Wookieepedia:Inq/Redux page

 The Inquisitorius redux page is an active extension of Inquisitorius meetings, wherein Featured articles that have been updated, rewritten, or otherwise overhauled so significantly as to require a review of a section or of the entire article are placed. Articles that are placed here will be given reviews by Inquisitorius members, and when the required number of votes in favor of the article being passed are acquired, the article will be removed from the redux page and will retain its Featured status.

How the redux page works:


 * 1) During Inquisitorius meetings, articles that have recently received updates or overhauls so significant as to require a review of the new material will be voted on as "reduxed," tagged with the FA redux template, and placed on this page. Commonly, articles are chosen to be reduxed if they receive additions nearing or exceeding 10,000 bytes in size. Members of the Inquisitorius will then review the article or the section(s) of the article as necessary.
 * 2) Once an article has achieved the required number of supporting Inquisitorius votes and has no outstanding objections, it will be removed from the redux page and archived, and will keep its status as a Featured article. A nomination will be considered successful once it has achieved three supporting Inquisitorius votes with no outstanding objections. As an active extension of Inquisitorius meetings, only Inquisitorius votes will be counted.
 * 3) Any article that has outstanding objections for three weeks will be eliminated from the redux list by the Inquisitorius, and will be stripped of its Featured status.
 * 4) Instructions on how to add articles to Redux can be found here.

=Reduxed articles=

Battle of Borleias (Yuuzhan Vong War)

 * Redux comments: Sent to Redux per Meeting 40. Major rewrite; full review required.
 * Date added: February 12, 2011

(+0)
Support

Object
 * 1) Some starters
 * 2) * The article is quite long, so I actually think it could use some intro expansion.
 * 3) **Done. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 03:59, February 22, 2011 (UTC)
 * 4) * It could use a link check too; from what I've seen it looks pretty sparse at the moment.
 * 5) **Went through and added a bunch. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 03:59, February 22, 2011 (UTC)
 * 6) * I would place the navigation template below the external links&mdash;while the LG says succession boxes should be above the notes and references (thus above the external links), it doesn't say anything about navigation templates as far as I see. What do you think?
 * 7) **Yes, it looks better this way. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 03:59, February 22, 2011 (UTC)
 * 8) *Will give it a thorough review after these have been fixed. 1358  (Talk)  17:33, February 14, 2011 (UTC)
 * 9) Article requires confirmation for its name. The NEC does call it the "Battle of Borleias," but the article needs to somehow reflect that.  CC7567  (talk) 23:25, February 19, 2011 (UTC)
 * 10) *There's no official source for calling it "Second Battle of Borleias (Yuuzhan Vong War)" or even Second Battle of Borleias. Wookieepedia came up with that title to distinguish it from the first and second battles of Borleias in the GCW and the first battle for Borleias in the YVW. I'm not sure what you want here . . . we can move it to Battle of Borleias since it's canonically called that, but that'll mean fixing a whole bunch of disambiguation pages and redirects. If that's what you're looking for, let me know. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 03:59, February 22, 2011 (UTC)
 * 11) **Why don't you just move it to Battle of Borleias (Yuuzhan Vong War), which reflects the actual canonical title? Toprawa and Ralltiir 04:30, February 22, 2011 (UTC)
 * 12) ***Moved. The only page that linked to the original Battle of Borleias (Yuuzhan Vong War) redirect was this page. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 03:10, February 26, 2011 (UTC)
 * 13) ****The article has been moved, but so far that's all there's been to satisfy the objection&mdash;the naming throughout the article needs to be fixed too.  CC7567  (talk) 07:37, May 9, 2011 (UTC)
 * 14) *****Agreed and fixed. I didn't see this for awhile, sorry about the delay in addressing it. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 18:10, June 20, 2011 (UTC)


 * 1) Grunny:
 * 2) * Intro: "and additionally requisitioned additional military forces", I'd like to see additionally or additional changed given their close proximity.
 * 3) * New Republic capture of Borleias: "which had been used as a staging point for the assault on Coruscant by the Yuuzhan Vong and been granted to Domain Kraal." Since this is explained only two paragraphs above, does this need to be mentioned again?
 * 4) * New Republic capture of Borleias: "Having been driven from the galactic capital of Coruscant, elements of the New Republic's Fleet Group Three, without orders, attacked Borleias", "Knowing that refugees from Coruscant would head to Borleias, and wanting to take revenge on the Yuuzhan Vong, Fleet Group Three's leader, General Wedge Antilles, attacked the planet." I think these two sentences could be combined to reduce redundancy, as they appear to say the same basic fact (that Fleet Group Three attacked Borleias, just with slightly different context info). Thoughts?
 * 5) *I'll continue reading it in a few hours ad finish my review. grunny &#64; wookieepedia :&#126;$ 05:32, January 11, 2012 (UTC)
 * 6) **I think I tweaked all of these as needed. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 18:52, January 14, 2012 (UTC)
 * 7) *Question: Since this edit removed a duplicate quote, are there any other suitable quotes for that section? grunny &#64; wookieepedia :&#126;$ 14:21, February 17, 2012 (UTC)
 * 8) **Added suitable quote. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 02:40, February 28, 2012 (UTC)

Comments

Form V: Shien / Djem So

 * Redux comments: Sent to Redux per Meeting 40. Major rewrite; full review required
 * Date added: February 12, 2011

(+2)
Support
 * 1) Article is back in good shape.  Jonjedigrandmaster  ( Talk ) 20:20, May 8, 2011 (UTC)
 * 2)  1358  (Talk)  18:49, May 11, 2011 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) Jujiggum
 * 2) * BTS needs a lot of expansion; also, the bit about the Jedi Exile could use some more detail/better explanation
 * 3) **I expanded the bit about the Jedi Exile, but I'm at a loss for what else you are looking for in the BtS. I could add the standard "Form V has appeared in these sources" but beyond that, I'm not sure what else you're looking for&mdash;do you have specific sources in mind? I'd prefer not to add random fluff to it just to make it longer, so I'll wait for feedback on this one.
 * 4) ***I think you could at least explain its appearance as retcons in Eps II, V, and VI. Jonjedigrandmaster  ( Talk ) 20:56, February 26, 2011 (UTC)
 * 5) ****Done. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 05:05, March 2, 2011 (UTC)
 * 6) *****I think this could be stated much cleaner and without having to refer to "this article." Why not just say simply that the form's appearances in the films II, V, and VI are all retcons based on sources X, Y, and Z that state that the characters so-and-so used the form in these instances? Jonjedigrandmaster  ( Talk ) 05:32, March 2, 2011 (UTC)
 * 7) ******See what you think now. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 03:11, March 3, 2011 (UTC)
 * 8) *******That works. Jonjedigrandmaster  ( Talk ) 03:16, March 3, 2011 (UTC)
 * 9) * Seems to me like there is plenty of redundant information in the Practitioners section; I cut down some of it in my copy-edit, but even more could probably be removed.
 * 10) **I gave it a further trimming. To an extent, there will be some overlap because it's hard to discuss applications without mentioning the people involved but hopefully it's acceptable now. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 05:05, March 2, 2011 (UTC)
 * 11) ***Looks good. Jonjedigrandmaster  ( Talk ) 05:32, March 2, 2011 (UTC)
 * 12) * The fact that it's called "The Way of the Kray Dragon" needs to be mentioned somewhere in the main body.
 * 13) **Done. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 03:17, February 26, 2011 (UTC)
 * 14) * A few things for the affiliation section of the infobox: shouldn't the Jensaarai be mentioned there? Also, the "New Jedi Order" is covered by the overall implication of "Jedi". Either specify which Orders used the Form (i.e. Jedi Order, New Jedi Order, and then list all of the various Sith organizations which used it) or else just stick with the simple "Jedi," "Sith," and "Jensaarai"
 * 15) **Fixed that. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 03:17, February 26, 2011 (UTC)
 * 16) *I'll give it another look-over once these are fixed. Jonjedigrandmaster  ( Talk ) 19:06, February 19, 2011 (UTC)
 * 17) Toprawa:
 * 18) *If the form counts AOTC, ESB, and ROTJ among its Appearances, does it not also appear in those films' many adaptations? Toprawa and Ralltiir 04:49, July 24, 2011 (UTC)
 * 19) **I would think so, but I'll pose this question that's kept me from adding them in the past. We know from imagery in Fightsaber that retconned Form V was used in those movies, but the only basis for that is that you see the swordplay in the movie. Whereas in the book, radio drama, audiobook, etc. the swordplay is either written or described. If that constitutes an appearance in your mind, I'll gladly add them in to this article and the other saber form articles I upkeep. :) Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 22:19, July 24, 2011 (UTC)
 * 20) ***I would say these written descriptions, etc. count as appearances provided we can definitively pinpoint specific descriptions corresponding to whatever form we're dealing with. For example, if Form V says thrusting your lightsaber forward in a stabbing motion is part of the technique, and the novel describes Luke performing this action in a duel, then I would add the novel to the Appearances. Meaning that some adaptations may be game for inclusion, and others might not because they're just too generically described, for example. It's probably something you would need to go through each source and examine whether there's enough corresponding info to add it or not. Toprawa and Ralltiir 22:25, July 24, 2011 (UTC)
 * 21) ****Sounds good to me, will work on it. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 22:27, July 24, 2011 (UTC)
 * 22) *****I've gone through the sources and there's nothing incredibly explicit that just screams "This is Shien or Djem So." The Ep. VI novelization came close, but I'm not comfortable choosing what is an appearance and what isn't&mdash;it smacks of original research and seems to be something that could come back in the future as fodder for dispute. I suggest we either leave them off since there's nothing definitive to mark them as appearances, or label them all with Indirect appearance and Retcon. Thoughts? Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 04:40, August 2, 2011 (UTC)
 * 23) ******Sorry for the very delayed response. If you want to leave out most of the adaptations as being too ambiguous, I would probably be ok with that. However, I still have a problem with simply dismissing everything as not being clear enough, especially in cases like the junior novelizations, which, unlike the original novelization, for example, Ryder Windham went to pretty good effort to describe exactly what is happening in the films. I would certainly presume these to be good enough for inclusion, though obviously that should be checked for sure. Additionally, you should also be checking all the many dozens? hundreds? of random different pieces of source material that show film-still illustrations of these duels from the movies. For example, if Galaxy Guide 5 shows a film still of the Luke-Vader Death Star duel that we know from this same Fightsaber imagery to be Form V, that must also then be included in the Sources list. Toprawa and Ralltiir 22:21, January 12, 2012 (UTC)
 * 24) ******I understand that this is a very time-consuming thing and a lot of work to do and sources to go through. To try and make it easier on you, I would recommend going through the Appearances and Sources list for each of the three lightsaber duels in these movies and seeing what you can find in there. That's probably the best starting point: Rescue on Death Star I, Duel on Cloud City, and Duel on Death Star II. Toprawa and Ralltiir 17:57, January 16, 2012 (UTC)

Comments

Vote to remove nomination (Inq only)

 * 1) Although I recognize my own lengthy periods of severe neglect for my objections on this nom, the sheer scope of work-intensive detail required for the currently removal-eligible idle objection leads me to initiate this removal vote. I get the feeling that this is something that would be best worked on off the page, whenever the nominator or someone else has the time and interest to attend to it. Toprawa and Ralltiir 00:30, February 28, 2012 (UTC)
 * 2) Per above. Grand Moff Tranner Imperial Department of Military Research.svg (Comlink) 00:49, February 28, 2012 (UTC)
 * 3)  Jonjedigrandmaster  ( Talk ) 02:30, February 28, 2012 (UTC)

Warb Null

 * Redux comments: Sent to Redux per Meeting 42. took care of some issues and rewrote enough of the article that he recommended it be taken here.
 * Date added: June 18, 2011

(+0)
Support

Object
 * 1) Kreivi
 * 2) * The bio and the p&t still needs the information from here. Kreivi Wolter 11:17, June 26, 2011 (UTC)
 * 3) **Addressed.  —Tommy  9281  Sunday, June 26, 2011, 11:35 UTC 
 * 4) Toprawa:
 * 5) * Might I suggest an expansion of the intro? Relative to the rest of the body, it just seems kind of skimpy right now. Would like to see it beefed up a little bit more. Toprawa and Ralltiir 19:55, July 26, 2011 (UTC)
 * 6) **I dunno, it looks proportionate to me. I figure adding any more will be giving too much detail for an intro. If you feel strongly though I'll try and add something.  —Tommy  9281  Thursday, September 1, 2011, 08:43 UTC 
 * 7) *Please reload infobox. You could kill the redirect links too while you're in there. Toprawa and Ralltiir 22:46, January 12, 2012 (UTC)

Comments
 * Given the amount there's information regarding them, I think the article could include Equipment-section. Some info from p&a could be moved there. Kreivi Wolter 12:15, June 26, 2011 (UTC)
 * Given the two edits you just made that totally could have been done in the first place, feel free to take care of this under that same premise.  —Tommy   9281  Sunday, June 26, 2011, 12:20 UTC 

Vote to remove article's FA status (Inq only)
 * Unaddressed objection for over a month.  CC7567  (talk) 05:48, September 1, 2011 (UTC)

Mara Jade Skywalker

 * Redux comments: Sent to Redux per Meeting 42. Several outstanding issues including the use of first names throughout, common use of the present-tense "This," and incorrect image caption punctuation.
 * Date added: June 18, 2011

(+0)
Support

Object
 * 1) Jujiggum
 * 2) * Currently needs an update from Choices of One.
 * 3) *I'll give it a full review once the update has been made. Jonjedigrandmaster  ( Talk ) 17:41, September 4, 2011 (UTC)
 * 4) **Choices of One is updated, working on Extinction next. Thanks for your patience! Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 03:27, September 28, 2011 (UTC)
 * 5) CC
 * 6) * Extremely insufficient coverage of Extinction. I'm sure that there's a lot more that can be said from that comic.  CC7567  (talk) 06:45, September 9, 2011 (UTC)
 * 7) **Will get to both of these this weekend. I apologize, had login issues and been very busy IRL. Thanks for the thoughts. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 04:23, September 20, 2011 (UTC)
 * 8) ***Expanded Extinction. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 18:36, October 8, 2011 (UTC)

Comments
 * I apologize profusely for all the errors that I just corrected throughout the article. I rushed the fixes I made before the meeting, and while replacing 300 instances of "Mara" with "Jade" and "Jade Skywalker" isn't exactly exciting, that's what needed to be done. And my second mistake was not doing a satisfactory job of that task. That type of shoddy workmanship is not something I desire to exemplify on Wookieepedia&mdash;while I'm not the most polished writer and generally have lots of little errors, failing to allot proper time and effort to fixing the ones that were mentioned is inexcusable. Again, my apologies. I believe that all of the errors mentioned above are now corrected, with one caveat.
 * Caveat: There are some first names used in the article. The Solos tend to have their first names used with a preference of "Solo" for Han and "Organa Solo" for Leia when just one/both of those two are mentioned. Once the kids come into play, I used first names. I also use "Ben" exclusively when referring to Ben Skywalker since Luke is "Skywalker." If there is an alternate preference from the Inquisitorius, please advise. Atarumaster88  Jedi_Order.svg ( Talk page ) 02:09, June 20, 2011 (UTC)

Jace Dallin

 * Redux comments: Reduxed per meeting 44.
 * Date added: September 12, 2011

(+0)
Support

Object

Comments

Sagoro Autem

 * Redux comments: Reduxed per meeting 44.
 * Date added: September 12, 2011

(+0)
Support

Object

Comments

Squib

 * Redux comments: Reduxed per meeting 44.
 * Date added: September 13, 2011

(+0)
Support

Object

Comments
 * Hey, folks. Here's the diff from the featured version to now: diff. For the most part, the changes have all been general updating for new appearances and sources. The more substantial stuff is in the following modes:
 * Reloading and switching to the Species infobox, per all alien articles;
 * Better linking;
 * Use of citation templates where appropriate;
 * Adding links to and stubbing pertinent articles (such as random Squibs mentioned in various sources);
 * A bit of reshuffling of info such that social/cultural stuff is discussed in "Society and culture" rather than "Biology and appearance";
 * Copy editing to remove demonstrative pronouns and adjectives, which we seem not to like anymore;
 * Implementation of "gamemechanics" templates where appropriate;
 * Indications of alternative scenarios from roleplaying material in the BTS;
 * As such, hopefully it's evident that this has all been maintenance and updating, not deterioration of the article. It was the Ascension info update that made me think that a redux might be necessary, since that book added a substantial amount of knowledge about the species. ~ Savage BOB sig.png 16:45, September 13, 2011 (UTC)

Daric LaRone

 * Redux comments: Sent to Redux per Meeting 45. Large updates requiring re-review. Addition of "talents and abilities" section may be in order.
 * Date added: October 25, 2011

(+0)
Support

Object

Comments
 * A reminder that if this passes, it should be added to the queue, per Inq Meeting 42 (This was a failed RFAN). Menkooroo 07:30, November 5, 2011 (UTC)

Burl Ives

 * Redux comments: Sent to Redux per Meeting 45. Large additions requiring re-review.
 * Date added: October 25, 2011

(+1)
Support
 * 1) Good to go.  Jonjedigrandmaster  ( Talk ) 17:35, February 17, 2012 (UTC)

Object
 * 1) Jujiggum
 * 2) * "In high school, he played football and when he went on to Eastern Illinois State Teacher's College in 1927." Grammar. (Would've fixed this myself, but I'm not sure if this is meant to say that he went on to play at the College or if he played football in high school and then went on to attend the College.)
 * 3) **Checked the source and fixed it up.
 * 4) * "In 1953, Ives two new books: the Burl Ives Song Book, which included 115 folk songs, and Burl Ives' Sea Songs of Sailing, Whaling and Fishing, which included 68 songs." Grammar. (Again, I would've fixed this myself, but there are multiple words that could potentially fit here, and I didn't want to put in one that might be technically incorrect: i.e. "wrote," "released," "produced," etc.)
 * 5) **Went with "composed." Seemed the best fit. Menkooroo 17:33, February 17, 2012 (UTC)
 * 6) * Jonjedigrandmaster ( Talk ) 17:28, February 17, 2012 (UTC)

Comments
 * A reminder that if this passes, it should be added to the queue, per Inq Meeting 42 (This was a failed RFAN). Menkooroo 07:30, November 5, 2011 (UTC)

Gilad Pellaeon

 * Redux comments: Reduxed per Meeting 46 for the recent updates from Choices of One and Crisis of Faith.
 * Date added: December 1, 2011

(+0)
Support

Object
 * 1) Jujiggum
 * 2) *Also needs an update for Crimson Empire III: Empire Lost 2 (which has been out since last Nov). Jonjedigrandmaster  ( Talk ) 16:43, February 17, 2012 (UTC)

Comments