Wookieepedia:Good article nominations/Fall of Korriban


 * ''The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a good article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Fall of Korriban

 * Nominated by: Darth Trayus ( Trayus Academy ) 03:40, March 1, 2010 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments:One after the other.

(3 ACs/5 Users/8 Total)
Support
 * 1)  JangFett  (Talk) 04:13, March 2, 2010 (UTC)
 * 2) A good read overall. SoresuMakashi ( Everything I tell you is a lie  the truth  ) 04:45, March 2, 2010 (UTC)
 * 3) Jedi Kasra (comlink) 13:25, March 2, 2010 (UTC)
 * 4) The "not-main image" is great. -- Xd 18:56, March 9, 2010 (UTC)
 * 5) This thing needs ACvotes. It's damned clean. Graestan ( Talk ) 05:10, March 11, 2010 (UTC)
 * 6)  Grunny  ( Talk ) 23:16, March 11, 2010 (UTC)
 * 7)  CC7567  (talk) 05:34, March 12, 2010 (UTC)
 * 8) Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 20:13, March 12, 2010 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) Soresu
 * 2) * the Outer Rim world of Korriban fell back into the control of the Sith. Fell back? I suggest removing, since you haven't established that it used to belong to the Sith yet.
 * 3) **Didn't remove, but I gave it context. See if that's satisfactory.
 * 4) * Following the Empire's defeat in the war, the surviving Sith abandoned Korriban and fled into the Unknown Regions. Following the Jedi Civil War, Following is repetitive.
 * 5) **Addressed.
 * 6) * One such location was Korriban. You should link this more clearly to the previous paragraph than "such", especially since you start a new section. SoresuMakashi ( Everything I tell you is a lie  the truth  ) 22:34, March 1, 2010 (UTC)
 * 7) **Done. Thanks for the review.  Darth Trayus ( Trayus Academy ) 01:24, March 2, 2010 (UTC)
 * 8) For starters, a date is given in the infobox, but not mentioned anywhere in the article.  Graestan ( Talk ) 01:03, March 8, 2010 (UTC)
 * 9) *Added.
 * 10) **Intro wouldn't be a bad idea, either, considering the intro is supposed to sum up the most important facts. And please sign your posts. It says this in the edit window. Graestan ( Talk ) 13:49, March 8, 2010 (UTC)
 * 11) ***It's in there now. Darth Trayus ( Trayus Academy ) 22:21, March 8, 2010 (UTC)
 * 12) Graestan: You're going to find some -type stuff in here, but I am merely trying to highlight some errors, nothing more:
 * 13) * I don't understand how this is so: "Korriban was the ancestral homeworld of the Sith Order and its Empire, and so became an early target for the Imperial forces upon their return to the known galaxy." How does it make it easy? I understand likely, but not easy.
 * 14) **I'm not seeing "easy" anywhere. Please explain. Darth Trayus ( Trayus Academy ) 22:11, March 10, 2010 (UTC)
 * 15) ***I can't read. Graestan ( Talk ) 04:37, March 11, 2010 (UTC)
 * 16) * Was not Korriban the homeworld of the Sith species? That deserves a mention. As it stands, it reads like the Sith Empire, whether or not it included genetic Sith, chose Korriban as a homeworld.
 * 17) **Added in the body. I left it out of the intro because it seems extremely irrelevant for a section meant for condensed info. Darth Trayus ( Trayus Academy ) 22:11, March 10, 2010 (UTC)
 * 18) * Context is needed for the "Jedi Civil War," if even a mention is necessary of it. A timeframe would work just as well. Or perhaps a mention that another Sith Empire had occupied and utilized Korriban. Two had, really. This of course would require more context in the next sentence, to avoid confusion about which Sith Empire.
 * 19) **Done.
 * 20) * Please punctuate complete thought in image caption.
 * 21) **Done this little thing, if Trayus doesn't mind. -- Xd 15:07, March 10, 2010 (UTC)
 * 22) ***Thank you very much, Xd. Darth Trayus ( Trayus Academy ) 22:11, March 10, 2010 (UTC)
 * 23) * Don't you think that your article about the Tingel Arm theater should at least be pipelinked?
 * 24) **My apologies, I thought I had. Darth Trayus ( Trayus Academy ) 22:11, March 10, 2010 (UTC)
 * 25) * The Cold War is mentioned in an image caption, and nowhere else, with zero context. Please provide some in the article somewhere. Ideally, more description of the conflict in which Korriban's fall takes place. It comes across as a pretty hazy situation. Please clarify.
 * 26) **There's no image caption that mentions the Cold War. I'm assuming you mean the quote attribution, and if so, then I've removed the mention, as it's not really necessary and apparently misleading. Darth Trayus ( Trayus Academy ) 22:11, March 10, 2010 (UTC)
 * 27) * These clauses are pretty much redundant; please merge: "turned the dry and arid world into a bastion for the training and education of Sith" and "reestablished the Korriban Sith Academy and dedicated it to the cultivation of a new generation of Sith who could continue the fight against the Republic." Was this a word-count maneuver?
 * 28) **No, it was not a word-cout maneuver. If you check the count, it's more than long enough to qualify for GA, with or without the statement. And I could care less about getting more words in&mdash;I've written enough articles to be past that. It was meant for clarification. The first statement states what they were going to use the planet for, and the second states how they were going to do it. Doesn't seem redundant to me. If they contained the same information, then I'd agree. Darth Trayus ( Trayus Academy ) 22:11, March 10, 2010 (UTC)
 * 29) ***The former is a more vague way of saying the latter, really. Sorry about the word-count comment. Someone being brusque with me on a different nomination further up the page ruined my mood. Graestan ( Talk ) 04:39, March 11, 2010 (UTC)
 * 30) ****No worries, and you're right. I've combined the sentences, so it's been addressed, hopefully. Darth Trayus ( Trayus Academy ) 05:01, March 11, 2010 (UTC)
 * 31) *Lance Henriksen's really let himself go. :P Graestan ( Talk ) 14:42, March 10, 2010 (UTC)
 * 32) **So true. Darth Trayus ( Trayus Academy ) 22:11, March 10, 2010 (UTC)

Comments


 * I imagine this one will require some updating when the actual game is released, but who knows when that will be. Not for a while, so for now, it's stable. Darth Trayus ( Trayus Academy ) 03:40, March 1, 2010 (UTC)