Wookieepedia:Featured article nominations/Diergu-Rea Duhnes'rd


 * ''The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a featured article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

(5 Inqs/1 User/6 Total)
Support
 * 1) -- AdmirableAckbar (Talk) 20:57, 17 April 2008 (UTC)
 * 2)  Graestan ( Talk ) 00:50, 22 April 2008 (UTC)
 * 3) --  Darth Culator  (Talk) 02:58, 22 April 2008 (UTC)
 * 4) Toprawa and Ralltiir 06:38, 22 April 2008 (UTC)
 * 5) Interesting stuff! Thefourdotelipsis 11:32, 23 April 2008 (UTC)
 * 6) Imperialles 19:05, 23 April 2008 (UTC)

Oppose
 * 1) Toprawa:
 * 2) * Please specify, if possible, how many others were aboard their ship, or otherwise specify somehow that others were lost. This kind of reads strange without it: "The Corellians' wave-skimmer had hit a cluster of rocks, and between the jagged rocks and the carnivorous melk, only two males named Hanugar and Sevik were left in one piece."
 * 3) * In the previous sentence, no one is mentioned besides the Corellians. This is essentially saying the downed Corellians took themselves aboard the starship. Please reword: "They took the two aboard their sail barge," Toprawa and Ralltiir
 * 4) **Done and done. -- AdmirableAckbar (Talk) 20:27, 21 April 2008 (UTC)
 * 5) From the squalid cubicle of Graestan:
 * 6) * "the two became both lovers and bounty hunting partners, proving immensely successful" – You might want to clarify that they were successful as bounty hunters only, leaving the lovers bit out.
 * 7) * Some context for K'zk in the intro, please.
 * 8) * "subterranean caves" is redundant.
 * 9) * "a chance to potentially" is also redundant.
 * 10) * "The Qwohogs told Duhnes'rd and Solum'ke of a massive coral outcropping, located on the far side of the Great Zelosi Sea, named Zelosian's Chine, where it was alleged that a great treasure of crystals and jewelry was hidden in caves, left there by a long dead Zelosian merchant prince two hundred years earlier." – This may well be the longest sentence by someone aside from Cicero that I've ever read. :P Please break it up.
 * 11) * "the tides were far too high to enter the caves without drowning" – Please reword, indicating something besides the tides drowning.
 * 12) * "the Qwohogs waited anxiously on the sail barge. They entered the cave" – I removed the extra "while," but I think you should reword these sentences so it doesn't sound as though the Qwohogs went.
 * 13) * Graestan ( Talk ) 01:09, 21 April 2008 (UTC)
 * 14) **All addressed. -- AdmirableAckbar (Talk) 20:27, 21 April 2008 (UTC)

Comments


 * Not listing this as an opposing point, because I may be the one confused here, but there seems to be some duplication in the refs and the appearances/sources. I think even under the rules proposed by the new CT they'd still only be one entry. -- Darth Culator  (Talk) 19:29, 19 April 2008 (UTC)
 * The info reffed to the Journal comes from the little character blurbs in the Journal, which aren't included with the story in the reprints; at least in my opinion, it thus can't really be considered part of Day of the Sepulchral Night. If that makes sense. -- AdmirableAckbar (Talk) 19:40, 19 April 2008 (UTC)
 * Awesome use of "wild bantha chase," by the way. ;) Toprawa and Ralltiir 21:54, 20 April 2008 (UTC)