Wookieepedia:Comprehensive article nominations/Mother Queen


 * ''The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a comprehensive article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Mother Queen

 * Nominated by:  OLIOSTER  (talk) 23:44, November 10, 2010 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: None

(1 ECs/3 Users/4 Total)
Support
 * 1)  1358  (Talk) 16:31, November 11, 2010 (UTC)
 * 2)  MasterFred Commerce Guild.svg(Whatever) 03:45, November 13, 2010 (UTC)
 * 3)  Holocron Greatholocron.jpg (Complain) 09:31, November 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * 4) Menkooroo 01:57, November 17, 2010 (UTC)

Object Comments
 * Are there any more details about the mother queen you can give? Is it bigger than a typical urnsor'is? Does it have any special defenses it uses against the player during the fight?
 * Only that she is surrounded by guardians and juvenile urnsor'is. I'll add this.  OLIOSTER  (talk) 16:32, November 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * I feel like the bit about it having a healing salve should be told in the context of the Mother Queen, not in the context of the guy who desires it. What I mean is, the article currently reads like it's about the player's quest rather than about the mother queen. I think it would be better to start off the article with everything that's known about the Mother Queen (it's big, it's the source of the infestation, it has a special healing salve inside of it), and only after that's finished, talk about the people who want it dead. Currently, there's only one real sentence about the mother queen, and the rest of the article reads like a mission article about the quest to defeat it.
 * Moved what little information is known about her to the front of the paragraph before any mention of the Myyydril members.  OLIOSTER  (talk) 16:32, November 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * Following from that, are the last two sentences really relevant to the Mother Queen? They read like they're the "aftermath" of a mission article. Sorry to keep hammering that point home. Menkooroo 09:52, November 15, 2010 (UTC)
 * Should I just remove this part completely or just shorten it? Like "Kallaarac and Yraka rewarded the spacer for their efforts." ?
 * I think shortening it would be OK. Good work! :^) Menkooroo 01:53, November 16, 2010 (UTC)
 * Done, and thanks :).  OLIOSTER  (talk) 02:57, November 16, 2010 (UTC)
 * If anyone knows of any other categories this article could belong in, please don't hesitate to note them, or even add them yourself.  OLIOSTER  (talk) 23:47, November 10, 2010 (UTC)