Wookieepedia:Featured article nominations/Denal


 * ''The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a featured article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Denal

 * Nominated by: QuiGonJinn Be mindful of the Living Force...[[Image:Quigonheadshot.jpg|16px]] 17:28, 1 February 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: My first-ever FA nom.

(6 Inqs/2 Users/8 Total)
Support
 * 1) Cull Tremayne 08:22, 9 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 2) CC7567  [ http://images1.wikia.nocookie.net/starwars/images/thumb/5/5f/Rex.png/20px-Rex.png] talk 00:29, 15 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 3) —Tommy  [[Image:Dark side Master SWGTCG.jpg|17px]] ( Nine two eight one ) 16:51, 1 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 4)  Chack Jadson  (Talk)  00:12, 18 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 5)  Cavalier One [[Image:FarStar Logo.jpg|20px]]( Squadron channel ) 13:56, 18 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 6) Thefourdotelipsis 03:00, 19 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 7)  &mdash;Lucius malfoy7  [[Image:Nute777.png|20px]] ( Give it up for Lil' 'Soka Tano, ladies and gents! ) 15:26, 19 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 8) --Eyrezer 22:57, 24 April 2009 (UTC)

Oppose
 * 1) From the Council Chambers:
 * 2) * "Skywalker then ordered to trigger the explosives..." Who?
 * 3) **I don't quite understand. It's pretty much elaborated on who Skywalker is.
 * 4) ***Who did Skywalker order to trigger the explosives?
 * 5) ****Addressed.
 * 6) * In the BtS, you say that the rank of commander is probably game mechanics, yet he is listed as a commander in the in-universe P&T section. This is a little confusing.
 * 7) **This "commander" in the P&T doesn't mean "rank", but rather "a person who commands". I can change it to something else if it is still confusing.
 * 8) ***I understand where you're coming from, but it's still a little confusing. I think it could use a rewording.
 * 9) ****Reworded a bit. QuiGonJinn Be mindful of the Living Force...[[Image:Quigonheadshot.jpg|16px]] 18:24, 3 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 10) * Overlinking: Several articles, including clone trooper, 501st Legion, and Anakin Skywalker, among others, are linked more than once.
 * 11) **An article should be linked once in the infobox, once in the intro and once in the main body. So they are. I've only found a couple of overlinked articles, but they don't include those listed above.
 * 12) ***Okay, my mistake. I'll strike.
 * 13) *I did a copyedit for you. Next time, you should probably have someone do a copyedit for you before the nom; a second set of eyes can catch things that the person that wrote the article misses. I'm always willing to copyedit articles; just let me know on my talk page. Master JonathanJedi Council Chambers 07:26, 3 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 14) **Thanks. I'll ask you next time. QuiGonJinn Be mindful of the Living Force...[[Image:Quigonheadshot.jpg|16px]] 10:03, 3 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 15) Tommy:
 * 16) * You go back & forth between Confederacy & Seperatists; please choose one.
 * 17) **Aren't they the same? I mean it's like using "the Empire" and the "Imperials" or the "Rebel Alliance" and the "Rebels" in the same article. It reduces the amount of repititions of the same word. I've seen such occurences in many articles, even FAs.
 * 18) ***In that case, I concede. —Tommy [[Image:Dark side Master SWGTCG.jpg|17px]] ( Nine two eight one ) 02:13, 9 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 19) * Who dispatched Denal to Tatooine?
 * 20) **Addressed.
 * 21) * "After clearing the base from the hostiles, Denal grew even more suspicious, as he was informed about the droid presence in the desert." When you say from the hostiles, do you mean that he destroyed them?
 * 22) **Yes, I do mean it.
 * 23) * Same sentence. Who informed Denal of the droid presence in the desert?
 * 24) **Addressed.
 * 25) * "His suspicions finally proved true when the Republic discovered a hidden Confederacy research station."I imagine that the hidden research station is the droid presence that Denal suspected, but it reads like the Republic found it for him. Where was it hidden? Was he not a part of whatever division of the Republic found that found it? Also, it reads like the station is empty.
 * 26) **Hopefully addressed. Yes, the Republic found it for him. And no, he wasn't a part of the division that found it.
 * 27) * " After downloading the secret plans hidden there, Denal barely escaped the installation." How could he barely escape if he previously cleared the place of all hostiles?
 * 28) **There were two bases. The one that he cleared and the one that he escaped from.
 * 29) ***So then, the second one is full of droids? Why did they barely escape? You need to specify a little more as to why they barely escaped.
 * 30) ****Provided some context.
 * 31) * You start this section saying that Denal was dispatched. Later you start talking about the Republic, and "they". Up until that point it reads like Denal went to Tatooine alone.
 * 32) **Addressed, I think.
 * 33) * "Once inside, Denal's troops encountered a Jedi, who joined them in a quest to free Skywalker's Padawan." Who's the mystery Jedi? If there is a name, it needs to stated & linked.
 * 34) **There is no name. It may be Obi-Wan though, because first you receive a message from him and then see that hooded guy. However, he is called just "Jedi" in the dialogue. I'm going to replay the game to confirm. QuiGonJinn Be mindful of the Living Force...[[Image:Quigonheadshot.jpg|16px]] 12:49, 2 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 35) ***If we can't figure out who he is, then something in the BtS needs to talk about that.
 * 36) ****Added some tidbits in the Bts.
 * 37) * Stay tuned. —Tommy [[Image:Dark side Master SWGTCG.jpg|17px]] ( Nine two eight one ) 22:50, 1 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 38) * "&hellip;what seems to be the standard blue-colored lieutenant variant of the Phase I armor." Can this statement in the BtS be sourced?
 * 39) **I think the screenshot from the game in the biography section illustrates this.
 * 40) ***So source the statement with a reftag from where the screenshot appears.
 * 41) ****Done. QuiGonJinn There's always a bigger fish. 15:00, 18 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 42) * "His rapid advancement in rank during the game, however, must be reward mechanics and are not representing canonical promotions." What's up with this?
 * 43) **I need a name has put the fact tag there. Honestly, I don't know how to source it. It is just a logical conclusion based on the previous sentence. QuiGonJinn Be mindful of the Living Force...[[Image:Quigonheadshot.jpg|16px]] 23:05, 7 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 44) ***I reworded it, and removed the tag, because IMO it's good now. You may want to get a second opinion on this.  Chack Jadson  (Talk) 23:29, 11 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 45) ****It looks better now. Unfortunately, I need a name seems not satisfied with that. I'll guess I'll have to discuss it with him. QuiGonJinn There's always a bigger fish. 13:23, 12 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 46) *****Well it needs to be fixed somehow before I strike. You may want to contact INAN and see exactly what he wants, since his sourcetag is holding this up. —Tommy [[Image:Dark side Master SWGTCG.jpg|17px]] ( Nine two eight one ) 14:23, 18 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 47) *I really enjoyed this. Be careful however of beginning sentences with "but", but otherwise good work. —Tommy [[Image:Dark side Master SWGTCG.jpg|17px]] ( Nine two eight one ) 22:06, 7 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 48) Eyrezer
 * 49) *An interesting choice for an article. I was previously unaware of the mobile game. First of all, I have added redlinks for a number of the battles/missions that need articles. My naming is perhaps not the best, so feel free to rename those articles, but they need to be added.
 * 50) **All redlinks busted. BTW, after re-playing the game, I've added some more details which you might want to review. QuiGonJinn There's always a bigger fish. 20:23, 9 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 51) * "Denal wore a custom helmet, most likely of his own design". Is the part about design mentioned anyway or just presumed on general practice? If the later, I think it should be removed.
 * 52) **Removed. QuiGonJinn There's always a bigger fish. 20:23, 9 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 53) * The source template for the Pocket Model is not working properly - the link should not be displayed. I am not sure if that is a problem of how you implemented it, or with the template itself.
 * 54) **Fixed it. QuiGonJinn There's always a bigger fish. 11:13, 25 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 55) * How do we know that the Clone Wars episode comes after the game?
 * 56) **Well, when I wrote the article, I based it on the following: at the start of the game, Denal takes charge of the battalion, meaning that prior to that, he was a simple trooper, yet in the episode he has some kind of rank. However, after all that talk surrounding his rank, I'm not sure of such placement. On the other hand, should I base it on the release date, then the episode will come first (November 17), followed by the game (announced on November 19, don't know when it was released, though.). What would you suggest? QuiGonJinn There's always a bigger fish. 19:59, 6 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 57) ***I'll look into it. --Eyrezer 07:47, 7 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 58) ****Unfortunately, I couldn't get the game to work. With regard to the timing of events, I see two issues:
 * 59) ****#Whether it is more or less likely for the Rodia missions to occur before or after "Bombad Jedi".
 * 60) ****#Whether it is more or less likely for the Orto Plutonia missions to occur before or after "Trespass".
 * 61) ****As "Duel of the Droids" seeming occurs before both the episodes on Rodia and Orto Plutonia, it seems to me that the current chronologically can only work if the answer to both questions is "before the episode". The problem is that there is no cohesive TCW timeline anymore, so we cannot know for certain; however, I maintain that we should make our best guess at it, and also explain the timing choices/issues in the Bts or in a footnote. This is also relevant to his rank promotion, as used to be discussed in the Bts. For instance, the missions before he is promoted to the rank of Captain - which Rex was in DOTD - could occur before DOTD, and the rest after. This would keep his promotions intact. Alternatively, they could all be placed after DOTD, in which case any conflict over rank would be avoided. Given that TCW are meant to occur very early on in the Clone Wars, there will be plenty of time for these events to occur later on in the war. I think this is my preferred option. --Eyrezer 06:21, 19 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 62) *****A tag might be appropriate too. --Eyrezer 11:19, 21 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 63) * Can we get a more official link for the bobblehead thing? Is it on RebelScum.com? --Eyrezer 22:05, 24 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 64) **After some googling, I've found a link to Starwars.yahoo.com, an Amazon link, a link to Collectorsgalleryonline.com and a link to Rebelscum.com (although the latter is a sponsor announcement from the Collectors Gallery). Which one is more official and which one should I use? QuiGonJinn There's always a bigger fish. 12:32, 7 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 65) ***Hmm. Unfortunately, none of those have a link to the back side. That being the case, I think it is best to stick with the one there now. I changed the format though. --Eyrezer 11:55, 14 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 66) * I also think it would be a nice touch to add a mention of the size of a battalion to the section about his first Rodia mission. A battalion is 576 troops, which can be sourced to the "Guide to the Grand Army of the Republic" --Eyrezer 06:32, 19 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 67) **Added. QuiGonJinn There's always a bigger fish. 11:48, 19 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 68) * You should mention the location of the listening post, as well as naming it. Can you also provide some context for R2-D2 being missing.
 * 69) **Both addressed.
 * 70) * "During these missions Denal grew suspicious of a large Separatist presence on a previously deserted world and of droids that could somehow evade being detected by Republic radar." Is this previously deserted world Orto Plutonia or is it in reference to Tatooine? I can't tell.
 * 71) **Clarified.
 * 72) * "Once inside, Denal's troops again encountered the Jedi" You need to make this clear that it refers back to the Jedi from Otro Plutonia, not to Obi-Wan who is mentioned in the previous sentence. --Eyrezer 12:18, 24 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 73) **Addressed. QuiGonJinn There's always a bigger fish. 15:11, 24 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 74) Only one thing:
 * 75) * The intro starts off a bit suddenly. That's a pet peeve of mine. Maybe begin with "Denal was a clone trooper of the 501st..."
 * 76) **How does it look now? QuiGonJinn There's always a bigger fish. 11:19, 17 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 77) *Otherwise, nice work.  Chack Jadson  (Talk) 14:19, 12 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 78) "Once inside, Denal's troops encountered a Jedi, who joined them in a quest to free Skywalker's Padawan." - If we don't know who this Jedi is, you should still create a conjectural article about him. You can still make a not about him possibly being Kenobi on that article, and move that out of the BTS here. Also, the "Clone Wars" section could probably do with at least one subsection. Thefourdotelipsis 05:55, 17 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 79) *Did 'em myself. Thefourdotelipsis 03:00, 19 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 80) **And I've taken care of the Unidentified Jedi. QuiGonJinn There's always a bigger fish. 11:48, 19 April 2009 (UTC)

Comments
 * Only slightly less cooler than Rex. QuiGonJinn Be mindful of the Living Force...[[Image:Quigonheadshot.jpg|16px]] 17:28, 1 February 2009 (UTC)
 * Is there not an article for the unnamed superweapon in the cell phone game? Cull Tremayne 08:22, 9 February 2009 (UTC)
 * Not yet, but I'll make it soon. QuiGonJinn Be mindful of the Living Force...[[Image:Quigonheadshot.jpg|16px]] 13:30, 9 February 2009 (UTC)
 * Article created and linked to. QuiGonJinn Be mindful of the Living Force...[[Image:Quigonheadshot.jpg|16px]] 15:41, 9 February 2009 (UTC)
 * I've heard rumors that Denal appears in TCW movie. I'm investigating it now. QuiGonJinn Be mindful of the Living Force...[[Image:Quigonheadshot.jpg|16px]] 14:06, 2 March 2009 (UTC)
 * Found some troopers that looked like Denal from the cell phone version, but then again, it is never stated that one of them was Denal. QuiGonJinn Be mindful of the Living Force...[[Image:Quigonheadshot.jpg|16px]] 23:05, 7 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 1) I'm not a big fan of using the Skytop station image in the earlier section. See if there's another image you can use there, and then move that first image down. Thefourdotelipsis 05:55, 17 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 2) *I'm afraid there are no better images. The Pocket model one is also from the Skytop station, only from a different angle; the mobile phone game's images are all the same, with only the background behind Denal changing from Rodia, to Tatooine, to Orto Plutonia and finally to the Republic ship; and the one from the back of the bobblehead case is just bad quality. I've removed the part about the Skytop station from the current pic's caption, though. I think it looks better now, while still remaining true. QuiGonJinn There's always a bigger fish. 09:42, 17 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 3) **Yes, that is better. Thefourdotelipsis 23:30, 17 April 2009 (UTC)