Wookieepedia:Good article nominations



This page is for the nomination of good articles. This is not a way to showcase the articles of your favorite characters, spaceships, or the like. For a list of good articles, see Category:Wookieepedia good articles.

What is a Good article?
A Good article is an article that adheres to quality standards, but cannot reach FA status due to its limited content.

A Good article has the following attributes.

1. It is well written. In this respect:


 * (a) it has compelling prose, and is readily comprehensible to non-specialist readers;
 * (b) it follows a logical structure, introducing the topic and then grouping together its coverage of related aspects; where appropriate, it contains a succinct lead section summarizing the topic, and the remaining text is organized into a system of hierarchical sections (particularly for longer articles);
 * (c) it follows the Manual of Style, Layout Guide, and all other policies;
 * (d) necessary technical terms or jargon are briefly explained in the article itself, or an active link is provided.

2. It is factually accurate and verifiable. In this respect:


 * (a) it provides references to any and all sources used for its material;
 * (b) sources should be selected in accordance with the guidelines for reliable sources;
 * (c) it contains no elements of original research.

3. It is broad in its coverage, addressing all major aspects of the topic (this requirement is slightly weaker than the "comprehensiveness" required by WP:FA, and allows shorter articles and broad overviews of large topics to be listed);.

4. It follows the neutral point of view policy. In this respect:


 * (a) viewpoints are represented fairly and without bias;
 * (b) all significant points of view are fairly presented, but not asserted, particularly where there are or have been conflicting views on the topic.

5. It is stable, i.e., it does not change significantly from day to day and is not the subject of ongoing edit wars. This does not apply to vandalism and protection or semi-protection as a result of vandalism.

6. It contains images, where possible, to illustrate the topic. In this respect:


 * (a) the images are properly sourced and have succinct and descriptive captions;
 * (b) a lack of images does not in itself prevent an article from achieving Good Article status.

Nomination of Good articles
To nominate an article for Good article status, list it here. Nominated articles must meet all six requirements stated above. If an article has a total of five votes after at least a week since it was nominated (beginning the day of its nomination) and no objections (or the objections have been stricken or overridden), the article will be considered a "Good article" and tagged with the template. The talk page will also be tagged with the GA template. For complete instructions on archiving nominations please see here. Also remember to add GAnom at the top of the article you are nominating.

(+0)
Support
 * 1) Seems to fit the requirements. The prose might be a little watery, but that could easily be remedied. Din&#39;s Fire 997 00:08, 14 April 2008 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) The article and the infobox need to be fully sourced, please.  Greyman  http://images.wikia.com/central/images/9/9c/Jan.png ( Talk ) 20:13, 13 April 2008 (EDT)
 * 2) *How's that? Din&#39;s Fire 997 00:54, 14 April 2008 (UTC)
 * 3) **Per Rule 2(a). It can be confusing if you're not familiar with it, but here is the sourcing page, which provide steps to follow. Greyman  http://images.wikia.com/central/images/9/9c/Jan.png ( Talk ) 01:08, 14 April 2008 (UTC)
 * 4) ***Better? (thanks for the link, btw. This whole process is really expanding my skills, if nothing else) Din&#39;s Fire 997 01:36, 14 April 2008 (UTC)
 * 5) ****Good, I'm glad to hear it! It looks much better, and the only thing you need to source now is this statement, "However, it did not gain notoriety until it was taken as a refuge by rogue Sith Lord Darth Millennial." Otherwise, the sourcing is complete. Greyman  http://images.wikia.com/central/images/9/9c/Jan.png ( Talk ) 01:48, 14 April 2008 (UTC)
 * 6) *****Needed a minor rephrase, but it's sourced now. Din&#39;s Fire 997 01:59, 14 April 2008 (UTC)
 * 7) Toprawa:
 * 8) * Din, right now the article is just too short. These one sentence paragraph haphazardly summarizing events should be fleshed out to the length of paragraphs.
 * 9) * Additionally, the article should be ordered to fit within our Layout Guide. If you go that page and go down to number 11, you'll see how a planet article should be sectioned. I would also recommend you take a look at Agamar, a recently passed Featured Article. That's just how a planet article should be done. You can use that as a model. Toprawa and Ralltiir 04:07, 15 April 2008 (UTC)
 * 10) * In that case, you'll need to add the bit in the intro to the body of the article as well. I can't say never, but an article should almost never have intro material not covered in the body someplace. Once in a blue moon an exception will rear its ugly head, but this is certainly not one of them. Toprawa and Ralltiir 05:27, 16 April 2008 (UTC)
 * 11) **Adressed all of that, I believe. Heck, I'm pretty sure this is technically long enough to be an FA now (not pushing my luck though). If there's anything else, I'll do it - I've come this far. Din&#39;s Fire 997 06:37, 16 April 2008 (UTC)
 * 12) ***I must say, Din, although I haven't read through it yet, I'm impressed. Just how it should look, at any rate. I'll review it soon. :) Toprawa and Ralltiir 15:38, 16 April 2008 (UTC)
 * 13) *Would be good to add a little bit here, to say it was located in Sith Space: " was the third planet in the Dromund system"
 * 14) *Please give a time frame (i.e. year) to give this greater context: "The site of a major battle during the New Sith Wars"
 * 15) *Weasel words like "possibly" and "apparently" are doorways to speculation, which is a big no-no when writing articles. If you can't reword to avoid the "possibly," I would suggest removing that little clause entirely: "for centuries, possibly even millennia"
 * 16) *What, specifically, does "average-sized" mean? In relation to what? Does the source say this, or are you extrapolating this from something? Greater clarification, specification would help here: "Dromund Kaas was an average-sized planet"
 * 17) *Again, "seemed" is one of these weasel words. Something either did or didn't. Write what you know: "Only very durable life-forms seemed to survive long in the swamps"
 * 18) *Please briefly describe who Kaan is here. Don't assume the reader knows who anyone is: "and Kaan's New Sith Empire"
 * 19) *Specify, with years, what these times in history were: "During varying points in history, Dromund Kaas was held by both the Old Sith Empire and Kaan's New Sith Empire."
 * 20) *Again, a year, please: "However, it was effectively abandoned until it became a refuge for rogue Sith Lord Darth Millennial"
 * 21) *Explain what the Rule of Two here is: "Having rejected the Rule of Two"
 * 22) *Year/time frame, please: "until its rediscovery by one Darth Sidious"
 * 23) *This sentence is highly speculative. Please reword to avoid saying "It is believed." Does the source explicitly say someone believed this? If so, who? "It is believed that Yoda may have personally investigated the system, however any such mission would have been known only to the highest ranks of the Jedi, and any records of the project have been lost."
 * 24) *Can we elaborate on this battle? If not, at the very least create an article for this battle, please: "Despite this level of secrecy, the 327th Star Corps would later fight a battle on Dromund Kaas during the Clone Wars"
 * 25) *Can we elaborate on what inscriptions these were: "learned of the planet from ancient inscriptions"
 * 26) *Please provide a date here. I'm almost certain it's 10 ABY: "until Jedi Knight Kyle Katarn learned of the planet from ancient inscriptions."
 * 27) *Calling these things abominations is pretty POV. Please choose a better word: "and battled many Sith abominations"
 * 28) *Please elaborate on what exactly Dark Mara is: "along with the apparition known as Dark Mara"
 * 29) *What, exactly, is an act of faith? "an act of faith in Katarn's heart"
 * 30) *Please reword the beginning of this sentence to avoid starting out with dead construction like "At this." At what? "At this, Katarn was able to overthrow the dark taint of the Temple,"
 * 31) *Not an objection, but a pointer. Linking should be done as followed: Link upon first mention in the intro and once again upon first mention in the body, and then avoid linking something again for the remainder of the article
 * 32) *Timeframes, please: "Built during the original Sith Empire, the Temple was deserted shortly after the Great Hyperspace War"
 * 33) *Who is Seviss Vaa? "the Temple's location eventually fell into the hands of Seviss Vaa"
 * 34) *Please add a little bit to the beginning of the BTS explaining where it first appeared in SW media.
 * 35) *Without checking, I suspect your source list may be out of order. It should be ordered by OOU publication date. Please check.
 * 36) *Overall, not bad, Din. Toprawa and Ralltiir 18:05, 17 April 2008 (UTC)
 * 37) **Adressed a lot of that, but there's a fair amount that simply can't be.
 * 38) **Dates are impossible in many cases. We don't knew when, exactly, any of these battles took place, and, since we don't know when Darth Millennial was even alive saying when he landed is also out.
 * 39) **"Only very durable life-forms seemed to survive long in the swamps" In fact, that is avoiding speculation. The only life-forms we've seen on Kaas are durable, but we can't use a blanket statment here. Hence "seemed." Of course, if "until otherwise proven" is okay, then I'll alter it.
 * 40) **To quote the original source "It's believed that Yoda may have visited the Dromund system." Doesn't say by whom.
 * 41) ** Nothing can be done about the "ancient inscriptions." We don't know when, where, or what they consisted of. It seems I was mistaken. JvS says 9 ABY.
 * 42) **Again, directly from Wizards.com "Kyle Katarn traveled there after learning of the witchworld in ancient inscriptions, battling a host of Sith abominations in the planet's seemingly endless bogs before succumbing to the spell of the dark side of the Force." That's what they're called. Abominations.
 * 43) **Not much can be added about Dark Mara. She was a spirit with a lightsaber. The end. If you can think of a way to add that bit without breaking up the prose, by all means, alter.
 * 44) **Act of faith is a real-world term
 * 45) **Anything else? I admit this is tiring, but darn it, I am getting this bloody thing through if it kills me.Din&#39;s Fire 997 03:25, 18 April 2008 (UTC)
 * 46) From the Bridge of Chack Jadson:
 * 47) * I agree with Toprawa. The article has too many two sentence paragraphs.
 * 48) * Also, check out the layout guie like he suggested. Model the article to fit that, and it will be much improved.  Chack Jadson  (Talk) 21:07, 15 April 2008 (UTC)
 * 49) '''From the Dun Moch lacing the ferocious lighsaber slashes of Xadún:
 * 50) *Opening Quote. Is there something tht refers directly to the planet, rather than a vague swamp refernce?
 * 51) *"Dromund Kaas was the third planet in the Dromund system, and the lasting base of the Prophets of the Dark Side, whose Dark Force Temple contained such power in the the dark side of the Force that most weapons, excluding lightsabers, malfunctioned on its surface." Highly fragmented.
 * 52) *"Vines spread from tree to tree, and ysalamiri clung to some of the higher branches; however, as of 10 ABY, the planet boasted little in the way of native fauna. The majority of creatures to be encountered on Dromund Kaas were either imported, or Sithspawn created by dark Force users. Only very durable life-forms seemed to survive long in the swamps, with predators such as mailocs, vornskrs, and swamp wampas being among the dominant species. Ysalamiri are native to Mykr but the way they are refered to (i.e. before mentioning imported creatures) make appear native.
 * 53) * "During varying points in history" makes no sense.
 * 54) * "However, it was effectively abandoned until it became a refuge for rogue Sith Lord Darth Millennial sometime after 990 BBY." Why was it abandoned?
 * 55) *"It is believed that Yoda may have personally investigated the system, however any such mission would have been known only to the highest ranks of the Jedi, and any records of the project have been lost. Despite this level of secrecy, the 327th Star Corps would later fight a battle on Dromund Kaas during the Clone Wars." Any info as to how this battle came about?
 * 56) * "Abruptly ending the training of his pupil, Mara Jade, Katarn located the system and battled many Sith abominations to reach the Dark Force Temple, where he succumbed to the temptations of the dark side." how? did the Prophets turn him? did he believe in it's power over the light instead? Elaborate please.
 * 57) * "After he fell out of contact, Jade began to worry for the Jedi." "The Jedi" usually refers to the order as a whole. recommend replacing with something like 'mentor'.
 * 58) *"Setting out for Dromond Kaas herself, Jade worked her way through both local monsters and many Sith traps, eventually finding Katarn's shuttle, and later the Temple itself." You never mention traps before. What traps are they? describe them.
 * 59) * "After dueling for a time, Jade lowered her weapon in surrender—an act of faith in Katarn's heart." 'Dueling for a time' is unencyclopaedic. please revise.
 * 60) *"Seeing this display, Katarn realize that he could not kill his own friend and ally, and was able to overthrow the dark taint of the Temple, and free himself from the clutches of the dark side, fleeing the planet with Jade.[" Fragmented sentence. either revise to remove some of the 'and's or break it down.
 * 61) *"After enraging Sidious with one of his prophecies, Kadann pulled the Dark Force off of Dromund Kaas, relocating to Bosthirda. The planet would then remain, for the most part, deserted." For the most part? did some of the Prophets remain?
 * 62) *You often refer Dromund Kaas as an abandoned world. Only the temple settlements are abandoned; the rest of the world appears lush with vegetation and fauna.
 * 63) * " It can therefore be assumed that the mention of Thurra was a typo." Avoid assuming things as much as possible. It is enough that attention is draw to two systems being specified, so remove this sentence.
 * 64) * Rather shaky, on the whole. Darth Xadún ( Consult the Holocron ) 12:37, 3 June 2008 (UTC)

Comments

Well, seeing that no one has changed their vote to a positive one (even though I have addressed almost every addressable concern) I will assume that interest has waned (not surprising given recent policy battles regarding GA status) and will wait for the inevitable failure of this nomination. After a cool-down period, I intend to re-nominate. In any case, at least I’ve learned a bit from this endeavor. Cheers. Din&#39;s Fire 997 01:03, 7 May 2008 (UTC)

(+1)
Support
 * 1) I've done a good amount of work on this article. A lot of referencing. -- Joe Butler (Obi Maul12)   talk 04:43, 11 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 2) Inspected via AIM and all my quarrels have been taken care of. --Squishy Vic (discussion) (contributions) 05:13, 11 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 3) Sure, well sourced, good expansion Enochf 17:56, 11 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 4) Certified by the board of Ataru. Atarumaster88  [[Image:Jedi_Order.svg|20px]] ( Talk page ) 03:27, 12 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 5) My objections have been satisfied. 03:28, 12 May 2008 (UTC)

Oppose Comments
 * 1) Toprawa:
 * 2) * Kinda don't know where to start with this one, so I'll begin by saying let's not just vote on articles because we like the concept of the article itself.
 * 3) * That being said, this isn't even an article. It's a stub with sourcing.
 * 4) **Much better! Now we have an article on our hands. :) Toprawa and Ralltiir 06:32, 11 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 5) * The intro needs to be expanded.
 * 6) **--It's been expanded. -- Joe Butler (Obi Maul12)   talk
 * 7) * The first paragraph of the history section isn't sourced.
 * 8) **--Its sourced now. -- Joe Butler (Obi Maul12)   talk
 * 9) * There really shouldn't be any information restrictive to the infobox.
 * 10) **--I believe all info in the infobox is included within the article. (excluding eras, of course)
 * 11) * There's no section describing the droid model.
 * 12) ** --Created. -- Joe Butler (Obi Maul12)   talk
 * 13) * There's no BTS.
 * 14) **--Now there is. -- Joe Butler (Obi Maul12)   talk
 * 15) * Your source list doesn't appropriately match the Notes and references. Toprawa and Ralltiir 05:27, 11 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 16) **--I've fixed that. -- Joe Butler (Obi Maul12)   talk
 * 17) * The first section should be titled "Characteristics"
 * 18) **(Done.) -- Joe Butler (Obi Maul12)   talk
 * 19) * Now you don't have a "History" section
 * 20) **(Added.)-- Joe Butler (Obi Maul12)   talk
 * 21) * "Design flaws" should be a subsection of the new "Characteristics" section, not its own section
 * 22) **(Done.) -- Joe Butler (Obi Maul12)   talk
 * 23) * Introduction should not be sourced in this case. Intro should not have any info not also found in the article body.
 * 24) **(Fixed.)-- Joe Butler (Obi Maul12)   talk
 * 25) * I'm not sure why you sourced the non-canon appearances. Toprawa and Ralltiir 17:59, 12 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 26) **(All of your quarrels listed have been fixed.) -- Joe Butler (Obi Maul12)   talk
 * 27) *One of your appearances or sources needs to indicate when the droid was first identified as the "Q-series" droideka.
 * 28) **I'm not sure I know what you mean. In the article, the "Q-series" title for the droideka is first mentioned in the intro, where I can't source it. Are you asking which source first came out with the Q-series and dubbed it so?-- Joe Butler (Obi Maul12)   talk 00:47, 20 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 29) ***A tag is there. --  Joe Butler (Obi Maul12)   talk 11:04, 20 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 30) ****You need a tag. Toprawa and Ralltiir 18:25, 30 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 31) *Also, please format your responses as they appear above so as to not interfere with other users' comments. Toprawa and Ralltiir 23:48, 16 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 32) As Tope has said, this surely needs major expansion before GA ready. --Eyrezer 06:14, 11 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 33) There are appearances in the source list, and, puzzlingly, things repeated in both lists. Thefourdotelipsis 06:41, 11 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 34) *Is that bad? -- Joe Butler (Obi Maul12)   talk 06:47, 11 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 35) **Quite. I touched it up for you, though. Also, for future reference, sourcebooks, such as RPG materials and books like the Essential Guides and Visual Dictionaries go in the ==Source== field, and novels, comics, books, and video games go in the ==Appearances== field. 15:42, 11 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 36) From Jorrel Fraajic
 * 37) * Are you sure on some of those sources? If Ep. III was its first appearance, how did it appear in Ep. II? Also, I'm almost positive both Lego Star Wars entries aren't accurate; unless it states somewhere in the booklet or Prima guide that they are Q-series, they didn't "technically" make an appearance. I'm pretty sure this applies to many of your sources (FoC, being another one - if it does appear there, let me know).
 * 38) * A lot of this information seems to apply as a general overview of the Droideka, not specifically the Q-series. Correct me if I'm wrong.
 * 39) *Those are the two major ones I see. Sourcing-wise, it's very good. How accurate the sources are, however, could be a different matter. 15:42, 11 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 40) **--The original model of the droideka was very similar to the Q-series droideka, that's why a lot of the info seems to be a general of overview of the droideka. Also, the Prima Official Guide for LEGO Star Wars: The Video Game and the guide for LEGO Star Wars: The Complete Saga both list the droideka model as Q-series. I forgot to source this, and will do it now. Thirdly, it was my mistake adding AotC in the appearances. Lastly, the Q-series droideka was the main droideka model manufactured after the Battle of Coruscant featured in RotS, the source being the novel I recently read, but I also forgot to source this; that's why most appearances are after the time of RotS. Thanks for notifying me. What is FoC, though? --  Joe Butler (Obi Maul12)   talk 16:11, 11 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 41) ***Alright, that's good. Now that things are source, it makes more sense. Had not known about the Prima guides, so good to that as well. Also, FoC = Empire at War: Forces of Corruption. 16:21, 11 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 42) ****I'll remove that. Is there anything else? (I'm currently creating the article LEGO Star Wars: The Complete Saga: Prima Official Game Guide so I can source the game.) -- Joe Butler (Obi Maul12)   talk 16:30, 11 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 43) *****I see nothing else. And good, with both the creation and removal. ;). 03:28, 12 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 44) From the desk of Atarumaster88
 * 45) * I didn't change this because I wasn't sure, but I'm used to seeing the Confederacy abbreviated as "CIS", not "C.I.S." If it's that way in the source, then keep it.
 * 46) * Need a bit more context on the Colicoids in the intro. Doesn't quite flow very well where the way it's currently structured.
 * 47) * If possible, detail what exactly was upgraded from W-series to Q-series.
 * 48) * From what I've played of Republic Commando, I don't recall them identifying the droidekas as Q-series specifically. Correct me if I'm wrong.
 * 49) **All information, such as the droideka dispenser bit, that's referenced from Republic Commando will need to be removed if the droids in question are not actually Q-series.
 * 50) * Present tense in the Design Flaws section is absolutely unacceptable.
 * 51) * Kindly check with other droid GAs to ensure that you're following precedent on organization/sectioning. I'm not sure, but I have a sneaky suspicion that it's not exactly in line.
 * 52) * "Additionally, there were limits when a droideka could fire at a target." Reword this sentence. I get what you're going for, but there has to be a better way to say it.
 * 53) * While this might not be a concern for GA, it'd be nice to have Galaxies information included in the article. (From Star Wars Galaxies: An Empire Divided)
 * 54) *Have a Super Terrific Friendly Un-frustrating day. Atarumaster88  [[Image:Jedi_Order.svg|20px]] ( Talk page ) 19:30, 11 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 55) I hate to be Imp, but that second image is distorted as hell and just overall horrible. It needs to be reuploaded or ditched. Havac 02:33, 12 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 56) History section needs expansion, and is missing Galaxies info. Also, nothing from the NEGTD? Also, and pardon me if I'm being thick here, why is the Episode I visual dictionary where the majority of stuff comes from when this subject first appeared in Episode III? Could also do with a {[1stID]} and a lead quote. -- AdmirableAckbar (Talk) 07:32, 26 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 57) *I will expand the history, and add Galaxies info. The reason that the majority of the references come from The Visual Dictionary is that the original droideka and the Q-series droideka are very similar in design, so many of the characteristics of the original droideka apply to the Q-series. -- Joe Butler (Obi Maul12)   talk 08:12, 26 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 58) *The history has been expanded. As far as the Galaxies info, I haven't played the game myself, but upon searching through the article itself I could not find any information relating to the Q-series droideka. -- Joe Butler (Obi Maul12)   talk 08:44, 26 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 59) **If you want to use the Episode I VD, then you'll need to provide a source stating that the Q-series had everything the other droideka had. -- AdmirableAckbar (Talk) 17:22, 26 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 60) ***That has been done; Revenge of the Sith: Incredible Cross-Sections, a book about vehicles and droids. -- Joe Butler (Obi Maul12)   talk 23:11, 27 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 61) ****Could you post a quote? It's not that I think you made it up or anything, but I'd like to make sure it's not been misinterpreted or anything. -- AdmirableAckbar (Talk) 14:27, 28 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 62) Are they definitely Q-series in Survivor's Quest and Battlefront? Frankly, half the article looks like you've taken info about the regular droideka and used it for the Q-series's article. Unless models appearing are specifically identified as Q-series, then the info cannot be included. -- AdmirableAckbar (Talk) 22:00, 28 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 63) *I've added an additional quote. As for the rest of the article, well, yeah, some of the information is the same, because it has to be, since, like I said above, there are very few differences between the original droideka and the Q-series. And yes, in some of the levels, the type of droideka is Q-series, specifically because the only type of droideka that was produced after the Battle of Coruscant was Q-series, because of its upgrades. -- Joe Butler (Obi Maul12)   talk 20:16, 28 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 64) **Sorry; what I meant by "quote" was the quote (to be listed here, not on the article) from ROTS:ICS which establishes that the Q-series had everything the original had. Also, unless a source either states outright or indicates (i.e. it's stated the droid was produced after Coruscant, or any special features unique to the droid are described) that the droideka in it is a Q-series, the info cannot be included in the article. Please try and format your responses as other have been. -- AdmirableAckbar (Talk) 22:00, 28 May 2008 (UTC)
 * I'll note that while a Behind the scenes (BTS) is often preferred in articles, a BTS is not required per the current GAN rules. It's fine to ask if one can be created using any available information, but it's not a requirement, per se. Greyman  @wikiajanitor ( Talk ) 05:34, 11 May 2008 (UTC)
 * A stub worth sourcing? I've seen shorter articles than this. -- Joe Butler Obi Maul12   talk 05:50, 11 May 2008 (UTC)
 * Do you remove your opposition, or what else needs to be done? -- Joe Butler Obi Maul12   talk 06:36, 11 May 2008 (UTC)
 * Obimaul, you should never touch or edit another person's comments on a page without his or her permission. I originally posted my comment above because that's where I wanted it to be seen. Please don't move it into the "Comments" section like you did. Also, my objections will not be "removed." You will know when they are no longer in effect when they are stricken, as the first two currently are. And, only I can strike my own objections. A nominator should never do that himself. Toprawa and Ralltiir 06:50, 11 May 2008 (UTC)
 * Alright, sorry. -- Joe Butler (Obi Maul12)   talk 12:47, 11 May 2008 (UTC)
 * Quick question to the GA faithfull: Are there guidelines on how sources are "implied" or not? 15:42, 11 May 2008 (UTC)

Comments

(+3)
Support
 * 1) Nominated ajeanette 20 May 2008
 * 2) Darth Xadún ( Consult the Holocron ) 19:27, 21 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 3) Goodwood  [[Image:Redstarbird.svg|20px]] ( Alliance Intelligence ) 04:05, 22 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 4) Drewton  [[Image:SWTFU_WP1_1280x1024.jpg|25px]] 02:15, 24 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 5) Jedi Kasra 06:09, 26 May 2008 (UTC)

Oppose
 * 1) Toprawa:
 * 2) *Not bad, but pretty rough around the edges. Here are the things I notice without even reading the article:
 * 3) * Intro should be expanded
 * 4) **I added a few more details about her background and the situation she encountered. ajeanette 22 May 2008
 * 5) *These one sentence sections are not good. They need to be either expanded or condensed into other sections. They look especially bad considering your one section is six paragraphs long. There's just no presentation feel to the article. Sectioning needs major work.
 * 6) **The second and third sections still need work. Six paragraphs in a single section of an article this size is a little overdone, and the little bit about her emergence from stasis still doesn't warrant its own section, at least not the bit amount allotted. Better section division, please. Toprawa and Ralltiir
 * 7) * Your last section title is not exactly encyclopedic.
 * 8) * We don't capitalize "Galaxy" anymore.
 * 9) * Please don't put spaces in between punctuation and referencing. A minor issue, but a formatting issue nonetheless.
 * 10) * Your images should alternate from right to left down the sides of the page, which they do not.
 * 11) *If you handle these, there will be a more detailed Round 2. Toprawa and Ralltiir 04:46, 22 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 12) **Ajeanette, a nominator must never strike objections for someone else. That is left up to the reviewer only when they are satisfied their concerns have been handled. Please do not do that again. Toprawa and Ralltiir 18:35, 27 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 13) *** Understood ajeanette 27 May 2008
 * 14) The Anvil:
 * 15) * With all the images that have popped up for this chick, the profile shot just isn't a good one for the main image. One in particular sticks out as being more appropriate (Image:Celeste KOTORcover.jpg)...
 * 16) *That being said, your image layout could use some work. Try not to have the images on the left displacing the section titles, and make sure that the three images you have placed in the article are evenly spaced, so as not to appear cluttered in one area or another.
 * 17) * In the intro, you say: "Celeste Morne was a female Human Jedi Knight who served the Jedi Covenant as a Shadow, an agent whose records of their existence had been erased and were known only to a few of the Covenant's members." Clunky prose, should be reworded.
 * 18) * (In the intro) You go on to say, "Her losses from the Great Sith War channeled her dedication to the cause of the Covenant to stop the Sith from rising again." Her involvement in the GSW must have been significant enough for a brief mention. And, what did the War cause her to lose?
 * 19) * (Intro still) "In 3,963 BBY the Covenant assigned her a mission to retrieve an ancient Sith artifact known as the Muur Talisman and kill Zayne Carrick, the Jedi Padawan fugitive." Please reword.
 * 20) * (Intro still) "However, in the course this mission she doubted Zayne's criminal charges and faced off against the rampant Rakghoul plague, caused by the Muur Talisman, infecting the Mandalorian invasion force on Jebble." You make it sound as though she fought the plague. It sounds to me more like she encountered it.
 * 21) * (Intro still) "In the course of her struggle to complete her far more complicated mission and dealing with her own doubts about Carrick, Celeste fell under the possession of the Muur Talisman." Clunky prose, should be reworded.
 * 22) *Early career section: You start by saying, "After the destruction of Ossus, Celeste's family became homeless and wandered the Galaxy for years until they fell apart". I feel like I was just dropped head-first into the story. I think that each of the things mentioned in this sentence could be fleshed out, ie: the destruction of Ossus, what about it caused her family to become homeless, why they fell apart.
 * 23) * Next sentence, "However, Celeste found herself a new family in the Covenant as a secret agent devoted to stopping the rise of the Sith in the galaxy again." Who is this Covenant you speak of? If the rise of the Sith needs to be stopped again, what happened with them the first time that makes them doing it again so significant?
 * 24) * Same section, please explain who Lucien Draay & Zayne Carrick are, and why did Draay want him captured.
 * 25) * Same sentence: "Around 3,963 BBY Lucien Draay contacted her and gave her the task of eliminating Zayne Carrick, before the Covenant feared he would become a Sith, and finding the Muur Talisman on Taris." Please reword this, probably breaking it up somehow. You've got three separate topics in this one sentence.
 * 26) * Next paragraph. What are rakghouls?
 * 27) * Too many semicolons there.
 * 28) * "The Muur Talisman" section. First, I think a better section title is warranted, maybe something like "The Quest for..."
 * 29) * Same section. Who is Pulsipher? Like the rakghouls above, this needs to be briefly explained.
 * 30) * You've got the phrase "on board" in there just too many times.
 * 31) * Ship names are always italicized.
 * 32) * What is the "War forge"? It should be explained at its first mention.
 * 33) * Same section, you say, "However, Gryph accidentally discharged his weapon causing a cave-in, which caused Celeste to lose her lightsaber and alerted the Mandalorians from the Mar'eyce to their presence. Before Celeste and Zayne could be taken hostage, one of the guards transformed into a Rakghoul, dropping Celeste’s lightsaber in the process and forcing the other guards to fire on their former comrade." How did the guard acquire her lightsaber after she dropped it?
 * 34) * Same section: You say, "When Zayne went off in search of Gryph, she followed, cutting down the Rakghouls that she encountered." Where did Gryph go? I thought he was still with them.
 * 35) * In the "Emerge from stasis" section, you say, "However, Celeste was not dead but still in stasis inside the apparently impregnable oubliette, where she remained for almost 3,950 years until around 19 BBY." Reword please, as apparently is POVish.
 * 36) * Same section. You've switched tenses a couple of times. Please fix.
 * 37) *BTS could be expanded alot.
 * 38) * This girl has quotes up the yin-yang on the QOTD, yet only two for the article? Surely you can do better!
 * 39) *Don't mind the "surely you can do better" thing, It's just a sweet Dooku line that I thought kinda fit the situation. You've done a splendid job thus far. Also, Ajeanette, dont be discouraged by what seems to be a long list. I was there before, and it helped me tremendously. If any of the objects are giving you a problem rectifying, I'll be more than happy to help you, because that's what we're about. Just ask if so ;) —Tommy ( There are no Jedi here ) 03:11, 30 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 40) **Tommy, what you said I have found to be true and I am glad to go through this process and learn how wookiepedia constructs good articles. I was a bit overwhelmed by your list, but I understand the importance of addressing these points that I am thankful you brought them up. I am in the process of correcting each one and I appreciate all the help I have received from other editors that have improved Celeste Morne. The only point I might bring up is that finding more information for "Behind the Scenes" may take more time for me. ajeanette 30 May 2008
 * 41) ***Hey thats cool, it was that way for me too. Don't stress too much about the BTS. KOTOR isn't really my timeframe, so I don't have/know much about Celeste. I'm sure you'll be able to work it out. I'll see what I can add, if anything. Take your time, my very 1st nom sat here for a month before the wheels started turning. When this one finally passes, you'll have stepped your game up;) —Tommy ( There are no Jedi here ) 17:11, 1 June 2008 (UTC)

Comments
 * I've fixed all of the spelling mistakes. Drewton  [[Image:SWTFU_WP1_1280x1024.jpg|25px]] 02:15, 24 May 2008 (UTC)

(+4)
Support
 * 1) Think I got everything.  Chack Jadson  (Talk) 11:50, 22 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 2) As a fan of alien species and cultures, I found this fascinating. Roll with Topwara's hammerblows, Commander Jadson. Darth Xadún ( Consult the Holocron ) 10:24, 27 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 3) I'm going to vote for this on the assumption that this is merely Stage 1 of the process of putting this article together. Everything is there, but it's really just summarized, and not comprehensively explained. After looking at some of these sources myself, many things could definitely be fleshed out, and I have no doubt an expansion could bring this thing to 1000 words. Toprawa and Ralltiir 23:58, 27 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 4) As Toprawa and Ralltiir said, this is good for now, but could be expanded to FA quality. &mdash;Silly Dan (talk) 00:25, 2 June 2008 (UTC)

Oppose
 * 1) Toprawa, Round 1:
 * 2) * Infobox not fully sourced
 * 3) **Stupid. Fixed.
 * 4) * Your intro is painfully short
 * 5) **Expanded.
 * 6) * Section titles should match the Layout Guide.
 * 7) **I tried to fix it. If it's still not right, could you explain how?
 * 8) ***It's correct. Toprawa and Ralltiir 20:45, 27 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 9) * Please, oh please, do not link articles to wikipedia. Take the effort and make an article for the Wook. Toprawa and Ralltiir 16:57, 22 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 10) **We've done that for other articles. It's on a topic that I don't really know anything about (read the Wikipedia article and see if you can comprehend it) and I'm not sure how to make it simpler. I'll see if I can find an FA with Wikipedia links.
 * 11) ***It's been done with other articles because people are too lazy to make an article themselves. It's a poor practice that needs to stop. If you can't make an article for it, leave it as a red link. Toprawa and Ralltiir 20:10, 22 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 12) **** As the person who put that link in when expanding it from a stub, I'd like to point out three things: (1) At the time, we hadn't established that every real-world scientific concept which is almost exactly the same IU as in the real world needed an article, so I put a Wikipedia link in so the concept could be explained to readers who didn't understand the term; (2) I still don't think an article is necessary or even desirable for every such topic, but that's a debate for elsewhere (where most of you would probably disagree with me); (3) although the Gotal/H'nemthe situation clearly is convergent evolution, I don't know if the sources actually use those words. &mdash;Silly Dan (talk) 21:44, 22 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 13) *****If these terms are not canonically used, then I think it would be best to avoid them. If so, then an explanation of the real-world equivalent in the BTS would be appropriate, where then the wiki links can be used as an OOU substitute. IU linking to OOU concepts, however, doesn't fit well. Toprawa and Ralltiir 21:57, 22 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 14) ****** It's a minor enough detail of terminology that removing the words and the link is OK, as far as I'm concerned. Explaining convergent evolution in the BTS would strike me as a bit superfluous. &mdash;Silly Dan (talk) 22:51, 22 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 15) *I removed it, on the basis that it's OR, as those terms are not actually used.  Chack Jadson  (Talk) 19:40, 23 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 16) Round Two:
 * 17) * Can we link these "common names" to something? I'm assuming they're of individuals who do, or should, have articles. Toprawa and Ralltiir 20:45, 27 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 18) **Actually, they are no individuals named such that I'm aware of. These are simply common names invented by UAA. We don't link to these for other species GAs.  Chack Jadson  (Talk) 21:27, 27 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 19) ***That's fine. Toprawa and Ralltiir 23:58, 27 May 2008 (UTC)

Comments If I might suggest some quotes (all of them from Nightlily: The Lovers' Tale): -Skippy Farlstendoiro 15:33, 23 May 2008 (UTC)
 * No quotes available? --Eyrezer 03:29, 23 May 2008 (UTC)
 * -"Are you truly sure, beloved? Mating is such a solemn thing, such an awe-inspiring thing..." (M'iiyoom Onith, reflecting on the importance of mating)
 * -"Nightlily, you mean... Everything. Everything to me". "Oh... Oh... Oh, Trevagg. That we should have met like this-that you should come into my life like this.." (Feltipern Trevagg and M'iiyoom Onith, talking about two different things)
 * "The word for 'love' in one language is the word for 'dinner' in others." (Ithorian proverb)
 * "After mating, H'nemthe females gut the males with those tongues of theirs-they're as sharp as sword blades, and a lot stronger than they look. Some kind of biological reaction to there being twenty H'nemthe males for every female. The males seem to think it's worth it, to achieve the act of love. I saw them together in the can-Una, but I didn't think Trevagg was crazy enough to try to bed the girl." (Wuher) "He was always bragging about being such a great hunter. You'd have thought he'd sense it coming." (Balu) "How could he? For her, it was the act of love, too." (Wuher again; possibly only the two last lines for this quote)
 * Thank you. These look good.

(+3)
Support
 * 1) Thefourdotelipsis 12:54, 24 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 2) —Tommy ( There are no Jedi here ) 11:10, 3 June 2008 (UTC)
 * 3) Cavalier One ( Squadron channel ) 13:59, 3 June 2008 (UTC)

Oppose
 * 1) The Anvil:
 * 2) * I'm sorry, but at least for the individuals & the Fair Game, there should be something other than a redlink. I'm cool with stubs, I've had to create plenty of them for this reason ;)
 * 3) * No quote for the "Captaincy" section?
 * 4) * —Tommy ( There are no Jedi here ) 17:46, 2 June 2008 (UTC)
 * 5) **Eh, there's no rule for either of these. For FA I'd be inclined to do so. Maybe at some stage I'll de-redlink it, but since it's not a rule, as far as I can see, I don't see how these objections are legitimate. Thefourdotelipsis 08:13, 3 June 2008 (UTC)
 * 6) *** I know there aren't rules for these things, but that wasn't my reasoning. I just feel like if I want to know more about these subjects, I'd have to ask you as opposed to being able to just click the link & find out for myself, thats all. The first objection was spawned out of curiosity. And the quote thing isn't a big deal, I just figured you'd be able to find another with relative ease. If not, that's fine as well. —Tommy ( There are no Jedi here ) 09:19, 3 June 2008 (UTC)
 * 7) ****Well, you did ask nicely. :P So I've got those four stubs there now, but as for the quote, I tend to like to use them in articles where they were actually uttered, and the captaincy section is all prior to the adventure. Still, in future, if you have requests like this that aren't actually objections, it's probably a safer bet to ask them in the Comments section, so you don't have to experience lazy/grouchy 4dot again. :P Thefourdotelipsis 10:17, 3 June 2008 (UTC)

Comments
 * Sorry about the quality of the images...if anyone can replace them with better ones, it'd be much appreciated. Also, I don't see a redlink rule, so I gotta plead ignorance here. Plus, those of the "a redlink is better than a stub" camp should be pleased. Thefourdotelipsis 12:54, 24 May 2008 (UTC)

(+1)
Support Oppose
 * 1) Yrfeloran 03:07, 26 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 1) It should probably have some more pics. --Eyrezer 06:47, 26 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 2) *More pics added. Yrfeloran 19:13, 26 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 3) From the Gatekeeper of Xadún's holocron:

Comments
 * 1) * The opening sentence requires refinement, as 'woman' is a term usually associated with Human females, and we know nothing of where she was from. Suggest 'Mdam Rhoden was a female of an unidentified species and hailed from Yorn Skot', with a link to unidentified species, then go on to describing family ties etc.
 * 2) **Eh, if you can use women for Tuskens, I don't see that this is an issue. Yrfeloran 18:48, 27 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 3) *** I think you've misunderstood me. My point was that it is a fairly non-descript way of opening an article. Using your Tusken example, the opening gives the name, alternate terms, and their hailing planet in the first line. This is the basic format for character articles, naming species and homeworld or world of residence. Hence, see my example above.
 * 4) ****The issue is that that forcing "female of unidentified species" in there is both clunky writing and kind of unnecessary. I've done some adjustments and linked 'List of unidentified species' in the infobox. Yrfeloran 22:26, 29 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 5) * The intro does not mention the confrontation with Rhoden's husband, the detonation of the bomb or her subsequent death.
 * 6) **Changed to explicitly mention the confrontation, but she didn't die. Yrfeloran 18:48, 27 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 7) * Remove the link from 'Lot 44C'. The redlink looks untidy and to give the lot an article in it's own right would be pointless.
 * 8) ** Sure Yrfeloran 18:48, 27 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 9) * The following quotes all appear to switch between italics and normal text at unusual places. Granted, this may be from the text, but i can't check that. -
 * 10) **"I've seen enough core bombs in my life to know what I saw. That kind of detonator can only trigger high-yield explosives on a chromium switch, and only core bombs use remotely triggered chromium fuses."
 * 11) **"Can't you see I'm talking to the lovely -- and might I add potentially independently wealthy beyond her wildest dreams -- young lady here?"
 * 12) **" First, I'm going to take your mining station to cover what you owe me." "Then I'm going to take everything else." "And then I'm going to give it all back to her for being so doggone lovely ".
 * 13) **From the text Yrfeloran 18:48, 27 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 14) * "At that point, the group of pressure pirates who had been plotting to steal the vessel showed up, and began to board it." Change this sentence please, as 'showed up' is a poor description for an encyclopedia.
 * 15) **Tweaked Yrfeloran 18:48, 27 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 16) *I am assuming the second bomb core killed all aboard the Aurorient Express, and no-one escaped? Please confirm this at the end of the article.
 * 17) ** Uh, no, I mentioned everybody was evacuated. Yrfeloran 18:48, 27 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 18) ***Sorry, misreading on my part.
 * 19) * "Madam Rhoden was attached to her possessions and what she felt were her possession, such as her chaughaine sweater and the Aurorient Express itself." Revise this sentence - it is unencyclopeadic. I recommend breaking it into two, first saying she was attatched to her possessions, and second saying she believed she had ownership oveer things that belonged to her spouses or lovers.
 * 20) **Eh, tweaked.Yrfeloran 01:29, 28 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 21) * I would say that the P&t section could be expanded. Refer to her seduction of men for financial gain, her attractiveness to other males, etc.
 * 22) **There's really no seduction involved. Moegantz apparently just likes being treated like crap. Yrfeloran 01:29, 28 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 23) ***Ok then.
 * 24) *Otherwise, pretty good. Additional kudos for the use of 'unbeknownst' in the article! Darth Xadún ( Consult the Holocron ) 11:25, 27 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 25) "However, the Captain of the Aurorient Express, unwilling to be complicit in the destruction of the station, detonated the bomb aboard the empty life pod early." The article doesn't explain how/why the Captain had the detonator. --Eyrezer 23:06, 3 June 2008 (UTC)
 * 26) I'd also appreciate a description somewhere of Rhoden's appearance. The BTS might be the appropriate place for it, perhaps mentioning the species has not been identified by its similar to X or Y. --Eyrezer 23:06, 3 June 2008 (UTC)
 * Arguments about the article's title start here. Yrfeloran 03:07, 26 May 2008 (UTC)

(+3)
Support
 * 1) --Eyrezer 04:36, 26 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 2)  Aqua  Unasi  02:11, 29 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 3) Toprawa and Ralltiir 06:34, 31 May 2008 (UTC)

Oppose
 * 1) From the homework avoiding Aqua Unasi...
 * 2) * There's a few spots in here that I think are typos, but I'm not exactly sure so I didn't want to change it myself.
 * 3) **"-he was forced to keep a low profile, yet this not prevent him from staying in contact with his underworld connections"
 * 4) **"Hidalgo agreed that Skivvers made be modifying it"
 * 5) ***I blame my fat fingers :p Fixed.
 * 6) * Its a bit confusing skipping from Tay Vanis to Tiree in the intro with no explanation - I know I was confused before I looked it up. Context or explanation would be helpful :)
 * 7) **Good call. Changed all the refs to Vanis.
 * 8) * Could the infobox be expanded? Didn't it talk about his home world in the article somewhere?
 * 9) **Nope. That info is conspicuously absent. The article does mention the generic homeworld of the Ho'Din species for some context on him (in the P&T I believe), but it does not identify this as his homeworld...
 * 10) *** Ah. I see.
 * 11) *Otherwise that's all I have. Nice article :)  Aqua  Unasi  22:15, 28 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 12) **Cheers for the review Aqua. --Eyrezer 01:42, 29 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 13) ***Heh. If I can't write good articles, I might as well reveiew them I guess. :)  Aqua  Unasi  02:04, 29 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 14) Toprawa:
 * 15) * The only concern I have is that this may be a bit extrapolating. Does GG4 say anything about the species' involvement with technology being unusual, or just that the planet was forbidden from having it? "...somewhat unusual for a Ho'Din since technology was forbidden on Moltok" Toprawa and Ralltiir 02:35, 30 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 16) **It's definitely a species related thing:
 * 17) ***"The Ho'Din are master botanists who revile technology and limit its use" - The Essential Guide to Alien Species
 * 18) ***"Ho'Din ... use modern technological devices only when necessary.... Ho'Din tech specialists are unheard of." - Ulitmate Alien Anthology
 * 19) ***"While the Ho'Din will avail themselves of technology while on other worlds, it is strictly controlled on Moltok .... [Ho'Din] believe that technology is an affront to nature, and it is only acceptable on other planets, because those planets have already been substantially harmed by the actions of thoughtless animal species." - Galaxy Guide 4
 * 20) ****Of these sources, GG4 is probably the least emphatic on this, so I've modified the reference to UAA instead. --Eyrezer 01:40, 31 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 21) *****Impressive anecdotal evidence. :) Toprawa and Ralltiir 06:34, 31 May 2008 (UTC)

Comments

(+0)
Support
 * 1)  Chack Jadson  (Talk)  21:07, 29 May 2008 (UTC)

Oppose
 * 1) By the looks of things, you've missed this Wizards source: Saga Edition Web Enhancement: The Pau'ans. There is also BTS info in the article on Star Wars that I added to the sources section. --Eyrezer 11:54, 30 May 2008(UTC)
 * 2) *Added. Thanks for the sources. There was not much BTS info though; most of it is better suited to Medon rather than the species.  Chack Jadson  (Talk) 20:21, 30 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 3) **You seem to have added info to the article without adding refs. Ie, the 57,000 year date is in the Wizards source, yet to that paragraph you've only added an EpIII reference. Furthermore, the referencing has only been done at the end of the paragraph, not the particular fact. Finally, the sourcing abbreviations need to be shortened. --Eyrezer 22:36, 30 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 4) ***Stupid of me. Fixed.  Chack Jadson  (Talk) 13:50, 31 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 5) The BTS also seems rather patchy and short. --Eyrezer 22:37, 30 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 6) *How is it now?  Chack Jadson  (Talk) 19:33, 3 June 2008 (UTC)
 * 7) **Better. --Eyrezer 23:09, 3 June 2008 (UTC)
 * 8) The Anvil:
 * 9) *Just one thing...I don't think the lead quote is appropriate. I know it's from Episode 2, but it doesn't relate to the species other than being what Obi-Wan said to one of them. I'd just remove it, if none others are available. —Tommy ( Clean face and hands ) The Anvil 22:40, 30 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 10) **I'll go through the ROTS novel and see if I can find a better one, but a lead quote is important, so I'd like to keep this one if a better one cannot be found.  Chack Jadson  (Talk) 13:50, 31 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 11) ***Important, but not essential for GA. This quote is circumstancial - it doesn't reference anything to the Pau'an people. If you find a better one, it can always be added later. Darth Xadún ( Consult the Holocron ) 07:54, 3 June 2008 (UTC)
 * 12) ****I've got no problem with that quote... --Eyrezer 23:09, 3 June 2008 (UTC)
 * 13) *****I've seen other GAs with poor quotes. I've checked several sources, and have found no better quotes. I'll keep looking but I don't expect to find anything. If anyone has one, please add it.  Chack Jadson  (Talk) 00:34, 4 June 2008 (UTC)
 * 14) Finally, given that the Wizards article is over 3,000 words, and this one is only 800 I suspect there is still plenty of info missing from the article. --Eyrezer 22:42, 30 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 15) *I think I just compressed it more, but I'll go through the article again and look for any missing info, and try to expand what I can here.  Chack Jadson  (Talk) 13:50, 31 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 16) **Expanded it last night. Should be much more comprehensive now.  Chack Jadson  (Talk) 17:28, 1 June 2008 (UTC)

Comments
 * Another NEGAS nom.  Chack Jadson  (Talk) 21:07, 29 May 2008 (UTC)

(+1)
Support
 * 1)  Drgns007 Sith Lord 03:40, 30 May 2008 (UTC)

Oppose
 * 1) It's got an expand tag on it. -- AdmirableAckbar (Talk) 10:47, 30 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 2) From Aqua Unasi
 * 3) * Some stuff in the article could use a bit more context and explanation as to who/what it is:
 * 4) ** "She did not want a repeat of Ducha Requud's unfortunate accident." What is this accident? Could you add a quick explanation?
 * 5) **" in case Taryn and Ben ran into problems" Could you un-pipelink Ben here, so people know that it's Ben Skywalker?
 * 6) ** The article seems to be assuming that the reader knows whats happening when it starts talking about "Trista stayed back to protect Livette in case Taryn and Ben run into trouble - What are they doing? Is it possible to explain without messing up the flow of the article?
 * 7) ** You could maybe add that Shedu Maad is a Hapan world, but thats a bit picky I guess :)
 * 8) * Okay, so if you add some of that in, hopefully the article will be a little longer, and then it might be nice if you could divide it into sections like an Introduction, a Biography and maybe a Personality and Traits section?
 * 9) ** I see you divided the article into sections - good. One thing I'd suggest about that is to put some of the stuff about Livette not dealing with normal Hapan vanities and such into the P&T section, instead of the intro.
 * 10) * Cool, good work. The article is much better now. It still could use a little work though.
 * 11) ** I'm not sure if the introduction is really a great overview of the article, now that you added about her gray hair and such in the P&T, you could summarize that part a bit and add about her being suspected of helping th Remenant, or something.
 * 12) **The prose in the article is a bit choppy, and in some spots, I'm a bit confused as to what is happening. I went through and cleaned it up a bit, but you might want to read through it and see if you think anything could be cleared up a bit.
 * 13) ** Also, with the referencing, I'm not exactly sure what the policy is when there is only one source, but I'm pretty sure that you don't need to have references in the article then, its assumed its all from its one appearance. Right now you just have one part sourced, and it looks kinda weird. :)
 * 14) ** In the infobox, it has "Imperial Remnant?" Is the questionmark necessary? Is she or isn't she? I actually haven't read Invincible yet, so thats a bit confusing to me.
 * 15) * Nice work! :)  Aqua  Unasi  22:20, 30 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 16) Way too short. Expand, expand, expand. It starts off very suddenly, and is modeled wrong too.  Chack Jadson  (Talk) 13:52, 31 May 2008 (UTC)

Comments
 * 1) Ok I'll try to do that, but maybe some you help me out.  Drgns007 Sith Lord 14:37, 31 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 2) *Thanks Aqua Unasi, I'll do that.  Drgns007 Sith Lord 18:45, 31 May 2008 (UTC)
 * 3) **How's that?  Drgns007 Sith Lord 17:00, 1 June 2008 (UTC)
 * 4) *** Better! I reviewed it again - see my comments above. :)  Aqua  Unasi  18:56, 1 June 2008 (UTC)
 * 5) ****Ok, what do you mean summarize about her grey hair in the introduction? I thought it was already like that.   Drgns007 Sith Lord 19:13, 1 June 2008 (UTC)
 * 6) *****In the introduction you have who she is and her job, and then you talk about her hair color and the blaster burn and stuff. I was trying to say that you're very specific about that, but not about the events of her life and such, and it's good to have a quick overview of that in your introduction. I guess saying to summarize it wasn't the best wording, since it is already summarized, but I just meant to maybe make the intro more, well-rounded, I guess.  Aqua  Unasi  19:24, 1 June 2008 (UTC)

(+3)
Support
 * 1) Thefourdotelipsis 06:51, 1 June 2008 (UTC)
 * 2) Second. —Tommy ( There are no Jedi here ) 03:11, 2 June 2008 (UTC)
 * 3) Cavalier One ( Squadron channel ) 12:35, 3 June 2008 (UTC)

Oppose

Comments

(+3)
Support
 * 1) Ozzel 10:51, 1 June 2008 (UTC)
 * 2) Cheers to Harvey Korman. Safe harbor, my friend. —Tommy ( There are no Jedi here ) 21:56, 2 June 2008 (UTC)
 * 3) Good Toprawa and Ralltiir 18:36, 3 June 2008 (UTC)

Oppose
 * 1) The Anvil:
 * 2) * The infobox could be completely sourced.
 * 3) **Got that one. Thefourdotelipsis 09:28, 2 June 2008 (UTC)
 * 4) * No more quotes?
 * 5) * —Tommy ( There are no Jedi here ) 18:42, 1 June 2008 (UTC)
 * 6) Toprawa:
 * 7) * Assuming our article is correct and the Holiday Special takes place in 0 ABY, referring to "years" in the past would safely give him a Rise of the Empire era tag: "felt more alive than he had in years"
 * 8) **Fair enough.
 * 9) * On his empty glass, or in his empty glass? "he placed the flowers on his empty glass"
 * 10) **It's on. He lays them across the top. I've clarified with "on top of".
 * 11) * Are we quoting him, or are we quoting the section title? If it's the latter, quotes should go: "Ackmena say those "six simple little words" to" Toprawa and Ralltiir 03:05, 3 June 2008 (UTC)
 * 12) **His quote. Better now? -- Ozzel 07:31, 3 June 2008 (UTC)
 * 13) ***Yup. Toprawa and Ralltiir 18:36, 3 June 2008 (UTC)

Comments

(+5)
Support
 * 1) Well, his brother's up for FA, so ... - Cavalier One ( Squadron channel ) 09:19, 2 June 2008 (UTC)
 * 2) I enjoy your style, Cavalier. Keep writing!  Darth Xadún ( Consult the Holocron ) 08:09, 3 June 2008 (UTC)
 * 3) --Eyrezer 08:17, 3 June 2008 (UTC)
 * 4) Clean bill of health. —Tommy ( There are no Jedi here ) 11:21, 3 June 2008 (UTC)
 * 5) This one went through quick. Toprawa and Ralltiir 00:27, 4 June 2008 (UTC)

Oppose
 * 1) The Anvil:
 * 2) * No quotes?
 * 3) **Afraid not. The character does not appear in any in-universe narrative, and the lead quote is the only dialogue even referencing him.
 * 4) * Also, I know nothing about this character, but I imagine that some sort of BTS could be worked up.
 * 5) **Added.
 * 6) *Otherwise, very well written article. —Tommy ( There are no Jedi here ) 17:34, 2 June 2008 (UTC)
 * 7) **Thank you! - Cavalier One ( Squadron channel ) 07:28, 3 June 2008 (UTC)
 * 8) Toprawa's Silver Hammer:
 * 9) * This is a pretty specific mention of "the" task force. Can we link an article to this at all? "the task force to liberate the planet Kal'Shebbol"
 * 10) **Article created and linked to.
 * 11) ***Ok, thanks. Very ambitious and much appreciated. :)
 * 12) * A brief bit of context here would help clarify: "Ciro was assigned to the FarStar mission"
 * 13) **Added.
 * 14) * This is a bit awkward use of description here. Frozen as in icy climate, frozen monetary assets? Without previous knowledge of Dolomar being an icy planet, as I'm guessing this is about, a lack of context just makes this confusing. Please either contextualize, or remove the "frozen": "as a way to leave his frozen homeworld"
 * 15) **Removed.
 * 16) * I would assume we have an article for New Republic Special Ops. Please check and pipelink: "While Keleman trained as a commando operative"
 * 17) **Linked.
 * 18) * Same with the first objection: "the task force charged with liberating Kal'Shebbol"
 * 19) **Linked to newly created article.
 * 20) * POV: "changed Ciro for the better"
 * 21) **Removed "for the better".
 * 22) * Just checking, is this "Gamesmaster" and not "Gamemaster"? "the individual playing styles of the Gamesmaster"
 * 23) **Should be Gamemaster. Changed.
 * 24) **Good job once again, Cav. Toprawa and Ralltiir 19:33, 3 June 2008 (UTC)
 * 25) ***Thank you! - Cavalier One ( Squadron channel ) 22:42, 3 June 2008 (UTC)

Comments
 * Nice job, Cavalier. Just one pointer&mdash;I noticed you use double spaces in between sentences. While that is how most of us have been taught to type, we only single space between sentences around here. Just an FYI. —Tommy ( There are no Jedi here ) 11:21, 3 June 2008 (UTC)

(+2)
Support
 * 1) Another nomination from the DarkStryder series. - Cavalier One ( Squadron channel ) 12:28, 3 June 2008 (UTC)
 * 2) Impressive. Though, I would like to see a battle or a lightsaber duel outta you sometime soon&hellip;that, would be interesting. —Tommy ( There are no Jedi here ) 14:01, 4 June 2008 (UTC)

Oppose
 * 1) The Anvil:
 * 2) * Eliminate one of the ref tags in the infobox about his eye color, unless absolutely necessary.
 * 3) **I eliminated the second one, and moved the reference about the changing eye colour into the article.
 * 4) * "At some point, he was cast out and shunned by his own family for an unspecified deed, although his intense addiction may have been the cause." May have been the cause is POVish.
 * 5) **True, but that's how it's explained in the Sourcebook. It says he was shunned and an outcast, and speculates that his addiction was the cause.  There are no more specifics. I'd have to leave it out, but I feel it adds weight to the first section.  Rewording it would still call for speculation, though.
 * 6) * "Making the short journey from the Minos Cluster to the Kathol sector, Tist ended up on the planet Kal'Shebbol, where he fell in with a local crime boss." Who is this local crime boss you speak of, and crime boss should be linked (crime lord).
 * 7) **Linked to crime lord, but the identity of the crime boss is not revealed.
 * 8) * I would reorganize the second paragraph of the "Serving on the FarStar" section, so that the bit about the DarkStryder genetic engineering comes before the bit about Tist being regarded with awe.
 * 9) **Reworded.
 * 10) *Otherwise, all good. —Tommy ( There are no Jedi here ) 20:26, 3 June 2008 (UTC)
 * 11) **Thank you! - Cavalier One ( Squadron channel ) 23:18, 3 June 2008 (UTC)

Comments
 * There are no quotes for the character since he was not featured in any in-universe narrative. - Cavalier One ( Squadron channel ) 12:28, 3 June 2008 (UTC)
 * What about a generic quote about salt-addicted Arconas, FarStar crewbeings or something like that? --Skippy Farlstendoiro 12:35, 3 June 2008 (UTC)
 * Just for that reason&mdash;they're generic. Quotes should relate specifically to the individual in question. —Tommy ( There are no Jedi here ) 13:55, 4 June 2008 (UTC)

(-1)
Support


 * A lot of referencing about this popular exhibition including quite a number of images, links and full details of the tour. As far as I know the list of items is complete, as I attended it in 2003.Katana Geldar  10:08, 4 June 2008 (UTC)

Oppose
 * It's just a list. With images next to the list, which is not how we're supposed to use images. There's about 120 words here, and whilst there's no word limit, there's no actual substance in this article at all. Information about its conception, development, any media coverage et cetera is needed here. Thefourdotelipsis 10:33, 4 June 2008 (UTC)
 * Per Fourdot. —Tommy ( There are no Jedi here ) 14:01, 4 June 2008 (UTC)

Comments