 18:14, February 2, 2010 (UTC)
 * 17) * "Rayce became an adept survivor" Ditto. Does the source material say this precisely? How do we know he wasn't already an adept survivor? Toprawa and Ralltiir 18:05, February 2, 2010 (UTC)
 * 18) **Dan added this too, removed.--Jedi Kasra (comlink) 18:14, February 2, 2010 (UTC)
 * 19) **Ideally, Kasra, entire sections of nominated articles are not rewritten after they've already received nearly enough votes to pass. As the nominator of the article, this is your responsibility to monitor and maintain. This should not be a regular occurrence. Toprawa and Ralltiir 18:05, February 2, 2010 (UTC)
 * 20) ***I realize this, but I was not the one who rewrote the BTS. I just edited it for the objections you posted above. Please try it.--Jedi Kasra (comlink) 18:14, February 2, 2010 (UTC)
 * 21) ****Kasra, it doesn't matter who added them. The point is, this is your nomination and thus it becomes your responsibility to make sure everything added to the article is viable. If not, it becomes your responsibility during the nomination process to remove whatever doesn't belong. Toprawa and Ralltiir 18:47, February 2, 2010 (UTC)

Comments


 * Guest nom for WP:TFU.--Jedi Kasra (comlink) 19:19, December 29, 2009 (UTC)
 * Their appears to be some missing info which Dan has just added. Before this is approved, Kasra, could you check on this, please, and make sure there is no more missing info? Jonjedigrandmaster  ( Jedi Beacon ) 18:07, February 2, 2010 (UTC)
 * I had just noticed that no mention had been made of some of the talents available to Agents of Ossus such as Vanish and Buried presence. Sorry for messing things up for Kasra, if that's what I've done. Dangerdan97 18:24, February 2, 2010 (UTC)
 * No, you didn't mess much up. I have to remove the talents, just because the Agents used them doesn't necessarily mean that he used them.--Jedi Kasra (comlink) 18:29, February 2, 2010 (UTC)