Wookieepedia:Featured article nominations/Myneyrsh

Myneyrsh

 * Nominated by: NaruHina  Talk Anakinsolo.png 21:52, April 18, 2010 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: An FGAN that lost it's status because it had no Bts.

Support

 * 1) Thank you for another species! --Skippy Farlstendoiro 06:56, April 20, 2010 (UTC)
 * 2) ~ SavageBob 20:12, May 9, 2010 (UTC)
 * 3) Thefourdotelipsis 03:22, May 25, 2010 (UTC)
 * 4) Jinzler 22:19, May 30, 2010 (UTC)

Prepare to be savaged...

 * Just on a preliminary look, the BTS could be beefed up further. They were first mentioned in Zahn, but when was their background, culture, etc. first described and by whom? When were they first graphically depicted? Have their graphic depictions varied over time? How have the various RPGs treated them with relation to Humans (stronger? nimbler? quicker?). The article's in pretty good shape otherwise, but I'll look at the other sections next and report back here. :) ~ SavageBob 22:39, April 18, 2010 (UTC)
 * Expanded. Thank you very much for the ideas. NaruHina  Talk Anakinsolo.png 01:24, April 21, 2010 (UTC)
 * It looks better, but there are still some problems. First, I don't think the discrepancy in their appearance in the comics and the game supplements counts as a retcon. Rather, I would take it as simply two possible phenotypes for the Myneyrshi species, much like Land Calrissian doesn't look much like Palpatine, yet both are Humans. I think, as well, that the West End Games supplements were the first graphic depiction of the species, not the comic books (I'd guess they were first pictured in The Last Command Sourcebook]]. Also, please include the name of the artist who first illustrated them. Finally, please add some information on Myneyrshi character stats in the Wizards of the Coast version of the RPG. Good work so far, look forward to more ~ SavageBob 04:01, April 23, 2010 (UTC)
 * I'veadded the WotC material and am woirking on getting the TLCS, but I'm not sure we can assume that that is a variation. Myneyrshi are recognized galaxy-wide (despite the forgetting of their planet) as a blue, glass covered being. The comic depiction has them as yellow with flesh as their outer-most layer, and without a snout. With Human and other species where the only difference between certain races is skin tone, they still retain the features and traits of the species. If they had the glass skin/snout or even just the latter, it would be different. NaruHina  Talk Anakinsolo.png 04:42, April 28, 2010 (UTC)
 * I just noticed that pic was from the Sourcebook, which is completely unfindable FSR. Added that it was their first graphic depiction. However, it's my understanding they didn't credit each individual picture to the artists back then, so I'm not sure how to find out which illistrator made it. The depictin in the comics wasn't a retcon, but more likely just a continuity/coloring error on the part of the drafter. NaruHina  Talk Anakinsolo.png 01:32, April 29, 2010 (UTC)
 * It's looking much better! Be careful about quoting game statistics too literally; most people don't understand what +2 to this or -2 to that means in real terms; I've fixed this for you. Also, be careful of UAA's lists of names; they are not "common" names, but "sample" names; I went ahead and made the change. As for my objections above, I would still like to see you name some authors and artists in "Behind the scenes." Who wrote them up in The Last Command Sourcebook? Who drew them for the first time? Who drew them incorrectly in the comic book? Because these people have played key roles in developing the species, I feel they deserve to be called out by name. As for the different appearance, I'm still inclined to say that because The Last Command comic book is a canon source, its depiction of the Myneyrshi is canon and should be reflected in the article. I'd like to hear what others think about this, though, so I'm open to counter-arguments! ~ SavageBob 01:59, April 29, 2010 (UTC)
 * Sorry; I didn't realize you had already replied as to the artist ID of the WEG sourcebook illustrator. I just checked my copy, and the original Myneyrshi illustration was done by David Plunkett. Hope this helps! ~ SavageBob 02:04, April 29, 2010 (UTC)
 * I've added all the artists and the writers. I think that the comic should be treated like a movie comic in respect to the difference. When there is no contradiction to the source material, it can be considered canon, while if there is one it cannot. This is similar to the differences in the duels of ROTS, like Windu v. Palpy or the Duel on Mustafar. NaruHina  Talk Anakinsolo.png 17:29, May 1, 2010 (UTC)
 * OK, only the variant appearance issue remains unresolved. I've asked some other folks from WP:A to weigh in, as I still feel the comic version of the species should be considered canon, but I can see your reasoning too. Hopefully I'll be able to support soon enough once some more people give their opinions. :) ~ SavageBob 18:27, May 1, 2010 (UTC)
 * Eyrezer says he things the variant appearance should be considered an error, and Skippy's already supported, so I defer. Good work, and thanks for the guest nom! ~ SavageBob 20:12, May 9, 2010 (UTC)
 * No, thank you for your review. NaruHina  Talk Anakinsolo.png 03:45, May 10, 2010 (UTC)

Farlstendoiro thanks you for your guest nom to WP:AS

 * Intro: "strange blue crystalline flesh". Strange = NPOV ?
 * Definite POV.
 * Question: Why don't you link "knives" to combat knife?
 * I knew there had to be an article on knives somewhere.
 * Society: "their planetary neighbors, the Psadan" <- This might be understood as the people living in the neighboring planet. Maybe you should reword it?
 * Fixed. NaruHina  Talk Anakinsolo.png 23:50, April 19, 2010 (UTC)
 * "The Psadans were an unintelligent species" <- Sounds as if they were non-sentients. Maybe you could say "primitive" or "more primitive" or something?
 * Fixed.
 * "[C'baoth] tried to Force the Myneyrshi and the Psadan to cohabitate" Why do you use a capital F? You mean he used the Force to coerce them? Is it appropiate to use "the Force" as a verb?
 * It was a caps mistake.
 * History: In the first paragraph you talk about "the exploratory vessel" before telling us about it. What exploratory vessel? Maybe it could be solved simply saying "an exploratory vessel"?
 * Fixed.
 * "although thousands fled the war-torn planet, the Myneyrshi refused to leave their homeworld." So no Myneyrshi left? It was thousands of the other species inhabiting Wayland? Could you please specify this?
 * Fixed.
 * "As the only native species of Wayland" The article says that Psadans are also a native species of Wayland ("another of Wayland's sentient species" in the intro). Contradiction; please change one.
 * Fixed.
 * Made some edits to reorder sources; instead of [2][1][8] now it's [1][2][8], hope you don't mind. Skippy Farlstendoiro 10:15, April 19, 2010 (UTC)
 * I don't. Thank you. NaruHina  Talk Anakinsolo.png 23:50, April 19, 2010 (UTC)

Imperialles
File:Myneyrshi.JPG is in violation of rule #4. A re-scan wouldn't hurt, either, if you can find someone with a copy. --Imperialles 13:24, April 19, 2010 (UTC)
 * Done, though the scan I found is about the same quality. NaruHina  Talk Anakinsolo.png 23:22, April 26, 2010 (UTC)

Eyrezer:

 * "One of the species that the mad clone Joruus C'baoth kept under his rule from a secret Imperial storehouse inside Mount Tantiss, the Myneyrshi were nearly wiped out by the Yuuzhan Vong during the Yuuzhan Vong Invasion, despite uniting with the Psadan in a failed attempt to fight off the invaders." Can you split this sentence? It seems to suggest a link between being ruled by C'baoth and being attacked by the Vong when there isn't a link.
 * Fixed. NaruHina  Talk Anakinsolo.png 01:06, May 13, 2010 (UTC)
 * "Their experience with the Imperial occupation of Wayland after that," This is a bit of a fragment. Can you change it?
 * Fixed. NaruHina  Talk Anakinsolo.png 01:06, May 13, 2010 (UTC)
 * "defiant of technology" Can you reword this?
 * Reworded. NaruHina  Talk Anakinsolo.png 01:06, May 13, 2010 (UTC)
 * The Society and culture section could do with some reorganising. I've tried to add some subsections to give it a bit more structure, but it is still a bit shuffled. For instance, you discuss them being ostinate at the start, and then strong willed towards the end. Can you group these parts together?
 * Addressed. NaruHina  Talk Anakinsolo.png 01:29, May 13, 2010 (UTC)
 * Likewise, the first paragraph of the History should come after discussion of the Myneyrshi war with the Psadans that is said to precede it.
 * Fixed. NaruHina  Talk Anakinsolo.png 01:06, May 13, 2010 (UTC)
 * Have a look at the edit I made to the start of the history section. Although only small, it ensures this section starts at the beginning, if you will, rather than jumping straight into their later wars. It is a good idea to make sure each section has its own kind of introduction like this. --Eyrezer 10:39, May 25, 2010 (UTC)
 * I hope you don't mind, but I've rearranged the images so that the only pic of The Last Command Myneyrshi is in the BTS. --Eyrezer 09:33, May 12, 2010 (UTC)
 * I don't mind. Thanks. NaruHina  Talk Anakinsolo.png 01:06, May 13, 2010 (UTC)
 * "offering of a fowl as satnachakka" Are there any details on how/where/when this occurred? Also, "While the bird was elevated on the spire": can you explain what the spire is?
 * Done. NaruHina  Talk Anakinsolo.png 18:51, May 16, 2010 (UTC)
 * "Another Myneyrshi ritual was the presentation of a ritual staff, a gesture to show unity and friendship." Can you provide examples of when this occurred?
 * Done. NaruHina  Talk Anakinsolo.png 18:51, May 16, 2010 (UTC)
 * Can we get an article for the Myneyrsh from MedStar I: Battle Surgeons?
 * Sure.
 * He also needs to be mentioned in this article... --Eyrezer 05:08, May 17, 2010 (UTC)
 * In what context? He's not particularly notable IU. NaruHina  Talk Anakinsolo.png 23:36, May 17, 2010 (UTC)
 * It doesn't matter whether he is notable IU. An appropriate place would be the Myneyrshi in the galaxy section. --Eyrezer 08:04, May 18, 2010 (UTC)
 * Added. NaruHina  Talk Anakinsolo.png 02:48, May 25, 2010 (UTC)
 * "However, when the Human colonists crashed on Wayland, they became the new enemy." This is written as though the colonists have already been introduced in the article. Can you introduce this event more directly? And is there any indication of when this occurred? --Eyrezer 00:35, May 14, 2010 (UTC)
 * Added.
 * Can you add some more info on Txer to the MitG section? It feels rather skimpy at the moment. Similarly, there should be some information in the History section from Emissary of the Void. --Eyrezer 10:48, May 25, 2010 (UTC)
 * Added. NaruHina  Talk Anakinsolo.png 15:35, May 30, 2010 (UTC)

Hmm.

 * Does the intro really have to be that long?
 * Shortened enough? NaruHina  Talk Anakinsolo.png 02:48, May 25, 2010 (UTC)
 * That'll do. It was mainly a cosmetic thing. Thefourdotelipsis
 * Is "youngling" really a colloquial term for all children? Even if so, is there any particular reason for using "youngling"?
 * Changed to children. NaruHina  Talk Anakinsolo.png 02:48, May 25, 2010 (UTC)
 * Should "satnachakka" be a link?
 * No, it's just their word for peace offering. 02:48, May 25, 2010 (UTC)
 * The first few sentences of the "History" section read strangely, as you say "Before Human colonists arrived, blah blah blah. However, Human colonists arrived..." Probably needs a bit of tweaking there.
 * How about now?
 * The history section doesn't mention Luke Skywalker at all, despite the illustration. Isn't there more to be said about Skywalker's visit, and the destruction of Mount Tantiss?
 * Added. NaruHina  Talk Anakinsolo.png 02:48, May 25, 2010 (UTC)
 * "During the Yuuzhan Vong War, the extra-galactic species" - which extra-galactic species? Needs rephrasing.
 * Rephrased
 * Just a comment: you use a Legacy quote to summarize the later subsection. This is a bit jarring... is there not a better, more general quote for the earlier portion of the "History" section?
 * Changed. NaruHina  Talk Anakinsolo.png 02:48, May 25, 2010 (UTC)
 * That's all. Thefourdotelipsis 10:04, May 24, 2010 (UTC)

Jinzler

 * Can you find out if they have an entry in The Complete Star Wars Encyclopedia? --Jinzler 18:04, May 30, 2010 (UTC)
 * No worries, I see that Savage Bob has now added this as a source, and said in his edit summary that it has no new info --Jinzler 22:19, May 30, 2010 (UTC)

Comments

 * Yes, the Bts is very short. There really isn't much of anything to note about these guys.
 * In nominating this article, have you checked through all the original sources or just added the Bts? As nominator, you need to be able to verify it contains all information, and not just rely on the work of its original GA nominator to have done their job. --Eyrezer 02:21, April 19, 2010 (UTC)
 * I did check the sources, with the exceptions of the RPG suppliments as they'd completely slipped my mind. I'll rectify that as soon as possible. NaruHina  Talk Anakinsolo.png 23:50, April 19, 2010 (UTC)
 * Can you include an image from Legacy showing how the species is depicted there? Either a normal one or a mutated one could be helpful to the article. ~ SavageBob 04:03, April 23, 2010 (UTC)
 * Is how the one appears on the cover of Monster, Part 2 an accurate depiction? NaruHina Talk Anakinsolo.png 23:22, April 26, 2010 (UTC)
 * Yeah, that's an accurate depiction of their monstrous, Vongformed look. You could use that one. ~ SavageBob 01:59, April 29, 2010 (UTC)