Wookieepedia:Featured article nominations/Knight Hammer


 * ''The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a featured article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Knight Hammer

 * Nominated by: Lord Hydronium 08:05, April 28, 2010 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: Take that, Tranner!

(4 Inqs/3 Users/7 Total)
Support
 * 1) Xicer9 [[Image:atgar.svg|20px]]( Combadge) 04:13, April 29, 2010 (UTC)
 * 2) Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 19:26, May 6, 2010 (UTC)
 * 3)  IFYLOFD  ( Floyd's crib ) 23:35, May 10, 2010 (UTC)
 * 4)  Jonjedigrandmaster  ( Talk ) 21:38, May 23, 2010 (UTC)
 * 5) Thefourdotelipsis 00:58, May 26, 2010 (UTC)
 * 6) Reviewed everyone's objections, seen that they had been addressed, did a typo hunt, found none, did an "it's" usage hunt, found no incorrect usage, looks good to me.  Trak Nar  Ramble on 04:26, May 26, 2010 (UTC)
 * 7) Green Tentacle (Talk) 18:26, May 26, 2010 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) Just a few things...
 * 2) * You should very briefly mention the Battle of Endor and the warlordism that occurred afterward somewhere in the beginning of the History section, otherwise I don't have much context on why Delvarus "established his own personal satrapy" or why Daala wanted to "reunite the fragments of the Empire."
 * 3) * Could you link Battle for Yavin 4 somewhere in the body?
 * 4) * Do you know whether the Victories were I or II class models? The current link leads to a disambig. Similar deal with the Imperials.
 * 5) * Could you find some quotes for the body, if possible?
 * 6) * Could you beef up the Bts by a few sentences? Maybe just mention some of the other sources its been referenced in?
 * 7) *Otherwise, nice work. Can't wait to see the next Exie you guys will work on. Xicer9 [[Image:atgar.svg|20px]]( Combadge) 17:33, April 28, 2010 (UTC)
 * 8) **All addressed or discussed in IRC. Thanks for the review. - Lord Hydronium 04:04, April 29, 2010 (UTC)
 * 9) Tranner takes that, and raises you a few objections:
 * 10) * More context on the Galactic Voyager in the intro and body, please.
 * 11) **Of what sort were you thinking? Both already establish it as Ackbar's ship.
 * 12) ***Mentioning that it was a Mon Calamari cruiser would be fine. Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 19:23, May 5, 2010 (UTC)
 * 13) ****Added.
 * 14) * If I recall correctly, an article was recently created for Delvardus's fortress world. Please link to that.
 * 15) **Done.
 * 16) * Is the system where the Night Hammer was located the same as the system in which Delvardus's fortress world was located? The wording isn't very clear on this.
 * 17) **Clarified.
 * 18) * Is there an article for the Battle of Khomm that Cronus participated in? If so, it should be linked to. If not, an article should be created and then linked to.
 * 19) **Added.
 * 20) * Lastly, I seem to remember the reason for the name change as a pun on the term "Jedi Knight." Does Darksaber allude to this at all?
 * 21) **Well, it's not really said out loud. The fact that it's a joke related to the Jedi is there, and I've made the Jedi connection more obvious in the body. I figure that sticks close enough to what's in the source while implying the obvious to the reader.
 * 22) *** Just one more thing, then: "as a symbol of her planned destruction of the New Republic through the Jedi" can be a bit misleading (i.e., it could suggest that Daala planned to use Jedi Knights to attack the New Republic). Please reword this to clarify that the Jedi would be destroyed as well. Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 19:23, May 5, 2010 (UTC)
 * 23) ****Fixed and got to use the word "annihilation". - Lord Hydronium 05:31, May 6, 2010 (UTC)
 * 24) *Not bad. The SSD competition continues. Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 20:08, May 4, 2010 (UTC)
 * 25) **Thanks for the review. - Lord Hydronium 04:10, May 5, 2010 (UTC)
 * 26) Attack of the Floyd:
 * 27) * "This was made possible by a network of highly redundant automated command systems. " How exactly were they redundant? Clarify.
 * 28) **I would assume in the engineering sense of the term, but the specifics of the redundancy aren't clarified: "Though it was immense, the Night Hammer functioned with a relatively small crew, relying on massively redundant automated command systems." That's all Darksaber says on the subject. - Lord Hydronium 00:09, May 10, 2010 (UTC)
 * 29) *That's all. Nice job.  IFYLOFD  ( Floyd's crib )
 * 30) From the Chron-O-John of Green Tentacle:
 * 31) * The battle of Yavin 4: Last paragraph has three consecutive sentences starting with "Daala." Reword one if possible.
 * 32) * The size of the crew is mentioned in description but it seems worth repeating in commanders and crew too. Green Tentacle (Talk) 20:24, May 25, 2010 (UTC)
 * 33) **Addressed, and thanks. - Lord Hydronium 01:05, May 26, 2010 (UTC)

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