Wookieepedia:Good article nominations/Vischera


 * ''The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a good article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Vischera

 * Nominated by: Jinzler 12:40, 18 July 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: a typical evil Imperial

(3 ACs/2 Users/5 Total)
Support
 * 1) SoresuMakashi ( Everything I tell you is a lie  the truth  ) 12:31, 19 July 2009 (UTC)
 * 2)  CC7567  (talk) 01:09, 25 July 2009 (UTC)
 * 3) &mdash;Master Jonathan(Jedi Council Chambers) 22:45, 26 July 2009 (UTC)
 * 4) Toprawa and Ralltiir 21:32, 3 August 2009 (UTC)
 * 5)  Grunny  ( Talk ) 02:46, 4 August 2009 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) Soresu
 * 2) * Maybe mention that he was partially insane in the intro.
 * 3) **Mentioned --Jinzler 12:23, 19 July 2009 (UTC)
 * 4) * After months of research, Vischera finally succeeded in creating two fully obedient Felucians. He named them Hagark and Kargrek and after after is repetitive.
 * 5) **Fixed --Jinzler 12:23, 19 July 2009 (UTC)
 * 6) * A little context on the Resistance.
 * 7) **Added --Jinzler 12:23, 19 July 2009 (UTC)
 * 8) * waited in the facility’s command center to confront them, as the agents would have to pass through it if they were to escape from the prison. He waited with his Felucian bodyguards waited is repetitive.
 * 9) **Fixed --Jinzler 12:23, 19 July 2009 (UTC)
 * 10) * making him very dangerous. Vischera was cruel and sadistic, making him well suited for Imperial service. Making is repetitive. SoresuMakashi ( Everything I tell you is a lie  the truth  ) 23:38, 18 July 2009 (UTC)
 * 11) **Fixed --Jinzler 12:23, 19 July 2009 (UTC)
 * 12) The clone
 * 13) * "Vischera continued to perfect his alterations on the Felucians and kept alive subjects": it's unclear whether "alive" is an adjective pertaining to "subjects", or whether it's a unit with the verb as "kept alive", as in "keep him alive". Please try to reword for clarity.
 * 14) **Reworded --Jinzler 18:25, 22 July 2009 (UTC)
 * 15) * "which could contracted by Felucian children": please check; this isn't making sense.
 * 16) **Oops.. it is fixed --Jinzler 18:25, 22 July 2009 (UTC)
 * 17) * Can you provide more reasoning for his insanity and/or connect it more to the events? Otherwise, it's rather POV-oriented.  CC7567  (talk) 23:03, 21 July 2009 (UTC)
 * 18) **Done in P&T. Do you want me to do this in the intro as well? --Jinzler 18:25, 22 July 2009 (UTC)
 * 19) ***I still can't see your reasoning as to why he's insane. There needs to be evidence for his insanity, not reasons why he became insane.  CC7567  (talk) 22:47, 22 July 2009 (UTC)
 * 20) ****I not sure if I can do this, as the source has limited information, but does call him "demented", which according to my thesaurus, means insane. His experiments could perhaps be construed as evidence of this, but the source does not directly state that he carried out the experiments because of his insanity --Jinzler 08:37, 24 July 2009 (UTC)
 * 21) *****They're ever-so-slightly different, but I'll give you the benefit of the doubt.  CC7567  (talk) 01:09, 25 July 2009 (UTC)
 * 22) From the Council Chambers:
 * 23) * "A group of Resistance agents were dispatched to free Varth, and they infiltrated the Felucian prison and freed the Admiral.": "Free" is repetitive.
 * 24) **Fixed --Jinzler 18:07, 26 July 2009 (UTC)
 * 25) *Looks good otherwise. &mdash;Master Jonathan(Jedi Council Chambers) 19:17, 25 July 2009 (UTC)
 * 26) **Thanks for your review --Jinzler 18:07, 26 July 2009 (UTC)
 * 27) Toprawa:
 * 28) * My only objection concerns the P/T. Saying his cruelty made him well suited for Imperial service is kind of POV. However, if the source literally says this, it's good to go: "he was cruel and sadistic, making him very dangerous and well-suited for Imperial service" Toprawa and Ralltiir 22:11, 26 July 2009 (UTC)
 * 29) **I admit that this does sound very POVish, but the source does say it --Jinzler 20:32, 30 July 2009 (UTC)

Comments
 * No quotes, unfortunately Jinzler 12:40, 18 July 2009 (UTC)