Wookieepedia:Featured article nominations/Gara Petothel


 * ''The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a featured article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Gara Petothel

 * Nominated by: --Colinmcev 22:54, 26 July 2008 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: This one took a whole lot of work, but was very, very rewarding. Gara Petothel is a really fascinating character and I think you will find it enjoyable to read, despite the length. Thanks, all! --Colinmcev 22:54, 26 July 2008 (UTC)

(5 Inqs/0 Users/5 Total)
Support
 * 1) The Wraiths are great!  Atarumaster88  [[Image:Jedi_Order.svg|20px]] ( Talk page ) 00:33, 12 August 2008 (UTC)
 * 2) Really good.  Chack Jadson  (Talk)  16:02, 13 August 2008 (UTC)
 * 3) A nice compliment to WS's FAN. I read this a month ago, at least, and something else must have captured my attention elsewhere. Sorry for this late vote, Colin.  Greyman ( Talk ) 14:37, 9 October 2008 (UTC)
 * 4) Ridiculously in-depth. Cull Tremayne 02:34, 12 October 2008 (UTC)
 * 5) Quite good, but please look at the diffs from my multiple consecutive edits to see the technical issues you should be avoiding in the future. --  Darth Culator  (Talk) 04:39, 12 October 2008 (UTC)

Oppose
 * Second image needs to be on the left, and all the rest adjusted accordingly so they alternate from there. --Eyrezer 03:55, 2 August 2008 (UTC)
 * Deja vu. lol. Done. -- Colinmcev 22:40, 2 August 2008 (UTC)
 * 1) From the desk of Atarumaster88
 * 2) * Channeling Acky here, a standard mention of gender, homeworld, and species in the intro would be nice.
 * 3) **I threw them in. Let me know if that works. --Colinmcev 22:50, 6 August 2008 (UTC)
 * 4) * Any and all speculation about Donoslane Excursions has to go, aside from BtS. Until Aaron Allston or some other VIP confirms that, we can't say that for sure.
 * 5) **Removed the references from the top section and the Donos relationship section. Unfortunately, if I'm not mistaken, even if Allston confirms it, we can't really put it in because it's not canon until it's expressed in an official work. Sort of a pain in the ass, but it is what it is, I guess. -- Colinmcev 22:50, 6 August 2008 (UTC)
 * 6) ***Well, if Allston said that the naming of "Donoslane Excursions" is intentional and what we all know it means, that would confirm that they got together later and made the company at some point. But, moot point for now. Atarumaster88  [[Image:Jedi_Order.svg|20px]] ( Talk page ) 20:42, 11 August 2008 (UTC)
 * 7) * "Petothel was taught how to develop and live various identities" Reword.
 * 8) **Better? -- Colinmcev 22:50, 6 August 2008 (UTC)
 * 9) * The Imperial Intelligence training is a bit redundant compared with the previous section. A lot of this would be better off in the P&T.
 * 10) **I cut some of it; generally, I tried to keep the parts where the instructors specifically TAUGHT her something, and removed the other little bits. Many of what I cut were already in P&T so, yeah, you're right, redundant. Let me know if you think more trims are needed. --Colinmcev 22:50, 6 August 2008 (UTC)
 * 11) * The Zsinj/Trigit introduction is sort of confusing.
 * 12) **Could you tell me which intro is confusing, and what's confusing about it?
 * 13) ***Re-read it; it's fine. Atarumaster88  [[Image:Jedi_Order.svg|20px]] ( Talk page ) 20:42, 11 August 2008 (UTC)
 * 14) * "created to help relieve pressure from the elite Rogue Squadron." I don't recall that being the point of the Talons.
 * 15) **I think I got that from the Wook's Talon Squadron entry, so we should probably remove that there. -- Colinmcev 01:48, 7 August 2008 (UTC)
 * 16) * "that arguably saved Implacable and its crew from capture" The word "arguably" is generally POV.
 * 17) **Dropped it. -- Colinmcev 01:48, 7 August 2008 (UTC)
 * 18) * "She programmed both Imperial and Rebel holos to provide incorrect information about Gara Petothel" clarify this.
 * 19) ** This is all the book says about it. I guess we could drop it if it's really that confusing? -- Colinmcev 01:48, 7 August 2008 (UTC)
 * 20) * Please watch your possessives when it comes to ship names. The preferred convention is Implacable ' s crew, not Implacable crew. I have fixed several of these but might have missed some.
 * 21) ** I fixed them where I saw them, I think it's cool now. -- Colinmcev 01:48, 7 August 2008 (UTC)
 * 22) * I feel the Exposing Atton Repness section could be slimmed down a little. It's almost play-by-play.
 * 23) **I shortened it a bit; is it OK or do you think it needs more? -- Colinmcev 01:48, 7 August 2008 (UTC)
 * 24) * Please, never call the Mon Remonda the Remonda.
 * 25) **lol Alright. -- Colinmcev 01:48, 7 August 2008 (UTC)
 * 26) * "they very impressed with what seemed a promising start to a young career," Missing verb.
 * 27) **Oops. Fixed. -- Colinmcev 01:48, 7 August 2008 (UTC)
 * 28) * I'm not sure the bit about Sarkin's confession is pertinent. I'll leave that to your judgment though.
 * 29) **Yeah, I'm with you. Cut it. -- Colinmcev 01:48, 7 August 2008 (UTC)
 * 30) * Second paragraph of switching allegiances could be slimmed down. It's more of a P&T type paragraph.
 * 31) **Shortened it significantly. -- Colinmcev 01:48, 7 August 2008 (UTC)
 * 32) * In that section, you state that she realized Zsinj is dishonorable several times. While I understand that it's a recurring motif with her, please tone those down.
 * 33) **I looked back and could really only find it in one reference in this section, plus once in the photo caption. If there are others there I'm missing, I'd say you can go ahead and cut them, or point them out to me and I'l go back and do it. -- Colinmcev 01:48, 7 August 2008 (UTC)
 * 34) * The crisis of identity section, while solid overall, is definitely play-by-play and needs a small diet to keep it from being overweight in terms of detail.
 * 35) **I cut some of the play-by-play stuff. Better? -- Colinmcev 01:48, 7 August 2008 (UTC)
 * 36) * Contextify the tracker program on Razor's Kiss. I mean, it was Castin Donn's. All she did was modify it, no?
 * 37) **Done. -- Colinmcev 01:48, 7 August 2008 (UTC)
 * 38) * I actually think Growing closer to the Wraiths could use more detail on Mission to Saffalore.
 * 39) **I added some more detail, but still tried to keep it a bit light, since her role in this mission wasn't particularly crucial, and since it played a very small part in her overall story. -- Colinmcev 01:48, 7 August 2008 (UTC)
 * 40) * Infiltrating Iron Fist is also a bit play-by-play.
 * 41) **Switched it around a bit. -- Colinmcev 01:48, 7 August 2008 (UTC)
 * 42) * "Knowing Zsinj's famous tendency to be cheap," Reword this.
 * 43) **It got dropped in the above objection, so I think this is moot now. -- Colinmcev 01:48, 7 August 2008 (UTC)
 * 44) * The Stellar Web was not, in fact, a New Republic vessel. "New Republic-aligned" might work instead, but I will leave that to your discretion.
 * 45) **Hmm...I couldn't find Stellar Web in my article. If I'm missing it, though, you can add the "-aligned" to it. I'm fine with that. --Colinmcev 01:48, 7 August 2008 (UTC)
 * 46) * The Legacy section is a little Original Research-y, unless you recall somewhere that nobody else ever knew. I thought the others learned of her messages.
 * 47) **Unless I'm missing something big, I believe most of the Wraiths did NOT know she was alive. However, since the fact that Solo and Antilles constitutes a cover-up, I am confident in saying her part in Iron Fist remained secret, and that most of New Republic wasn't aware of her actions. I left those parts in...HOWEVER, I cut most of the references to the Wraiths. Even if there was no specific mention of the Wraiths learning what she did, I can't definitively say they never learned it later, so I dropped it. -- Colinmcev 01:48, 7 August 2008 (UTC)
 * 48) ***That's fair enough. The main reason I objected was because for sure, Garik Loran, Shalla Nelprin, and Myn Donos heard about her messages. Atarumaster88  [[Image:Jedi_Order.svg|20px]] ( Talk page ) 20:42, 11 August 2008 (UTC)
 * 49) * Rearrange the personality and traits section until it flows more chronologically. Since she has these identity crises, I might even segregate the P&T into 3 subsections for Petothel, Notsil, and Slane, if that would help you organize it.
 * 50) **I think it's all chronological now. -- Colinmcev 01:48, 7 August 2008 (UTC)
 * 51) * "attractive-looking" is POV.
 * 52) **Well, the word attractive came from the book and other characters perceptions. I added something that the characters found her attractive, so it wouldn't be POV. -- Colinmcev 01:48, 7 August 2008 (UTC)
 * 53) * I would cut the relationships section on Phanan and maybe Loran. Neither were romantically involved with her, but if you are using Relationships in a broader sense, Loran can stay, since he was her wingman.
 * 54) **I thought they were appropriate for inclusion since the Mara Jade entry has a Lando Calrissian relationship entry, even though the attraction in that "relationship" was completely one-sided. Nevertheless, I removed Loran and Phanan from there, since my understanding is the relationships section is for romantic relationships. -- Colinmcev 22:50, 6 August 2008 (UTC)
 * 55) ***Good job on this, but I would put back the sentence about Phanan flirting with her in bio. Atarumaster88  [[Image:Jedi_Order.svg|20px]] ( Talk page ) 20:42, 11 August 2008 (UTC)
 * 56) ****Done. -- Colinmcev 00:13, 12 August 2008 (UTC)
 * 57) *Have a Super Terrific Friendly Un-frustrating day. Atarumaster88  [[Image:Jedi_Order.svg|20px]] ( Talk page ) 18:21, 6 August 2008 (UTC)
 * 58) **Thanks much! -- Colinmcev 01:48, 7 August 2008 (UTC)

Comments
 * NOTE: Just so you all know, I am going off to get married and honeymooned and whatnot, so I will be out of commission on the Wook until Oct. 8 at the earliest. If there are any objections that need my attention, I'll take care of them upon my return, so please don't boot the article until after that time. Thanks all! -- Colinmcev 04:20, 25 September 2008 (UTC)
 * Back. -- Colinmcev 23:30, 7 October 2008 (UTC)
 * I have to give a shout out to Atarumaster's awesome Wraith Squadron article (also nominated for an FA), which I used frequently as a reference while working on this one. Great stuff, man! --Colinmcev 23:01, 26 July 2008 (UTC)
 * Thanks. :-D Atarumaster88  [[Image:Jedi_Order.svg|20px]] ( Talk page ) 01:15, 27 July 2008 (UTC)
 * A few things worth noting... --Colinmcev 22:54, 26 July 2008 (UTC)
 * Gara Petothel changes her identity periodically, but the two major, permanent changes are when she goes from Gara to Lara Notsil upon joining Wraith Squadron, then from Lara Notsil to Kirney Slane upon leaving. I decided to approach this in the article by using whatever name corresponds with that period in her life; for example, when she becomes Kirney Slane, I start referring to her as Slane instead of Notsil. I was worried this approach might be confusing, but I think it works since all three names are identified in the first sentence of the article. I'm open to suggestions. --Colinmcev 22:54, 26 July 2008 (UTC)
 * Also, although Aaron Allston clearly means to indicate Gara and Myn Donos end up together in Betrayal, it was tricky to describe this since I don't think the reference can technically be considered canon. I did the best I could to explain Donoslane Excursions and their future together despite this. --Colinmcev 22:54, 26 July 2008 (UTC)
 * Link spam: we could find out if we interviewed him. Atarumaster88  [[Image:Jedi_Order.svg|20px]] ( Talk page ) 01:15, 27 July 2008 (UTC)
 * A question: there are lots of fanfic pictures of Gara/Lara/Kirney at Aaron Allston's official Web site. I know fanfics are not allowed, but since Allston put them on his official site, I'd venture to argue that this means the author has sanctioned them, and this gives them an official sort of status. I haven't used any of the fanfic pics in this article, but would like to and will do so if the majority of Wookieepedians agree with me. But I'll go with whatever decision the consensus reaches... --Colinmcev 22:54, 26 July 2008 (UTC)
 * Personally, I would be wary of using them. We had a policy against it in the past . . . if, say, Joe Corroney, had some unofficial pictures of Lara, that might be worth a BtS image. Atarumaster88  [[Image:Jedi_Order.svg|20px]] ( Talk page ) 01:15, 27 July 2008 (UTC)