Wookieepedia:Good article nominations/Battle of Rishi


 * ''The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a good article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Battle of Rishi

 * Nominated by: QuiGonJinn  Senate seal.svg(Talk) 21:14, 1 August 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: The TCW comic battle wave continues...

(3 ACs/2 Users/5 Total)
Support
 * 1)  JangFett  Talk 17:23, 3 August 2009 (UTC)
 * 2) SoresuMakashi ( Everything I tell you is a lie  the truth  ) 11:51, 4 August 2009 (UTC)
 * 3) You do a nice writing job, QuiGon, and now that you're starting to become more of an article-writing veteran, I want to see you pay closer attention to spelling typos and linking/HTML accuracy. My copy-edit will give you a better understanding for what I refer to. Toprawa and Ralltiir 21:02, 10 August 2009 (UTC)
 * 4)  Grunny  ( Talk ) 10:06, 11 August 2009 (UTC)
 * 5) Haven't read the comic itself, but the article looks good. Keep it up. Kreivi Wolter 13:28, 11 August 2009 (UTC)
 * 6)  CC7567  (talk) 04:19, 17 August 2009 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) Fett gets back into TCW territory
 * 2) * In the intro and body, context on Green Company.
 * 3) **Is this really necessary? I think it's pretty obvious that Green Company is a military unit, and I can't really think of another context for it. CC doesn't contextualize Green Company, for example :P
 * 4) ***haha, all right. Thanks for pointing that out :P
 * 5) * "After Cooker had informed Fisto that he would have no line of sight with the enemy from that position, the Jedi Master finally revealed his plan to the clone; Cooker was supposed to aim for Fisto's shoulder and fire continuously." Correct me if I'm wrong, but the way this sentence is set up sounds like Cooker wants to shoot Fisto's shoulder. Clarification is needed, was this Fisto's plan?
 * 6) **Hopefully clarified.
 * 7) * "At that moment, Fisto was contacted by Cooker, who asked the Jedi to stay down and shot at the cannon, destroying it." Quite confusing. Cooker asked the Jedi to stay down and shot at the cannon, destroying it?
 * 8) **Split into two sentences to make less confusing.
 * 9) * "The Republic forces, along with some of the Rishii warriors then arrived and attacked the mines, forcing the remaining Geonosians to flee." Quite confusing. Should be, "The Republic forces, along with the help of Rishii warriors, that arrived, attacked the mines.." or something like that.
 * 10) **With the help of almighty em dashes, this should be fixed :P
 * 11) ***Much better :)
 * 12) *Overall, good work Qui-Gon.  JangFett  Talk 17:16, 2 August 2009 (UTC)
 * 13) **Thanks. QuiGonJinn  Senate seal.svg(Talk) 17:19, 3 August 2009 (UTC)
 * 14) Soresu
 * 15) * Context on Green Company in the body. SoresuMakashi ( Everything I tell you is a lie  the truth  ) 11:22, 4 August 2009 (UTC)
 * 16) **Again, I don't think it is necessary. See above. QuiGonJinn  Senate seal.svg(Talk) 11:31, 4 August 2009 (UTC)
 * 17) ***It's okay, I guess. Hwever, note how CC uses "the troopers" or "the clone troopers of Green Company", which is, in fact, context in a subtle way. You link it in the next sentence, which is fine I suppose, just a little less clear. SoresuMakashi ( Everything I tell you is a lie  the truth  ) 11:51, 4 August 2009 (UTC)

Comments


 * Again, there's not enough information for an "Aftermath" section. QuiGonJinn  Senate seal.svg(Talk) 21:14, 1 August 2009 (UTC)