Wookieepedia:Good article nominations/Hogrum Chalk

Hogrum Chalk

 * Nominated by: Menkooroo 06:22, May 19, 2010 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: Chalk it up to my love of the IK's.

Support

 * 1) OK with me.  Clone Commander Lee  Talk 17:15, May 19, 2010 (UTC)
 * 2) Chalk this one up there with you other excellent IK articles.--Jedi Kasra (comlink) 19:57, May 19, 2010 (UTC)
 * 3) Darth Trayus ( Trayus Academy ) 19:19, May 22, 2010 (UTC)

Trayus

 * "When Imperial Knight Azlyn Rae was grievously injured by the Sith Emperor Darth Krayt while battling him on Had Abbadon, she was fitted with life-preserving armor by the mechanic "Bantha" Rawk  on Kiffex before returning to the Imperial capital  of Bastion; after her arrival at the fortress world, Chalk fitted with her new armor." This sentence is a little tough to get through, just out of virtue of length and the numerous indicators of time. You have a "when", a "while", a "was", a "before", and an "after." See if you can streamline it.
 * My only other thing is that the P&T seems to have several phrases lifted directly from the above quote. If you could, can you find some suitable synonyms to use?
 * Trayus out. Darth Trayus ( Trayus Academy ) 06:28, May 20, 2010 (UTC)
 * Good catches. Ch-ch-check it out! Menkooroo 10:24, May 20, 2010 (UTC)