Wookieepedia:Good article nominations/Roo-Roo Page


 * ''The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a good article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Roo-Roo Page

 * Nominated by: Darth Trayus  Sith_Emblem.svg ( Trayus Academy ) 07:17, December 1, 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: Babies are done. Now get in my belly.

(4 ACs/2 Users/6 Total)
Support
 * 1) No.  Chack Jadson  (Talk)  22:25, December 7, 2009 (UTC)
 * 2) ~ SavageBob 01:47, December 9, 2009 (UTC)
 * 3)  Jonjedigrandmaster  ( Jedi Beacon ) 01:51, December 9, 2009 (UTC)
 * 4) SoresuMakashi ( Everything I tell you is a lie  the truth  ) 09:24, December 9, 2009 (UTC)
 * 5) Toprawa and Ralltiir 04:40, December 19, 2009 (UTC)
 * 6)  CC7567  (talk) 08:14, December 19, 2009 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) I want my baby-back baby-back baby-back baby-back ribs
 * 2) * Just one thing: can the intro be shortened a bit? It's a little disproportionate to the body right now. Jonjedigrandmaster  ( Jedi Beacon ) 23:01, December 7, 2009 (UTC)
 * 3) **Is that any better or would you like it to be less lengthy? (On a side note, that's what she said.) Darth Trayus  Sith_Emblem.svg ( Trayus Academy ) 03:38, December 8, 2009 (UTC)
 * 4) ***That's a little better, but I'd still like it to come down a bit more. It's still more than half the length of the bio, which&mdash;unless the article is extremely short&mdash;shouldn't be the case. Jonjedigrandmaster  ( Jedi Beacon ) 15:56, December 8, 2009 (UTC)
 * 5) ****Give it a look-see now.
 * 6) Prepare to be savaged...
 * 7) * Just some minor stuff. The sentence beginning "The Order entered Page's name into a database of all known Force-sensitive children in the galaxy called the Kyber crystal" reads a bit awkwardly because "called the Kaibur crystal" comes after "galaxy" rather than after "database", leaving the reader to pause a beat before catching on. It reads more smoothly in the body of the article. Could you perhaps tweak the intro a bit to be more like the body?
 * 8) * "Fortunately for the young Gungan..." Yeah, it probably was fortunate, but it sounds POV (I'd wager that Sidious didn't think it fortunate.) Can you reword this? Otherwise, looks great! ~ SavageBob 17:09, December 8, 2009 (UTC)
 * 9) **Both have (hopefully) been addressed. Darth Trayus  Sith_Emblem.svg ( Trayus Academy ) 01:31, December 9, 2009 (UTC)
 * 10) Soresu
 * 11) * I understand this is difficult for an article about a baby, but is there anything at all that could be included in a P&T? It's virtually a requirement in the Layout Guide. How about tendencies to display certain emotions or actions? SoresuMakashi ( Everything I tell you is a lie  the truth  ) 03:22, December 9, 2009 (UTC)
 * 12) **I was waiting for this, because I knew someone would mention it, and I did honestly try to make one when writing it. Unfortunately, it looked pretty silly. Page herself appears in the episode for less than 5 seconds, during which she is doing nothing but smiling. That's really all that could go in a P&T, but that says nothing of her personality or traits. And she doesn't appear long enough to show any repeated tendancies. I put in the bio that she was cheerful when she was shown, but beyond that there really isn't any information. Same goes for Zinn Toa. Darth Trayus  Sith_Emblem.svg ( Trayus Academy ) 04:59, December 9, 2009 (UTC)
 * 13) ***That's fine with me. I was just making sure. :) SoresuMakashi ( Everything I tell you is a lie  the truth  ) 09:24, December 9, 2009 (UTC)
 * 14) Toprawa:
 * 15) * I would like to see the intro pared down a little bit. All the information about Ropal, the crystal being stolen by Palpatine and Bane, and the Jedi Order sensing this information through the Force can be summarized far more concisely into no more than a sentence. Considering how little of a role Page herself has in this whole story, I would estimate the intro should be about half its current size. Leave the extraneous details for the biography.
 * 16) * The character is identified by name in the episode? Or does this take place in the episode commentary? Toprawa and Ralltiir 19:41, December 15, 2009 (UTC)
 * 17) **I believe the episode guide mentions the name, Tope.  JangFett  (Talk) 20:56, December 15, 2009 (UTC)
 * 18) ***The first-ID tag needs to be added, then. Toprawa and Ralltiir 20:58, December 15, 2009 (UTC)
 * 19) ****Done and done, I believe. Hopefully the into's a bit more to your liking, because I really can't see a way to get it shorter without creating nasty run-ons or removing important information. Darth Trayus  Sith_Emblem.svg ( Trayus Academy ) 01:42, December 19, 2009 (UTC)
 * 20) Sorry to butt into the review so late, but could you clarify one thing? The tooka doll was actually there the whole time, as you can see if you watch the episode closely, and the guide also clarifies it (sort of). However, on the other hand, the article leaves room for speculation that Page was somehow physically switched with the tooka doll in the crib, which should be fixed. Other than that, the article looks great.  CC7567  (talk) 08:01, December 19, 2009 (UTC)
 * 21) *My apologies, I didn't intend for that. It's been fixed, I believe. Darth Trayus  Sith_Emblem.svg ( Trayus Academy ) 08:08, December 19, 2009 (UTC)

Comments