Wookieepedia:Featured article nominations/Viqi Shesh


 * ''The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a featured article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Viqi "Vichy" Shesh

 * Nominated by: -- Harrar 14:02, 6 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: Cold-hearted collaborator. And guest nom for WP:NEGTC!

(5 Inqs/1 Users/6 Total/INQCON 5)
Support
 * 1) Image is beautiful now and it really is a great article. Dark Lord Trayus 23:57, 8 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 2) "Fascinating captain, and logical too." Thefourdotelipsis 08:53, 25 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 3) She's dead. Took a little tumble off the cliff.  Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 18:01, 24 May 2009 (UTC)
 * 4) Nice job. Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 23:34, 13 June 2009 (UTC)
 * 5) Impressive.  Chack Jadson  (Talk)  11:56, 15 June 2009 (UTC)
 * 6) Quite nice; quite impressive. &mdash;  Fiolli  {Alpheridies University ComNet} 21:29, 26 June 2009 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) The image you're using of Coruscant is from Episode II. It needs to be replaced by an image from a time closer to the events of Shesh's life. Perhaps this one - it is at least from the YV War. --Eyrezer 08:55, 22 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 2) *I'm going to cut images from this section entirely. While having a picture from 19 BBY is not cool, having a picture of a pitched battle doesn't work either. If only there was a picture of Coruscant all overgrown and gross. -- —Harrar  MR T.Lah.jpg ( Villip ) 09:02, 23 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 3) **Maybe a crop of the Japanese Traitor cover? (This isn't an objection, by the way, if you don't want it or it doesn't work.) - Lord Hydronium 20:21, 27 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 4) ***For some reason I completely forgot about the Japanese covers. I uploaded it and stuck it in. Feel free to move it around, anyone. Good call, Hydro. -- —Harrar  ( Villip ) 20:41, 27 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 5) ****I'm glad my objection helped unearth this image! --Eyrezer 04:14, 11 May 2009 (UTC)
 * 6) Four Dot:
 * 7) * "Coruscant fell to the Yuuzhan Vong warmaster just as Tsavong Lah had always planned and despite Shesh's earlier efforts to appease the invaders with Duro and the Jedi." - This sentence doesn't read right to me.
 * 8) ** Changed to: "Coruscant fell to the Yuuzhan Vong warmaster&mdash;just as Tsavong Lah had always intended&mdash;and Shesh's earlier efforts to appease the invaders by delivering Duro and the Jedi were shown to have been futile."
 * 9) * You seem to use Tsavong Lah's full name a lot. Is there any particular reason for this?
 * 10) ** Not particularly! Going through the article I removed 15+ Tsavongs, changing it to "Lah" or "Warmaster Lah" or "warmaster"
 * 11) * Is the quote in the Legacy of treason section attributed to the right source? I've never read Star by Star, but I would have thought that was from the NEC.
 * 12) ** Good spot; I'd copied the template from one of the other quotations and forgot to change the attribution.
 * 13) *Otherwise, utterly superb, and highly compelling. My only other complaint is that you've sourced a lot of self-sourcing statements in the Bts. Thefourdotelipsis 04:30, 25 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 14) **I removed the BtS sourcing. Thanks for your kind words, I really enjoyed writing it! -- —Harrar  MR T.Lah.jpg ( Villip ) 08:44, 25 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 15) From the Desk of Atarumaster88
 * 16) * Intro is a bit too play-by-play in the end of the second/beginning of third paragraph. Please shorten it a hair.
 * 17) **I took out some fluff; see what you think.
 * 18) * "During the subsequent reconstruction efforts, Shesh's family lost status" What type of status? A bit of clarification here.
 * 19) **Added "social and political" before "status" &mdash; is that alright?
 * 20) * You alternate between "senate" and Senate. Please make those consistent.
 * 21) **Used the "find" tool to track down all uses of senate and capitalized them, having looked at the Palpatine article for precedent.
 * 22) * Please specify which agency Kalenda belonged to rather than just describing her as an "Operative"
 * 23) **Added "New Republic Intelligence" before "Operative"
 * 24) *Partial review. Will continue later. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 21:07, 18 May 2009 (UTC)
 * 25) **Thanks for the (partial) review, cheers I know it's a long'un :P -- —Harrar  ( Villip ) 12:17, 19 May 2009 (UTC)
 * 26) * Is it "Kuat Drive Yards" or "the Kuat Drive Yards"?
 * 27) **An interesting point has been raised here, actually. Kuat Drive Yards is the company, whereas we don't seem to have an actual article for the shipyards themselves. I've standardised in to "Kuat Drive Yards" when talking about the company, and on the one occasion when I'd called the shipyards "the Kuat Drive Yards" I changed it to "the Kuat shipyards".
 * 28) * "Shesh was discussing affairs when the transmission was once" What type of affairs?
 * 29) **Unspecified, IIRC. I changed it to "discussing matters of the colony".
 * 30) * The end of the 4th paragraph of "Duro and the Jedi" strays a bit far from the subject matter of Viqi Shesh. Can you condense it a little?
 * 31) **Take a look at it to see what you think &mdash; I did some strimming and tried to direct things more towards Shesh, but you may think there's still too much extraneous info. The Duro anti-Jedi address is very important though.
 * 32) * "The case against Shesh was dropped following Pomt's death. Organa Solo's efforts struck a blow to the Kuati woman's anti-Jedi agitation." These two sentences don't flow well together. Can you tie them together or make a new paragraph?
 * 33) **"The case against Shesh was dropped following Pomt's death; nevertheless, Organa Solo's efforts to expose the senator had called Shesh's integrity into question. With knowledge of Shesh's possible corruption now public, the Appeasement Vote lost support&hellip;" -- —Harrar  ( Villip ) 18:16, 19 May 2009 (UTC)
 * 34) ***It reads much better now. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 16:35, 23 May 2009 (UTC)
 * 35) * Correct me if I'm wrong, but IU canon never italicizes worldship names. I think it would be best if we followed suit.
 * 36) **Hmm. I agree, I just saw in the CSWE that the Domain Dal worldship was referred to as Domain Dal. But this doesn't occur anywhere else, so I removed the italics. Perhaps Invasion will shed more light :)
 * 37) * "Silenced by the warmaster for this statement, as it constituted heresy for the Yuuzhan Vong, Shesh allowed Maal Lah to continue." A bit of clarification on exactly how this is heresy please.
 * 38) **"Silenced by the warmaster for this statement, as the discussion of hybrid machine and organic technology was considered heresy for the Yuuzhan Vong, Shesh allowed Maal Lah to continue." - tell me if that's too unwieldy.
 * 39) * Probably should mention the nisbat that allowed Ku to find her again.
 * 40) **Mentioned. "Ku revealed that he had tracked her down by means of an organic subcutaneous implant known as a nisbat which had been inserted into Shesh's body."
 * 41) *Finished. Good stuff. Have a Super Terrific Friendly Un-frustrating day. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 16:40, 23 May 2009 (UTC)
 * 42) **Thanks dude. You too! -- —Harrar  ( Villip ) 17:44, 23 May 2009 (UTC)
 * 43) Chack Attack:
 * 44) *I'm reading this in parts, so bear with me.
 * 45) * One thing I noticed in the intro: you refer to SELCORE without explaining what it is. You previously mentioned the committee without explaining its abbreviation. You need to do something to explain that SELCORE is the same thing as the Senate Subcommittee. You could just replace "SELCORE" with "the committee" or something. I was going to do it myself, but I couldn't decide which looked best.  Chack Jadson  (Talk) 00:10, 5 June 2009 (UTC)
 * 46) **I tried several variations on this, but they all included mdashes and capital letters, so in the end I removed the SELCORE abbreviation, which was only in the second paragraph, and changed the sentence to "The full extent of the Kuati woman's collaboration with the Yuuzhan Vong went undiscovered and, although the suspicions of her colleague Leia Organa Solo led to Shesh's loss of her seat on the refugee committee..." I hope this works. -- —Harrar  ( Cut the comm chatter ) 15:26, 5 June 2009 (UTC)
 * 47) * "When Lah brusquely brought matters to a close, Shesh decided to gain further favor and informed the warmaster of Jacen Solo's presence on Duro, along with the fact that the young Jedi was not currently using his abilities." Any particular reason he wanted Jacen?  Chack Jadson  (Talk) 13:45, 7 June 2009 (UTC)
 * 48) **Oh darnit. I've completely forgotten and have none of my books. Plus, reading what I wrote in the Tsavong Lah article doesn't help either, so now I'm really confused. I'm afraid this objection's going to have to stand until I can get back to the books, which will be around the 30th June&hellip;keep reviewing though and I'll address all the other stuff! :) -- —Harrar  ( Cut the comm chatter ) 20:07, 7 June 2009 (UTC)
 * 49) ***If I recall my Vong War correctly, it's the twin thing, if that helps, Harrar. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 18:16, 10 June 2009 (UTC)
 * 50) ****Hmmm no they don't discover that the Solos are twins until Star by Star, but that's on the right lines and jogged my memory, cheers Ataru. The answer to your objection, Chack, is that Lah has been informed by his priests that every Jedi he sacrifices to the gods improves his chances of success. The crucial fact is that she doesn't inform Lah of his name, which I didn't make clear. I changed it to: "When Lah brusquely brought matters to a close, Shesh decided to gain further favor with the warmaster by announcing that she would be able to orchestrate the abduction and delivery of a young Jedi Knight who was present on Duro, as she was aware of the warmaster's military interest in Force-sensitives. Shesh was referring to Jacen Solo, and although she mentioned that the young Human was not making use of his abilities, the Kuati senator did not mention Solo by name." I know it doesn't sound like the naming part is relevant, but its important to the plot as when Jacen attacks Tsavong Lah later, the warmaster doesn't know who he actually is. If I said it any other way, I'd be misrepresenting the text. I hope this is okay; if you don't feel I've elaborated enough, let the objection stand and I'll have sorted it for sure in 2 weeks :) -- —Harrar  ( Cut the comm chatter ) 00:10, 11 June 2009 (UTC)

Comments
 * Viqi Shesh is 100Kbs, yes, and the FA page is a bit choked but I figured I don't care how long she's up here for and she can be read in chunks. She's an odd character to write because we tend to see the manifestation of her actions rather than her actions a lot of the time. -- Harrar 14:02, 6 April 2009 (UTC)
 * That headshot of Viqi in the infobox looks really warped. At least on my computer it does. Xicer9 Atgar.svg( Rawr) 10:26, 7 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Its not just yours. It hurts my eyes. Dark Lord Trayus 19:49, 7 April 2009 (UTC)
 * I've been reliably informed by JMAS that this is due to the fact that Wikia has not yet updated its cache. It's the proper dimensions, but the cache needs updating. Harrar 22:26, 7 April 2009 (UTC)
 * I'm up through the fall of Coruscant, fyi. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 21:07, 18 May 2009 (UTC)
 * About one-third of the way through. Will finish within a few days as time permits. &mdash; Fiolli  {Alpheridies University ComNet} 04:03, 20 June 2009 (UTC)