Wookieepedia:Good article nominations/Daimlo

Daimlo

 * Nominated by:OtterSurf (talk) 22:04, November 28, 2018 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments:

AnilSerifoglu

 * The infobox's sentience parameter is empty. It should also be mentioned in the article body itself, and the word "sentient" in the intro should be pipelinked to sentience.
 * Duplicate references
 * The article is inconsistent about the use of quotation mark for "Scorch" Zanales.
 * The infobox has a link to a redirect page: Scorch Zanales
 * I also fixed another redirect page, Legends, in the article. I really recommend turning the "Highlight all redirects orange." gagdet on from the Preferences for your future nominations, it comes in handy. ;) TanDivoInsignia-SenateMurders.svg  Anıl Şerifoğlu  (talk) 10:24, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * The article needs some linking, such as Podracer (profession)/Legends, Podracer/Legends, Pilot/Legends, Color/Legends etc.
 * I've added a few more links if you don't mind, and fixed a few links that were pipelinked to canon articles. TanDivoInsignia-SenateMurders.svg  Anıl Şerifoğlu  (talk) 10:24, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Is there another image available for the species? The one in the body is simply a resized version of the infobox image.
 * The image caption shouldn't have a full stop per the Layout Guide. TanDivoInsignia-SenateMurders.svg  Anıl Şerifoğlu  (talk) 05:52, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * All of the aforementioned concerns have been dealt with. Some schoolboy errors were made, I'll admit. I also added a new source. There is no other picture of a Daimlo anywhere, so I worked with what there is. OtterSurf (talk) 08:51, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Eye and skin color info are infobox-exclusive. PS: I've removed the "white" from the eye color parameter as it looks like a human eye, so no need to add sclera color. TanDivoInsignia-SenateMurders.svg  Anıl Şerifoğlu  (talk) 10:24, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Just wanted to let you know that this one is still here. TanDivoInsignia-SenateMurders.svg  Anıl Şerifoğlu  (talk) 10:52, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Since it's an article about a species, I think you should mention that Zanales was male somewhere in the article. TanDivoInsignia-SenateMurders.svg  Anıl Şerifoğlu  (talk) 10:24, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * I don't think the last sentence of the BTS is relevant to this article. TanDivoInsignia-SenateMurders.svg  Anıl Şerifoğlu  (talk) 10:28, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Done and done. OtterSurf (talk) 10:41, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Does Star Wars: Racer Revenge: Prima's Official Strategy Guide explicitly say it's 24 BBY, or say something like "... years before/after ..." If it's the latter, you'll need an additional reference note. TanDivoInsignia-SenateMurders.svg  Anıl Şerifoğlu  (talk) 10:52, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * The intro to Racer Revenge specifically states that it takes place eight years after EP1, meaning it's 24 BBY. I've corrected the reference. OtterSurf (talk) 11:12, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Sorry to interject here, but you still need a manual reference note then that explains how, according to some source, Episode I is set in 32 BBY and how the game is set eight years after that, and therefore in 24 BBY.  Imperators II (Talk) 11:32, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Added. OtterSurf (talk) 12:43, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * " according to some source, Episode I is set in 32 BBY". Please specify this source in the reference note.  Imperators II (Talk) 12:49, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Sorted. OtterSurf (talk) 13:36, November 29, 2018 (UTC)

Imp

 * The fact that Daimlo is temperate is intro-exclusive.  Imperators II (Talk) 11:03, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Done. OtterSurf (talk) 11:45, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Can Daimla's location in the Kallea sector really be sourced to the video game?  Imperators II (Talk) 11:03, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * No, it's the Essential Atlas companion. I've corrected it. OtterSurf (talk) 11:15, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * You can't source the fact that the species evolved to sentience on Daimla to the Online Companion, nor the fact that there actually existed a world called Daimla. Those need to be referenced to some of the other sources.  Imperators II (Talk) 11:22, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Done. OtterSurf (talk) 11:45, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Is this claim supported by the listed source, or is it just extrapolation from the fact that there was a Daimlo company that produced a Podracer? "Daimlo society was well aware of Podracing,"?  Imperators II (Talk) 11:03, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Extrapolation. Maybe "well" aware is too strong. I'll correct that. OtterSurf (talk) 11:17, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * My point is that you should not extrapolate it at all. Just state that there was this company, Daimlo Engineering, that did stuff.  Imperators II (Talk) 11:22, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Got it. OtterSurf (talk) 11:25, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * "At least one Daimlo company" is still worded too speculatively. This conveys the supposed possibility of more Daimlo companies producing Podracers, when there's really no need for that. Just keep it simple by outright naming the company.  Imperators II (Talk) 11:50, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * I'll get right on that. OtterSurf (talk) 11:52, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * The last sentence of BTS is just repeating information present in the Sources list, and so should be cut.  Imperators II (Talk) 11:03, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Done. OtterSurf (talk) 11:19, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * No, the sentence is still there.  Imperators II (Talk) 11:27, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Could you clarify that? OtterSurf (talk) 13:39, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Well, my original objection remains unchanged: the last sentence of BTS should be cut.  Imperators II (Talk) 13:44, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Alright, done. OtterSurf (talk) 13:52, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * I think you should reword BTS to be clearer about the chronology of the species' appearance. The way I understand it, the species first appeared in the game, and was subsequently identified by the game guide.  Imperators II (Talk) 11:03, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Done. OtterSurf (talk) 11:26, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Please reference the BTS correctly.  Imperators II (Talk) 11:28, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * This is the only outstanding point right now; can you clarify? OtterSurf (talk) 12:22, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * First off, this is definitely not the only outstanding point right now, see all my other objections, both above and below this one, and also the one in Anil's subsection above. Second, the fact that Daimlos first appeared in the game should be referenced to the game itself, not the guide.  Imperators II (Talk) 12:26, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Done. OtterSurf (talk) 12:43, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * I'd like to see a contextual qualifier for Euceron and Gamorr.  Imperators II (Talk) 11:03, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Please explain. OtterSurf (talk) 11:41, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * "the [insert region] planet Euceron" would do. Also please provide a region for Daimla.  Imperators II (Talk) 11:43, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Done. OtterSurf (talk) 11:52, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Again, Dangerous Games does not place Euceron in the Mid Rim, so you need a separate reference for that.  Imperators II (Talk) 12:09, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Oh, duh! Of course. Doing that. OtterSurf (talk) 12:18, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Again, you're referencing all the stuff about Zanales to The Essential Atlas.  Imperators II (Talk) 12:28, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Not sure of any other source which would be useful there. I don't think Euceron's placement is referenced anywhere else. OtterSurf (talk) 12:43, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * I've fixed this for you.  Imperators II (Talk) 12:49, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Cheers. OtterSurf (talk) 13:04, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Similarly, is "Daimlos were well known in the galaxy," also extrapolated from the fact that Skywalker recognized one Daimlo as such?  Imperators II (Talk) 11:04, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Corrected. OtterSurf (talk) 11:20, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * The "Daimlos in the galaxy" section should be restructured somewhat. First, you mention the Galactic Games and the Hutt Championships, and then you seem to go into a bit of detail on the Gamorr course, and then into much more detail on the Championships again. I think you should move the initial mention of the Championships to its appropriate place, and see if it can be made into a separate paragraph. The Skywalker paragraph is only one sentence long and therefore should be incorporated earlier in the first paragraph.  Imperators II (Talk) 11:26, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Trimmed. TBH, I think the further information would be more appropriate for The Zanales page itself, so I cut it from this page. OtterSurf (talk) 11:39, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Wise.  Imperators II (Talk) 12:27, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * You have infobox-exclusive color information.  Imperators II (Talk) 11:30, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Fixed. OtterSurf (talk) 11:39, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Unsourced item in infobox.  Imperators II (Talk) 11:30, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Fixed. OtterSurf (talk) 11:37, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * The structure of "Society and culture" feels a bit off. First you should talk about the "fundamental," "physical" aspects of the culture, i.e., the rituals. Then you should talk about the languages spoken by members of the species, and only then you should mention Daimlo Engineering, which (correct me if I'm wrong) is only known to share its name with the species, not necessarily to be founded or run by them.  Imperators II (Talk) 11:55, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Working on it. OtterSurf (talk) 11:59, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Done. OtterSurf (talk) 12:13, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * I don't believe there's any reason here to reference the languages and Zanales' name to different sources in the infobox and body.  Imperators II (Talk) 11:55, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Working on it. OtterSurf (talk) 11:59, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Done. OtterSurf (talk) 12:13, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Please provide context for Hutt Championships.  Imperators II (Talk) 12:24, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Done. I also added the date for the Galactic Games. OtterSurf (talk) 12:37, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * That's good, but the date is not mentioned in the novel and therefore needs a separate date reference. Please see all the above objections.  Imperators II (Talk) 12:42, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Done. OtterSurf (talk) 13:05, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * The CSWE timeline doesn't mention either 26 BBY or Euceron Galactic Games.  Imperators II (Talk) 13:10, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * I'm working on an alternate source. If I can't find one, I'll have to remove 26 BBY. OtterSurf (talk) 13:21, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * The Essential Reader's Companion places the events of Dangerous Games in 27 BBY.  Imperators II (Talk) 13:38, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Solid. Thanks. OtterSurf (talk) 13:45, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Right now, "Biology and appearance" makes it sound like only the skin on Daimlos' heads was gray.  Imperators II (Talk) 12:24, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * I am unsure if Zanales' entire torso is clothed or if his skin in that region is indeed pink, but I've corrected it nonetheless. OtterSurf (talk) 12:31, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Can it be specified in "Daimlos in the galaxy" that Zanales' homeworld was Daimla?  Imperators II (Talk) 14:02, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * I already mentioned that Zanales excelled in the rituals on his homeworld, but sure. Done. OtterSurf (talk) 14:06, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * The prior wording just didn't connect Daimla, which had rituals, with Zanales' homeworld, which also had rituals. I've sourced it to the Racer Revenge guide, since I assume it is stated there.  Imperators II (Talk) 14:10, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Great. It's also stated outright on the Starwars.com article if that helps. OtterSurf (talk) 14:16, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * The StarWars.com article doesn't identify Daimla by name.  Imperators II (Talk) 14:18, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Alright, everything sourced to the Podracers blog article should be reworded to stay closer to the source:
 * "Daimlos had strict cultural traditions" &mdash; this is entirely your own extrapolation and should be cut.  Imperators II (Talk) 14:18, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * "one year-long coming-of-age ritual" &mdash; we don't know if there were several rituals, so you shouldn't frame the wording as if there were.  Imperators II (Talk) 14:18, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * The article doesn't say that "unpredictable tactics while Podracing" helped gain Zanales any popularity. Neither does it say that about "proficiency in smashing into opponents".  Imperators II (Talk) 14:18, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * This remains unaddressed.  Imperators II (Talk) 14:43, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * No, I took care of it. OtterSurf (talk) 15:02, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * No, you didn't. Please take the time to read the source article again. It says Zanales was popular with crowds, and that he was unpredictable and proficient in beating up enemies. It doesn't say the latter was the cause of the former.  Imperators II (Talk) 15:10, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * You should specify Daimlos had "skullplates," which is more specific than "head plates." If no other source supports the use of this specific term, reference it accordingly.  Imperators II (Talk) 14:18, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * All taken care of! I reworded some sections to be closer to the original article. OtterSurf (talk) 14:29, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * See above. Also, "were undoubtedly factors in this status" is POV-ish. In addition, use of the pronoun "this" kind of runs counter to our past tense requirement, see what you can do about rewording it.  Imperators II (Talk) 14:43, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Done. OtterSurf (talk) 14:59, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * The article needs to be updated with information from The Complete Star Wars Encyclopedia. The entry for "Zanales, Scorch" on p. 367 of Volume III uses "Daimlos" for both singular and plural forms of the species' name. It also says that Zanales and the other young Daimlos participating in the contest used both their skullplates and their horns.  Imperators II (Talk) 14:43, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Done. From other sources I've read, Daimlo is the correct singular term. OtterSurf (talk) 14:59, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Please familiarize yourself with CSWECite and implement it, both in referencing and in Sources. I think the misspelling should be noted in the BTS and in Sources. Also make sure Daimlos exists as a redirect to Daimlo.  Imperators II (Talk) 15:10, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * In connection to the previous objection, I think that a "History" section is warranted here, which would talk about how Zanales participated in the Daimlo contest and was actually elevated to hero status, which is mentioned both by CSWE and the SW.com article.  Imperators II (Talk) 14:43, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * If that's the case, wouldn't simply renaming the "Daimlos in the galaxy" section be sufficient? I mean, it's not like there's much info on actual Daimlo impact on the galaxy at large. OtterSurf (talk) 14:59, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * You know what, scratch that. I don't think it's necessary. I have integrated Zanales' hero status, however. OtterSurf (talk) 15:04, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * Right now, you're just mentioning Zanales' exploits on Daimla as a footnote to his Podracing career, but what I'm saying is that it's significant enough to the species on Daimla to warrant a separate History section for that. Our Layout Guide supports this: "History deals with the major events in the history of the species. This includes such events as wars, discovery by the galactic community, and other important epochs." I'd say being considered a hero is rather important.  Imperators II (Talk) 15:13, November 29, 2018 (UTC)
 * And no, just renaming "Daimlos in the galaxy" would not be "sufficient" since that section talks about Zanales being a popular racer across the galaxy.  Imperators II (Talk) 15:15, November 29, 2018 (UTC)