Wookieepedia:Featured article nominations/Gloom Walkers


 * ''The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a featured article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Gloom Walkers

 * Nominated by:  IFYLOFD  ( You will pay the price for your lack of vision! ) 04:27, 21 July 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: Another part of FloydProject: Path of Destruction.

(5 Inqs/0 Users/5 Total/INQCON 5)
Support
 * 1)  Chack Jadson  (Talk)  13:05, 26 July 2009 (UTC)
 * 2) Nice job. Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 18:48, 5 August 2009 (UTC)
 * 3) &mdash;  Fiolli  {Alpheridies University ComNet} 02:20, 11 August 2009 (UTC)
 * 4)  CC7567  (talk) 17:28, September 7, 2009 (UTC)
 * 5) --  Darth Culator  (Talk) 02:53, September 16, 2009 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) Redlink in the intro.  Chack Jadson  (Talk)  12:53, 21 July 2009 (UTC)
 * 2) *Killed.  IFYLOFD  ( You will pay the price for your lack of vision! ) 20:51, 21 July 2009 (UTC)
 * 3) Few more things:
 * 4) * "reserved for important and difficult missions due to a high success rate." I'd mention then about Des being a beast, and the key to their success, then talking about the battles they fought in.
 * 5) **Addressed.
 * 6) * "Eventually, Dessel would become Dark Lord of the Sith Darth Bane". Unneeded in the intro, IMO.
 * 7) **Addressed.
 * 8) * You didn’t source two of your quotes. :P
 * 9) **BAH. Addressed.
 * 10) * Bit of context on the Brotherhood, at least in the body.
 * 11) **Addressed.
 * 12) *Good work.  Chack Jadson  (Talk) 15:35, 23 July 2009 (UTC)
 * 13) **Thanks for the review.  IFYLOFD  ( You will pay the price for your lack of vision! ) 05:40, 24 July 2009 (UTC)
 * 14) Pasta&hellip;
 * 15) *This one is pretty nicely done. A couple minor concerns:
 * 16) ** (1) Tense. Please go through and double check the use of the present conditional. Some of those phrases need to be in the past tense.
 * 17) ***Addressed.
 * 18) ** (2) Runons or near-runons. Again, there are a few sentences that are too compound. Not outright violations, at least, but sentences that could be split for better quality of work. Double check these when the tense is being fixed. Here are a few examples:
 * 19) ***"Commanded by Lieutenant Ulabore, the Gloom Walkers&hellip;"
 * 20) ****Addressed.
 * 21) *** "Over that next year, the Gloom Walkers&hellip;" (First of two. One is fine, but both juxtaposed reads longwindedly)
 * 22) ****Addressed.
 * 23) *** "Alone and surrounded by enemies, Lieutenant Ulabore panicked, and had no idea what to do to keep his unit alive without direct orders." (Comma usage also)
 * 24) ****Addressed.
 * 25) *&mdash; Fiolli  {Alpheridies University ComNet} 03:08, 8 August 2009 (UTC)
 * 26) **Thanks for the review.  IFYLOFD  ( You will pay the price for your lack of vision! ) 02:20, 10 August 2009 (UTC)
 * 27) Tis currently has an unsourced quote. --Eyrezer 23:09, 13 August 2009 (UTC)
 * 28) Attack of the Clone
 * 29) * "After a day of savage fighting that had left many dead on both sides, they retreated to opposite ends of the battlefield to regroup." Who, specifically, is "they"? It's unclear.
 * 30) **Addressed.
 * 31) * Please vary one of the "after"s in "Adanar".
 * 32) **Addressed.  IFYLOFD  ( You will pay the price for your lack of vision! ) 15:21, September 7, 2009 (UTC)
 * 33) *Please watch linking. Other than that, nice job.  CC7567  (talk) 02:09, 22 August 2009 (UTC)

Comments