Wookieepedia:Good article nominations/Darth Kruhl


 * ''The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a good article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Darth Kruhl

 * Nominated by: —Tommy [[Image:Dark Side Master TotG.jpg|17px]] ( Nine two eight one ) 06:04, 30 January 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: Here's another one.

(3 ACs/2 Users/5 Total)
Support
 * 1)  Grunny  (Talk) 03:35, 31 January 2009 (UTC)
 * 23:29, 31 January 2009 (UTC)
 * 1) DC 22:18, 3 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 2) Cylka  -talk- 21:13, 9 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 3) -- AdmirableAckbar (Talk) 16:30, 13 February 2009 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) Grunndawg :P
 * 2) * For clarity, explicitly state that he was a member of the One Sith in intro.
 * 3) **Addressed.
 * 4) * "However, Kruhl's offer was rejected by Rikkar-du, and the Codru-Ji clan leader urged his people to unite against the Sith Empire." Why did Rikar-du decline the offer?
 * 5) **Addressed.
 * 6) * Source "Force lightning and telekinesis, another set of abilities shared among members of Darth Krayt's One Sith." to instances other members of the One Sith using Force lightning and telekinesis.
 * 7) **Addressed.
 * 8) * Do the same for "coral-like hilts carried by most of his One Sith brethren,".
 * 9) **Addressed.
 * 10) * Mention that Fel did not summon his Knights to his defense as he believed as a Knight himself he was a match for Kruhl.
 * 11) **Addressed.
 * 12) *Another nice one Tommy :).  Grunny  (Talk) 06:53, 30 January 2009 (UTC)
 * 13) **Thanks for the review, Grunny. Please advise if more is required. —Tommy [[Image:Dark Side Master TotG.jpg|17px]] ( Nine two eight one ) 13:13, 30 January 2009 (UTC)
 * 14) shot Kruhl in the stomach, and killed him. 'And' would imply that killing him was separate action. If so, please elaborate on how he died. If the shot was fatal, then I would suggest changing it to shot Kruhl in the stomach, killing him.  22:39, 30 January 2009 (UTC)
 * 15) *Addressed. Thanks for the review, Soresu. Please advise if anything further is required. —Tommy [[Image:Dark Side Master TotG.jpg|17px]] ( Nine two eight one ) 12:43, 31 January 2009 (UTC)
 * 16) DC
 * 17) * "The two men fiercely dueled each other" Fiercely is POV.
 * 18) **Addressed.
 * 19) * "He had only exchanged several blows with Fel when the Emperor drew his holdout blaster, shot Kruhl in the stomach."- Only and several contradict each other, rewrite the sentence please.
 * 20) **Addressed.
 * 21) * Mention that Kruhl was only a decoy by Maladi to lower Fel's defense, that's a big part of the issue.
 * 22) **Heh, I know exactly why you pointed this out. Good stuff, and check it out to see if you are satisfied. —Tommy [[Image:Dark Side Master TotG.jpg|17px]] ( Nine two eight one ) 17:36, 3 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 23) * "Kruhl's first appearance was in Star Wars Legacy 13: Ready to Die, written by John Ostrander and Jan Duursema. This was Kruhl's first and only appearance." Combine these two sentences, they're short and choppy.
 * 24) **Addressed.
 * 25) *Have fun :) DC 03:53, 3 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 26) **I did. I taught you how to ;) —Tommy [[Image:Dark Side Master TotG.jpg|17px]] ( Nine two eight one ) 17:36, 3 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 27) AdmirableAckbar:
 * 28) * This isn't a hard and fast objection, but the intro is a bit too big for my liking, for such a short article, which should really only get two paragraph intros, imho.
 * 29) **I removed that bit about him dying for Krayt (which I deemed not really necessary), and combined the 1st & 2nd paragraphs. Please advise if this is still insufficient. —Tommy [[Image:Dark Side Master TotG.jpg|17px]] ( Nine two eight one ) 02:45, 4 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 30) ***Looks much better. -- AdmirableAckbar (Talk) 23:14, 8 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 31) * "Kruhl displayed unusual loyalty to Darth Krayt, and had no reservations about dying for him" -- I wouldn't really say that's unusual, at least when compared to the rest of the One Sith.
 * 32) **Addressed per above.
 * 33) * "Rikkar-Du" or "Rikkar-du"? The former appears in the opening quote, the latter everywhere else. (Unrelated note to self: we need a conjectural capitalization template for such comic characters).
 * 34) **Mistake, addressed.
 * 35) * The first image (which I've downsized a fair bit - 350px is way too big) looks a bit odd to me the way it's positioned in the middle of the paragraph. Not a hard and fast objection, but I'd rather it at the start of one of the paragraphs.
 * 36) **Addressed.
 * 37) * You refer to the Dauntless as "his" Star Destroyer. If that's so, I think it should be mentioned earlier in the article, since he would've come to the planet in it, etc.
 * 38) **How's that?
 * 39) ***Good, but I think it would be prudent to mention the Star Destroyer earlier on, that he got to Munto Codru on it and that it stayed there while he was there, etc.
 * 40) ****Should be good now.
 * 41) * It says Fel was the deposed Emperor, but then later calls him "Emperor Fel." While he's certainly the Emperor in some sense, "Emperor-in-exile" or somesuch would be a more accurate term.
 * 42) **Addressed.
 * 43) ***There's still several instances of "Emperor" referring to Fel.
 * 44) ****Should be good now. —Tommy [[Image:Dark Side Master TotG.jpg|17px]] ( Nine two eight one ) 23:41, 8 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 45) * The fact that Kruhl was just a decoy should be mentioned when he's given the mission.
 * 46) **Addressed.
 * 47) * I'm not a big fan of the use of "mohawk" in the P&T. It should be "Mohawk" capital M, and since it's named for a people that do not exist in the SWU, I'd rather it wasn't used where at all possible. I'd consider it the same as "Pyhrric victory." I'd suggest just describing his hairstyle, though if anyone has any counterpoints I'd be more than happy to hear them.
 * 48) **How's that?
 * 49) * There's a bit here with Jan Duursema saying the character was only created to die that could go in the BtS, to help flesh it out. You could also mention the CSWE in the BtS. You should also contexify Chee in the BtS.
 * 50) **Please advise if the Duursema/Chee parts are sufficient. Please also clarify what you mean when you mention the CSWE in the BtS . —Tommy [[Image:Dark Side Master TotG.jpg|17px]] ( Nine two eight one ) 02:45, 4 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 51) **I have been advised that nothing new about Darth Kruhl appears in CSWE. —Tommy [[Image:Dark Side Master TotG.jpg|17px]] ( Nine two eight one ) 00:47, 5 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 52) ***I still think a mention of CSWE in the BtS would be good, to help flesh it out. Just say he received an entry in CSWE, and who the authors are, when it came out and the like, if you want. -- AdmirableAckbar (Talk) 23:14, 8 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 53) ****Addressed. —Tommy [[Image:Dark Side Master TotG.jpg|17px]] ( Nine two eight one ) 23:41, 8 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 54) **-- AdmirableAckbar (Talk) 20:08, 3 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 55) The only objection I have is in the introduction where it is written however, Fel had been expecting Kruhl - Since it is written in the comic and later on in the article that Fel had been expecting an assassin in general, I feel that this should be reflected in the intro as well. Otherwise, another interesting Sith, Tommy. Cylka  -talk- 23:20, 8 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 56) *Addressed. Thank you for the review, Cylka. Please advise if anything further is required. —Tommy [[Image:Dark Side Master TotG.jpg|17px]] ( Nine two eight one ) 23:42, 8 February 2009 (UTC)

Comments