Wookieepedia:Featured article nominations/Bail Antilles

Bail Antilles

 * Nominated by: LelalMekha (talk) 15:00, December 31, 2012 (UTC)
 * Nomination comments: It certainly isn't ready, but I had to nominate it before the end of the Barn-burner. Be as harsh as needed.

Support

 * 1) Great work.  Commander Code-8  To say hi, press 42 02:32, January 15, 2013 (UTC)

CC-8

 * In the intro when you say he was a senator you need to say the Senate was part of the Republic. Same goes for the bio.
 * Done. --LelalMekha (talk) 23:45, January 2, 2013 (UTC)
 * Forgot to check this myself earlier, but the Republic still needs to be linked in the intro
 * Also forgot I'd written this one before I'd supported, so I sofixed it.  Commander Code-8  To say hi, press 42 11:07, January 15, 2013 (UTC)
 * Say that the Nebula Front was a group, I read this thinking it was an area or something
 * Added. --LelalMekha (talk) 23:45, January 2, 2013 (UTC)
 * Should there be an article on the assasination attempt on Valorum?
 * I'm not sure actually. I think we should hear the opinion of others on that matter before creating it. --LelalMekha (talk) 23:45, January 2, 2013 (UTC)
 * Well since it does have an impact on him, as in he was injured, I think it should have an article.
 * Then I'll make sure and create one tonight. --LelalMekha (talk) 11:57, January 14, 2013 (UTC)
 * In fact, an article already existed. It's now linked. --LelalMekha (talk) 02:05, January 15, 2013 (UTC)
 * I'll do the rest of this later.  Commander Code-8  To say hi, press 42 23:18, January 2, 2013 (UTC)
 * The rest: In the Invasion of Naboo section "lackey" seems like a bit of a slack word to use in the article, which might just be me my perception but I thought I'd bring it up.
 * Changed. Instead of "lackeys," the text now reads "Federation allies." --LelalMekha (talk) 11:57, January 14, 2013 (UTC)
 * In that paragraph you should proabably put Valorum's name somewhere rather than referring to him as other things
 * Added one mention of his name. See if it suffices. --LelalMekha (talk) 11:57, January 14, 2013 (UTC)
 * Also, Antilles' fierce corruption fighting had gained him a reputation of an overzealous reformer, which rendered him undesirable to the many greedy delegates I think this sentence shouldn't start off with also, just doesn't read right to me.
 * Well, it may stem from my not being a native speaker of English. The text now reads "besides." Is that all right? --LelalMekha (talk) 11:57, January 14, 2013 (UTC)
 * I was more thinking that the sentence shouldn't start with a word like also or besides, it makes it sound like it's just been attached as another quick thing. I'd word it as Antilles fierce corruption fighting had also gained him... or something like that. Sorry for not being too clear earlier.  Commander Code-8  To say hi, press 42 22:29, January 14, 2013 (UTC)
 * Fixed. --LelalMekha (talk) 02:05, January 15, 2013 (UTC)
 * I saw a Legacy section in this article before it was nominated, I was just wondering why it was removed, and it's still worth mentioning anyway that someone was named after him.  Commander Code-8  To say hi, press 42 04:25, January 14, 2013 (UTC)
 * Well, that's the point: we cannot be sure those two people were named after him. It has never been stated anywhere. Additionnally, "Antilles" seems to be a very common name among Humans&mdash;see Jon Antilles's BTS&mdash;and the first name "Bail" was shared by at least two Alderaanian males of the same generation. This is why I removed the legaçy section, because we just cannot tell whether those two other Bail Antilles were named after him or if it's just a coincidence. --LelalMekha (talk) 11:57, January 14, 2013 (UTC)
 * It sounds to me like it's worth a Bts mention that other people shared his name.  Commander Code-8  To say hi, press 42 22:29, January 14, 2013 (UTC)
 * Added. --LelalMekha (talk) 02:05, January 15, 2013 (UTC)

Comments

 * A round of applauses for Lelal! Good work getting it in on time. 501st  dogma ( talk ) 23:42, December 31, 2012 (UTC)
 * Umm... is this a support or actually a comment.  Commander Code-8  To say hi, press 42 00:02, January 1, 2013 (UTC)
 * Its a comment. Its under "Comments"..... 501st  dogma ( talk ) 00:39, January 1, 2013 (UTC)
 * Oh, it just sound like a support and had a number at the start, so I thought it could've been the wrong section. Never mind.  Commander Code-8  To say hi, press 42 06:47, January 1, 2013 (UTC)
 * My bad about the number. 501st  dogma ( talk ) 13:15, January 1, 2013 (UTC)
 * What about it do you think isn't ready? Any sources you need checked? Let us know when you think it's ready. Menkooroo (talk) 13:16, January 6, 2013 (UTC)
 * There are two sources I couldn't check personally. The first one is Star Wars Annual 2009&mdash;it was already in the sources list when I started working on the article, and I don't even know what could be said about the character in it. The second one is The Making of Star Wars: The Definitive Story Behind the Original Film&mdash;ref 28 is only based on secondhand reports. What also makes me unsure is the lack of pre-nom review before I FANed it. --LelalMekha (talk) 13:23, January 6, 2013 (UTC)
 * I have an issue about photos from that deleted scene being used in-universe. considering that the deleted scene showed Adrian Dunbar as "Bail Organa," I don't think that scene is canon, and I don't think photos from that deleted scene should be included in any in-universe parts of the article. Hanzo Hasashi (talk) 16:50, January 18, 2013 (UTC)
 * Well, I originally discussed that issue with SavageBob, and he answered to me: "If Dunbar has been retconned as Antilles, then I'd say it's a duck test to say that any images of him are images of Bail Antilles, not of "Adrian Dunbar as possibly Bail Organa."" In fact, his character was changed to Antilles even during production, and the name Organa is never prononced during that scene. If you can't get over that issue, I will have to take those picture off, but I really think they are useful. --LelalMekha (talk) 16:56, January 18, 2013 (UTC)
 * Not familiar with the deleted scene, but were the events of that mentioned in other canon? Hanzo Hasashi (talk) 17:10, January 18, 2013 (UTC)
 * It hasn't. But technically, it is not so much about using the scene itself as about using Dunbar's likeness, which was confirmed to be that of Antilles. Since Antilles was indeed confirmed to be the Senator of Alderaan at the time, and since Merian and Aldrete did appear as his aides in Star Wars Episode I: The Visual Dictionary, it's seems like fair game. --LelalMekha (talk) 17:21, January 18, 2013 (UTC)
 * Hmmm maybe you should ask other users about that then, I don't know what to make of that. Hanzo Hasashi (talk) 17:26, January 18, 2013 (UTC)