Ewok

Ever wanted to see a troll doll and an Ewok mixed together?

Well look what I forced an AI to create:

What is wrong with me? I don’t know…

But I have an obsession with created hellish abominations.

I mean a new heap of 5 year old ewok simps would comeand who dosent like ewoks so it would make star wars a bunch of money. and who wants to watch a crappy animated show from the 80s on disney plus. no i didnt think so

The concept would be to run around and try to escape the catacombs while also avoiding the geonosians. I think it would be fun. How would you feel about something like this?

(watch Lazypurple's "extras from how it feels to play pyro" video at 7:06-7:12 if you wanna know where to find the pics I used in this meme)

This guide is for anyone who has already told everyone they ever knew everything you have ever known about Star Wars and are just looking for some garbage to pull out of the sky for a Star Wars related conversation.

I made this because I am a sicko.

1. Equipment you will need.

When hunting an Ewok, you will want to have the high ground.

As Obi-Wan Kenobi once had, you will need to have elevation over your enemy. Anything similar in design to an LAAT gunship, perhaps with some more safety mechanisms to prevent you from falling out while hunting, and a little less loud, would be preferred. Make sure you also have a useful arsenal of blasters. You will want to have a blaster rifle with a sniper configuration to snipe the Ewoks, as they have plenty of traps on ground. You are only superior in the sky. You may also want to carry a blaster pistol or small blaster rifle on you as well, as there may be some leftover Ewoks when you ground to collect the bodies. A knife would also be preferable, as well as a flashlight, a comm link to nearby assistance (You should never hunt alone), and a storage device to store your Ewoks.

Be sure to have some spare medical items on you. Whether it be a quick injection of Bacta, (If this is the case, bring at least 3), some Flintstone Gummy's or anything else. Also carry bandages and other standard first-aid kit supplies. Ewoks have many devious tricks and traps that they will use against you, so being prepared for if they do get a hit on you is always a good idea.

2. Tactics you will employ.

When you are on your hunt, you will find yourself using these tactics.

When you are sniping from the sky, be sure to scout the area. Be on the lookout for traps and places of high Ewok-activity. This will be important later. Also try to find a smaller "tribe", this will come in handy when landing.

When grounding to collect the body, traps will be everywhere. Try to find a smaller looking settlement. DO NOT LEAVE ANY EWOKS BEHIND. Ewoks are dangerous little fellows, just 2 or 3 of them can overwhelm you, and if you're not prepared, even 1 can do some damage. Smaller settlements are easier to take out, which is why we asked you to look for one during the flying segment of the hunt. This part should be fairly easy if everything mentioned above has been completed without error. Collecting your reward is an easy job, simply load the body into the storage device used. However, if an Ewok prior to their death has called for help from other "tribes", you will want to be especially swift in collecting your reward. Less Ewoks are also easy to carry, another perk of hunting smaller factions.

It is important to always be aware of your surroundings, as anything could be waiting. From wild animals to traps, anything could be lurking. If you inspected the geography of the area correctly, you should have a good enough knowledge of your area. Don't stray too far off from your ship, anything could go wrong, and if it does, you want to get out of there, and fast. You will also need to have a blaster on the ready. Please use either the mentioned blaster pistol or small blaster rifle, as these are easy to carry. Having a knife is also preferable, in the event you are stuck in a trap and need to cut your way out. If other Ewoks approach, prepare to dip. You may use your combat tools such as the knife and blasters to fend them off, but do not underestimate their power. Call for whoever you trusted to pilot the ship used in the first half of the hunt and leave the premises with whatever reward you collected. Even if no one approaches, always remain weary. If caught in a trap, you will want to use your knife. Most traps should be constructed of rope, so, you will want to wiggle your way out using the combined weight of you, your equipment and whatever else was caught, eventually, when you can reach your tools, take your knife and cut yourself free.

(________)

And that concludes this sick, twisted guide. I hope this knowledge serves you well in the real world where Ewoks don't exist.

Hello There! Welcome to the review archive for Star Wars Ewoks, I have been given the pleasure to review all of the Star Wars Ewoks episodes! This archive will hold all the posts in the comment section as they are released! You may also continue the discussion here about Star Wars Ewoks

We will start of with the first episode, "The Cries of the Trees". Hope you will join us and give us your thoughts on the episode too. It will be released later soon. Have a great day!