Wookieepedia:Featured article nominations/Steadfast (Ardent-class)


 * ''The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a featured article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.

Steadfast (Ardent-class)

 * Nominated by:  Grunny  ( Talk ) 05:00, 11 June 2009 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: 1,229 words as of nomination

(5 Inqs/1 Users/6 Total/INQCON 5)
Support
 * 1)  CC7567  (talk) 05:40, 11 June 2009 (UTC)
 * 2) Well done. Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 15:55, 11 June 2009 (UTC)
 * 3)  Cavalier One FarStar Logo.jpg( Squadron channel ) 10:42, 12 June 2009 (UTC)
 * 4) Toprawa and Ralltiir 16:34, 16 June 2009 (UTC)
 * 5) Green Tentacle (Talk) 18:39, 16 June 2009 (UTC)
 * 6) —Tommy9281  Dark side Master SWGTCG.jpg ( No quarter given, all exits sealed ) 00:12, 19 June 2009 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) From the Moffship of Grand Moff Tranner:
 * 2) * I noticed a few places where you use the term "Imperial admiral" or something similar. The "Imperial" part should be clarified, seeing as you could be referring to either Imperial admiral.
 * 3) **Confusion should now be avoided :).
 * 4) ***One last thing: "Now outnumbered and outgunned, Admiral Kelsan was contacted by his Imperial opponent, Admiral Edouard Fenel, commander of the Bastion Second Fleet."
 * 5) ****Reworded.  Grunny  ( Talk ) 15:54, 11 June 2009 (UTC)
 * 6) * Avenger just needs a bit more context.
 * 7) **Contextified.
 * 8) *Well done. Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 12:38, 11 June 2009 (UTC)
 * 9) **Thanks for the review, Tranner :-).  Grunny  ( Talk ) 13:39, 11 June 2009 (UTC)
 * 10) Toprawa:
 * 11) * I feel the paragraph beginning "Now outnumbered and outgunned" could be cut down significantly. The Steadfast is only mentioned briefly in passing in that whole chunk of text, which tells me that there is just too much peripheral detail here. Try to shorten that up and do what you can to rewrite things to focus on the Steadfast. Toprawa and Ralltiir 02:01, 16 June 2009 (UTC)
 * 12) **I have cut the paragraph down a bit and tried to keep the focus on the Steadfast. Let me know if more is needed :). Thanks for reviewing, Tope :-).  Grunny  ( Talk ) 12:36, 16 June 2009 (UTC)
 * 13) Blacklist:
 * 14) * The very first sentence of the intro is quite the run-on. I'd suggest either breaking it up or removing some.
 * 15) **I'd prefer not to, as I would lose context on the time period and grammatically it is not a run-on :).
 * 16) ***Guess I can't argue with that;) —Tommy9281 Dark side Master SWGTCG.jpg ( No quarter given, all exits sealed ) 00:12, 19 June 2009 (UTC)
 * 17) * You also state at that point that Fel had been overthrown; however, you go on to refer to him as the Emperor, leading one to believe that he was still the galactic sovereign. This persists throughout the article.
 * 18) **Changed to Emperor-in-exile to clarify :).
 * 19) *Fast-paced article. I felt like I was there. —Tommy9281 Dark side Master SWGTCG.jpg ( No quarter given, all exits sealed ) 23:48, 18 June 2009 (UTC)
 * 20) **Thanks for the review, Tommy :-).  Grunny  ( Talk ) 00:00, 19 June 2009 (UTC)

Comments
 * I believe that today is the day this becomes