Wookieepedia:Featured article nominations

 The featured articles of the wiki are articles that represent the best Wookieepedia has to offer. This is not a way to showcase the articles of your favorite characters, spaceships, or the like.


 * Featured article history
 * Featured article queue
 * Featured article nominations history
 * FA queue checklist
 * What is a featured article?

So just what makes a featured article? Well, we've prepared a list just in case someone should ask that, and it is as follows.

An article must&hellip;


 * 1) &hellip;be well-written and detailed.
 * 2) &hellip;be unbiased, non-point of view.
 * 3) &hellip;be sourced with all available sources and appearances.
 * 4) &hellip;follow the Manual of Style, Layout Guide, and all other policies on Wookieepedia.
 * 5) &hellip;following the review process, be stable, i.e. it does not change significantly from day to day and is not the subject of ongoing edit wars. This does not apply to vandalism and protection or semi-protection as a result of vandalism.
 * 6) &hellip;not be tagged with any sort of improvement tags (i.e. more sources, expand, etc).
 * 7) &hellip;have a proper lead that gives a good summary of the topic and can be used for the front page featured box.
 * 8) &hellip;have no more than 3 redlinks and none in the introduction, infobox, or any templates.
 * 9) &hellip;have significant information from all sources and appearances, especially a biography for character articles.
 * 10) &hellip;not have been previously featured on the Main Page. Otherwise, it can only be restored to featured status.
 * 11) &hellip;be completely referenced for all available material and sources. See Sourcing for more information.
 * 12) &hellip;have all quotes and images sourced.
 * 13) &hellip;provide at least one quote on the article. A leading quote at the beginning of the article will be required only if there is quotable dialogue by or about the subject. Although quotes may be placed in the body of the article, a maximum of one quote is allowed at the beginning of each section.
 * 14) &hellip;include a "personality and traits" section on all character articles.
 * 15) &hellip;include a "powers and abilities" section on all relevant character articles, especially for Force-sensitive characters where said powers and/or abilities are stipulated.
 * 16) &hellip;include a reasonable number of images of sufficient quality to illustrate the article, if said images are available.
 * 17) &hellip;pass review by the Inquisitorius review panel.
 * 18) &hellip;counting the introduction and "Behind the scenes" material, be at least 1000 words long (not including captions, quotes, or headers, etc).

For more information on what makes a featured article, see What is a featured article?

How to nominate:


 * 1) First, nominate an article you find is worthy of featured status, putting it at the bottom of the list below; see criteria above. Note that a previously featured article cannot be featured on the Main Page again; however, it can be restored to featured status.
 * 2) Others will object to the nomination if they disagree that the article is good enough; they will then supply reasons for doing so, and ways to improve the article (errors, style, organization, images, notability, sources).
 * 3) Supporters adjust the article until the objectors (with reasonable objections) are satisfied.
 * 4) The article is placed on the featured article list and added to the front page queue.
 * 5) Also, if, at least a week after the article's nomination, that article has 5 Inquisitor supports and no objections (or the objections have been stricken or overridden), it will be added to the queue, and will be officially known as a "featured article."
 * 6) Be sure to place sign in the "Nominated by" line when the nomination is posted for voting.

How to vote:

Also remember to add FAnom at the top of the article you are nominating.
 * 1) Before doing anything, be sure to read the article completely, keeping a sharp eye out for mistakes.
 * 2) Afterwards, compare the article to the criteria listed above, and then either support or object the article's nomination.
 * 3) If you object, please supply concrete reasons for doing so, and how it can be improved. Please cite which rule your objection falls under! Failure to do so will result in your objection being considered invalid.
 * 4) As stated above, any objections will be looked upon by the nominator, supporters, and anyone willing to improve the article, and action will be taken to please the objectors. Do not strike other users' objections; it is up to the objector to review the changes and strike if they are satisfied.
 * 5) Once the article has five supporting Inquisitor votes and no outstanding objections after at least a week, the article will be added to the queue and be officially known as a "featured article." Although articles do not need regular users' votes to pass, non-Inquisitors are encouraged to review articles and participate in the process.
 * 6) Per Inquisitorius consensus, no Inquisitor may use their Inqvote on their own nominations.

Every day the next article in the queue will be highlighted on the Main Page as featured, marked with the Featured template and removed from the list of nominations. The beginning of the article then appears on the Main Page via the Featured article template. Nominations that are inactive with outstanding objections for a month will be eliminated from the nominations list by the Inquisitorius.

Mohs

 * Nominated by: Yrfeloran 08:02, 19 November 2008 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: Pure Lando Calrissian Trilogy pyramid-power crack. Check your laws of physics at the door - you're in for a wild, wild ride.

(3 Inqs/3 Users/6 Total)
Support
 * 1) Had no trouble with this when it was up for GA. Cull Tremayne 09:52, 19 November 2008 (UTC)
 * 2) Just read this book for the first time.  Chack Jadson  (Talk)  13:58, 3 January 2009 (UTC)
 * 3) Me too. Thefourdotelipsis 13:16, 17 January 2009 (UTC)
 * 4) No picture, but still I support! Enochf 23:55, 5 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 5) Dark Lord Trayus 01:04, 8 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 6) Looks good. -LtNOWIS 04:40, 19 April 2009 (UTC)

Object Comments
 * 1) The last section of the biography, and its corresponding part in the intro, stray really far from the subject. The focus should stay on Mohs, with the Lando/Vuffi plot only in there for context on his story. Related to that, it also seems to be written in Vuffi's and Lando's perpective; you have comments like "revealed to be a Sharu", and the part where Lando returns to the ship to find what Mohs has become. It should be kept in the perspective of Mohs, so you talk about him changing into the other form and waiting for Lando in the Falcon. - Lord Hydronium 03:26, 20 December 2008 (UTC)
 * 2) I think I've addressed this. Yrfeloran 07:56, 17 January 2009 (UTC)
 * 3) In addition to Hydro's objection, the part where the perspective leapt out to me the most was when Mohs and Vaa "vanished" from Calrissian's sight. So, per Hydro. Thefourdotelipsis 09:19, 5 January 2009 (UTC)
 * 4) Specific objection addressed. Yrfeloran 07:56, 17 January 2009 (UTC)
 * 5) From Xwing328:
 * 6) *Around the "Within the great pyramid" section: The previous sentence says they were transported into the pyramid. The next sentence says Mohs falls through the wall, and then Lando arrives. Could this method of transportation be clarified? Are they just falling through a wall or being beamed in?
 * 7) **I've misplaced my copy, so I really can't say. The whole series of events is a little obscure, IIRC. Yrfeloran 03:53, 21 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 8) *Possibly a link to Mohs' mother.
 * 9) *You say the Falcon fled the system. This could use a touch of context, imo, but not too much to make the article focus more on Lando than Mohs. Were they running from something in particular, was the world being destroyed in its transformation, what? —Xwing328 (Talk) 01:54, 18 January 2009 (UTC)
 * 10) Toprawa:
 * 11) *A preliminary objection: I'm not a big fan of alternating between calling him a Sharu and a Toka between the infobox and the first sentence of the introduction, despite the pipelink. It's just confusing, and I would request choosing one or the other for uniformity.Toprawa and Ralltiir 18:26, 19 January 2009 (UTC)
 * 12) **Eh, okay. How's this? Yrfeloran 04:38, 14 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 13) ***No change has been made, if that's what you're referring to. Toprawa and Ralltiir 08:04, 14 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 14) ****Hmm...an edit must have been dropped. I've fixed this now.Yrfeloran 03:53, 21 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 15) Cav's mohs-ings:
 * 16) *I think some explanation about the relationship between the Sharu and Toka peoples, and the fact that they were one and the same needs to be made explicitly clear in the intro.
 * 17) **I've done some tweaking. Yrfeloran 03:53, 21 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 18) *Context for Rokar Gepta and Fabled Key needed in intro, and in the bio.
 * 19) **I've added some context Yrfeloran 03:53, 21 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 20) ***Still need context for Gepta. - Cavalier One FarStar Logo.jpg( Squadron channel ) 12:17, 6 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 21) *Explanation of the Sharu-Toka connection may needed in the first paragraph, in my opinion; its confusing to introduce him as a High Singer of the Sharu, and then call him a Toka in the next sentence. Consistency is needed; refering to him as a Toka up until the point he discovers that he is a Sharu - with the required explanation therein - may work as well.
 * 22) *Why are the Sharu species presumed extinct?
 * 23) * When another altercation distracted Calrissian - Another altercation? When was the first, and is it important?
 * 24) **Tweaked this.
 * 25) *Why had the police detachment been sent to capture Calrissian?
 * 26) * Some context on the Great Lock would be appreciated, and how it is used to gain entrance to the pyramid. I presume the Fabled Key is used, but you haven't stated as such.
 * 27) *You mention that Vuffi Raa betrayed Lando in the intro, but you have no mention of it in the bio.
 * 28) **That's because another objector asked me to take it out...Yrfeloran 03:53, 21 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 29) ***A brief mention in the bio would probably be acceptable, but not to the lengths that you had it originally. Either that, or take out the mention in the intro. There should be no info in the intro that isn't in the bio. - Cavalier One FarStar Logo.jpg( Squadron channel ) 12:17, 6 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 30) * You mention an ancient computer system - more information on this is needed, as it triggers a significant event. Also, since it - according to the PT - is responsible for directing Mohs somewhat, it needs to be introduced and explained far earlier in the bio, possibly at the beginning.
 * 31) **This is stuff that is really not adequately explained in the book. A lot of crazy stuff happens with no explanation at all except for the presumption that the Sharu did it. Yrfeloran 03:53, 21 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 32) *The relationship between the Toka intelligence and the life-orchards should be addressed in the bio as well. - Cavalier One FarStar Logo.jpg( Squadron channel ) 14:50, 24 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 33) **Still some stuff to be worked on. - Cavalier One FarStar Logo.jpg( Squadron channel ) 12:17, 6 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 34) A few more images should be added. One of Lando and/or Vuffi Ra, and one of Geptu come to mind. --Eyrezer 12:03, 6 April 2009 (UTC)
 * There's got to be some sort of award for "most consistently traitorous sidekick". Yrfeloran 08:02, 19 November 2008 (UTC)

Lando Calrissian

 * Nominated by: Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 20:35, 22 November 2008 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: From the two directors that brought you Tales of the Jedi and Wraith Squadron! From the project behind Jaina Solo! From the minds behind Mara Jade Skywalker, an action-packed adventure filled with suspense, betrayal, romance, and, of course, inimitable charm. Now playing: The smoothest FAN ever to grace this page, Lando Calrissian!

(2 Inqs/3 Users/5 Total)
Support
 * 1) As co-nominator. Greyman ( Talk ) 20:45, 23 November 2008 (UTC)
 * 2) Objections will be fixed soon as sources are checked by several users, including myself.  Chack Jadson  (Talk)  01:29, 22 December 2008 (UTC)
 * 3) Imperialles 23:56, 24 January 2009 (UTC)
 * 4) This article is supported by Mecenarylord on 23:12, 4 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 5) CC7567  [ http://images1.wikia.nocookie.net/starwars/images/thumb/5/5f/Rex.png/20px-Rex.png] talk 00:30, 15 March 2009 (UTC)

I dare object to Lando --Eyrezer 04:41, 22 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 1) No info whatsoever from Lando Calrissian: Idiot's Array and Crisis on Cloud City. Not smooth. Thefourdotelipsis 03:04, 23 November 2008 (UTC)
 * 2) *The latter has been addressed; I've asked Borsk about the former. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 21:26, 23 November 2008 (UTC)
 * 3) **Former is also addressed now. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 20:12, 24 November 2008 (UTC)
 * 4) Ditto Galaxy Guide 2: Yavin and Bespin. - Lord Hydronium 03:10, 23 November 2008 (UTC)
 * 5) *I've went ahead and added a sentence or two of some background information for this objection. I looked over my copy of the source again and couldn't see anything new beyond the sentences I just added. Is there something specific you're thinking of that I could work in? Greyman ( Talk ) 13:51, 24 November 2008 (UTC)
 * 6) ** There's some other bits on pages 50, 76, and 88. - Lord Hydronium 08:27, 3 December 2008 (UTC)
 * 7) ***Information added. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 17:11, 4 December 2008 (UTC)
 * 8) * The mentions of Ymile are rather confusingly arranged. There's a picture of her near where Lando wins the bet with Raynor, but no reference to her in the text, then much later in the article it mentions she helped Lando win. That second part should be noted and clarified at the time it actually occurs; also, she should be linked there, since she isn't at the moment. - Lord Hydronium 00:39, 4 December 2008 (UTC)
 * 9) * Succession box should include Treece; Action Tidings and the Cloud City Databank entry both say he was the Administrator of Cloud City. - Lord Hydronium 00:41, 4 December 2008 (UTC)
 * 10) **Fixed the Ymile bits and buffed Lady Luck overall. Also, adjusted succession box, reffed from the actual Marvel comics though. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 01:15, 4 December 2008 (UTC)
 * 11) * Information missing on how Lando got back Cloud City, from The New Essential Guide to Characters. Geonosis and the Outer Rim Worlds not in; amongst the things to add is a bit in there about how Lando raised Tibanna profits that's also in the NEC. - Lord Hydronium 07:29, 4 December 2008 (UTC)
 * 12) **The Tibanna profits bit is already in there, just referenced from another source. The Cloud City re-taking has been added. Still working on GATOW. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 17:11, 4 December 2008 (UTC)
 * 13) ***Two tidbits from GATORW added. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 16:41, 11 December 2008 (UTC)
 * 14) ****Added it to the "Sources" list as well. - Lord Hydronium 23:23, 12 December 2008 (UTC)
 * 15) ***Oh, I see; I was searching for "percent". - Lord Hydronium 19:52, 4 December 2008 (UTC)
 * 16) * More NEGTC tidbits: Lando giving control of Cloud City to the Ugnaughts after Zorba cedes it. Lando refusing to go to Chewbacca's funeral out of guilt. From GG3: Lobot convinced Lando to help Leia and the group. - Lord Hydronium 07:45, 4 December 2008 (UTC)
 * 17) **All of the above fixed. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 17:11, 4 December 2008 (UTC)
 * 18) *More missing sources: Rebellion Era Sourcebook, Roleplaying Game Revised Core Rulebook, Roleplaying Game: Saga Edition Core Rulebook , Dark Empire Sourcebook, The Truce at Bakura Sourcebook, Han Solo and the Corporate Sector Sourcebook (I just spotted a small mention, but there could be more) , Heir to the Empire Sourcebook, The Last Command Sourcebook, and Star Wars Trilogy Sourcebook - Special Edition . For now. - Lord Hydronium 23:23, 12 December 2008 (UTC)
 * 19) ** Rebellion Era Sourcebook is listed now, but it needs information from it. There's some on Page 111, for a start. - Lord Hydronium 07:01, 10 January 2009 (UTC)
 * 20) ***The info on that page was already in the article. Could you tell me what specifically you are referring to? And the rest of the sourcebooks have been checked and added.  Chack Jadson  (Talk) 19:18, 11 January 2009 (UTC)
 * 21) *I had a whole thing for here before, a giant list of every piece of information I could find from these sources that was missing. Then my text editor crashed, so here's a much more general list. The Cloud City section from the RESB has information on Lando's neutrality. The RCR talks about him getting his fortunes and smuggling arms to the Rebellion. DESB needs a ton of information from it. Read the whole thing. Lando's section, Wedge's section, an inset in the Coruscant section, and the Star Destroyer section have major information missing from the article—everything up to Lando crashing on Coruscant is missing. The sourcebooks for HTTE and Dark Force Rising have important information in their Lando sections, as well as the Nkllon section of the former and Lady Luck section of the latter. Dark Force Rising overall needs major expansion. It barely touches on their capture by Garm, the entire search for the fleet, and the battle for the Katana. The first paragraph if the SOTE section is extremely vague and needs expanding; nothing is said about how Rendar is guiding them or how he abandons them, or where the Imperial forces come from. My recommendation would be to withdraw the nom for now. It's missing too much major information from too many major sources. Dark Empire Sourcebook alone is a huge chunk not included, and with all that's been found, I frankly don't trust that this article is near complete. My advice would be to remove it, to read or reread all the sources thoroughly, rework the article, and then renom it when it's in a more complete state. - Lord Hydronium 03:29, 10 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 22) **Major buffs to SOTE and DFR completed. Will go through the other TTT-related sourcebooks soon. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 17:54, 18 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 23) ***Major buffs to HTTE Sourcebook completed, minor buff to Rebellion Era Sourcebook. If you want more information from that source, I'll need a page number, because I just read through the entire thing and found a whopping one sentence of minor information. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 16:11, 30 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 24) ****RESB's good. - Lord Hydronium 23:20, 30 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 25) *****Buffed RCRGR, working on the DFR, TLC sourcebooks. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 16:13, 13 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 26) ******TLC sourcebook buffed. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 00:45, 20 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 27) * for The Truce at Bakura, but it contains unique information to add. - Lord Hydronium 23:28, 12 December 2008 (UTC)
 * 28) **Fixed. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 19:44, 26 December 2008 (UTC)
 * 29) *In addition to the above, the following appearances and mentions are missing: Out of the Closet: The Assassin's Tale, Darksaber, Force Heretic I: Remnant, Therefore I Am: The Tale of IG-88, Payback: The Tale of Dengar, The Last One Standing: The Tale of Boba Fett, X-wing: Rogue Squadron, X-wing: Wedge's Gamble, X-wing: Wraith Squadron, Young Jedi Knights: Heirs of the Force, Young Jedi Knights: The Lost Ones, Young Jedi Knights: Lightsabers, Young Jedi Knights: Darkest Knight, Young Jedi Knights: Shards of Alderaan, Young Jedi Knights: Jedi Bounty, and Young Jedi Knights: The Emperor's Plague. - Lord Hydronium 01:17, 13 December 2008 (UTC)
 * 30) **Chack and I have addressed these. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 19:44, 26 December 2008 (UTC)
 * 31) ***Force Heretic I has a bit about Lando from Jaina's childhood. Find text-searchable versions of these (ask on IRC if you need a source) and search through them for "Lando" or "Calrissian", please, because if the article's missing information from one, there's a chance it's missing from the others. - Lord Hydronium 03:29, 10 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 32) ****No, no. You see, I did find that information when I went through and used text-searchable versions of these the first time. I just decided that particular tidbit was too anecdotal for inclusion in an encyclopedia article. However, if you're set on seeing "Calrissian also taught Jaina Solo to enjoy altha protein drinks during her childhood" in the article, I will add it, despite how trivial it seems. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 16:17, 12 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 33) *****By itself that tidbit might be too anecdotal, but I think the fact that Lando had more interaction with Jaina in her youth than just going on a mission with her is worth something. - Lord Hydronium 19:08, 12 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 34) ******After our discussion in IRC, I did a little more YJK research and added a paragraph about their interactions in general. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 19:58, 14 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 35) *Almost forgot: None of the movie novelizations or radio dramas are included. - Lord Hydronium 01:19, 13 December 2008 (UTC)
 * 36) **This particular objection has been addressed, along with adding a number of other ESB and ROTJ-related appearances. I've checked both novelizations and will check with Tope to make sure there's no new info in the radio dramas. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 18:19, 1 January 2009 (UTC)
 * 37) **Han will have these objections down! We've gotta give them more time! (In all seriousness, we are working on these). Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 16:40, 13 December 2008 (UTC)
 * 38) * Sorry, haven't checked those yet, but another: Galaxywide NewsNets from Adventure Journal 14. "Calrissian Resurfaces as Baron Administrator". - Lord Hydronium 06:36, 10 January 2009 (UTC)
 * 39) **Mined. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 16:45, 20 January 2009 (UTC)
 * 40) *Wretched Hives of Scum and Villainy, page 13, bottom left. - Lord Hydronium 05:02, 6 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 41) **Tweaked. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 16:13, 13 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 42) *Galaxywide NewsNets in Adventure Journal 5 has another article with Lando info, "Smugglers' Roster: Random Rumors". - Lord Hydronium 01:46, 23 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 43) Gah, redlinks in source list, mine Databank and Wizards. Those first two totally slipped me mind.  Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 03:19, 23 November 2008 (UTC)
 * 44) *Red links busted. Greyman ( Talk ) 16:56, 24 November 2008 (UTC)
 * 45) *Databank has been mined and source list updated. Greyman ( Talk ) 15:32, 25 November 2008 (UTC)
 * 46) Infobox not fully/correctly sourced.  Graestan ( Talk ) 04:24, 23 November 2008 (UTC)
 * 47) *I think I got the missing reference. If you desire other sourcing, please let me know. ;-) Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 20:22, 23 November 2008 (UTC)
 * 48) **Got it on the second try. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 21:26, 23 November 2008 (UTC)
 * 49) I'd like to take Yrf's comment below and turn it into an actual objection; for instance, I know there are quotes to be had by or about Lando and/or what he was up to at the time for the LCA, TTT, and BFC. Ideally, since the sections are so long, each should probably have a quote.  Graestan ( Talk ) 13:48, 23 November 2008 (UTC)
 * 50) *All sections now have quotes except three tiny sections in the "Non-canon appearances" section in the BtS since quotes do not exist for those parts. Greyman ( Talk ) 16:32, 24 November 2008 (UTC)
 * 51) **Hope you found at least one funny one from LCA. ;) Graestan ( Talk ) 23:12, 25 November 2008 (UTC)
 * File:Lando91.jpg, File:LanLukVil.jpg, File:Weaklando.jpg, File:Lando&Luke Marvel71.jpg and File:Lando&Han captive.jpg could all do with a re-scan. Other than that, excellent work, and about time! :) --Imperialles 13:08, 24 December 2008 (UTC)
 * 1) *All done. I was bored and Ataru mentioned it at the right time. -- Darth Culator  (Talk) 00:16, 30 December 2008 (UTC)
 * 2) Image placement is irrelevant to the text in a number of locations. SinisterSamurai 07:32, 5 January 2009 (UTC)
 * 3) *I've moved a few things around. As it stands, there are two images that aren't directly pertinent to the sections they are in: the Caamas Document crisis section, and in the Kessel investment sections, where we used generic Lando images to fill gaps that would have left lots of text with no complimentary images. As it is, there's a good balance of images to compliment the text, but by removing those, the article's appearance would suffer accordingly. And there is article precedent for using generic images to fill "gaps". If there were more relevant images that could be substituted in, just point me in their direction and I'll gladly change it, but for now, it should stay as it is. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 17:03, 5 January 2009 (UTC)
 * 4) **Looks good.
 * 5) Needs info from Star Wars: Power of the Jedi. Thefourdotelipsis 08:54, 5 January 2009 (UTC)
 * 6) *Added.  Chack Jadson  (Talk) 21:55, 8 January 2009 (UTC)
 * 7) Eyrezer
 * 8) * The Young Calrissian comic is listed in the Non-canon section of the appearances, but is in the main body without any special tags. It should be consistent one way or the other. If, as it looks like, the story is mentioned in the CSWE, then I suggest it gets moved out of the non-canon section of the appearances. I also suggest that the reference to YC have a note added along the lines of: "This story was canonized by inclusion in the Complete Star Wars Encyclopedia." His ship from this story could also get a mention in the Ships section later on. --Eyrezer 11:00, 5 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 9) **It doesn't seem to be mentioned in CSWE, according to Chack. I've added in non-canon tags in the main body, will get to the ships section soon. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 01:50, 9 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 10) ***Correction. Our page seems to list the comic as canon, so I'll check and see if I can find where it was canonized. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 01:53, 9 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 11) ****Purpilia added CSWE as a source on the Meek page, which is what I was going by. Probably not mentioned in Lando's article itself, though. --Eyrezer 09:24, 9 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 12) *****Yeah, I've fixed just about all the objection, need to add the ships section, though. ships section added. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 16:28, 9 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 13) ******Great. With the Meek story, doesn't the CSWE say it was reported by HNN sources? This should be added, in a way that reflects the potential ambiguity or unreliability of the account that seems to be suggested in the Encyclopedia entry. --Eyrezer 14:03, 10 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 14) *******That's exactly what CSWE reports. I've updated the article to reflect that. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 18:36, 10 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 15) * Osuno Whett is reintroduced too abruptly in the ThonBaka section. It needs to be explained how/why he was there.
 * 16) **Fixed. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 20:24, 27 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 17) * Did Bria change her mind? I thought it might have always been her plan to rip off the smugglers.
 * 18) **Rebel Dawn and our Tharen article are ambiguous at best. I've ambiguified it also in the Lando article correspondingly. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 21:12, 2 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 19) * "Shortly thereafter, Calrissian found himself on another treasure hunt sponsored by a trio of Hutts eagerly hunting the fabled Yavin Vassilika, a priceless, gemlike statuette, having been saved by Bib Fortuna after losing a game of sabacc." This makes it sound as though the Vassilika was saved by Fortuna.
 * 20) **Reworded. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 20:24, 27 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 21) * Are you certain about the placement of the Ruins of Dantooine stuff? It would make so much more sense if it didn't interrupt his trip to Bespin...
 * 22) **Well, the Galaxy of Fear stuff happened in 7 months ABY, and Lando doesn't win Cloud City until after 2 ABY, according to AJ 14, which is set circa 2 ABY according to my sources. That's why the Ruins of Dantooine stuff is there&mdash;it's before he wins Cloud City and after the Galaxy of Fear stuff, as Ruins of Dantooine is set 1.5 ABY. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 21:12, 2 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 23) ***A shame, but that seems right. --Eyrezer 23:48, 5 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 24) * An appropriate mention of Tocneppil and Dash somewhere in the early sections should be added, based on that quote at the start of "Revenge attempts." Also a mention of Moabab would be good.
 * 25) **I'm not a big fan of saying "Calrissian met X" ten paragraphs before they actually have significant encounters with him, but I recognize that that opinion is not universally held. I've mentioned Tocneppil, Dash, and Mungo Baobab farther up, in a general sort of way since the timeline is unknown. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 00:09, 6 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 26) ***Yeah, I can understand that. I mainly requested it because Tocneppil was not otherwise mentioned in the bio.
 * 27) * Can you explain why EV-9D9 was a suspect at that early point? Do we know that the Idiot's Array story is not after EV's attempt?
 * 28) **I have no explanation, so I've moved EV-9D9's story to before Idiot's Array. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 17:54, 18 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 29) ***Great. I hoped that might be possible, but I wasn't sure. --Eyrezer 22:51, 18 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 30) * "Furthermore, he stated that he intended to keep things running smoothly at Calrissian, using a modus operandi he described as the Lando System." Is this meant to be running smoothly at Bespin?
 * 31) **Reworded. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 20:24, 27 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 32) * The Fact Files sources list needs to be expanded, and the reference notes likewise made more specific. (per this CT).
 * 33) **Cav has promised me FF goodness, will update as soon as I have my hands on them. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 20:24, 27 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 34) ***Fact Files are now in the source list, and the references have been updated accordingly. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 21:12, 2 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 35) * I suspect that "the death of scientist Lem on Cloud City" is the same as "when a noted scientist, Doctor Issan Len was murdered." These should be combined.
 * 36) **I was hoping someone would say that. It only appears as Lem in the Fact File, but I left in just because one could look at it through a hyperinclusionist point of view and say that they're different incidents. Removed. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 00:09, 6 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 37) ***I added a redirect
 * 38) *The image of Boba Fett in the Precursor section is out of place. Is there no appropriate image from Crisis on Cloud City?
 * 39) **Working on it, but the images from Crisis are junk in quality. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 17:54, 18 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 40) * "Just as they rocketed off the station," in the Destruction fo the Tarkin section. Were they in space suits or another ship? Could you clarify?
 * 41) **Clarified, with thanks to QuiGonJinn for the info. ;-) Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 16:07, 9 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 42) * A few of the WEG sources actually link to a disambig for first and second editions. Could you link to the actual ones, and add in the second editions, etc... unless we have policy otherwise.
 * 43) **I checked them, added in second editions for the two Galaxy Guides. I checked the others, but didn't see anything else at a first glance. Did you have other corrections in mind? Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 16:02, 9 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 44) * I'm fairly certain Lando will be in a number of video game guidebooks. (On a quick look at the source list, I couldn't see any.) These likely include the guides from Demolition, Jedi Outcast, and others...
 * 45) **I've taken care of this one myself.
 * 46) ***I've also tweaked the article with some small tidbits of information. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 15:56, 23 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 47) ****Great. --Eyrezer 23:03, 30 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 48) *Lando is in Star Wars: Rebellion (video game), and so also likely Rebellion: Prima's Official Strategy Guide. The game needs to be checked. --Eyrezer 08:27, 22 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 49) * The Return to Cloud City section: "Spotting a chance to divert Lobot's attention from himself to the Imperials..." I don;t understand how this is meant to work. How will attacking the trooper's divert Lobot's attention? Secondly, there is only one short paragraph on Star Wars 83: Sweetheart Contract. This should be expanded to the level of detail of the other Marvel comics. --Eyrezer 11:10, 24 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 50) **Fixed. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 21:31, 20 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 51) * In the first paragraph of the Black Sun section, it would be good just to add a little half-line regarding Luke. The previous section ends with him left behind, and I know that he has some other adventures/complications. While they don't need to be described, it should mention that Luke has rejoined the Rebels or something.
 * 52) **Sure. Done. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 15:33, 30 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 53) * Can you explain why Benedict Vidkun attacked them?
 * 54) **Fixed. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 15:33, 30 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 55) *I added this pic, but you may prefer this one instead. --Eyrezer 10:57, 30 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 56) * In the Star Wars Technical Journal (Volume One), page 17, it is mentioned that Lando added the quad lasers to the MF. I haven't read down to the ships section yet, but this should be added if not already. --Eyrezer 11:46, 31 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 57) **Adjusted. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 00:45, 20 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 58) *Finding Argo and Vanis: context on who Mone is. How was Calrissian and co able to buy it from the Imps without them realizing they were rebels? Wasn't it because Lando disguised himself as Drebble?
 * 59) *In the same section, "There, Calrissian learned that Solo had been delivered to Jabba Desilijic Tiure while undercover on Arcan IV, posing as Drebble." It is not clear who was undercover. Also, the mention of Arcan IV in this sentence is probably unnecessary. You also need to mention how/why Lando already had The Minstrel in his possession.
 * 60) *Which member of the gang tried to steal the statue? A number of the members have articles here, and so a link should be added to the appropriate one, or a redlink given.
 * 61) *"They then helped Organa board the Falcon and returned to rendezvous with Alliance forces." A bit more info here, please. (Mission to Yinchorr section)
 * 62) *You mention Calrissian is fluent in 18 languages. As far as possible, I think these should actually be specified in the Talents and abilities section. From earlier in the bio, we know that one is a Baragwinian trade dialect. Add this there too.
 * 63) *There needs to be a better conclusion to the Demolition paragraph: "But even that was not enough to impress Jabba and to be placed in the Hutt's palace as a guard". What happened in the competition? Did he win? Presumably we don't know exactly, but we must know something. A mention of other opponents could also be appropriate.
 * 64) **Tweaked, a bit. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 20:32, 29 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 65) *"He was reluctant to abandon Leia to Jabba's mercy, but assured him she would be fine with a quick whisper." There is obviously a word missing here. I was going to add in a "she" but it seems from the next sentence that Leia didn't know it was Lando so it cannot have been her that was reassuring him...
 * 1) **This objection was a pain, but after re-checking the radio drama and the novel, there appears to be a bit of a canon conflict. I've adjusted the text and tossed in a ref explaining everything. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 20:32, 29 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 2) Toprawa:
 * 3) *I realize I promised you the ESB RD script notes, but until that time, here's the objection for their missing info.
 * 4) *Also, you're missing info from the ROTJ radio drama/script.
 * 5) **Can you be a little more specific about which parts? I gave it a listen when Hydro made his initial ESB objection, and while I don't have the script, I did add info from the radio drama. Was there something in particular you were looking for? Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 22:32, 19 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 6) ***Sure. I'm in the process of listening to it now for my article purposes, so I might add to this, but two things that strike me as pertinent are the scene in which he first approaches Leia in Jabba's palace to reveal himself, meaning that not everyone in the Save Han group knew how he had gotten in and where he was; and secondly the scene in which they first leave Tatooine, they're forced escape past an Imperial blockade. Lando just sits in the Falcon ' s cockpit and doesn't do anything but talk, but a mention would be appropriate, I feel. Toprawa and Ralltiir 22:35, 19 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 7) ***While en route to the Rebel fleet from Tatooine, Lando and the group help sooth Threepio's hurt feelings about not being privy to the specifics of the rescue Han plan. They talk about Corellian Overdrive, and Lando goes on to fix Threepio's damaged photoreceptor. Toprawa and Ralltiir 22:46, 19 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 8) ***There's actually a lot more to that scene. Han and Lando talk about how the Falcon was in Lando's possession during Han's carbonite days, etc. Toprawa and Ralltiir 23:07, 19 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 9) ****ROTJ radio drama has been located, listened to, and the article updated appropriately. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 17:54, 18 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 10) *Including "TCG: Return of the Jedi" and "The Empire Strikes Back (TCG)" in the Source list just isn't good enough, I'm afraid. Moreover, I see only a single CCG card in that entire Source list, which tells me you haven't really scoured these cards for new information. You'd be surprised to find some new tidbits here and there. I realize there are probably dozens upon dozens of cards with Lando info on them, but if you're going to include one, you need to include them all. Yes, I know it sucks, and it's hard work, but this is an FA. Toprawa and Ralltiir 22:20, 19 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 11) **"if you're going to include one, you need to include them all." Does this mean I just get away with removing that one? :-P ^_^ (lol, jk). No, in all seriousness, you're absolutely right. I've done all the CCG cards, and I'll let you know when I get the radio stuff and TCG ones added in. I'm going to be kind of busy until the end of the week due to RL though. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 20:40, 24 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 12) ***5 and a half dozen TCG and CCG cards added to source list? Is that better? Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 18:01, 26 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 13) QuiGon
 * 14) * No info from The Gambler's Quest.
 * 15) **I've added a short paragraph myself based on what was written in the plot summary for this comic. I think it's sufficient. QuiGonJinn There's always a bigger fish. 15:57, 30 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 16) * Some things are missing in the appearances list. Mighty Chronicles adaptations, Star Wars The Empire Strikes Back Mobile, Super Star Wars series, etc. QuiGonJinn Be mindful of the Living Force...Quigonheadshot.jpg 17:54, 25 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 17) **Took care of it myself per Ataru's request. QuiGonJinn There's always a bigger fish. 16:43, 8 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 18) * More missing info from N.R.I. Reports. Small tidbits about Lando requesting aid from the Senate. QuiGonJinn There's always a bigger fish. 19:30, 12 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 19) **Added. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 19:58, 14 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 20) * Are you sure that the "Black Sun coup" section should go between the Marvel stories? It would make much more sense to place it after the Nagai-Tof war. All Marvel stories are linked to each other pretty tight and there is no gap in the plot for SotE: Evolution to take place. QuiGonJinn There's always a bigger fish. 20:53, 14 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 21) **After some research, I've seen no reason to leave the layout as is, and the Black Sun coup is now placed after the Marvel sections. Seems to make more sense that way. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 15:56, 23 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 22) * "The Mindharp of Sharu" section. Context on Jabba.
 * 23) * Also, context needed on Darth Vader and Luke upon first mentions in the "Trap at Cloud City"" section.
 * 24) * Explain what was so important in Luke that Vader set a trap for him.
 * 25) * Same section."Especially after the disappearance of C-3PO" Provide some context on what really happened to him. Then mention somewhere in this section that 3PO was recovered, because as it is now, it left me under the impression that the droid was still missing when Lando and the others left Bespin.
 * 26) * Same section again. "in pursuit of the Millennium Falcon and its Rebel crew". Mention that it was Han who has joined the Rebels, because it can be interpreted as if some unknown Rebels have acquired the ship.
 * 27) * Mention that Lando flirted with Leia and/or add it to the relationships.
 * 28) **All of QuiGon's objections up through this have been fixed. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 01:08, 6 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 29) * The "Skywalker's affliction" section. Context on Domina Tagge.
 * 30) * Same section. "which Darth Vader had falsely accused Luke of being responsible for". Rephrase. Yes, Vader did falsely accuse Luke the first time, but then Skywalker killed Tagge for real in issue 37, even if he did it by accident.
 * 31) * "Finding Argo and Vanis" section. Last sentence: "but were apparently unable to find anything." Unsourced.
 * 32) * Same section. Context on the second Death Star.
 * 33) * Linking problems. Jabba is linked in both "The Mindharp of Sharu" and "Mission to Blimph 3" sections, while the second Death Star is not linked at all upon the first mention in "Finding Argo and Vanis", but is instead linked in "The Battle of Endor"; and the link is that of the Death Star in general instead of Death Star II. Check other links.
 * 34) * "Near-death experience on Godo". Context on Bey.
 * 35) * Mention that Lumiya changed sides and allied herself with Tofs. And that she was shot on Saijo.
 * 36) **All of these should be fixed. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 21:31, 20 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 37) * Stay tuned. QuiGonJinn There's always a bigger fish. 21:01, 30 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 38) * "Nomad City". Context on Ecclessis Figg, ysalamiri. Also, why Thrawn needed the ysalamiri?
 * 39) * "Karrde hid the two former generals" Next sentence:"As such, the two former generals". Repetitive, rephrase.
 * 40) * "Karrde knew that was where Skywalker, who had escaped from his custody, and his pursuer, a woman named Mara Jade, would flee to, and that the Empire would find them and realize that Karrde had not turned over Skywalker to them." Maybe it's just me, but this sentence seems weird.
 * 41) **I've finally understood what this sentence says and I think I had some difficulty with it because of the missing "that". I've added it myself.
 * 42) * "After trekking through kilometers of forest, fending off predators, the party received when some Noghri commandos". Received what?
 * 43) **Everything from "Nomad City" down to here has been fixed. Although, Figg was already contextified. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 01:08, 6 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 44) ***I'm sorry, but I haven't seen any context. You didn't say who Figg was. I've added it myself, just to show you what I wanted in the first place. QuiGonJinn There's always a bigger fish. 11:45, 6 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 45) ****I figured that saying that Figg was the one who first built Cloud City was sufficient context, but I have no problems with your change. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 15:56, 6 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 46) *"Palpatine reborn": "Unbeknownst to Calrissian, Skywalker had fallen to the dark side of the Force, and was in fact commanding the Imperial fleet". Mention that prior to that, he gave the codes to Artoo.
 * 47) *Same section. Mention that Skywalker was redeemed after all.
 * 48) * "Run-in with the Imperial Remnant" Context on Reelo Baruk.
 * 49) * After the events of Jedi Outcast that happened in 12 ABY you mention the events of Planet of Twilight as happening the same year, yet the latter is placed here on Wook in 13 ABY. I don't know if it is really a mistake, because I haven't read the book.
 * 50) * "Tag and Bink". Context on Tag.
 * 51) **Last three fixed. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 15:52, 6 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 52) *I guess that's all. QuiGonJinn There's always a bigger fish. 11:57, 31 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 53) * One more thing. Is there nothing to add from Ord Vaxal: Prison Planet of the Empire? QuiGonJinn There's always a bigger fish. 14:19, 8 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 54) **According to Jaymach via IRC, he's only pictured in it. I've tagged the source appropriately. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 20:32, 29 April 2009 (UTC)

Comments
 * Not a formal objection, but there's space for a lot more quotes in the article. Yrfeloran 04:13, 23 November 2008 (UTC)
 * Who portrayed Lando in Dark Forces: Soldier for the Empire audio drama? Mauser 13:48, 1 February 2009 (UTC)
 * I'm voting for it!!!!!!!!
 * Will give a full Outcast update as soon as I can. I'll busy through the weekend and Monday, though, but next week, I hope to get that and some more of the sourcebooks done. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 20:06, 26 March 2009 (UTC)

Brianna

 * Nominated by: 01:42, 28 January 2009 (UTC)


 * Nomination comments: As recommended, trying for FA after GA success.

(1 Inqs/1 Users/2 Total)
Support
 * 06:52, 31 January 2009 (UTC)
 * 1) Thefourdotelipsis 22:48, 21 April 2009 (UTC)

Oppose
 * 1) Preliminaries for that promised review:
 * 2) * A fair lot of the sections need to be further divided up. "Playing as a male Exile" in particular is one of the most exhaustively long sections I've ever seen.
 * 3) **Hopefully accomplished.
 * 4) ***"Early life" and "Travels with the Exile" should probably have subsections. Graestan ( Talk ) 15:58, 11 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 5) **Done.
 * 6) * "Travels with the Exile" deserves a quote, preferably something about the Exile from Brianna's own dialog.
 * 7) **Done.
 * 8) * The "Masters" field of the infobox could be filled out a little more expansively and creatively.
 * 9) **Done
 * 10) ***Remember to list chronologically. Graestan ( Talk ) 15:58, 11 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 11) * File:Lasthandmaiden.jpg is a pretty terrible image and could use a recapture.
 * 12) * Another image could probably be snagged to be fit into the BtS section; while something appropriate to the subject matter is preferable, general Brianna pictures shouldn't be any trouble, either.
 * 13) * Linking really needs to be gone over. Have pipelinking in mind (the missions, for example). Also, in particular I noticed some glaring omissions in the links for the BtS.
 * 14) **I believe this has been handled.
 * 15) * Graestan ( Talk ) 05:14, 5 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 16) Graestan the Merciless:
 * 17) * Please check the Complete Star Wars Encyclopedia for information.
 * 18) **According to Doluk, who has the CSWE, this is the entirety of Brianna's article, and the info has already been incorporated in the article: "An Echani Handmaiden who served the Jedi Knight Atris almost 4,000 years before the Battle of Yavin. She was the daughter of politician Yusanis and Jedi Master Arren Kae, veterans of the Mandalorian Wars. Brianna was born with evidence of her parents' infidelity and bore the stigma of this indiscretion. Brianna stole the freighter Ebon Hawk from Telos IV."
 * 19) ***At least put it in the source list. Why not source something to it, also, for good measure? Graestan ( Talk ) 03:03, 21 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 20) ***Done.
 * 21) * Please arrange the source list by publication date.
 * 22) **Check.
 * 23) * Reference tags number three and six appear to be identical. Please merge them.
 * 24) **Check.
 * 25) * "Brianna was the daughter of a forbidden love affair" – Agreement issues. Please rephrase. Also, "affair" is used a bit repetitively.
 * 26) **Check.
 * 27) * Please explain Kae's exile. How? From what?
 * 28) **Check.
 * 29) * The tense gets all wonky after this. Lose all the "woulds" and get back to normal, narrative past tense.
 * 30) **Check.
 * 31) * Mandalorian Wars needs context.
 * 32) **Done.
 * 33) * "the responsibilities of his other five daughters and Brianna" – Somewhat vague. Please be more explicit.
 * 34) **Done.
 * 35) * "The two" sounds odd after you speak of three people in the previous sentence.
 * 36) **Done.
 * 37) * The Echani probably need some context. When you speak of Revan destabilizing them, it sounds odd, as they are presented simply, as if only a species, before this.
 * 38) **Done.
 * 39) * Revan needs to be set up as the DLotS before referring to him offhand as such.
 * 40) **Done.
 * 41) * "brought under service to" – Please clean up the syntax.
 * 42) **Done.
 * 43) ***I fixed the new "were entered the service of." Graestan ( Talk ) 03:03, 21 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 44) * "Masters of the Jedi Civil War" – This is somewhat confusing. Please be more specific.
 * 45) **Done.
 * 46) * Mentioning Brianna's ignorance of her own Force sensitivity during her time with Atris would be helpful.
 * 47) **Done.
 * 48) * Okay, was Yusanis married when he had the fling with Kae? You don't mention it, but go on to talk about his infidelity later.
 * 49) **Check.
 * 50) * I'm going to stop right here. I haven't even looked at the intro. Please take everything I've said here, and go back through the article vigorously, applying all the sorts of things I've pointed out. I'll resume the review once the previous objections have been rectified. Graestan ( Talk ) 04:18, 13 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 51) Graestan's Unlimited Mercilessness: I wasn't kidding about the statement in the last round. I tried to keep going through, and came up with like five context and other content-related objections in a couple of sentences. Please, please go through the rest of the article; the types of things I'm going to object to are the ones I already have.  Graestan ( Talk ) 03:15, 21 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 52) Cylka:
 * 53) * More context is needed regarding her parents Yusanis and Arren Kae. Avoid mentioning Kreia this early because it will be somewhat difficult to give her context at this point.
 * 54) * More context is needed on Atris when she is introduced. Who was she, why was she there, and so on.
 * 55) * Same for the Telosian Jedi Academy when it is first introduced. You need to add in why it was built, what was stored there, etc.
 * 56) * More context on the destruction of Peragus and how the Exile and the Ebon Hawk were involved. Also explain why the ship was impounded and the companions detained by TSF.
 * 57) * More context on who the Exile when she is first introduced.
 * 58) * A bit of context as to how they tracked the Hawk to the hidden Academy and make sure to mention all of the companions.
 * 59) * The Exile agreed to Kreia's request so as to avoid a conflict - this needs more context. It is a bit arbitrary as it stands now. Cylka  -talk- 23:26, 7 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 60) **Have dealt with the objections up to here so far.
 * 61) * Brianna and the Exile have a long conversation with each other in the Academy. This should be explained in greater detail.
 * 62) **Addressed.
 * 63) * More context is needed on the mission to find the Jedi Masters. Why were they on that mission in the first place and why was it important.
 * 64) **Also addressed.
 * 65) * A bit more information is needed on Atris's fall to the dark side.
 * 66) **Done.
 * 67) * Some more context is needed to the final battle at Malachor V. Cylka  -talk- 10:20, 9 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 68) **Also done.
 * 69) * The paragraphs in the P&A are a bit short. Either try flesh them out a bit, or maybe combine them.
 * 70) **Done.
 * 71) * In the first part of the Bts, the paragraphs are too short. Combining them would probably be a good idea.
 * 72) **Done.
 * 73) * The playing as a male exile section is too long and much of the information is redundant. Instead of repeating the same information that is in the body, maybe just a paragraph or two explaining the differences will suffice. A lot of the information in this section can be integrated into the main body since we know that Brianna traveling with the Exile is canon. It seems to me that only the romance needs to stay in the Bts.
 * 74) **Addressed.
 * 75) * The romance with a male Exile needs to be expanded a bit more. You should include her jealous interactions with Visas Marr.
 * 76) **Done.
 * 77) * Brianna also had a Handmaiden's staff. You should try to fit that in somewhere.
 * 78) **Done.
 * 79) *The article is well on it's way. It just has a bit too little information in some areas, and a bit too much redundancy in others. But it's looking good! Cylka  -talk- 20:08, 6 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 80) Four Dot:
 * 81) * "Brianna eventually received Jedi training from the Exile and become known as one of the Lost Jedi, resulting in a forced fight between Brianna, her sisters and former master." - Forced fight? This is confusing. Perhaps this should be elaborated upon in the intro, which would beef it up and allow it to be split into two paragraphs.
 * 82) **I elaborated a bit to make the info a bit more clear, but I don't think it's quite enough for two paragraphs.
 * 83) ***I split it myself, but if you don't like how it looks, feel free to switch it back. And that reads much better now. Thefourdotelipsis 06:57, 18 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 84) ***It looks fine to me, I just wasn't sure if that was what you were looking for.
 * 85) * "The offspring of Echani parents were perceived as being identical in appearance to anyone who was not of the Echani, presumably favoring the physical characteristics of their parent of the same sex. Because of this Brianna looked different from the other handmaidens, taking the genetic characteristics of her Jedi mother." - This seems like a bit of a given to me, and can perhaps be stated more economically.
 * 86) **Ok, hopefully this is a bit better.
 * 87) ***I understand the significance better now. Good. Thefourdotelipsis 02:56, 19 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 88) * There are times where it feels as though you are straying away from Brianna's story to tell the story of The Sith Lords. This is obviously necessary, but it generally feels like you are telling the Exile's story at these points, and Brianna's story is momentarily abandoned. You should probably take a look at these segments and try and tweak them more towards Brianna's perspective. Thefourdotelipsis 03:42, 17 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 89) **I tweaked it a little bit, but since I'm not sure which segments you meant specifically, feel free to point them out if I missed them.
 * 90) ***I think you've fixed the major one. Looking back, the other bits that gave me pause are probably going to have to stay that way. Thefourdotelipsis 22:48, 21 April 2009 (UTC)

Comments
 * Just a suggestion: Surely more images can be found for illustration purposes. Screenshots from the game will suffice. Thefourdotelipsis 03:42, 17 April 2009 (UTC)

Remove nomination (Inquisitorius vote only)
 * 1) I'm calling this one derailed.  Graestan ( Talk ) 22:42, 6 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 2) *I'm back after an admittedly lengthy absence and started working on the article again yesterday. Just letting you know! 22:11, 7 April 2009 (UTC)

Keep nomination
 * 1) At least for the time being. I think it can be salvaged. Fair warning to the nominator, though: I'll be easily swayed if nothing is done. Thefourdotelipsis 06:34, 17 April 2009 (UTC)

Mirta Gev

 * Nominated by:  IFYLOFD  ( Come with me if you want to live. ) 03:00, 18 February 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: None.

(3 Inqs/0 Users/3 Total)
Support
 * 1) You'll need full bacta submersion after this duel. —Tommy  Dark side Master SWGTCG.jpg ( Nine two eight one ) 22:18, 14 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 2) Thefourdotelipsis 03:33, 19 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 3)  Chack Jadson  (Talk)  12:07, 26 April 2009 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) I think you should expand the "Second Battle of Fondor" section. At the moment, it has no mention of her fight with Tahiri Veila during it, or that Jacen Solo Force choked her, so that Tahiri could escape --Jinzler 21:35, 18 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 2) *Addressed.  IFYLOFD  ( Come with me if you want to live. ) 02:30, 25 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 3) DC
 * 4) * I think you should state the actual year of Sinta's carbonation instead of how long ago it was.
 * 5) **Addressed.
 * 6) * Why didn't Marec and Vel's relationship last?
 * 7) **It doesn't say.
 * 8) ***True indeed. —Tommy Dark side Master SWGTCG.jpg ( Nine two eight one ) 22:15, 24 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 9) * The entire Early Life section is very choppy and doesn't flow well at all.
 * 10) **Addressed.
 * 11) ***It looks good now. —Tommy Dark side Master SWGTCG.jpg ( Nine two eight one ) 22:15, 24 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 12) * "Gev got into her mother and grandfather's business as a bounty hunter, at one point encountering former clone trooper Skirata during an ill-fated mission." You're beginning to go somewhere in this sentence, but it needs more detail, mostly about her encounter with Skirata. Expand upon this sentence.
 * 13) **Addressed.
 * 14) * The beginning of Finding Fett is very choppy as well.
 * 15) **Addressed.
 * 16) ***Looks good. —Tommy Dark side Master SWGTCG.jpg ( Nine two eight one ) 22:15, 24 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 17) * You don't mention a thing about Gev wanting revenge while she traveled with fett, nor her attack on him. This is in Bloodlines by the way.
 * 18) **Addressed.
 * 19) *** Could still use some work. It is understood that she probably wanted revenge because her mother wanted revenge, but you need to explicitly state that. You also mention her attacking Fett, but you do not say why; you just say she did it. Expand on that as well. —Tommy Dark side Master SWGTCG.jpg ( Nine two eight one ) 16:52, 28 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 20) ****Addressed.
 * 21) * Why was stopping Fett's aging important?
 * 22) **Addressed.
 * 23) * "But first, the pair traveled to Geonosis, to return the body of Fett's father, Jango Fett, to Mandalore to be buried."
 * 24) * Can't start a sentence with But.
 * 25) **Addressed.
 * 26) * Context for the Yuuzhan Vong War, and how it affected Mandalore.
 * 27) **Addressed.
 * 28) * "The hostility from the bartender led to an all out brawl, with the Mandalorians winning easily." Easily is POV, unless Fett or Gev said it was easy.
 * 29) **Addressed.
 * 30) * "After the fight, the bartender told Gev and Fett that Cherit's successor, Fraig, took over Cherit's position, and that Fraig could be found at the Tekshar Falls Casino." Redundant, delete and rewrite.
 * 31) **Addressed.
 * 32) * Expand upon their confrontation with Skirata.
 * 33) **Addressed.
 * 34) * Mention that Venku was Kad'ika.
 * 35) **Addressed.
 * 36) * Did Mirta really call Orade her boyfriend?
 * 37) **Addressed.
 * 38) * Expand upon what Mirta did during Sinta's treatment, and how Solo came to them during this time.
 * 39) **Addressed.
 * 40) ***I t could stand a tad more. Didn't Mirta give Sintas the Heart of Fire around that time? —Tommy Dark side Master SWGTCG.jpg ( Nine two eight one ) 04:00, 27 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 41) ****Addressed.
 * 42) ***** "In a meeting with Venku Skirata and his friend Gotab in a Keldabe tapcafe, Gotab revealed the location of Sintas Vel by using Kiffar abilities to read Vel's heart-of-fire stone." First of all, this is the Heart's first mention; you need to explain here what it is, and its significance. Secondly, you show it here as "heart-of-fire". Later, you show it as "Heart of Fire"&hellip;which is it? —Tommy Dark side Master SWGTCG.jpg ( Nine two eight one ) 20:44, 10 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 43) ******Addressed.
 * 44) * Per Jinzler on the expansion needed for the Second Battle of Fondor.
 * 45) **Addressed.
 * 46) * "This time it was a battle to protect the Verpine, an insectoid race who built the Tra'kads from the Imperial Remnant." I'm pretty sure that the Verpine allied with the Mandalorians for other reasons. Expand upon that.
 * 47) **Addressed.
 * 48) *** Not really. The Mandalorians didn't control the Verpine, they were business partners. —Tommy Dark side Master SWGTCG.jpg ( Nine two eight one ) 04:00, 27 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 49) ****Addressed.
 * 50) * Also, mention that the Mandolorians and the Jedi could not afford to lose the Verpine to Caedus and the Imperial Remnant, and the reason why they had to defend them.
 * 51) **Addressed.
 * 52) *** Not yet. This will be probably be addressed when you fix the one above. —Tommy Dark side Master SWGTCG.jpg ( Nine two eight one ) 16:52, 28 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 53) ****Yup, addressed.
 * 54) * Expand upon what exactly happened at Roche; like what Mirta and Solo did, and how the battle went.
 * 55) **Addressed.
 * 56) * Mention Fett's reaction to Mirta's capture, and what this meant.
 * 57) **Addressed.
 * 58) * Expand upon what happened when Mirta was resuced from the Anakin Solo by Solo, and how the war ended.
 * 59) **Addressed.
 * 60) * "but her subsequent whereabouts are unknown, due to the nanovirus preventing her return to Mandalore." Delete, we don't use unknown results.
 * 61) **Addressed.
 * 62) * "But once Gev finally met Fett, she was initially hostile, but eventually became friends with her grandfather." Not only do you use but twice in a setnence, but you start if off with it. Rewrite.
 * 63) **Addressed.
 * 64) * Why did Gev become firends with Fett?
 * 65) **Addressed.
 * 66) * You mention nothing about her friendship with Solo, nor her hatred of Jedi in the P&T.
 * 67) **Addressed.
 * 68) * You also mention nothing about her lust for revenge against Solo for killing her mother in the P&T, or the Bio.
 * 69) **Addressed.
 * 70) *** Only in the P&T do I see the change. —Tommy Dark side Master SWGTCG.jpg ( Nine two eight one ) 20:44, 10 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 71) ****Addressed.
 * 72) * P&T needs an expansion in general.
 * 73) **Addressed.
 * 74) * You don't use any info from the CSWE, besides when you mention the picture in the BtS.
 * 75) **Couldn't find much that wasn't in the article, but nevertheless found something. Addressed.  IFYLOFD  ( Come with me if you want to live. ) 04:09, 25 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 76) * You might be missing some things in the Sources section, make sure that Mirta isn't/is mentioned in any sourcebooks or Star Wars Insider issues.
 * 77) **Couldn't find any, but still looking. Hoo. Thanks for the (mind-blowingly harsh) review. :)  IFYLOFD  ( Come with me if you want to live. ) 04:09, 25 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 78) ***Yeah, couldn't find any other sources.  IFYLOFD  ( Come with me if you want to live. ) 23:57, 2 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 79) *This is missing a lot of info, and has a lot of short, confusing, choppy sentences. Make sure you contextify everything, watch your linking, and try to avoid colloquial language. DC 02:24, 19 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 80) Tommy:
 * 81) * "After the skirmish, Boba Fett, who thought that his granddaughter had been killed, became enraged at Jaina Solo and Jedi Master Luke Skywalker, blaming them for Gev's death, meaning that the aloof Fett truly did care for his granddaughter." This needs to be broken up and slightly reworded.
 * 82) **Addressed.
 * 83) * "Gev attacked Solo viciously both times they encountered each other in the battles of Roche and Fondor," How did she go from being Solo's friend to attacking her viciously?
 * 84) **Addressed.
 * 85) * Wasn't Mirta a special type of Mandalorian warrior?
 * 86) **No, I don't believe so.
 * 87) * You need to state sooner in the intro Mirta's homeworld.
 * 88) **Addressed.
 * 89) * Now do the same for the bio. —Tommy Dark side Master SWGTCG.jpg ( Nine two eight one ) 20:44, 10 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 90) **Addressed.
 * 91) *More coming. —Tommy Dark side Master SWGTCG.jpg ( Nine two eight one ) 05:16, 27 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 92) * You don't mention the Heart of Fire anywhere, actually.
 * 93) **Addressed.
 * 94) *** See the reference to the Heart of Fire in the midst of DC's objections, and this one will be resolved through that. —Tommy Dark side Master SWGTCG.jpg ( Nine two eight one ) 20:44, 10 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 95) ****Addressed.
 * 96) * The second and third sentences in the "Search for Skirata" section start with "The two".
 * 97) **Addressed. Thanks for the review.  IFYLOFD  ( Come with me if you want to live. ) 00:02, 3 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 98) * "When Gev tried to attack Caedus, she was slammed on her head by the Sith Lord, dealing her a severe injury." Expand on the extent of the injury, as it was expanded on in Invincible.
 * 99) **Addressed.
 * 100) * Also, you've been through the ringer enough to know by now how to spot over/underlinking. I've cleaned up some of it, but you really need to go through and make sure that the rest is done. —Tommy Dark side Master SWGTCG.jpg ( Nine two eight one ) 20:44, 10 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 101) **Addressed.
 * 102) * Also, where I you, I'd stick an image of Ghes somewhere, maybe in the P&T. —Tommy Dark side Master SWGTCG.jpg ( Nine two eight one ) 20:44, 10 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 103) **Addressed.
 * 104) Four Dot:
 * 105) * There should probably be some elaboration as to what Fett does on Vohai.
 * 106) * This is more a personal preference, but I think it would work better if you didn't keep refering to Orade as Gev's future husband, and let things pan out naturally.
 * 107) * There's a bit of repetition here and there, particularly in the last two sections of the bio. It feels a bit piecemeal, so I'd suggest a bit of a look through to make sure you're not saying the same things twice.
 * 108) * "Specifically, Caedus wanted to know who cut off his arm in the battle." - You might need to tell us about this dismembering a bit earlier. :P
 * 109) * The image of Gev and Orade's marriage would be really good in that Second Battle of Fondor, since it is the only image of any of the events depicted. You can probably bung the Jaina image in the P&T then.
 * 110) *Otherwise, very readable. I've made some of my own changes, here and there, but let me know if there are any that undermine anything you had intended originally. Good work overall. Thefourdotelipsis 00:16, 18 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 111) From the Chron-O-John of Green Tentacle:
 * 112) *Finding Fett: "&hellip;where he was staying for a meeting with his second-in-command, Goran Beviin." Mention why he has a second-in-command. Until now he's only been described as a bounty hunter.
 * 113) *Finding Fett: "&hellip;Corellian Chief of State Thrackan Sal-Solo&hellip;" Should it not be Head of State? Also, his job title should be linked to something.
 * 114) *Finding Fett: "&hellip;with Fett and Gev accompanied by ex-smuggler Han Solo&hellip;" Could use a quick mention of Han's link to Thrackan and why he wants to help.
 * 115) *Second Battle of Folor: "&hellip;Imperial Remnant leader Gilad Pellaeon had been murdered&hellip;" By who? Becomes clear later, but it would be better to say here. Green Tentacle (Talk) 18:24, 29 April 2009 (UTC)

Comments
 * I volunteer to take over DC's objections in light of his departure. In take over, I mean to merely verify that the objections have been addressed in accordance with the objection. An Inquisitor's review will be given as well, and, of course, only one vote will be cast. Please advise on the next course of action. —Tommy Dark side Master SWGTCG.jpg ( Nine two eight one ) 05:29, 28 February 2009 (UTC)
 * Done. —Tommy Dark side Master SWGTCG.jpg ( Nine two eight one ) 22:18, 14 April 2009 (UTC)

Bek-Vulkar gang war

 * Nominated by: Cylka  <font color=#00A693>-talk- 21:57, 18 February 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: Yes, it is another KotOR nomination.

(4 Inqs/0 Users/4 Total)
Support
 * 1) In good faith that our arrangement will be carried out.  Graestan ( Talk ) 03:56, 20 February 2009 (UTC)
 * 2) *Some users have mistakenly interpreted this comment to indicate some sort of underhanded deal between myself and the nominator. The message, in fact, was in reference to the nominator's agreement to handle still-outstanding objections despite my vote. Please assume good faith in the future. Graestan ( Talk ) 04:32, 11 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 3) Assuming Fiolli's objection is fixed.  Chack Jadson  (Talk)  22:48, 12 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 4) Thefourdotelipsis 03:52, 25 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 5) Be careful of POV and OR weasel words. &mdash;  Fiolli  {Alpheridies University ComNet} 02:37, 26 April 2009 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) Just one thing from Fiolli:
 * 2) * Maybe we can talk about this on IRC if there is a problem, but I think that there might need to be a section or subsection the on Republic officials (namely, Revan, Onasi, and Shan) who became entangled in the war. This could be a subsection under Hidden Beks, or another section with Participants. Your choice. &mdash; Fiolli  {Alpheridies University ComNet} 14:56, 8 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 3) **Added a snippet. Graestan ( Talk ) 03:09, 25 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 4) From the desk of Atarumaster88
 * 5) *The intro seems a little unclear with regards to Shan's status. It jumps from her being missing to her being the prize. Please clarify.
 * 6) **Addressed. Graestan ( Talk ) 02:46, 25 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 7) *Also, it'd be good to note that Revan agreed to race for the Beks in the intro.
 * 8) **Addressed. Graestan ( Talk ) 02:46, 25 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 9) *"Kang would have wanted first crack at the pods." Colloquialism.
 * 10) **I don't see the issue. Is there a particular rule against common figures of speech? Graestan ( Talk ) 02:46, 25 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 11) *"the two had a good idea of the situation" vague wording, and I'm not sure what "good idea" is supposed to represent in this case.
 * 12) **Replaced with "solid grasp." Graestan ( Talk ) 02:46, 25 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 13) *It would be good to point out that some of the Vulkars (Brejik) were Human.
 * 14) **Addressed. Graestan ( Talk ) 02:46, 25 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 15) *"the Vulkars were fairly harmless" POV.
 * 16) **As far as I know, this does not appear in the text of the article. Graestan ( Talk ) 02:46, 25 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 17) *Have a Super Terrific Friendly Un-frustrating day. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 16:18, 13 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 18) This might prove cumbersome, but I think Revan's transition from Jedi Knight to Dark Lord of the Sith needs to be touched upon briefly. Thefourdotelipsis 01:02, 18 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 19) *Added a paragraph to the article. Do you want it in the intro, too? Graestan ( Talk ) 03:09, 25 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 20) **No, that'd be too tubby. Thefourdotelipsis 03:52, 25 April 2009 (UTC)

Comments

Darth Nihl

 * Nominated by: DC 02:49, 20 February 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: The first in line for a project of mine that will see all major characters from Legacy be FA'd. This is just the beginning, beware.

(2 Inqs/1 Users/3 Total)
Support
 * 1) After a copyedit.  Chack Jadson  (Talk)  01:48, 6 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 2) –<font color="#c00">Victor  Redstarbird.svg ( talk page ) 05:49, 14 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 3) Thefourdotelipsis 22:07, 19 April 2009 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) I believe that in his succession boxes, you should mention what he is a Fist and Hand of; for example, "Fist of One Sith" would be one. –<font color="#c00">Victor  Redstarbird.svg ( talk page ) 05:43, 5 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 2) *I agree. Addressed, and thanks for the review, Victor. Please advise if anything further is required. —Tommy Dark side Master SWGTCG.jpg ( Nine two eight one ) 01:36, 8 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 3) Sure Tommy, no problem. Another thing I noticed is in the "Behind the scenes" there is nothing else about him except for his appearances. Is there nothing on his background or origins or anything by the authors of Legacy? (With sources of course) Also, I believed I spotted "Legacy" without italics and "hand" without capitalization, which should be capitalized since it is a proper noun. Now the following isn't really an objection as I'm not sure where I stand with the requirements on this, but shouldn't you simply tell us of which arcs Nihl appears in, without having to describe the plot? Since that is already summarized/told (and referenced) in the biography, I find it sort of redundant. But that's just a suggestion as far as I know. –<font color="#c00">Victor  Redstarbird.svg ( talk page ) 04:33, 11 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 4) *Hey, Vic. I took care of of the "Legacy" and "Hand" issues. I also provided some minimal insight into the character's name origin, though at this time I am unaware of any other sources that delve into the character's origins regarding the writers. As far as the redundancy, I feel that the opening statement of Nihl's BtS gives reason for the little explanations found after each appearance. I understand your point about it being repetetive, but I understand what DC was trying to do and feel it is still a beneficial part of the article. If, however, consensus is later decided against that stance, I have no problems with reworking the content so as not to repeat itself. Thanks again for your review, Squish. —Tommy Dark side Master SWGTCG.jpg ( Nine two eight one ) 20:52, 13 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 5) **That's understandable. Those are all the issues I found with this nomination. Nice job, to you and DC (even if he is gone). –<font color="#c00">Victor  Redstarbird.svg ( talk page ) 05:49, 14 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 6) "Instead, a search was warranted for Skywalker, in whom Krayt had an interest because of his potential to use the Force." - I think it's a bit more than that. Needs elaboration. Thefourdotelipsis 02:20, 18 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 7) *Addressed. thanks, Fourdot. —Tommy Dark side Master SWGTCG.jpg ( Nine two eight one ) 13:14, 19 April 2009 (UTC)

Comments
 * I volunteer to take over this nom, in light of DC's departure. —Tommy Dark side Master SWGTCG.jpg ( Nine two eight one ) 06:22, 27 February 2009 (UTC)
 * The illustration of Ossus in a section that describes events seven years later is quite jarring. I suggest that it either be removed or moved up to the relevant section. Thefourdotelipsis 02:20, 18 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Removed per your suggestion. —Tommy Dark side Master SWGTCG.jpg ( Nine two eight one ) 19:50, 19 April 2009 (UTC)

Celeste Morne
"M'lady, it's time. Shall we?" "We shall."
 * Nominated by:A joint production by —Tommy  Dark side Master SWGTCG.jpg ( Nine two eight one ) and <span style="font-variant: small-caps; font-family: times, cursive; font-size: 16px"><font color=#008080>Cylka  <span style="font-family: times, cursive; font-size: 13px"><font color=#00A693>-talk- 21:53, 26 February 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments:

- Tommy and Cylka, solidifying their partnership

(1 Inqs/1 Users/2 Total)
Support
 * 1) SingAurraSing
 * 2) Thefourdotelipsis 22:21, 18 April 2009 (UTC)

Object
 * "After receiving the message concerning a secret Imperial weapon abandoned on a moon, Vader's children, Luke Skywalker and Princess Leia Organa, led a team of Rebels to investigate." - You don't really need to call them Vader's children. It just makes things more confusing for a newcomer. Instead, describe them as Rebel agents, or something. Otherwise, very nice. Thefourdotelipsis 05:09, 18 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Addressed. Thank you for the review, Fourdot. Please advise if anything else is required. —Tommy Dark side Master SWGTCG.jpg ( Nine two eight one ) 12:22, 18 April 2009 (UTC)

Comments

Battle of Ryloth (Clone Wars)

 * Nominated by: Dark Lord Trayus and CC7567  [ http://images1.wikia.nocookie.net/starwars/images/thumb/5/5f/Rex.png/20px-Rex.png] talk 05:18, 15 March 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: Both of our first nominations for FA. Wish us luck!

(2 Inqs/1 Users/3 Total)
Support
 * 1) Looks good Kilson Likes PIE 17:36, 21 March 09 (UTC)
 * 2) "And that's the double truth, Ruth!" Thefourdotelipsis 08:00, 23 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 3)  Chack Jadson  (Talk)  23:56, 29 April 2009 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) Baby slithers with Lucius
 * 2) *Here is my review for the intro and prelude. Once these are addressed, I'll come back for another review,
 * 3) * The Clone Wars doesn't need that much context in the intro.
 * 4) **I believe it does; all it says is that was a conflict between the Republic and the Confederacy. I don't believe that's too much.  CC7567  (talk) 23:10, 20 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 5) ***Regarding the Clone Wars, to 99% of the people reading will know what they are. If not, they can click on the link and in the first sentence it'll tell them. That's why I disagree with large amounts of context: a title or an affiliation is fine for a person, organisation, vehichle, etc., but when your describing a war that takes up a huge chunk of the Star Wars timeline... A little much.  &mdash;Lucius malfoy7  Nute777.png ( Give it up for Lil' 'Soka Tano, ladies and gents! ) 20:13, 22 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 6) ****It's not our place to assume what Star Wars fans should know. The Clone Wars only take up three years of history, in comparison to other wars that last much longer. And they still need context. Please reconsider.  CC7567  (talk) 20:42, 22 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 7) *****In that case, I concede.  &mdash;Lucius malfoy7  Nute777.png ( Give it up for Lil' 'Soka Tano, ladies and gents! ) 20:55, 22 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 8) *Jedi Masters Mace Windu and Obi-Wan Kenobi, along with Jedi Knight Anakin Skywalker and Padawan Ahsoka Tano, were dispatched by the Jedi Council, along with a contingent of the Grand Army of the Republic, to liberate the planet. Needs rewording (without two along withs) or it should be treated as a run-on.
 * 9) **Addressed.  CC7567  (talk) 23:10, 20 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 10) ***Still rather run-on.  &mdash;Lucius malfoy7  Nute777.png ( Give it up for Lil' 'Soka Tano, ladies and gents! ) 20:13, 22 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 11) ****Addressed.  CC7567  (talk) 23:55, 22 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 12) * In the intro, expand a little more on the three Republic victories.
 * 13) **Addressed.  CC7567  (talk) 23:10, 20 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 14) * Again, the Clone Wars doesn't need that much context in the prelude.
 * 15) **I have to disagree; removing any more of it would remove the context altogether.  CC7567  (talk) 23:10, 20 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 16) ***See above.
 * 17) ****See above as well.  CC7567  (talk) 20:42, 22 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 18) * The Jedi Council devised a plan to invade and liberate Ryloth, with Jedi General Anakin Skywalker and his Padawan, Commander Ahsoka Tano, to breach the Confederacy blockade surrounding the planet, in order to allow Jedi Generals Mace Windu and Obi-Wan Kenobi to land with the invasion force, consisting of several units of the Republic's clone army manufactured for the Clone Wars, the Grand Army of the Republic. A run-on sentence.
 * 19) **Addressed.  CC7567  (talk) 23:10, 20 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 20) * &mdash;Lucius malfoy7  Nute777.png ( Give it up for Lil' 'Soka Tano, ladies and gents! ) 22:33, 20 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 21) Four Dot:
 * 22) * "...and remained by Supreme Chancellor Palpatine's side during the conflict." - What is the significance of this? Please elaborate or truncate.
 * 23) **It's outta there. Unless you have any ideas on how to extrapolate, we don't need it. Darth Trayus Sith_Emblem.svg ( Trayus Academy ) 04:46, 23 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 24) * "leaving the droids in charge of the remaining fleet." - Which droids? The tactical droids?
 * 25) **specified. Darth Trayus Sith_Emblem.svg ( Trayus Academy ) 04:46, 23 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 26) * "During a conference with Supreme Chancellor Palpatine, Senator Orn Free Taa, Grand Master Yoda, Admiral Yularen, and General Skywalker, the Jedi Knight reported that the space around Ryloth was secure." - Since Jedi Knight is a kind of umbrella term, and there are several Jedi involved here, you should probably specify who is making the statement.
 * 27) **specified. Darth Trayus  Sith_Emblem.svg ( Trayus Academy ) 04:46, 23 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 28) * "Soon after the battle had ended, Senator Taa, Syndulla, Windu and Commander Ponds watched a parade of the clone forces and the Twi'lek people." - This feels more like commentary of the episode. You should instead state that the Twi'lek people held a parade that was attended by Taa, Windu, etc.
 * 29) **Fixed up. Darth Trayus  Sith_Emblem.svg ( Trayus Academy ) 04:46, 23 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 30) *Otherwise, solid work. I quite enjoyed it. Thefourdotelipsis 01:30, 23 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 31) **Thank you on behalf of myself and CC7567. Darth Trayus  Sith_Emblem.svg ( Trayus Academy ) 04:46, 23 April 2009 (UTC)

Comments
 * Seriously? Still nothing? haha Dark Lord Trayus 08:56, 6 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Any civilian casualties? We have a |civilian=field if so... --Eyrezer 09:09, 6 April 2009 (UTC)
 * The only civilian casualties i can remember from the show are the village bombings. Were there any others? Dark Lord Trayus 19:00, 6 April 2009 (UTC)
 * I don't think there were any others. &mdash; CC7567 [ http://images1.wikia.nocookie.net/starwars/images/thumb/5/5f/Rex.png/20px-Rex.png] talk 20:30, 6 April 2009 (UTC)

Lok Durd

 * Nominated by: Kilson Likes PIE 15:34, 17 March 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments:If you add a big white beard, a big red suit, and substituted presents for the giant defoliator missiles, you got a regular Neimoidian Santa. Kilson Likes PIE 15:34, 17 March 2009 (UTC)

(1 Inqs/2 Users/3 Total)
Support
 * 1) Per pre-nom review. -- CC7567 [ http://images1.wikia.nocookie.net/starwars/images/thumb/5/5f/Rex.png/20px-Rex.png] talk 20:04, 19 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 2) Per changes addressed in review below; I'm amazed by the article's length for a single appearance.  &mdash;Lucius malfoy7  Nute777.png ( Give it up for Lil' 'Soka Tano, ladies and gents! )  20:21, 30 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 3) Thefourdotelipsis 22:39, 25 April 2009 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) Lucius's Look
 * 2) * Could you get a better opening quote? Great for the bio, but as an article header, not so much.
 * 3) **Expanded the quote; even though Tee Watt Kaa has dialogue in it, I took it out, since it doesn't matter that much. -- CC7567 [ http://images1.wikia.nocookie.net/starwars/images/thumb/5/5f/Rex.png/20px-Rex.png] talk 23:36, 29 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 4) * After landing on the planet and creating a small base camp, Lok tested the defoliator on a pair of droids, which turned out to be successful. The bolded is a little redundant, and the base wasn't that small.
 * 5) **Addressed. -- CC7567 [ http://images1.wikia.nocookie.net/starwars/images/thumb/5/5f/Rex.png/20px-Rex.png] talk 23:36, 29 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 6) * However, he was interrupted by three Jedi, Anakin Skywalker, his Togruta apprentice Ahsoka Tano, and Aayla Secura, who had crash landed on the planet prior to Lok's arrival. It should be: three Jedi : Anakin Skywalker, his Togruta apprentice...
 * 7) **Addressed Kilson
 * 8) ***Changed to: However, he was interrupted by Jedi Knight Anakin Skywalker, his Togruta apprentice Ahsoka Tano, and Twi'lek Jedi Knight Aayla Secura, who had crash landed on the planet prior to Lok's arrival. -- CC7567  [ http://images1.wikia.nocookie.net/starwars/images/thumb/5/5f/Rex.png/20px-Rex.png] talk 23:36, 29 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 9) * Sometime during the Clone Wars, Lok developed a defoliator weapon, an enhanced radiation weapon that could destroy all living matter while leaving inorganic material unharmed: his own combat troops, the battle droids. It should be: leaving inorganic material unharmed, such as his own combat troops, the battle droids.
 * 10) **Addressed Kilson
 * 11) * The Jedi and the clones were able to reach the colony before Lok and his forces, and told Watt Kaa about the defoliator and that Durd was planning to test it on them. It should be Tee Watt Kaa, as it is the first time you're mentioning him in the section. I would also split the rest of the sentence.
 * 12) **Addressed Kilson
 * 13) * Although his character is captured at the end of the episode, it appears that based on interviews with George Takei, Durd will be a recurring villain in the series. This is speculation.
 * 14) **It's speculation, yes, but it has evidence to an official source. The source gives evidence, and it's not speculation made by ourselves. I'm not sure if there's a policy on that, but I'm leaving it in for now. (The direct quote from the interview: "The final result is a truly memorable new addition to the SWCW universe. One that, even though he won’t say exactly when, appears to be a recurring character for the series.") -- CC7567 [ http://images1.wikia.nocookie.net/starwars/images/thumb/5/5f/Rex.png/20px-Rex.png] talk 23:36, 29 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 15) ***I missed that part in the interview... Sorry!  &mdash;Lucius malfoy7  Nute777.png ( Give it up for Lil' 'Soka Tano, ladies and gents! ) 17:56, 29 March 2009 (UTC) 20:21, 30 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 16) *Otherwise, great job. A surprisingly long article for one appearance, and lots of great supporting quotes and images.  &mdash;Lucius malfoy7  Nute777.png ( Give it up for Lil' 'Soka Tano, ladies and gents! ) 17:56, 29 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 17) Four Dot:
 * 18) * "Lok Durd was an overweight Neimoidian general and weapons developer in the Separatist Droid Army who served in the Clone Wars." - I don't really think that his being overweight is an important biographical detail that needs to be used to introduce him.
 * 19) * You use his first name almost exclusively, which is fairly informal. I'd like to see these instances changed to "Durd," although this isn't really a legal objection, so if you have good reason for doing otherwise, I'll relent. This goes for any other characters who you refer to informally.
 * 20) * "Sometime during the Clone Wars, Lok developed a defoliator weapon," - Whoa! Bang, straight into the story. You have to ease the reader in by introducing Durd. It's fairly simple, just say that he was a portly Neimoidian commander who served in the Confederacy of Independent Systems, or something to that effect.
 * 21) * Sometimes, you're straying too far from Durd's story, and you begin describing what the Jedi are doing. As a suggestion, go with this: Only tell us what Durd knows at a given time. That's the only stuff that is really relevant to his biography, after all, unless there's some huge secret that is revealed later on that you need to set up earlier (IIRC, there is no such thing in the TCW episode).
 * 22) *More to come later. Thefourdotelipsis 01:53, 23 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 23) Six Hours Later
 * 24) * For instance, this entire paragraph: "The two battle droids were quickly engulfed by the shockwave. Rex and Bly, now realizing they were in danger, tried to run away from the shockwave, but it began to catch up to them. Rex managed to fire the grappling hook of his blaster at the tree and swung to safety, but Bly fell behind. Secura, realizing that he would not survive, swung down from the tree using a vine, picked up Bly and pulled him back to safety." - That has no relevance to Durd whatsoever. That, and any segments like it should be pitched out in their entirety. As a guide, go with this: Don't even mention Secura, Skywalker et al, until the battle itself, because before this, what they do is entirely unrelated to Durd. If you can weed out any info on them before they meet Durd in battle, you'll be OK.
 * 25) * Another such entire paragraph that has to go is the last paragraph of "Testing the defoliator"
 * 26) * And the first paragraph of "Battle of Maridun"
 * 27) * "However, a glance through a pair of electrobinoculars revealed to him the presence of the Jedi" - Bingo. That's where you introduce the Republic forces. Never mind every thing else before that.
 * 28) * "When Skywalker saw that the Separatists were loading the defoliator, he ordered the shield generators to be activated. As a deflector shield enveloped the colony, Skywalker told his Togruta apprentice that if the enemy couldn't beat them from far away, then they would be forced to engaged them in close combat." - But then this, I could copy and paste into my Anakin subpage. You really need to rigorously go through this info, and make sure you're telling it from Durd's perspective.
 * 29) * I don't mean to sound harsh with this review, but basically, you need to remove a hell of a lot of info from this, and make sure what you're left with is telling the story from the given character's perspective. Thefourdotelipsis 08:27, 23 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 30) **OK, I changed around the info the way you asked. You can reword anything you see wrong on the article if you want, but I can do it instead if you don't want too. Also, I changed around some pictures to fit the new article, what do you think? Kilson Likes PIE 03:43, 24 April 09 (UTC)
 * 31) ***A large improvement, but you still need to change all uses of his first name to his surname. Also, you still have far too much info on the Republic force's movements, and you still have a lot of detail as to their precise movements and sentiments during the battle. If you want, I can make the cuts and changes that are needed, and then you can make any further tweaks you want. I'd be more than happy to do that. Thefourdotelipsis 04:34, 25 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 32) ****That is way too much work for me to ask you. Don't worry, I'll fix these objections and then you can make any small edits that are needed. Kilson Likes PIE 04:40, 25 April 09 (UTC)
 * 33) *****I shortened it up a little more. Feel free to edit where needed now. Kilson Likes PIE 06:02, 25 April 09 (UTC)
 * 34) ******I've gone ahead and made the required cuts: It's still well over 1000 words. Now, if you feel that my cuts are unfair, feel free to revert, and we'll keep hashing it out. If you're satisfied, however, I'll go ahead and support. Thefourdotelipsis 08:46, 25 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 35) *******I guess it's ok. I would have left a little bit more info, but you're the Ing, so I'll go with what you've done. Kilson Likes PIE 17:53, 25 April 09 (UTC)
 * 36) Xwing328:
 * 37) *"overconfident, condescending, and power-crazed" seems a little too much like OR and POV.
 * 38) *Overall very play-by-play. We don't need so many "he did this, then he did this, then he breathed, then he did this too" details. —Xwing328 (Talk) 18:19, 26 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 39) **I addressed the two objection. I changed what I said in the PTS to what it said in his databank entry. Kilons Likes PIE 22:42, 26 April 09 (UTC)

Comments

Yun

 * Nominated by: QuiGonJinn There's always a bigger fish. 18:20, 20 March 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: "He is a Jedi. He deserves a FAN."

(2 Inqs/2 Users/4 Total)
Support
 * 1) I think that the article is featured article material. <font face="Arial"> ZEM  talk to me!   05:44, 30 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 2) Thefourdotelipsis 23:43, 24 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 3)  Chack Jadson  (Talk)  11:49, 26 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 4) This article IS FA material. --Clonehunter 14:43, 26 April 2009 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) Find out who voiced him in the radio dramas. Mauser 11:00, 22 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 2) *According to Dark Forces: The Collector's Trilogy audio drama, Timothy Kuhlmann. --Craven 16:30, 30 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 3) **Wow, thanks Craven. I was looking in the web and couldn't find any info. QuiGonJinn There's always a bigger fish. 17:14, 30 March 2009 (UTC)
 * 4) Four Dot:
 * 5) * "Indirectly, Yun continued to help Katarn even after his death; it was Yun's lightsaber that Katarn used to defeat Jerec and save the galaxy from his evil." - Evil is POV.
 * 6) **Removed the entire part about "saving the galaxy".
 * 7) * "In order for his plans to come to fruition, however, he needed the power of the Valley of the Jedi, a Force nexus formed in the outcome of the New Sith Wars, when the souls of numerous Jedi and Sith were trapped in the Valley as a result of the explosion of the thought bomb, a powerful weapon detonated by Lord Kaan, one of the last leaders of the Sith during that period." - This sentence should be broken up.
 * 8) **Broken up into two sentences.
 * 9) * "Rahn and his Rebel companions" - Which Rebel companions? You need to introduce them a few sentences earlier, or properly introduce them there.
 * 10) **Introduced.
 * 11) * "Sariss then gave Yun his next assignment&mdash;to find out what happened to Patrol Zulu, Able, Mary 341, which was long overdue." - Overdue for what?
 * 12) **Not for what. "Overdue" here means: "delayed beyond an appointed time".
 * 13) * Too much detail in the first paragraph of the "Differences between versions" section. And the second paragraph too. Don't specify the dialogue changes, just mention that there are dialogue changes. Thefourdotelipsis 00:33, 24 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 14) **Cut the section in half. QuiGonJinn There's always a bigger fish. 16:00, 24 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 15) What happens after they meet Arden Lyn? You mention that he meets her but don't talk about it at all after that point.  Chack Jadson  (Talk)  17:13, 25 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 16) *See ref #7. The scenario is open-ended. QuiGonJinn There's always a bigger fish. 17:16, 25 April 2009 (UTC)

Comments

Jerjerrod

 * Nominated by: Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 20:23, 26 March 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: Been working on this for a long time.

(4 Inqs/0 Users/4 Total)
Support
 * 1) Thefourdotelipsis 21:54, 22 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 2)  Cavalier One FarStar Logo.jpg( Squadron channel ) 08:35, 23 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 3)  Grunny  ( Talk ) 03:06, 24 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 4)  Graestan ( Talk ) 14:27, 26 April 2009 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) Toprawa and Ralltiir is not as forgiving as I am:
 * 2) * Change the pronunciation to real IPA characters. What's there looks just plain ridiculous.
 * 3) **Done, thanks for the help.
 * 4) * Can we get a main image where the top of his hat isn't cropped off and his mouth isn't open? You can see the spittle between his lips.
 * 5) **Culator took care of it.
 * 6) * A character of this caliber deserves some external links.
 * 7) **I think there were some originally, but two of them linked to non-existent pages on StarWars.com, and another was to a fan site of some sort.
 * 8) ***I've added the two StarWars.com links back, though they still don't work. I don't know if there are any other relevant external links. Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 23:35, 8 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 9) ****Moar plz. At least his Databank stuff. Perhaps you can site search SW.com using Google. Graestan ( Talk ) 04:04, 11 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 10) *****I've been unable to find any more, and the Databank link doesn't belong as an external link. Do you know of any others? Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 11:16, 17 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 11) * The image caption punctuation needs to be gone over more closely; punctuate only in cases of a complete thought.
 * 12) **Should be good now.
 * 13) ***I got the last one. Graestan ( Talk ) 04:04, 11 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 14) * It's not even stated in that first sentence of the intro that Jerjerrod worked for the Empire.
 * 15) **Done.
 * 16) * His initial job for the Empire belongs in the intro.
 * 17) **Done.
 * 18) * His birth on Tinnel IV, if any source explicitly states that, needs to be in the intro and body. If not, then it needs to be removed from the "Homeworld" field of the infobox.
 * 19) **Removed from infobox.
 * 20) * Pick whether you're going to call the Executor a Star Dreadnought or a Super Star Destroyer, and only use one version. Otherwise, people who haven't read Saxton's baloney will be confused as to whether there are more than one ship being referred to.
 * 21) **Done.
 * 22) * The transition of "officially" to "unofficially" is a bit blatant. Can something more smooth be found, that states more explicitly that the official reason was nonsense and the unofficial one was the actual one?
 * 23) **Done.
 * 24) * That there was a shield set up to protect the Death Star and where it was generated from should be established where the bunker is first mentioned.
 * 25) **Done.
 * 26) * Gurdun needs some context&mdash;his name out of nowhere means little.
 * 27) **Done.
 * 28) * Endicott, too.
 * 29) **Done.
 * 30) * Skywalker's captivity must be set up before it is referred to.
 * 31) **Done.
 * 32) * All that introspective stuff really belongs more in the P&T than the bio. Actions belong more in the bio, thoughts more in the P&T. Please slim it down.
 * 33) **Moved almost a whole paragraph to the P&T. Let me know how it looks.
 * 34) ***Just fine, but I'd almost resort the information in the P&T. Add things from the other two that are pertinent to the new paragraph. Good job, nonetheless. Graestan ( Talk ) 04:04, 11 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 35) * There really needs to be a Legacy section about what happened due to the Death Star's destruction&mdash;and, in terms of Jerjerrod not carrying out his orders, what didn't happen.
 * 36) **Done.
 * 37) * Jerjerrod's attitude about hurrying should be moved further back into the P&T to read less repetitively with the quote that it stems from.
 * 38) **Done.
 * 39) * The second alternate version in the BtS is written pretty stiffly. Please increase the flow. Also, the setup of that particular story leaves me hanging; where in the movie does it take place, I find myself asking. Be more specific about where the changes would occur.
 * 40) **I've done my best with that, given that I don't have the Annotated Screenplays and only have the relevant info in an email. You did say you were going to try to fix this, didn't you? Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 11:16, 17 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 41) * Two of those redlinks have to be single-source. Can they be eliminated by the man who did all the research to write this article?
 * 42) **Done.
 * 43) * I think perhaps the image of Jerjerrod being freaked out at the mention of the Emperor should move to the P&T, and the image of Vader choking him should be moved further into the BtS, to balance things out a bit towards the top of the bio.
 * 44) **Done.
 * 45) * Graestan ( Talk ) 14:45, 8 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 46) **I'll take care of the rest sometime later today. Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 15:41, 8 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 47) Four Dot:
 * 48) * In the intro, you go a bit too in depth, in stating that Jerjerrod was there to greet Vader in 3 ABY, was there to greet Palpatine on the Death Star, and was in Palpatine's throne room, etc. Best to pare these down and keep the intro to significant biographical details.
 * 49) **I left in the bit on his presences on the Executor (because it's so random) and at the Emperor's arrival (because I figured that I needed to say that the Emperor did arrive). I did remove the bit on his appearance in the throne room, because he really doesn't do anything there.
 * 50) * "The Emperor decided to make Jerjerrod his puppet." - You need to elaborate on this a bit more, simply by saying that Palpatine found Jerjerrod easy to manipulate or something. Before this, you haven't really told us that Palpatine needed someone malleable, just that he didn't want ambitious men in charge.
 * 51) **I just removed it, because an explanation would just be repeating the info said in the previous sentence.
 * 52) * "Jerjerrod had originally cursed Supervisor Gurdun, the man behind the IG-88 program, now tasked with overseeing the computer core's journey, for not accompanying the core to the battlestation—in fact, he had accompanied it until the IG-88 unit killed him—but found it better than the supervisor had not been there to complicate the already delicate matter of bringing the Death Star's construction back on schedule." - This needs to be broken up.
 * 53) **Done.
 * 54) * "As the stormtrooper droids unloaded the core," - You need to either explain that these are droids beforehand.
 * 55) **Done.
 * 56) * "Lord Vader arrived in the Endor system via the Imperial II-class Star Destroyer Avenger[14] and took a shuttle to the incomplete Death Star. Jerjerrod was informed of the Dark Lord's arrival by docking bay technician Lieutenant Endicott's men, and flanked by Imperial officers, Jerjerrod waited patiently at the bottom of the shuttle's ramp. The commander greeted Vader, calling his arrival an "unexpected pleasure," but the Dark Lord of the Sith cut him off." - This is a bit too PBP.
 * 57) **PBP?
 * 58) ***Nevermind; Tope told me. I've removed the last sentence there, as it really wasn't necessary. Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 22:47, 21 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 59) * "When the Emperor arrived in-system aboard the Executor and took his shuttle" - You've cited this to ROTJ, but I don't recall ROTJ ever stating that Palpatine arrived on the Executor. Have you attributed it to the right source?
 * 60) **Whoops, I didn't. I'll have to find where that came from.
 * 61) ***I removed "aboard the Executor" - apparently I misinterpreted it. Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 22:47, 21 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 62) *More to come later. Thefourdotelipsis 01:49, 21 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 63) Cav is here to put you back on schedule:
 * 64) * Jerjerrod, a Human male, started his Imperial career as a desk general in Logistics and Supply and eventually rose through the ranks. - I doubt he started his career at the rank of general, which this seems to imply. Please clarify. - Cavalier One FarStar Logo.jpg( Squadron channel ) 09:12, 21 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 65) **"Desk general" is the wording used in the source. I don't know what else to use there to avoid confusion. Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 11:12, 21 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 66) ***I did a little reshuffle. Let me know what you think, and if it accurately reflects the source. - Cavalier One FarStar Logo.jpg( Squadron channel ) 16:08, 22 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 67) ****Apparently I did misread it. GG5 says he was a desk general who had risen through the ranks in Logistics and Supply, not a desk general who then rose through the ranks in Logistics and Supply. Sorry about that. Looks good now. Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 19:59, 22 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 68) Four Dot II: The Wrath of Kahn
 * 69) * "Smiling, and with sixty seconds left until firing, Jerjerrod sat calmly as he gazed out of the viewscreen." - Too much detail.
 * 70) **Done.
 * 71) * The Legacy section has me a tad confused. Does the ROTJ novel flat out state that Jerjerrod's disobeying of Palpatine took over 30 seconds, or something to that effect? Similarly, the idea that it would not have secured Imperial victory seems to be speculation as well. I certainly don't think there's anything in ROTJ stating that. I realize that this was suggested in another objection, but I don't think there's any factual meat here. I think that stating that the Alliance won and that Vader and Palpatine died is quite important, but the rest is a bit of a stretch. Unless, of course, there is a source for those statements. Thefourdotelipsis 23:27, 21 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 72) **Removed. Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 23:43, 21 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 73) ***I'm still not sure that his hesitation spared Endor. Is that stated? Thefourdotelipsis 00:51, 22 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 74) ****Had he followed the Emperor's command to the letter, he would have rotated the Death Star to fire on Endor immediately after the shield bunker was destroyed. I'll clarify a little bit more. Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 11:11, 22 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 75) *****Right, I getcha. Thefourdotelipsis 21:54, 22 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 76) Dude, there's a Cite Error.  Graestan ( Talk ) 15:47, 22 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 77) *Calm down, Grae, it's not the end of the world. :p Xicer fixed it. Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 19:59, 22 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 78) One minor thing: "Jerjerrod waited patiently at the bottom of the shuttle's ramp." Do we know he was waiting "patiently"? Since you have it sourced to the movie, he may look like he was patient, but may have been hiding impatience or some emotion. So was this meant to be sourced to the novelization?  Grunny  ( Talk ) 15:34, 23 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 79) *Yes, it was meant to be sourced to the novelization, but I guess I overlooked that when sourcing it. Fixed now. Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 22:37, 23 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 80) Needs information from Shadows of the Empire Sourcebook. Page 26 as far as I can see, unless there's more. - Lord Hydronium 06:33, 28 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 81) *Done. Grand Moff Tranner [[Image:Imperial Department of Military Research.svg|20px]] (Comlink) 14:45, 30 April 2009 (UTC)

Comments

Sneevel

 * Nominated by: Skippy Farlstendoiro 08:17, 6 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: Previously GA, exceeded the 1000-word mark while checking oppositions for the nomination.

(4 Inqs/1 Users/5 Total)
Support
 * 1) I dig the opening quote. Thefourdotelipsis 10:44, 24 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 2) —Tommy  Dark side Master SWGTCG.jpg ( Nine two eight one ) 12:02, 24 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 3) --Eyrezer 23:39, 24 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 4)  Darth Trayus  Sith_Emblem.svg ( Trayus Academy ) 19:28, 26 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 5)  Chack Jadson  (Talk)  00:47, 28 April 2009 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) From the Trayus Academy in sunny Malibu, CA
 * 2) * Fifty-one word intro can definitly be expanded.
 * 3) **Done, see if you like it.
 * 4) * Use of the term "egotistic" is a bit POVish.
 * 5) **Done, albeit not by me.
 * 6) * Bit of context on podracing and why it was dangerous couldn't hurt. Same for Horizon Skimming.
 * 7) **Done; you know as much about H.S. as I do: Sneevels have made great inroads into exploration (...), scientific experimentation (...), dangerous sports (like Podracing and horizon skimming), and creative fields such as fiction, holovids, music and visual arts.--Skippy Farlstendoiro 13:19, 15 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 8) *Darth Trayus(Trayus Academy) Sith_Emblem.svg:53, 6 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 9) Prepare to be Savaged...
 * 10) *Nice to see another alien species article up at FAN! I think this one is pretty good. It needs a bit more expansion, spit, and polish, and I think it will be ready. Here are my concerns:
 * 11) ** The lead section should be expanded to about two paragraphs. Expand on what's there now and then split it wherever it seems most logical to do so. Take a look at other alien species FAs for ideas on how to do this.
 * 12) ***Increased, see if you like it.
 * 13) ** The "Biology and appearance" section can be expanded some more. Currently, it seems like you are only repeating information that appears in text form in the sources, but don't forget the source images as well! From pictures of Roor in Podracing Tales, for example, we can tell that Sneevels have five fingers and toes, claws, and tails, and just from the infobox, we can see they have pug noses, hairy brows, and upward-pointing canines. In other words, take a good, hard look at all published images of Sneevels and expand the "Biology and appearance" section with what you see.
 * 14) ***Have a look; notice that Roor is the only Sneevel who has seen graphically-depicted. I'm trying not to assume that his traits are, or are not, the norm. That thing braiding his mane might be a jewel, or a natural external bone of the species.
 * 15) ****Looks good. I've copy edited it a bit; hope you don't mind! I agree with not treating Roor as representative; that'd be like treating Keith Richards as representative of the human species on Earth, I think. ~ SavageBob 03:47, 18 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 16) ** "They excelled at creative fields, including visual arts, holovid, and music." Holovid what? Production? Acting? Please elaborate.
 * 17) ***Not specified in source; reworded.
 * 18) ** "Like many Sneevels, Roor was rude in person". If this is a common species trait, it should be mentioned under "Society and culture" as well.
 * 19) ***Added.
 * 20) **** Better, but that whole paragraph would fit better under "Society and culture," sice all Sneevels act like that, not just the ones off Sneeve. ~ SavageBob 06:34, 16 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 21) *****OK.--Skippy Farlstendoiro 07:17, 16 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 22) ** "Sneeve senator Jollin Resbin was mentioned in the galaxy-wide press as of 22 BBY." This sounds awkward, and I'm not sure what the point is of mentioning this. Could you clarify?
 * 23) ***Clarified?
 * 24) ** I'm confused about the info in "Behind the scenes" concerning Roor's appearance in The Phantom Menace. Was a CG character design created, but just didn't make the final cut of the film? It would be helpful to know when the character was designed and by whom, whether it was the production team on TPM or the video game folks, or the comic book folks.
 * 25) ***Puppet; designer added; sculptor unknown.
 * 26) ** Is Boles Roor a playable character in Star Wars: Episode I Racer? If so, this would be good to mention under BTS, along with general info about how he compares to the other racers (faster or stronger or whatever). (Likewise for any other video games he's in.)
 * 27) ***I commonly tried to include that kind of information in the body (Roor is a bad mechanic in the games), commonly including gaming stats for video games and RPG games; added to BTS; I still think that info should only be in Roor's article.
 * 28) ** It looks like not all sources and appearances are referenced in the body of the article. Please comb through them again to see if you can glean any information from them and add them to the citations.
 * 29) ***Rebel Force added, only Fact Files pending... --Skippy Farlstendoiro 06:59, 24 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 30) **It's likely that Roor and the Sneevels are mentioned in the Fact Files. There are several FFs about the podracers of TPM. Please check (or ask someone to check) so that we can ensure that all sources are listed and used.
 * 31) *I've added a few other comments below that are merely suggestions, so please check there too and follow as you see fit. Good work, and I hope to see this one get its star soon! ~ SavageBob 02:04, 10 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 32) One eight two nine:
 * 33) * "In 13,975 BBY, Duros explorers discovered Sneeve, and the Sneevels joined the galactic community." What does the Duros' arrival have to do with the Sneevels' joining the galactic community? Please provide some context.
 * 34) **Added
 * 35) * "Resbin had personal contact with superstar Roor, by then retired, and he used the connection to his advantage." What does this have to do anything? It doesn't to seem to fit into the surrounding prose. —Tommy Dark side Master SWGTCG.jpg ( Nine two eight one ) 12:52, 23 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 36) **It made more sense in the first draft; in fact, I think it's no longer relevant for the species' article (Roor's and Resbin's article should include that info, thou). --Skippy Farlstendoiro 06:59, 24 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 37) Four Dot:
 * 38) * "When Sneevels were disgruntled, they released a black-colored gas that rose in a spiral from their heads." - Is there a text source for this, or is it just based on the comic book imagery? I only ask this because it is fairly common, in comic strips, for disguntled characters to display a black spiral of "gas", and I'm pretty sure that's what it is in Podracing Tales.
 * 39) **Your insight serves you well; that's it &mdash; but it's still a canonical black spiral. Imagine that the only source featuring a Sneevel in the dark is a toon-style comic-book where the eyes glow as in Bugs Bunny (common in toon style, infrequent in "live-action style"). Then, we could say (and source) that the eyes of a Sneevel visibly glow in the dark. --Skippy Farlstendoiro 09:10, 24 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 40) ***We could, but we probably shouldn't. What if the only instance of a Sneevel actually speaking is in a comic? Would we say that "Sneevels, when speaking, would emit a large white bubble, featuring a black outline and a short, sharp protrusion pointing into the speaker's mouth. Within the large white bubble was the speaker's words, rendered in the alternate Basic alphabet." Or, alternatively, "When moving at a rapid speed, the Sneevel would leave behind parallel lines that would later dissipate." I don't mean to be snarky here, but you see what I mean. Thefourdotelipsis 09:16, 24 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 41) ****Line removed, even if I 100% disagree with your POV. I still believe the opening crawl means that, sometimes, there's a spacial phenomena causing the appearance of yellow characters in the vacuum. And a four-dot elipsis. --Skippy Farlstendoiro 09:42, 24 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 42) *****Hope springs eternal. Thefourdotelipsis 10:44, 24 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 43) * Perhaps a brief mention of the Empire's rise to power in the Republic's stead following the Clone Wars when you first mention the Empire would be useful.
 * 44) **Reworded. Also, background for Separatist Crisis.
 * 45) * "These latter two articles are taken to be canonical, as they are the more recently published." - Not quite how it works, perhaps it's better if you say that for the purposes of the article, the more recent sources are being used. Thefourdotelipsis 08:08, 24 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 46) **Reworded.--Skippy Farlstendoiro 09:42, 24 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 47) Can you expand the intro at all? I really feel that a longer intro is needed.  Chack Jadson  (Talk)  12:31, 26 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 48) *Expanded; now I cannot think of anything else to add. --Skippy Farlstendoiro 11:50, 27 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 49) **It's good.  Chack Jadson  (Talk) 00:47, 28 April 2009 (UTC)

Comments
 * Was there anything to add from Rebel Force: Target? --Eyrezer 08:35, 6 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Yep. I forgot. Thank you. --Skippy Farlstendoiro 06:59, 24 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Cool. --Eyrezer 23:39, 24 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Just a few additional ideas:
 * Boles Roor has a fairly significant role in Podracing Tales. Might there be a few more quotes from him that could be peppered through the article?
 * Similarly, Podracing Tales shows a few full-body images of Roor. One of these would be great to drop into either the infobox or the "Biology and appearance" section.
 * Any preference?
 * Actually, I like the one you've got in there with the guitar-like instrument. However, take a look at these two images here and here. The first would be better for the infobox, since it's a full-body shot, and the second would be good for the BTS section. Both were uploaded by Sompeetalay on the .nl wiki; if he can tell us where he got them (the source), we could upload them here and use them. If you agree, maybe drop him a line on his talk page either here or at .nl? ~ SavageBob 23:50, 16 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Although they're not required, I always find page numbers very helpful when reading through a notes section. If you could add them, that'd be great, but it's up to you! ~ SavageBob 02:04, 10 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Thanks, but I think I won't do it in this article.--Skippy Farlstendoiro 07:17, 16 April 2009 (UTC)

Viqi "Vichy" Shesh

 * Nominated by: -- Harrar 14:02, 6 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: Cold-hearted collaborator. And guest nom for WP:NEGTC!

(1 Inqs/1 Users/2 Total)
Support
 * 1) Image is beautiful now and it really is a great article. Dark Lord Trayus 23:57, 8 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 2) "Fascinating captain, and logical too." Thefourdotelipsis 08:53, 25 April 2009 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) The image you're using of Coruscant is from Episode II. It needs to be replaced by an image from a time closer to the events of Shesh's life. Perhaps this one - it is at least from the YV War. --Eyrezer 08:55, 22 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 2) *I'm going to cut images from this section entirely. While having a picture from 19 BBY is not cool, having a picture of a pitched battle doesn't work either. If only there was a picture of Coruscant all overgrown and gross. -- —Harrar  MR T.Lah.jpg ( Villip ) 09:02, 23 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 3) **Maybe a crop of the Japanese Traitor cover? (This isn't an objection, by the way, if you don't want it or it doesn't work.) - Lord Hydronium 20:21, 27 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 4) ***For some reason I completely forgot about the Japanese covers. I uploaded it and stuck it in. Feel free to move it around, anyone. Good call, Hydro. -- —Harrar  ( Villip ) 20:41, 27 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 5) Four Dot:
 * 6) * "Coruscant fell to the Yuuzhan Vong warmaster just as Tsavong Lah had always planned and despite Shesh's earlier efforts to appease the invaders with Duro and the Jedi." - This sentence doesn't read right to me.
 * 7) ** Changed to: "Coruscant fell to the Yuuzhan Vong warmaster&mdash;just as Tsavong Lah had always intended&mdash;and Shesh's earlier efforts to appease the invaders by delivering Duro and the Jedi were shown to have been futile."
 * 8) * You seem to use Tsavong Lah's full name a lot. Is there any particular reason for this?
 * 9) ** Not particularly! Going through the article I removed 15+ Tsavongs, changing it to "Lah" or "Warmaster Lah" or "warmaster"
 * 10) * Is the quote in the Legacy of treason section attributed to the right source? I've never read Star by Star, but I would have thought that was from the NEC.
 * 11) ** Good spot; I'd copied the template from one of the other quotations and forgot to change the attribution.
 * 12) *Otherwise, utterly superb, and highly compelling. My only other complaint is that you've sourced a lot of self-sourcing statements in the Bts. Thefourdotelipsis 04:30, 25 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 13) **I removed the BtS sourcing. Thanks for your kind words, I really enjoyed writing it! -- —Harrar  MR T.Lah.jpg ( Villip ) 08:44, 25 April 2009 (UTC)

Comments
 * Viqi Shesh is 100Kbs, yes, and the FA page is a bit choked but I figured I don't care how long she's up here for and she can be read in chunks. She's an odd character to write because we tend to see the manifestation of her actions rather than her actions a lot of the time. -- Harrar 14:02, 6 April 2009 (UTC)
 * That headshot of Viqi in the infobox looks really warped. At least on my computer it does. Xicer9 Atgar.svg( Rawr) 10:26, 7 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Its not just yours. It hurts my eyes. Dark Lord Trayus 19:49, 7 April 2009 (UTC)
 * I've been reliably informed by JMAS that this is due to the fact that Wikia has not yet updated its cache. It's the proper dimensions, but the cache needs updating. Harrar 22:26, 7 April 2009 (UTC)

Valin Draco

 * Nominated by:Jinzler 00:05, 7 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments:My first FA nom

(1 Inqs/0 Users/0 Total)
Support
 * 1) Thefourdotelipsis 22:40, 27 April 2009 (UTC)

Object Comments
 * 1) Eyrezer:
 * 2) * "a plan to infiltrate Admiral Gilder Varth into the Alderaanian Resistance and the Sarlacc Project, the construction of a Super Star Destroyer prototype." It sounds as though Varth infiltrated both the resistance, and the Project. Can you re-wrod this? --Eyrezer 02:50, 14 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 3) **Done --Jinzler 10:11, 14 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 4) * " In the fight that followed, they almost killed each other." This and the following sentence sounds a bit awkward. Can you reword it? --Eyrezer 09:13, 15 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 5) **Done --Jinzler 20:33, 15 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 6) Four Dot:
 * 7) * "He became involved in various secret plots including a plan to infiltrate Admiral Gilder Varth into the Alderaanian Resistance, a resistance group based on Alderaan, to find evidence that Senator Bail Organa had betrayed the Empire and was secretly leading it." - Leading the Empire? I don't think so. :P You should reword this.
 * 8) **He would have been a better leader of it than Palpatine. I have rewrote this --Jinzler 22:09, 27 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 9) * "and acquiring a Star Courier, the Scimitar—the former personal ship of the Sith Lord Darth Maul—although it is unknown if it was the same craft or not." - Well, if it's a Star Courier called Scimitar, it is the same ship, at least for our intents and purposes. You don't need to add the qualifier.
 * 10) **I have removed the stuff about it being the Scimitar. I don't know who added this, as I'm pretty sure that Starships of the Galaxy just says that it may or may not be the Scimitar --Jinzler 22:09, 27 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 11) * "She had traveled to Coruscant when she learned of Order 66, to confront those responsible for destroying the Jedi Order and so preventing her from having revenge against them." - This doesn't make a lot of sense.
 * 12) **Hopefully, it does now --Jinzler 22:09, 27 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 13) * You should make some mention of the Empire's rise in the Republic's stead.
 * 14) **Added --Jinzler 22:09, 27 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 15) * "The Alderaanian Resistance sent a team to free Varth[4] and Draco had ensured that they were easily able to do so, by limiting the number of Imperial troops, under the guise of keeping the facility secret." - This doesn't read well.
 * 16) **Rewrote --Jinzler 22:09, 27 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 17) * "While the Legacy Era Campaign Guide does not explicitly state the familial bond, it is strongly implied in the entry for Antares Draco; it is noted that an ancestor of Antares was a member of the Inquisitorius under Emperor Palpatine." - If that's the case, why is the Legacy Era Campaign guide listed as a source? Thefourdotelipsis 02:24, 26 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 18) **Removed. It's a shame we don't have a "possible mention" template, as we have a one --Jinzler 22:09, 27 April 2009 (UTC)

Gallandro

 * Nominated by: Havac 23:51, 7 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: Daley + WEG + hired killer=awesome. Now if only KJA hadn't screwed around with it. Havac 23:51, 7 April 2009 (UTC)

(1 Inqs/0 Users/0 Total)
Support
 * 1) Thefourdotelipsis 22:42, 27 April 2009 (UTC)

Object Comments
 * 1) Add a couple more images. For instance, an image of Odumin wouldn't go amiss. --Eyrezer 03:32, 8 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 2) *I generally don't like to do that unless the article is really bereft of images and I'd just be presenting the reading with a big wall of text. For this, I don't think an image every other section is amiss. I'd rather not get into "Han Solo: Gallandro shot him" "The Mor Glayyd: Gallandro was going to duel him" territory unless I really have to, and I don't think this is really a case of have-to. Havac 04:31, 8 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 3) **There are some pretty big walls of text there... I think an image of Anja would be entirely appropriate for the legacy section. --Eyrezer 05:21, 8 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 4) ***See how you like that. Havac 22:06, 8 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 5) ****I guess that will do. --Eyrezer 23:19, 10 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 6) Four Dot:
 * 7) * The intro is just a touch too gargantuan. Out of kindness to the main page, do you think you could trim it down?
 * 8) **Trimmed. Havac 03:25, 27 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 9) * "As he looked at the orphans like himself, Gallandro realized he had no sympathy for them." - This could be worded a little better. "Like himself" doesn't flow well, I think.
 * 10) **Altered. Havac 03:25, 27 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 11) * "He did not truly care about others—not strangers, not his parents. He barely cared about himself. He lived for the kill." - Bit flowery.
 * 12) **Deflowered . . . wait. Havac 03:25, 27 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 13) ***Quite. Thefourdotelipsis 10:29, 27 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 14) * You seem to have quite a few instances where you say "and" twice in quick succession, which doesn't read well. You should probably reword these sentences.
 * 15) **Ands significantly diminished. Havac 03:25, 27 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 16) *More later. Thefourdotelipsis 01:58, 27 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 17) More
 * 18) * I think you got most of them, but I found another: "Solo and his companions Hasti Troujow and Alexsandr Badure were suspicious, but agreed."
 * 19) **Varied. Havac 20:14, 27 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 20) *Otherwise, excellent. Thefourdotelipsis 10:29, 27 April 2009 (UTC)

CC-1004

 * Nominated by: Lord Hydronium 11:26, 11 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: Four months, one hiatus, and an hour of watching poorly-filmed German Jedi Alliance videos. This is what I have to show for it.

(3 Inqs/1 Users/4 Total)
Support
 * 1) CC7567  [ http://images1.wikia.nocookie.net/starwars/images/thumb/5/5f/Rex.png/20px-Rex.png] (s)talk 22:26, 11 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 2) Thefourdotelipsis 03:17, 22 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 3)  Cavalier One FarStar Logo.jpg( Squadron channel ) 11:53, 24 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 4) Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 23:24, 28 April 2009 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) A look from a clone (...at another clone...sheesh.)
 * 2) * "Gree" is mentioned twice in the first paragraph of the intro, and yet the second mention is the one that's bolded. Because it isn't bolded, he first mention makes it briefly sound like you're talking about an entirely different person, before it's clarified later.
 * 3) **Gah, that's an artifact of moving the bolded Gree to the end. Fixed.
 * 4) * Can quotes be found for the body?
 * 5) **Eh...I didn't remember any particularly exciting ones from TCW or ROTS besides the lead—most of the dialogue is pretty situational—so I just gave it the required one. If you have any good ones, though, feel free to add them.
 * 6) ***Added quotes for multiple sections. Not sure if some of them fit, though; you can arrange them if you want to.
 * 7) ****Works for me. The Gunray one in the section before his actual capture is the only one I might be iffy on, but I'm sure it's been done before. - Lord Hydronium 01:55, 12 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 8) * Why exactly was Gunray to be taken to Coruscant?
 * 9) **Explained (and fixed in the intro).
 * 10) * Even though it's quite obvious that Argyus was a traitor, you might want to mention it directly.
 * 11) **Addeded.
 * 12) * "Argyus got a kick on the commander": language is rather confusing.
 * 13) **Me no speak the Englishes good. Fixed.
 * 14) * "Argyus soon received a signal by comlink, from a now-outmatched Ventress, and turned on his fellow commandos, shooting them to death." It sounds a bit like the commandos required more than one shot to be killed.
 * 15) **Rejiggered.
 * 16) * You might want to consider moving the reference on which two Jedi accompanied Gree in Jedi Alliance to the Bts, because it's more of a footnote, and the reader is more likely to see it if it's in the Bts.
 * 17) **I actually originally had it in the BTS, but decided to move it; it's quite specific to that particular paragraph, so I thought it best if the explanation was linked to right there rather than placed among the rest of the general comments in the BTS. For what it's worth, footnotes on specific continuity notes do have a lot of precedent. - Lord Hydronium 21:57, 11 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 18) ***Understood. &mdash; CC7567 [ http://images1.wikia.nocookie.net/starwars/images/thumb/5/5f/Rex.png/20px-Rex.png] (s)talk 22:26, 11 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 19) *The article is looking great. &mdash; CC7567 [ http://images1.wikia.nocookie.net/starwars/images/thumb/5/5f/Rex.png/20px-Rex.png] (s)talk 21:25, 11 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 20) From the Moffship of Grand Moff Tranner:
 * 21) * I think the GAR (at least) should be listed in the infobox as an affiliation.
 * 22) **I have no problem one way or the other on this, I'm just not sure this is what we generally do. You can keep for now or strike the objection, but if anyone knows whether we have a consensus on how deep we go on affiliations, I'd like to know.
 * 23) ***I think this should be brought up in a CT some time in the future, but for now, it's no big deal. Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 23:24, 28 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 24) * "Gree was killed by Yoda attempting to fulfill the order." - almost sounds like Yoda was following Order 66. Please reword.
 * 25) **Reworded.
 * 26) * A little more context on Amidala's capture on Rodia is needed, I think.
 * 27) **Discussed in IRC.
 * 28) * Are you positive that the Prima guide for Star Wars: The Clone Wars: Jedi Alliance was referring to Gree when they mentioned a "Kree?"
 * 29) **Yeah, it's referring to Gree's parts in the game, I'm told. - Lord Hydronium 23:22, 28 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 30) *Well done. Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 23:04, 28 April 2009 (UTC)

Comments

Imperial Sentinel

 * Nominated by: Xicer9 Atgar.svg( Rawr) 02:40, 12 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: My first FA nom.

(2 Inqs/1 Users/3 Total)
Support
 * 1) Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 23:15, 14 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 2) Jinzler 20:49, 15 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 3) Thefourdotelipsis 22:03, 28 April 2009 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) Jinzler
 * 2) * In Dark Empire II, an Imperial Sentinel is present when Sedriss returns returns to Byss after the Battle of Balmorra. You should mention this --Jinzler 13:39, 12 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 3) **Missed that one, thanks. It's been mentioned. Xicer9 Atgar.svg( Rawr) 15:34, 14 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 4) From the Moffship of Grand Moff Tranner:
 * 5) * Dark Side Adepts should be listed as an affiliation in the infobox.
 * 6) **Done.
 * 7) * The Emperor's Imperial Sentinels could probably use a mention, even if it's in the BTS.
 * 8) **Mentioned.
 * 9) * Context on Leia and Han in the intro/history.
 * 10) **Added.
 * 11) ***I don't see any. Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 19:33, 14 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 12) ****Should be there now.
 * 13) ***** I hate to say this, but while the context is there, I'm seeing an overuse of &mdash 's, specifically in the history. A few need to be replaced with commas, I think. Would you mind if I go through the article, doing so? Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 20:40, 14 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 14) ******I've replaced many of them, but feel free to look through the article and change any others.
 * 15) *******Looks good. Sorry I'm such a pain. :p Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 23:15, 14 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 16) * I think it's pretty safe to say that the dissolution occurred when Byss was destroyed, given the fact that the Sentinels were created on Byss.
 * 17) **I originally wasn't going to put this in for fear of it being tagged as speculation, but it's been added now.
 * 18) * "Though apparently lacking Force-sensitivity, Sentinels were altered through the use of Sith Alchemy and shared a mental link with Adepts, suggesting that they were a form of Sithspawn." - does the relevant source suggest that they were a form of Sithspawn, or is that your own conclusion?
 * 19) **The DE Sourcebook gave a description of the Sentinels that pretty accurately matched the description given on the Sithspawn page. I removed the sentence though.
 * 20) * The article for The Creation of Monsters suggests the creation of the Sentinels was present in the book. Is this true?
 * 21) **I can't seem to find it in any of the sources so I'm willing to be it's just speculation.
 * 22) *Nice job. Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 14:40, 12 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 23) **Thanks. :) Xicer9 Atgar.svg( Rawr) 15:34, 14 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 24) If the sentinels aren't in Empire's End, how can you definitively source their total destruction to that source? Thefourdotelipsis 23:20, 27 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 25) *While they don't appear in the comic their cloning facilities were located on Byss and since they remained on Byss unless led off-world by a Dark Side Adept most if not all of them would have been on Byss when it blew up. I originally wasn't going to put this in the article but I mainly did so to address an earlier objection. Perhaps I should put a note in the Bts section concerning this issue. Xicer9 Atgar.svg( Combadge) 00:02, 28 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 26) **What you can do is say without saying it. Just remind people of their facilities and themselves being mostly on Byss, then say it was destroyed. It's always possible, if not necessarily probable, they they somehow survived, so saying directly that they were destroyed is speculative; however, if you only say as much as the canon, you can let people draw whatever conclusions they would from the canon itself without speculating in the article. - Lord Hydronium 00:07, 28 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 27) ***Thanks for the suggestion, I've reworded the those sections a bit to make it more ambiguous. I also removed the dissolution date since that would just confirm the total annihilation of the Sentinels. Xicer9 Atgar.svg( Combadge) 00:53, 28 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 28) Chack Attack:
 * 29) *Context on Sovereign Protectors.
 * 30) **Added.
 * 31) *I'd like to see you mention what planet Boda was one when he was arrested. My first thought was that it was Coruscant, but obviously that can't be it since they took him there.
 * 32) **The Dark Empire Sourcebook doesn't specify on what planet the arrest took place. It simply says The first Sentinels appeared, typically, without any explanation, at the scene of a battle where a few Jedi had been captured. It then continues to give information on Boda's arrest and his subsequent execution. I've reworded the paragraph a little to make it a bit clearer.
 * 33) *Otherwise, very good job. Enjoyable read.  Chack Jadson  (Talk) 01:03, 28 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 34) **Thanks for the review! Xicer9 Atgar.svg( Combadge) 01:38, 28 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 35) "If the process was unsuccessful, the monstrosities were simply disposed of." Monstrosities seems a little POV. Green Tentacle (Talk) 20:01, 30 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 36) *Reworded. Xicer9 [[Image:atgar.svg|20px]]( Combadge) 22:40, 30 April 2009 (UTC)

Comments

Guardian (Executor-class)

 * Nominated by: Lord Hydronium 02:15, 14 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: I hope you like infoboxes.

(3 Inqs/1 Users/4 Total)
Support
 * 1) Interesting read, well done. Xicer9 Atgar.svg( Rawr) 02:26, 15 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 2) Not bad, nice subject matter.  Graestan ( Talk ) 20:03, 22 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 3) Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 20:06, 22 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 4) Thefourdotelipsis 23:17, 28 April 2009 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) Xicer9
 * 2) * Opening quote doesn't have a source. Other than that, looks great. Xicer9 Atgar.svg( Rawr) 13:36, 14 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 3) **Well, that was silly. Fixed. - Lord Hydronium 00:23, 15 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 4) * A couple more things actually. This sentence from the intro: Drommel took the Guardian to the region of homeworld of Oplovis, where he became a warlord. I think you're missing a word in there somewhere.
 * 5) **Yar. Fixed.
 * 6) * Also from the intro: Drommel fled into hyperspace, but due to the damage sustained on the vessel's hyperdrive, the Guardian emerged in the Fardon system rather than its intended destination. What was its intended destination? The history section doesn't clarify this either. Xicer9 Atgar.svg( Rawr) 00:52, 15 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 7) **Doesn't say, just that he didn't mean to leap to Fardon. - Lord Hydronium 01:58, 15 April 2009 (UTC)

Comments
 * If it can be scanned, there's one more image of the ship coming. - Lord Hydronium 02:15, 14 April 2009 (UTC)

Yeeru Chivkyrie

 * Nominated by:  Pranay Sobusk  ~  Talk  09:06, 16 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: About 1,080 words

(3 Inqs/0 Users/3 Total)
Support
 * 1) Not terribly exciting, but good for a small character.  —Xwing328 (Talk) 18:46, 26 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 2) Thefourdotelipsis 23:53, 29 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 3) Pending correction of GT's objections.  Atarumaster88  [[Image:Jedi_Order.svg|20px]] ( Talk page ) 19:44, 30 April 2009 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) From the Chron-O-John of Green Tentacle:
 * 2) *Mention Slanni and Vokkoli going to Shelkonwa with him and Leia. They're mentioned during his earlier meeting with them and then that they left the planet but you don't establish them being there in the first place. It's been a while since I read it, but was there a meeting between them all (including Leia) aboard his ship before they went to the planet?
 * 3) *He decided to find a job for Leia, but you don't say whether she took it.
 * 4) *Where were they when they saw the housebreakers?
 * 5) *"Organa also saw an Adarian child." Where was the child?
 * 6) *"The Rebel leader's plan was to snap a pipe by shooting at its mountings." What pipe?
 * 7) *"Then, she intended to place the pipe's end on the other roof and slip down to confront the criminals." What other roof?
 * 8) *"After the first shots, Chivkyrie saw the housebreakers running away and Organa went back into the house." Her first shots at the pipe?
 * 9) *He hid in the catacombs but what did Leia do?
 * 10) *It mostly just needs a little bit more detail on his and Leia's time on Shelkonwa. There's lots happening but little detail on each bit. The above should do it. Otherwise, good article. Green Tentacle (Talk) 23:23, 26 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 11) From the desk of Atarumaster88
 * 12) * "was informed about Organa's whereabouts and started to search for her, Chivkyrie split up with her and hid in Shelkonwa's catacombs. " (Intro) Wording is kind of awkward.
 * 13) **Changed it. Take a look if it's better now.
 * 14) * Contextify his two comrades on first mention. Are they Adarian?
 * 15) **Addressed
 * 16) ***I added context to the main body also. Atarumaster88  [[Image:Jedi_Order.svg|20px]] ( Talk page ) 19:44, 30 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 17) *That's all. GT covered most of the rest. Have a Super Terrific Friendly Un-frustrating day. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 20:41, 29 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 18) **Thank you for the review, Ataru, and please let me know if anything else is needed.  Pranay Sobusk  ~  Talk  11:16, 30 April 2009 (UTC)

Comments When you nominate an article for Featured status, don't forget to add the template. -- Darth tom  <span title="(Imperial Intelligence)" style="color:Black">(Imperial Intelligence)  14:02, 21 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Many thanks to User:Master Jonathan for copyediting the article.  Pranay Sobusk  ~  Talk  09:06, 16 April 2009 (UTC)
 * I won't forget it next time. Thanks that you added the template for me, Darth tom.  Pranay Sobusk  ~  Talk  11:16, 30 April 2009 (UTC)

Empirical

 * Nominated by: Lord Hydronium 04:12, 18 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: Yay, more noms!

(0 Inqs/0 Users/0 Total)
Support

Object
 * Farl-objection:
 * What does ISS stand for? If the canon does not provide that information, that should be said under BtS (As far as I know, I'm not even sure whether it is a real acronym or not). --Skippy Farlstendoiro 07:48, 23 April 2009 (UTC)
 * We don't know, no. You want to say "we don't know what it means" in the BTS, though? That seems a little pointless. - Lord Hydronium 19:51, 23 April 2009 (UTC)
 * That's exactly what I suggested. --Skippy Farlstendoiro 10:26, 24 April 2009 (UTC)

Comments

Dulok

 * Nominated by: ~ SavageBob 01:34, 21 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: We are the Du-Du-Du-Du-Duloks, and we're one big grumpy family.

(1 Inqs/0 Users/1 Total)
Support Object
 * 1) One of the best articles I have read for some time! Well done. --Eyrezer 08:42, 22 April 2009 (UTC)

Comments
 * I know you can have up to three redlinks but, could you pretty please take care of glock and trap? Simply stub them. --Skippy Farlstendoiro 06:55, 21 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Will do. If anyone has the DVD Tales from the Endor Woods (or the other side, whichever has Rampage of the Phlogs on it), it would be nice to know whether "glock" is the correct spelling or not (via the closed-captioning), though! ~ SavageBob 22:06, 22 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Done. I believe earring is a redlink now, though, alas. ~ SavageBob 01:29, 25 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Is there any Galaxies quests relating to the Duloks? If so they should be included in the body of the article. --Eyrezer 10:45, 21 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Thanks! I think you get a badge for visiting their village, but I'll check again. ~ SavageBob 22:06, 22 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Ah, ok. So the Duloks are just random adversaries then? --Eyrezer 22:51, 22 April 2009 (UTC)
 * I'm pretty sure this is the case. I've added a bit about the badge. ~ SavageBob 01:29, 25 April 2009 (UTC)

Zaalbar

 * Nominated by: -- Darth tom Imperial Emblem.svg <span title="(Imperial Intelligence)" style="color:Black">(Imperial Intelligence)  18:47, 21 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: GROOOOARGH

(0 Inqs/1 Users/1 Total)
Support
 * 1) One of my favourite party members. QuiGonJinn There's always a bigger fish. 17:12, 24 April 2009 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) Couple of things I noticed after a quick scan:
 * 2) *Early bio doesn't establish a timeframe.
 * 3) *First paragraph of "Revan" section could be altered to be more from Zaalbar's POV as opposed to Revan's, and some of the extraneous info could be cut out. Also, "Zaalbar found Zaalbar scaring off..." :-P
 * 4) *Speculation at the end of the bio.
 * 5) *BtS needs expansion. There's concept art there, so his conception should be mentioned, as should where he appeared. "An alternate dark side choice" means nothing to someone who's not familiar with the game.
 * 6) **-- AdmirableAckbar (Talk) 22:26, 21 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 7) Some other things from QuiGon
 * 8) * Context on Revan in the intro.
 * 9) * With one of the Star Maps being located on Zaalbar's homeworld of Kashyyyk, Zaalbar returned to his homeworld with Revan. Could one "homeworld" be changed to something else?
 * 10) * Early life. ...came under the attention span of numerous slaving organizations across the galaxy, such as the galaxy spanning wide organization Czerka Corporation. Same here with "spans"
 * 11) * After discovering that his brother, Chuundar, was making deals with slavers to sell Wookiees to them, Zaalbar went mad with rage and attacked his brother. And again. "His brother" is used twice in the same sentence.
 * 12) * "Charging one of the Black Vulkars, one of them knocked Mission down, by striking her". Awkward.
 * 13) **Nevermind, I rephrased it myself. QuiGonJinn There's always a bigger fish. 09:33, 23 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 14) * "After that, the pair became inseparable from one another". What pair? The previous sentence was about the Vulcars.
 * 15) * Beware of colloquial language like the short forms "who’d" and "hadn't". They are unencyclopedic and should be changed to full forms "who would" and "had not"
 * 16) * "abilities to break open locks, as taught to her by her brother Grif, were able to assist Zaalbar". Abilities were able to assist? This needs some rephrasing.
 * 17) * The GameLS should be used in the article, methinks.
 * 18) * Several articles are not linked in the main body. These include Carth, Bastila, etc. Each article should linked once in the intro and once in the main body.
 * 19) * Zaalbar was a dedicated warrior and fighter, able to wield a number of weapons including melee weapons, such as vibroblades, to the weapon of the Bowcaster, well favored by Wookiee’s, Zaalbar owning his own Bowcaster The last part reads really awkwardly. I suggest splitting the sentence.
 * 20) * Talents and abilities. "Bacca's Ceremonial Blade, given to him by his father, Wookiee chieftain Freyyr". You've already stated at least twice in the bio that Freyyr was his father. And while it reads okay there, it seems unnecessary in this section.
 * 21) * You mention his usage of vibroblades and the bowcaster twice in this section.
 * 22) * "Zaalbar's strength was also evident from his ability to easily pick up foes, as he did with those who were attacking him when he first met Mission and on Tattooine, where he was able to pick up Tusken Raiders" I suggest rephrasing this as well.
 * 23) * "Zaalbar is similar to Chewbacca from four of the "Star Wars" films. Like Chewbacca, he is Wookiee royalty and has sworn a life debt to a Human." I think these films should be listed instead of the current KotoR ref. As does the source that states that Chewbacca was royalty.
 * 24) *Other than that, and a few other minor things I've corrected, the article looks fine. QuiGonJinn There's always a bigger fish. 17:15, 22 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 25) **Alright, done but for the BtS part, which I'm working on. -- Darth tom Imperial Emblem.svg <span title="(Imperial Intelligence)" style="color:Black">(Imperial Intelligence)  19:31, 22 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 26) *Acky's complaints have been addressed, as we discussed via the IRC. QuiGonn, the uncrossed objections: the contractions aren't there, and the Chewbacca point isn't there either. :) -- Darth tom Imperial Emblem.svg <span title="(Imperial Intelligence)" style="color:Black">(Imperial Intelligence)  16:45, 24 April 2009 (UTC)

Comments
 * Leaving my vote until feedback, as always. -- Darth tom Imperial Emblem.svg <span title="(Imperial Intelligence)" style="color:Black">(Imperial Intelligence)  18:47, 21 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Self-votes aren't allowed, at any rate. -- AdmirableAckbar (Talk) 22:26, 21 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Ah, that's true. -- Darth tom Imperial Emblem.svg <span title="(Imperial Intelligence)" style="color:Black">(Imperial Intelligence)  19:31, 22 April 2009 (UTC)

Emperor's Retreat

 * Nominated by: Lord Hydronium 21:17, 21 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: Surprisingly painless for an all-Galaxies article.

(3 Inqs/3 Users/6 Total)
Support
 * 1) --Eyrezer 09:34, 22 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 2) QuiGonJinn There's always a bigger fish. 12:54, 23 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 3) Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 20:02, 23 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 4) Very good work, Hydro. -- Darth tom Imperial Emblem.svg <span title="(Imperial Intelligence)" style="color:Black">(Imperial Intelligence)  20:16, 26 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 5) I want to live there --Jinzler 22:11, 27 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 6)  Chack Jadson  (Talk)  00:13, 30 April 2009 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) * Veers had the mastermind of the attacks, a Twi'lek named Borvo, killed - You might have made a mistake here, as Borvo was a Hutt --Jinzler 14:04, 22 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 2) **I'll admit from the top that I haven't actually played Galaxies, and I got all this information off a site about it. From what I can tell, Borvo the Twi'lek is a guy pretending to be Borvo the Hutt. - Lord Hydronium 18:33, 22 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 3) ***I've changed the link to the other Borvo. - Lord Hydronium 19:23, 22 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 4) When Galaxies started, its in-universe date was 1.5 ABY; with each recent expansion this has been upped, and 2 ABY is the date of the more recent quests. Could you please provide a source for this statement? I haven't heard of any "upping".  QuiGonJinn There's always a bigger fish. 16:33, 22 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 5) *I was told this by a player, but I can't actually find any source for it, so I've removed all those references for now. - Lord Hydronium 19:23, 22 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 6) From the Moffship of Grand Moff Tranner:
 * 7) * Any reason you don't mention Dolmen's name in the intro?
 * 8) **Yeah, it was a redlink at the time. :P I don't think dropping his name in there flows that well, but I've pipelinked it to him.
 * 9) * "Palpatine suspected Kylantha was harboring a Rebel general, and eventually he was located and killed." - are there no details to this event? And I feel that the general should actually be named in the article rather than linking "he" to his article. Also, was Kylantha harboring him, and if so, what happened to her? Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 11:21, 23 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 10) **There are details, but except for Palpatine handing out the assignment, it all takes place away from the retreat. I changed some stuff around, though. - Lord Hydronium 19:49, 23 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 11) ***So nothing happened to Kylantha? Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 19:52, 23 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 12) ****Well, she still hangs around as an NPC in Galaxies. Who knows what "actually" happens after the Galaxies timeframe ends. - Lord Hydronium 20:00, 23 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 13) *****Fair enough. Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 20:02, 23 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 14) * Have you checked any of the SWG prima game guides, to see if it is mentioned in any of them? --Jinzler 22:15, 23 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 15) **Added to the sources. No info in them. - Lord Hydronium 00:56, 24 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 16) * Can you check Who's Who in Star Wars Galaxies, to see if it is mentioned there? --Jinzler 07:23, 25 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 17) **Source and information added. - Lord Hydronium 00:25, 26 April 2009 (UTC)

Comments

Daeshara'cor

 * Nominated by: -- —Harrar  MR T.Lah.jpg ( Villip ) 21:37, 22 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: What with the Triage process bringing FANs down to a record low, I figured ole Daeshara wouldn't cause too much of a stir.

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Support

Object
 * IMHO: The quote opening "Death over Ithor" should specify who says each line. I had to look for a name, reach line 7, assume that the name Anakin is a vocative so it must have been said by the other party, and then re-read the quote to see who says the first line. Btw: Great article! -Skippy Farlstendoiro 10:25, 24 April 2009 (UTC)
 * I removed the top lines because a) I felt the quote was a bit too long and cumbersome b) It would have really suffered to have had Daeshara'cor and Anakin Solo in front of every line. I do agree that it was vague, however, so I strimmed it down so the first line is Daeshara'cor saying "Anakin" so it's more obvious. Is this okay? -- —Harrar  MR T.Lah.jpg ( Villip ) 08:52, 25 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Perfect, thanks. --Skippy Farlstendoiro 11:33, 26 April 2009 (UTC)

Comments
 * I tried new things &mdash; but if my short paragraphs are too short though then let me know. -- —Harrar  MR T.Lah.jpg ( Villip ) 21:37, 22 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Also, despite the fact that Ruin makes it clear that Daeshara does not quite fall to the dark side, the reference guides claim she does, and therefore I left her in the Fallen Jedi and Redeemed Jedi category despite the blatant contradictions. -- —Harrar  MR T.Lah.jpg ( Villip ) 21:42, 22 April 2009 (UTC)

Nuvo Vindi

 * Nominated by: Darth Trayus Sith_Emblem.svg ( Trayus Academy )
 * Nomination comments:Fresh outta the GA oven.

(0 Inqs/1 Users/1 Total)
Support
 * 1) I support odd (and insane) scientists.  CC7567  (talk) 03:54, 24 April 2009 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) A few things that I should have caught while it was on the GAN page:
 * 2) * Can it be mentioned in the intro that the virus had no known cure?
 * 3) **Absolutly.
 * 4) ***Although saying the virus was a "deadly water-borne plague with no known cure, known to cause instantaneous death" is rather redundant. The second one can be changed (back) to "it resulted in".  CC7567  (talk) 02:14, 24 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 5) ****K reworked that part. Better?
 * 6) *****Yup.  CC7567  (talk) 03:54, 24 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 7) * Can it be mentioned that Amidala and Binks arrived in Theed, rather than later when the Jedi arrived?
 * 8) **Yup.
 * 9) ***I added "of Naboo", just to clarify.  CC7567  (talk) 02:14, 24 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 10) * If it is stated as "members of the 501st Legion", it should probably have context. Otherwise, the clone troopers can just be mentioned there.
 * 11) **Contextificated.
 * 12) * "combat the enemies": a little awkward. Possibly try to substitute "enemies" for something else; the Confederacy and Republic were officially enemies, but Vindi hadn't yet actually met the Jedi, so it seems a little strange that they can hold so much tension against each other before even officially meeting.
 * 13) **replaced with "intruders"
 * 14) * When Vindi attempts to escape, it can be said that Kenobi was the one that was forced to halt his approach and prevent the vials from breaking.
 * 15) **Kenobified.
 * 16) * The shuttle can be mentioned earlier.
 * 17) **Sheathipeded.
 * 18) * Can it be mentioned earlier that Vindi was a scientist, rather than all the way down in the Bts?
 * 19) **It's in the intro twice and he's refered to as doctor and "former senior medic" right in the beginning of the body. More? Or is this bueno?
 * 20) ***Actually, yeah, that's fine.  CC7567  (talk) 02:14, 24 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 21) *Yay for mad scientists. (And ones appearing in The Clone Wars, too.)  CC7567  (talk) 05:11, 23 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 22) **Yay for mental instability! Darth Trayus  Sith_Emblem.svg ( Trayus Academy ) 01:33, 24 April 2009 (UTC)

Comments
 * Part of WookieeProject: The Clone Wars

Hosk Trey'lis

 * Nominated by:  Grunny  ( Talk ) 13:40, 23 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: Back to Legacy

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Support

Object
 * 1) Yep.
 * 2) *Context on Jedi.
 * 3) *Context on the One Sith and Fel Empire.
 * 4) *Context on Galactic Alliance.
 * 5) **For all three of these things context is unneeded. We only provide context for things that reader won't necessarily know. We never have to provide context for Jedi or Sith as they are implied knowledge from movie canon. One Sith is clearly a Sith order so context would just disrupt flow. Fel Empire and Galactic Alliance are both self-contextualizing as governments by their very nature. :-)  Grunny  ( Talk ) 02:59, 24 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 6) ***I agree with you on all of that except for One Sith. It should be mentioned somewhere that it's a new organization of Sith revealed during the Sith-Imperial War. Or something. Not necessarily in the intro, but somwhere. Darth Trayus  Sith_Emblem.svg ( Trayus Academy ) 04:04, 24 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 7) ****Done :-).  Grunny  ( Talk ) 08:39, 24 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 8) *That's all I saw. Good work, Grunny. -- Darth tom Imperial Emblem.svg <span title="(Imperial Intelligence)" style="color:Black">(Imperial Intelligence)  19:03, 23 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 9) From the Moffship of Grand Moff Tranner:
 * 10) *"After having a vision of the Bothan, Skywalker traveled to Coruscant to rescue Trey'lis only to get captured himself. A week later, having received Sith training, Skywalker attempted another rescue, however, was once again captured." - You need to mention, if only briefly, why Skywalker trained as a Sith.
 * 11) *"For a week after Skywalker's failed rescue attempt, Trey'lis was held in the laboratory while Skywalker was trained as a Sith." - Same as above. He did train willingly, right?
 * 12) *"...and Skywalker escaping through a hole blasted in the wall by his mother, Nyna Calixte, who had arrived to rescue him." - Some context is needed here; specifically, a mention of the plan to rescue Cade.
 * 13) *Well done, as always. Grand Moff Tranner [[Image:Imperial Department of Military Research.svg|20px]] (Comlink) 17:26, 30 April 2009 (UTC)

Comments

Mungo Baobab

 * Nominated by: Green Tentacle (Talk) 23:10, 23 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: But she told me she was eighteen!

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Comments

Breth Gart

 * Nominated by: Green Tentacle (Talk) 21:34, 25 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: Not to be confused with Bret Hart.

(1 Inqs/0 Users/1 Total)
Support
 * 1)  Grunny  ( Talk ) 11:08, 26 April 2009 (UTC)

Object

Comments

Battle of Christophsis

 * Nominated by:  CC7567  (talk) 06:33, 26 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: Sorry for the continued uber-long battle noms. :P  CC7567  (talk) 06:33, 26 April 2009 (UTC)

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Object

Comments
 * TCW's first "official" nom after the duel was merged into the battle.  CC7567  (talk) 06:33, 26 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Nevermind; it's the second one, since Trayus nominated Nuvo Vindi. :P  CC7567  (talk) 06:35, 26 April 2009 (UTC)

Ackmena

 * Nominated by: Thefourdotelipsis 08:37, 26 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: And then there's Ackmena. RIP, Beatrice Arthur. Femputer. Golden Girl. Space bartender.

(3 Inqs/5 Users/8 Total)
Support
 * 1) I gave it an in-depth skimming but overall I'm voting in memory of Ms. Arthur. RestInPeace. Darth Trayus  Sith_Emblem.svg ( Trayus Academy ) 10:03, 26 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 2) Great article; RIP Ms. Arthur.  CC7567  (talk) 17:28, 26 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 3) Come back soon, I'll be waiting! Green Tentacle (Talk) 22:46, 26 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 4) Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 23:22, 26 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 5) She knows how it feels to be a fembot living in a manbot's manputer's world. -  Cavalier One FarStar Logo.jpg( Squadron channel ) 10:53, 27 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 6)  &mdash;Lucius malfoy7  Nute777.png ( Give it up for Lil' 'Soka Tano, ladies and gents! ) 01:22, 28 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 7) R.I.P. Bea Arthur. Master JonathanJedi Council Chambers 01:26, 28 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 8) A great article. Humorous and amorous. Dark Father 11:31, 29 April 2009 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) Somebody's gotta object:
 * 2) * "based on the life of Alliance war hero, Luke Skywalker.": Specify which Alliance.
 * 3) **Specified.
 * 4) * "due to subversive activities, a curfew was to be placed on the Tatooine system": What kind of "subversive activities"?
 * 5) **Not specified in the source. Thefourdotelipsis 01:22, 28 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 6) * "They eventually formed their own troupe,": Does this troupe have an article? If so, it should be linked; if not then a redlink might be warranted.
 * 7) **Redlinked.
 * 8) * "Their production inspired Myhr Rho, a regular, to start up a tour of Tatooine [&hellip;]" A regular of what?
 * 9) **Specified.
 * 10) * "In addition to her other skills, Ackmena was considered a expert in mixology.": A bit of explanation as to what is meant by "mixology" needs to be added.
 * 11) **Tweaked.
 * 12) *Otherwise very good. Master JonathanJedi Council Chambers 00:06, 28 April 2009 (UTC)
 * 13) **Thanks for the review. Thefourdotelipsis 01:22, 28 April 2009 (UTC)

Comments
 * 1) I see that there are only two images. If you have CSWE, there's a fair Ackmena pic next to her entry.  &mdash;Lucius malfoy7  Nute777.png ( Give it up for Lil' 'Soka Tano, ladies and gents! ) 01:22, 28 April 2009 (UTC)

Banjeer

 * Nominated by: Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 19:28, 28 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: Fresh from the GA nominations page; get it while it's hot.

(0 Inqs/1 Users/1 Total)
Support
 * 1) Shouldn't have had to be GAed first anyway. :P  CC7567  (talk) 19:30, 28 April 2009 (UTC)

Object

Comments

Ugor

 * Nominated by: ~ SavageBob 02:02, 29 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: Greetings in the name of the Great Brophet Botib (may his membrane squish with zealous wrath for eternity!). It has come to our attention that your humbly insignificant little holosite has granted "Featured Articleness" to a biece of unabashed psychological warfare about the pseudobodia of the Anti-Brophet and Most Abominable Enemies to the System of Baradise and its sanctified denizens, the Ugors. After much debate in a joint session of the Holy Ugorian Fleet and the Sacred Office of Brobaganda and Fundraising, we hab decided not to turn our mighty dreadnoughts on your serbers. Instead, blease find our resbonse to said brebious biece of doggerel about said demonic agents. May the Beace of the Redeeming Cytoblasm of the Angel of Taxations and Imborts wash ober you. BulbSav, High Chablain of Incomes, Wages, and Tax Brackets, Most Holy Office of Intrasystem Rebenue and Beatitudes

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Comments

Redemption

 * Nominated by: Green Tentacle (Talk) 20:29, 29 April 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: They're heading for the Medical Frigate!

(1 Inqs/0 Users/1 Total)
Support
 * 1) Very nice. ESB = Gold. Toprawa and Ralltiir 20:48, 30 April 2009 (UTC)

Object

Comments
 * Didn't want to post this as an objection, but I think the intro could be expanded, seeing that there's plenty of information on the ship. Grand Moff Tranner [[Image:Imperial Department of Military Research.svg|20px]] (Comlink) 22:32, 30 April 2009 (UTC)