Wookieepedia:Featured article nominations/Inexpugnable-class tactical command ship


 * ''The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a featured article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Inexpugnable-class tactical command ship

 * Nominated by:Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 18:26, October 28, 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: My first FAN! Done under the auspices of the KOTOR Wookieeproject.

(5 Inqs/3 Users/8 Total)
Support
 * 1) Very impressive work, Taral.--Jedi Kasra (comlink) 16:51, November 23, 2009 (UTC)
 * 2) Nicely done.  Nayayen ... TALK  15:00, December 30, 2009 (UTC)
 * 3) Your first is always cool.  Chack Jadson  (Talk)  20:20, February 1, 2010 (UTC)
 * 4)  CC7567  (talk) 21:15, February 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 5) Good work. Xd  17:45, February 19, 2010 (UTC)
 * 6) Nice work.  Jonjedigrandmaster  Jedi symbol.svg ( We seed the stars ) 19:11, March 19, 2010 (UTC)
 * 7) Cylka  -talk- 19:08, March 29, 2010 (UTC)
 * 8) A finely-tuned finished product. Good work, Taral. Toprawa and Ralltiir 17:23, March 30, 2010 (UTC)

Object Comments
 * 1) A quick glance, more to come&hellip;
 * 2) * I took a quick glance at the article, and I immediately noticed that in the intro, there are numerous references. These are not necessary, please omit them.
 * 3) **Removed the references from the intro. I noticed that a lot of FAs didn't have intro references, but wasn't going to assume that it was a rule. Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 19:20, October 28, 2009 (UTC)
 * 4) * The Citeweb template should be used for most external references, such as reference 15. Here's a list of the templates.
 * 5) **Used Cite Web to source the online dictionary, but also used tags, because otherwise it wasn't going down to the Notes and references section (I assumed it was automatic, like the ref tags). Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 19:20, October 28, 2009 (UTC)
 * 6) ***Yeah, I assumed that at one time, as well. Good job.--Jedi Kasra (comlink) 19:25, October 28, 2009 (UTC)
 * 7) *More later. I like what I see, though&hellip;--Jedi Kasra (comlink) 18:52, October 28, 2009 (UTC)
 * 8) Nayayen
 * 9) * I'm seeing quite a bit of info exclusive to the intro. "...at 3,100 meters long...", for example, should also be in the main body.
 * 10) **I've added the diameter of the ship into the Dimensions section. Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 00:26, October 29, 2009 (UTC)
 * 11) * This is the same with the infobox. I don't see any mention of the price in the main body.
 * 12) **I've added the price into the history, and also added crew complement, consumables, and cargo capacity to the Complement. Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 00:26, October 29, 2009 (UTC)
 * 13) * There is a LOT of overlinking throughout. Please go through the whole article and make sure that if something is linked, it is linked only ONCE in the intro, ONCE in the infobox, ONCE in each image caption and ONCE in the main body. Of course, if it only occurs in the main body then it doesn't need to be linked in the intro.
 * 14) **Went through the article, I think I found most of the overlinking. Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  <font color=#008000>-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 00:26, October 29, 2009 (UTC)
 * 15) ***You've managed to get most of it, I got those few that you missed. Nayayen [[Image:Old Republic military symbol.png|18px]](talk) 21:21, October 29, 2009 (UTC)
 * 16) * There is a wealth of information on Faraway Press that isn't in the article. The Bts would benefit greatly from this. You also should reference these as "John Jackson Miller's production notes for issue XX".
 * 17) **Found the production notes, and added elements about the Vanjervalis Chain from issue 31, and other issues that gave details the origin of the Inexies' names. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  <font color=#008000>-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 00:26, October 29, 2009 (UTC)
 * 18) * I see no mention of the fact that Haazen could control the Vanjervalis chain because he bought the company.
 * 19) **Added. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  <font color=#008000>-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 00:26, October 29, 2009 (UTC)
 * 20) * The history is not at all comprehensive enough, it is GA standard at best. Please look at a current ship class FA like TIE/sh shuttle for the sort of detail required. You may also find this GA helpful also.
 * 21) **I've tried adding some more. Will need to re-evaluate.  I've been comparing it to the TIE/sh, whose history details mostly just events in which TIE shuttles took place.  This history may be more detailed than it in some ways, but less detailed in other ways.  Additional advice on this front would be greatly appreciated. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  <font color=#008000>-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 00:26, October 29, 2009 (UTC)
 * 22) ***You're looking almost to detail the history of the ships of this class to the degree that it is in the intro for their own articles (of course, those articles aren't comprehensive so I'm not suggesting you do that). First, The Battle of Serroco could do with some more info (mainly from No.15), specific to Inexpugnables of course. Just more than a sentence at least. Secondly, some mention of the escape from Courageous in No.17 would be good. Finally, more detail of what happened with Swiftsure over Coruscant in No.31 as well. Just some more info that generally details the serving history of the class. Things along the line of those three points above should be ideal. I'll look through the article in detail after you've added this info. Nayayen [[Image:Old Republic military symbol.png|18px]](talk) 21:45, October 29, 2009 (UTC)
 * 23) ****Thanks for the advice, and thanks for the help with the links, and I'll do as you suggest for the History. I actually have a funeral to attend this weekend out of town, so I won't be able to do much till Sunday (don't think I've abandoned it!).  So I shall add all this extra info on Sunday/Monday.  Will message you when I've put in those extras.  Thanks for your help and understanding! <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  <font color=#008000>-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 00:50, October 30, 2009 (UTC)
 * 24) *****Added significant detail to History, especially on the Battle of Serroco, the escape from Courageous, and the events of Turnabout. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  <font color=#008000>-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 15:34, November 23, 2009 (UTC)
 * 25) ******Now that is what I was looking for. The content is all there now, I'll be going through with a fine-toothed keyboard later. Nayayen [[Image:Old Republic military symbol.png|18px]](talk) 16:25, November 23, 2009 (UTC)
 * 26) *I didn't have to look too hard to find these problems. Don't be disheartened, Taral, but this article needs some major work. I will wait until you finish these to put more objections up, that last one will take a while. Nayayen [[Image:Old Republic military symbol.png|18px]](talk) 22:35, October 28, 2009 (UTC)
 * 27) Nayayen 2.0
 * 28) * Intro: "Often described as a mobile space station at 3,100 meters in diameter, it was one of the largest Republic spacecraft in use at the time." None of this is mentioned in the body and I'm not sure what source it is from.
 * 29) **Done. And FYI it's from the KOTOR Campaign Guide.<font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  <font color=#008000>-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 14:56, December 29, 2009 (UTC)
 * 30) * "...in the first few weeks of the Mandalorian Wars." Again, not mentioned in the body and I'm dubious of how you got it down to weeks.
 * 31) **You're right, it isn't mentioned explicitly in the body, but I do describe how two Inexies were destroyed in the History section, and since the KOTOR comics show the opening shots of the Mandalorian Wars (Vanquo/Taris), the destruction of the Courageous and the Reliance happened within a few weeks of the beginning of the war. So I don't repeat it explicitly, but it is there implicitly.  Though if you feel  a quick mention is warranted, let me know and I'll see what can be done. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  <font color=#008000>-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 14:56, December 29, 2009 (UTC)
 * 32) ***Well actually, now I think about it, the Mandalorian Wars began in 3,976 BBY so it can't possibly be the first few weeks. Try and find a way to reword this differently "early in 3,964 BBY". You'll also need to reword references to the start of the Mandalorian Wars given that the date of the start is said to be 3,976 BBY.  Nayayen ... TALK  19:49, December 29, 2009 (UTC)
 * 33) ****I looked it up, and while the Mandalorian Wars began in 3,976 BBY, the Republic was only invaded at the end of 3,964 BBY (issues 7-8-10, in 3,964 and 3,963 BBY). So I changed it to either not provide the date, or be explicit to the beginning of the Republic's involvement.  Check it out? <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  <font color=#008000>-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 14:33, December 30, 2009 (UTC)
 * 34) * Characteristics: "...with a hollow center" Can you word this a bit better? It makes it sound like some sort of candy right now.
 * 35) **I see what you mean. I went with that it was "disc-shaped, with an opening in the center". <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  <font color=#008000>-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 14:56, December 29, 2009 (UTC)
 * 36) * Role: "...which allowed an Admiral to command a fleet..." I don't believe that it would be only an admiral in command, ie. Captain Karath.
 * 37) **Replaced with "Flag Officer", which just means the officer who commands a fleet from a flagship. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  <font color=#008000>-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 14:56, December 29, 2009 (UTC)
 * 38) * "These ships commanded Republic fleets..." Can you find a different word to use here? "Commanded" doesn't fit.
 * 39) **"Led". <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  <font color=#008000>-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 14:56, December 29, 2009 (UTC)
 * 40) * History: Please refer to people by either their first or last names consistently. You use Karath but also Zayne and Carth. Last names tend to be preferred.
 * 41) **Done. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  <font color=#008000>-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 14:56, December 29, 2009 (UTC)
 * 42) * "..although Karath, Zayne, and Carth were . . . the wall in Zayne's prison cell." This sentence makes it sound as if the three of them dismantled the wall there and then but they didn't, Carrick had used the Force during his incarceration. Also, they gained access to the Deadweight in the Courageous '  hangar bay, you've got it mixed up here.
 * 43) **Re-written. And as for the last part, I meant "Deadweight's landing bay" as in "the landing bay in which Deadweight was parked," not "the landing bay on the Deadweight."  Rewritten to avoid any misinterpretation. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  <font color=#008000>-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 14:56, December 29, 2009 (UTC)
 * 44) * Shortly after this, you finish a sentence with "remnants of the Courageous" and then start the next one with that same wording.
 * 45) **First use revised.<font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  <font color=#008000>-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 14:56, December 29, 2009 (UTC)
 * 46) * "After the Battle of Serroco, they were equipped..." Make it clear what you are referring to here.
 * 47) **Done.<font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  <font color=#008000>-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 14:56, December 29, 2009 (UTC)
 * 48) * The last half of the penultimate paragraph of the History seems like it was copy'n'pasted from an old revision of the intro. Please reword/move/whatever it so that it flows better.
 * 49) **Revised. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  <font color=#008000>-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 14:56, December 29, 2009 (UTC)
 * 50) * "...used it to command the Republic fleet to both Haazen and the Draay Estate." Commanded it to do what?
 * 51) **lol I forgot a word there. "...Republic fleet to fire upon both Haazen and..." <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  <font color=#008000>-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 14:56, December 29, 2009 (UTC)
 * 52) * Bts: "The names of Inexpugnable-class vessels seem to be mostly derived from Earth naval ships." I personally find the Earth reference odd, why not just say "real world"? Also, say that JJM actually did derive the names from real ships.
 * 53) **Done.<font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  <font color=#008000>-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 14:56, December 29, 2009 (UTC)
 * 54) * Finally, what is that image doing in the Sources section? It isn't relevant to the adjacent text at all and therefore should either be moved or gotten rid of.
 * 55) **Removed. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  <font color=#008000>-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 14:56, December 29, 2009 (UTC)
 * 56) *Sorry it took me so long to get around to a final review.  Nayayen ... TALK  20:57, December 21, 2009 (UTC)
 * 57) Two small things:
 * 58) * "Despite its usefulness as a command ship, the Inexpugnable had its weaknesses. Only six Inexpugnable-class ships were manufactured; two of which..." Would it be remiss to change that to "had its weaknesses, and as such, only six..."
 * 59) **Addressed. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 17:52, February 1, 2010 (UTC)
 * 60) * I could be missing something, but why don't you explain all of the names of the vessels that are named after RL ships in the BTS? For example, you don't explain where Swiftsure got its name from?
 * 61) **The names of Swiftsure and Indefatigable (the only two I didn't already address in the BtS final paragraph) were never given firm origins from the John Jackson Miller endnotes. Still, they are named after old Royal Navy ships, and have noted them as such, with a note in the References section that JJM has not confirmed the origins of the ship names. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 17:52, February 1, 2010 (UTC)
 * 62) *Good job.  Chack Jadson  (Talk) 23:02, January 30, 2010 (UTC)
 * 63) **Thank you! <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 17:52, February 1, 2010 (UTC)
 * 64) Attack of the Clone
 * 65) *While I would normally fix most of these myself, I'm going to list all of them so that you can learn what the acceptable standards are.
 * 66) * If an image caption is not a complete sentence, it does not deserve punctuation.
 * 67) **Fixed. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!-
 * 68) * Please somehow balance out the images. Ideally, there should be only once per section or every three paragraphs. Also, please try to standardize your paragraph size&mdash;the article isn't very aesthetically appealing when there are sporadic lengths.
 * 69) **I've tried to balance the pictures better, and balance the length of the paragraphs. Had to move a pic to Behind the Scenes, but it's okay because I mention that ship's appearance in BtS. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!-
 * 70) ***"Standardizing paragraph size" doesn't really mean keeping the currently measly sizes in the Characteristics section.  CC7567  (talk) 20:38, February 9, 2010 (UTC)
 * 71) ****Tried evening out the paragraph lengths in Characteristics. Try it now. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 15:53, February 13, 2010 (UTC)
 * 72) * "A possible auxiliary thruster": this isn't very clear; please clarify.
 * 73) **Tried to clarify, is it better? <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!-
 * 74) ***"with what appeared to be an auxiliary thruster located in between the main four": I'm not so sure that this is much better. It needs to be worded less speculatively, if possible.  CC7567  (talk) 20:38, February 9, 2010 (UTC)
 * 75) ****It is speculation, so I just removed it. It just wasn't clear, per the CG, what that thruster-like structure was. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 13:07, February 10, 2010 (UTC)
 * 76) * Pipelinking such as " Aurek starfighters " makes linking rather overdone; it's perfectly fine to link to articles only when they first appear, as the role of linking is as a supplement, not an attempt to direct the reader to every single related article.
 * 77) **Fixed a few, I think that's most of them. Will check again. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!-
 * 78) * "These ships led Republic fleets throughout the early Mandalorian Wars, including the Battle of Vanquo, the Battle of Serroco, the First Battle of Taris, and in orbit of Coruscant." I'm not really sure how this is relevant enough to be included in the Role section. From the Layout Guide: "Role encompasses the duties the vessel or vehicle type was designed and/or used for. Strengths and weaknesses in application are laid out here, as well." Also, watch the placement of your references; it currently implies that the entire sentence is attributable to all four of those sources, and I'm unsure if that's true or not.
 * 79) **Fixed the Role section. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!-
 * 80) * Going from the section of the LG that I just quoted, please check to see if all of the article's information&mdash;including that of the Characteristics section&mdash;is in the right place.
 * 81) **I'm pretty sure the appropriate data is in Characteristics, Role, and History (now). <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!-
 * 82) ***"This also made them vulnerable to boarding operations and ramming attacks." Are you sure? Please check again.  CC7567  (talk) 20:38, February 9, 2010 (UTC)
 * 83) ****"It had large hangars and a command area located underneath the main superstructure, to the stern. Additional hangar decks were located on the vessel's bow to allow rapid deployment of fighters from multiple levels. This also made them vulnerable to boarding operations and ramming attacks." I'm sorry, but I don't understand how that isn't a characteristic. It had numerous large hangars, which was beneficial, but also created a vulnerability.  I can rephrase to make it one continuous sentence, if that helps.  But if you can explain the concern I'd greatly appreciate it. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 13:07, February 10, 2010 (UTC)
 * 84) *****The vulnerability at least needs to be mentioned in the Role section as a disadvantage. Sorry if I wasn't being clear enough.  CC7567  (talk) 01:45, February 14, 2010 (UTC)
 * 85) ******Moved it to Roles, with a mention of the hangar capacity as being useful for rapid fighter deployment, but having the vulnerabilities as above. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 16:03, February 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 86) *******Please also make sure that you adhere to the MOS's proper italics.  CC7567  (talk) 19:49, February 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 87) ********I think I've corrected the italics (I did notice a few words that were italicized that shouldn't have been). <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 21:08, February 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 88) *I'm going to stop there for now and give you time to work on the article before I continue. I would highly recommend paying attention to linking. Articles are linked once in the infobox, once in the intro, and once in the body of the paragraph&mdash;no less, no more. I've changed what I caught, but you should go through the article and make sure that the linking is impeccable.  CC7567  (talk) 06:37, February 8, 2010 (UTC)
 * 89) **Thanks for the help! Will keep watch for more comments. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 17:37, February 9, 2010 (UTC)
 * 90) * Per the Manual of Style, please use metric units instead of standardized American ones.
 * 91) **The only one I saw was "ton", which is a) metric, b) in the list of measurement units, and c) properly sourced. If I missed another one, please let me know and I'll gladly change it. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 16:03, February 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 92) ***The problem is that "ton" is also an American unit. It would be better if you could either say "metric ton" and leave it there or convert it to kilograms if at all possible to avoid confusion.  CC7567  (talk) 19:49, February 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 93) ****Added "metric". <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 21:08, February 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 94) *****Just so you know, a "ton" refers to both an Imperial and a US measurement (the former 1016 kg, the latter 907 kg). However, "tonne" is the proper term for the metric unit of 1000 kg. I'll let you put it whichever way you prefer. ;)  Nayayen &mdash; TALK  22:46, February 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 95) * Can we get a time marker at the very beginning of the History section?
 * 96) **I'm sorry but I don't understand. There is no source for the earliest origins of the ship class, only tis first appearance in canon, in KOTOR #8.  So, short of re-writing the sentence to have the first appearance at the front, there isn't much I can do (unless I don't understand what you mean by "time market".  Please advise. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 16:03, February 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 97) ***Time "marker," and I'm referring to the possible implementation of such a marker for the Republic's decision that it needed a "tactical command ship to coordinate its large fleets." Even only something like "Prior to the Mandalorian Wars" might help, if it can be said.  CC7567  (talk) 19:49, February 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 98) ****lol sorry for the typo. I've added "Prior to the Republic's involvement in the Mandalorian Wars, the Republic..." at the beginning of History. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 21:08, February 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 99) * "allowing access the Deadweight in the Courageous landing bay": please check this; a word is missing somewhere.
 * 100) **Fixed. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 16:03, February 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 101) * "Mandalore the Ultimate later claimed that his battle-axe was forged from the Courageous hull." I'm not quite sure if this is relevant; please clarify why it is.
 * 102) **Last bit of history involving the starship Courageous. I added another half-sentence to clarify that the ship was taken by the Mandalorians and recycled, and part of the hull was used to make the Mandalore's axe.  It is relevant, but it wasn't well connected. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 16:03, February 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 103) * "specifically so that they might intercept Carrick": who wanted to intercept him? Why?
 * 104) **Added appropriate info. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 16:03, February 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 105) * You can only link to an article once in captions throughout the article where the article is first mentioned. I personally would recommend removing all links in images.
 * 106) **Removed all links from images. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 16:16, February 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 107) * Can we get a little more context on Vindiciation, i.e. whether it was an actual battle, a code word, or something else?
 * 108) **Added a quick half-sentence, defining the Vindication as Haazen's Jedi Covenant insurrection against the Order. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 16:16, February 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 109) * Context on Cassus Fett.
 * 110) **Added a quick line about Fett. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 16:03, February 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 111) * "Fett's fleet fought a brief battle with the Republic": can we get a link to that battle somewhere in this section, preferably where it's first mentioned?
 * 112) **Fixed. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 16:03, February 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 113) * "Upon Admiral Karath being informed of the true nature of the battle": please reword this somehow and use an actual noun instead of a gerund (the -ing word, "being"), as it's currently very choppy.
 * 114) **"When Admiral Karath learned of the ruse and its ultimate goal, he directed Swiftsure fleet to capture..." <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 16:03, February 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 115) ***Is it "the Swiftsure" or simply just "Swiftsure"? Please be consistent throughout the article.  CC7567  (talk) 19:49, February 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 116) ****I went through, and now consistently use "the  " or "the  ". <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 21:08, February 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 117) * Please check all rank capitalization against the Manual of Style.
 * 118) **I found one, but will continue to check for more. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 16:16, February 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 119) * "Only six Inexpugnable-class vessels, including prototypes and production models, were ever manufactured, since problems began cropping up with the design." Is there a reason why this is mentioned so late in the History when it has much more relevance toward the very beginning?
 * 120) **I disagree. It's not a matter of "we built six, but they weren't great so we stopped building them".  I think it's more a "We started building them, but because they weren't great we stopped at six."  That is more appropriate at the end, because it's the final decision of the manufacturing of the ships, presumably after most were destroyed or have had their weaknesses show (if the Republic knew early on that the ships had major weaknesses, then I figure they wouldn't be using them as flagships in a war.) Please clarify if you disagree or have another POV. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 16:03, February 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 121) ***That's fine, then, assuming that the date for this fact isn't known. Thank you for clarifying.  CC7567  (talk) 19:49, February 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 122) * "This different appearance may have been artistic interpretation, or it could be due to the fact that the Swiftsure was a proof-of-concept ship and therefore may have had a slightly different design." Speculation does not belong in articles, so please clarify its inclusion or remove it.
 * 123) **I removed the in-universe speculation about the proof-of-concept idea, but I properly sourced the other idea. Yes, it is technically speculation, but it is founded and sourced.  I can remove the whole paragraph if you like, but then that picture looks out of place, and I feel that that picture is important to the article. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 16:16, February 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 124) *Please continue to watch your linking, as I currently find it the most prominent issue at hand. I will be going through the article again with you to make sure that it's in good shape once you fix all of these.  CC7567  (talk) 01:45, February 14, 2010 (UTC)
 * 125) Toprawa:
 * 126) * Please provide some kind of link--a redlink will suffice--for this battle-axe. It may be pertinent to leave a specific redlink for Mandalore's individual weapon. You know the material better than I do, so make an executive decision here: "Mandalore the Ultimate later claimed that his battle-axe was forged from the Courageous hull."
 * 127) **Added the redlink, will make an article later. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 14:45, March 29, 2010 (UTC)
 * 128) * I feel it would be good to briefly mention which are the remaining vessels here for a quick refresher: "After the Battle of Serroco, the remaining Inexpugnable-class ships were equipped"
 * 129) **I disagree, since we don't know preciesly which Inexies remain. We only know for sure that the Courageous and Reliance were destroyed, and that the Swiftsure and Tremendous were still around.  We assume that the Indefatigable is there, but we don't even know for certain that it was built yet, and the sixth Inexie was never named.  The only evidence we do have for certain is which two were destroyed.  And even if we did know for certain that the others were all in service at that moment, I wouldn't want to say "and the sixth, unnamed one".  If, however, you have an idea that would account for this, please be my guest. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 14:45, March 29, 2010 (UTC)
 * 130) ***That's fine, but I still think it would help to mention the ones we know. I might suggest saying, "the remaining Inexpugnable-class ships, including the Swiftsure and the Tremendous, were equipped..." Toprawa and Ralltiir 20:39, March 29, 2010 (UTC)
 * 131) ****Done. Added "including the Swiftsure, Tremendous, and Indefatigable," <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 17:08, March 30, 2010 (UTC)
 * 132) * This sentence is technically a dangling modifier. Please specify who refitted the vessel with the sensor package: "After refitting the Swiftsure with the Vanjervalis sensor package, that ship was used as a basis for the production model"
 * 133) **"the manufacturers used that ship as a basis for the production model." Fixed. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 14:45, March 29, 2010 (UTC)
 * 134) * Later what year? The only year mentioned remotely near this statement is the year 3,964 BBY two paragraphs earlier. Please specify, and remember to keep your readers fully abreast of what time frame they're dealing with: "Later that year, Karath took the Swiftsure and its task force"
 * 135) **A reference to the year 3,963 BBY was added earlier on, making "later that year" accurate. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 14:45, March 29, 2010 (UTC)
 * 136) * What is the purpose of this planet's location? Is this where Jarael is being held, or whatever the case is? The sentence seems to imply this, but the connection is very vague. Please specify. This is also a good opportunity for a reminder that when writing articles, never assume the reader is familiar with the source material and therefore automatically knows what you're talking about and what is going on. Assume they don't, in fact, know what's going on: "Golliard revealed the position of the planet Osadia to the Republic"
 * 137) **Added reference to Osadia as a Crucible base and where Jarael was held captive. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 14:45, March 29, 2010 (UTC)
 * 138) * The final sentence of the History section mentions specific starship components, namely the Rendili engines of the Trade Federation ships, which the article sources to Episode I. The Episode I film in no way specifies what type of engine these vessels are using. A more specific source is needed here. Toprawa and Ralltiir 22:14, March 26, 2010 (UTC)
 * 139) **Info comes from Incredible Cross-Sections. Reference amended. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 14:45, March 29, 2010 (UTC)
 * 140) Cylka:
 * 141) * It seems to me that the word "command" is used too often in the introduction. I believe that there are at least two instances where it isn't used as part of "command ship."
 * 142) **Changed two of them, one to "lead" instead of command and "fleet flagship" instead of command ship. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 17:49, March 29, 2010 (UTC)
 * 143) * Please describe the Vanjervalis Chain a little. The article really doesn't say what it does, but it's an important part of the ship's systems.
 * 144) **Explanation added. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 17:49, March 29, 2010 (UTC)
 * 145) * Also, please add how the Gauntlet of Kressh the Younger was able to take control of the Vanjervalis Chain.
 * 146) **Restructured the sentence, and now the Gauntlet has mention of its remote controls. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 17:49, March 29, 2010 (UTC)
 * 147) * After refitting the Swiftsure with the Vanjervalis sensor package, the manufacturers used that ship as a basis for the production model - This sentence seems sort of tacked on to the end of the paragraph. Please see if you can move it somewhere else or incorporate it better.
 * 148) **Integrated earlier in the paragraph, stating how Swiftsure  was the first ship with the refit, which became the production model. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 17:49, March 29, 2010 (UTC)
 * 149) *Good job for your first FAN. <span style="font-variant: small-caps; font-family: times, cursive; font-size: 16px"><font color=#008080>Cylka  <span style="font-family: times, cursive; font-size: 13px"><font color=#00A693>-talk- 17:27, March 29, 2010 (UTC)
 * 150) **Thank you! <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 17:49, March 29, 2010 (UTC)


 * I would really recommend removing all of those subheaders and merging all of the info in the Characteristics section under that main header. It doesn't seem like there's enough info on each specific part of the ship to balance the section aesthetically as a whole.  CC7567  (talk) 05:31, November 24, 2009 (UTC)
 * Makes sense. I removed the headers, and it looks better I think.  Worst case scenario we can revert, but it looks better. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  <font color=#008000>-Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 13:22, November 24, 2009 (UTC)
 * As reliable as it is for basic information, I don't think it's good practice to cite Wikipedia as a source. I may be able to find a book citation instead for Indefatigable and Swiftsure. Also, HMS Indefatigable was the ship Horatio Hornblower served in his first book. -LtNOWIS 04:33, February 24, 2010 (UTC)
 * I understand about wikipedia. Fortunately, I only used it to verify the existence of the ships, and not any specific information.  If any INQs object I'll gladly find a different source, but as it stands it's useful for the info I need. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 14:00, February 24, 2010 (UTC)
 * Wikipedia is basically like Wookieepedia: if anyone can edit it, it's not a proper source for information. While the information there is probably correct, I'd recommend that you find a proper source.  CC7567  (talk) 20:44, February 24, 2010 (UTC)
 * Fixed. Found some references to both ships on a website devoted to Ships of the Old Royal Navy. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 13:37, March 1, 2010 (UTC)
 * You might want to mention that the Inexies were given an entry in the CSWE.--Jedi Kasra (comlink) 21:16, March 5, 2010 (UTC)
 * It's not mentioned in the text, but the CSWE is in the Sources section, and is referenced in the Reflist. I'm not sure how adding it in the Bts would work (I think it might look weird actually, especially since most other articles don't have something like that).  If you have a way to make it work, let me know and we'll try, but I'm not so sure that it needs more. <font color=#FF0000>Taral, Dark Lord of the Sith  -Just shy, not antisocial: You can talk to me!- 15:43, March 8, 2010 (UTC)