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This page is for Featured article nominations. A Featured article is an article that is of complete quality and represents the best a Wookieepedia article can be. It is for fully fleshed out subjects that go beyond the limited content of Good and Comprehensive articles. On this page, users can nominate articles that they believe are ready to be reviewed to achieve Featured status.

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Contents

Featured article nominations

View recent changes for this page and its subpages

Unidentified Trade Federation base

  • Nominated by: Commander Code-8 Hello There! 14:00, 9 May 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: Screw it, I will max out all my possible nominations until I get too busy for editing regularly
  • WookieeProject (optional):

(2 Inqs/5 Users/7 Total)

(Votes required: 1 Inqvote(s) required to reach minimum. No additional votes required to pass, please consider reviewing another article.)

Support

  1. Good job! ~ D MCCG D MCCG.png (chat) 23:33, 9 May 2021 (UTC)
  2. Reviewed on Discord. Note that I have given Code until 2030 to finish Operation Galactic Battlegrounds. JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 00:32, 10 May 2021 (UTC)
  3. DwartiiDelver (talk) 22:16, 14 May 2021 (UTC)
  4. Well done.--Liverpool92Ackbar HS.jpg 15:30, 27 May 2021 (UTC)
  5. The T-Feds were gonna call it Buttercup Acres, but Qui-Gon leveled it before they could erect the sign. OtterSurf (talk) 10:25, 28 June 2021 (UTC)
  6. Inqvote.png Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 11:17, 8 September 2021 (UTC)
  7. Inqvote.png MasterFredCommerce Guild.svg(talk) 22:32, 6 November 2021 (UTC)

Object

Dwartii
  • In the final paragraph of the History section, there are two back-to-back sentences that begin with "With". I think it'd be preferable to try and change one of these so it's not quite as repetitive. DwartiiDelver (talk) 03:33, 14 May 2021 (UTC)
Shayanomer
Imp
  • Similarly to the Battle for Alaris Prime article, the quote captions should specify who is QGJ talking to. Imperators II(Talk) 09:43, 25 October 2021 (UTC)
  • Is the base actually ever explicitly identified as a settlement? I feel like a settlement and a military base should not be treated as equivalent by default.
    • It is not, but the definition of a settlement according to Google is "a place, typically one which has previously been uninhabited, where people establish a community." Mileage may vary on whether droids can constitute a community but I think this location still fits that description, especially given that the base also has farms.
  • I believe that the fact that the Wookiees secured control over Alaris Prime and that the Battle for Alaris Prime was the final battle of the conflict are both intro-exclusive; in the body you only note the Wookiees' intention to prevail in the conflict and them being victorious in the battle.
    • Done
  • Seems like something is missing after "Trade Federation": "the Wookiees constructed a base near the Trade Federation and orchestrated"
    • Fixed
  • "grass-covered" makes it sound like the base was completely overgrown with grass, can you rephrase this? Perhaps say that the base was constructed in a cleared patch of grassland or something like that?
    • Done
  • "The southern face of the wall had a gate from which a path led south to the river and was accessible by a ford." — I'm not entirely sure what "was accessible by a ford" refers to here? The path, or the gate? Maybe you can reword this to clarify?
    • Done
  • Could you perhaps try and restructure the Description so that each paragraph more or less talks about some specific aspect of the base? I could see having paragraphs on the topographical description, natural resources, and the buildings and infrastructure, for example. As it is right now, the paragraphs kind of mix what they're talking about, with a somewhat awkward paragraph break in between several sentences on natural resources.
    • Best I could come up with was to reorder it to have a paragraph on military buildings and another on resources and storage centers
  • I'd like to see some context for mynocks. Definitely the part about them being parasites that posed a threat technological structures, and possibly the fact that they were mostly unable to survive outside of the vacuum of space, with the exception of some variants.
    • Their threat to technology has no consequence in the game, they're only present as a food source, so I don't see how mentioning it is relevant. Added the variant bit
      • You don't really have to look at it from the OOU perspective of what's important to the gameplay. The CSWE entry says mynocks fed on both energy and silica and other minerals, and The New Essential Guide to Alien Species says this about planetary variants of mynocks: "These creatures pose a particular problem for inhabited systems, as not just ships but also buildings, structures, livestock, and even humanoids sleeping outdoors are at risk." and even this for mynocks in general: "regardless of the variety, mynocks can pose a hazard regardless of their environment". Based on this, I think mynocks could definitely pose a potential problem to this base—which as far as we know was even staffed by droids—and that you should therefore note it in the article. Imperators II(Talk) 11:58, 26 November 2021 (UTC)
  • A couple of instances of redundant-sounding wording: "The Wookiees established a settlement to the south of the Trade Federation settlement", "With their path clear, the ground forces, including bowcaster troopers and sentinel strike mechs, marched into the base to clear it out."
    • Done
  • Just to confirm: does Pekt really swear that he *can* profit? Or that he *will* profit?
    • The latter, updated.
  • Also, the article text is currently assuming that the reader is necessarily familiar with the context of Trandoshans pelting Wookiees for specific cultural reasons, which is not all a reasonable assumption, in my opinion.
    • The cultural elements aren't quite relevant, Pekt's just out to make a buck, I added a bit more in his first mention so the pelt thing doesn't come out of left field so much
  • Ugh, could you please clarify the base's topography to me? Which side is northward in the infobox image? Right now, from comparing the text in the Description section and the image it seems like the cardinal directions are inverted relative to the real-world system, i.e., it seems like "south" is positive 90 degrees away from "west".
    • It's straight cardinal directions, I've adjusted the wording in a couple of spots that may have been confusing
  • Similarly, how many gates exactly does the base have? One, two? Is the "entrance" described in Description also a gate? And how many fords there? Right now, the sentence "The entrance could be accessed by a ford on the southern stretch of the river." makes it ambiguous as to whether there's one ford or two. Imperators II(Talk) 18:37, 13 November 2021 (UTC)
    • That other entrance is just a gap and there's just two fords, that rewording hopefully sorts it. I've ended up subsectioning the description section so I'll work on another quote and image when I'm less sleepy Commander Code-8 Hello There! 13:34, 19 November 2021 (UTC)

Comments

  • Just a note on the history quote, I can't find that exact audio file that matches what appears in the level, there's one that matches the quote almost entirely with the small difference of calling the fortress a "government center." If anyone else with the game can find the proper one in case it's just my version being weird, that would be great. Commander Code-8 Hello There! 14:22, 9 May 2021 (UTC)


Fideltin Rusk

  • Nominated by: Cade StupidRepublicEmblem-Traced-TORkit.svg Calrayn 03:54, 5 June 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments:
  • WookieeProject (optional): WP:TOR

(0 Inqs/4 Users/4 Total)

(Votes required: 3 Inqvote(s) required to reach minimum. No additional votes required to pass, please consider reviewing another article.)

Support

  1. Nice to have you back, Cade. VergenceScatter (talk) 15:42, 22 June 2021 (UTC)
  2. Great job. OtterSurf (talk) 11:28, 24 June 2021 (UTC)
  3. Return of the compansion FAs. Commander Code-8 Hello There! 11:02, 7 July 2021 (UTC)
  4. Erebus Chronus (Talk) 04:38, 1 August 2021 (UTC)

Object

CC-8
  • Current standards favour much shorter subsections due to the death of Monobook, which you can see throughout other current noms or recent FAs.Commander Code-8 Hello There! 04:16, 7 June 2021 (UTC)
    • Per discussion on Discord the recommendations were that sectioning should follow natural divisions of content, so I guess the ones in the biography section are okay. I was going to suggest subsectioning the Bts but I can't find a break that wouldn't only leave one paragraph behind. Commander Code-8 Hello There! 09:30, 8 June 2021 (UTC)
  • If commander is not given as his actual rank those links should pipelink to Commanding officer/Legends instead.
    • Done.
  • Time on Hoth: May be my weary eyes but I can't tell which decade is being referred to in the first sentence
    • Updated the Mindor/end of war stuff in the paragraph above, and the paragraph below, to include dates.
  • Neither of his parents are currently linked. Commander Code-8 Hello There! 09:30, 8 June 2021 (UTC)
  • The exact date behind the year isn't necessary per the Layout Guide. Commander Code-8 Hello There! 11:58, 14 June 2021 (UTC)
  • I think describing the info given from the encyclopedia in the Bts is unnecessary.
  • I'll have to check some youtube videos later, are there notable differences in how Rusk interacts with the player in Fallen Empire if they're continuing playing as the Jedi Master as opposed to other classes? Commander Code-8 Hello There! 02:46, 22 June 2021 (UTC)
      • Nothing too special. Doesn't talk much about the time jump. Cade StupidRepublicEmblem-Traced-TORkit.svg Calrayn 14:15, 22 June 2021 (UTC)
        • "Stars, it's good to see your face. Sorry about the undignified welcome. They don't make leashes tight enough for this lot."
        • "I'm glad to see you too. It seems like you've climbed the ranks since I've been gone."
        • "There are very few people who would choose this command, but I'm honored to shoulder the burden for the good of the Republic."
          • I think it would be fine to mention that there's specific dialogue if the player is reuniting with Rusk in the BTS.
  • Watching some videos and it seems that the Commander gets a tip off to find Rusk from Bey'wan Aygo and chews out a soldier named Merghal, which can be added to the bio, and the mission the player can undertake for Rusk should go in the bts too. Commander Code-8 Hello There! 08:50, 25 June 2021 (UTC)
    • Added mention of the dialogue, but the mission's already mentioned in the BTS, unless you're referring to something else. Cade StupidRepublicEmblem-Traced-TORkit.svg Calrayn 15:29, 25 June 2021 (UTC)
Vergence
Shayanomer
  • Straight off the bat, I want to see more sectioning employed in the article. I'm also noticing empty space that can use more images (which btw look pretty small to me currently). Since this is a video game subject, I hope images won't be an issue. More to come after this is done. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 07:15, 25 October 2021 (UTC)
    • sectioned; working on images and quotes. Cade StupidRepublicEmblem-Traced-TORkit.svg Calrayn 17:48, 5 November 2021 (UTC)
    • Aaand done. 16:15, 12 November 2021 (UTC)
      • Anything for the BTS? It's currently six completely unsectioned paragraphs. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 16:27, 12 November 2021 (UTC)
        • Broke it into two, though they're uneven, but that's the only organic way to split the content. Cade StupidRepublicEmblem-Traced-TORkit.svg Calrayn 23:23, 24 November 2021 (UTC)
Fred strikes back
  • (Comment): I went ahead and increased the image sizes even more. From one old Wook soul to another, it took a while for the large image size trend to grow on me, and I thought it looked gaudy for years, so I'm sure it'll be the same for you. haha
  • (Review note): "Among" is preferred over "amongst" in American English.
  • For ref 11, are we really assuming as the last sentence states? Seems like we have a lot of reasoning to say it definitely does take place in that timeframe. MasterFredCommerce Guild.svg(talk) 00:07, 14 November 2021 (UTC)
    • We have a definitive date for the fall of the Treaty (middle of 3641) but most of the Act II class content takes place before the Treaty collapse, and there are unclear time jumps between Acts 2-3. Not like anyone's ever gonna tell us otherwise, but that's why TORdates is written that way. Cade StupidRepublicEmblem-Traced-TORkit.svg Calrayn 20:15, 16 November 2021 (UTC)
  • Something seems to be wrong with ref 36. MasterFredCommerce Guild.svg(talk) 06:53, 22 November 2021 (UTC)
    • My own templates were working against me; I don't have dating text for that specific of a patch. Fixed. Cade StupidRepublicEmblem-Traced-TORkit.svg Calrayn 23:23, 24 November 2021 (UTC)
  • One last thing: the parentheses in the fourth paragraph of the Bts can be removed and the text worked into the prose. MasterFredCommerce Guild.svg(talk) 10:01, 30 November 2021 (UTC)

Comments

Dromund Kaas operation

  • Nominated by: Cade StupidRepublicEmblem-Traced-TORkit.svg Calrayn 04:08, 5 June 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: Resubmitting this one; it was removed by Tope because of my absence and some unconfirmed changes (which I've since reviewed and am fine with)
  • WookieeProject (optional): WP:TOR

(1 Inqs/4 Users/5 Total)

(Votes required: 2 Inqvote(s) required to reach minimum. No additional votes required to pass, please consider reviewing another article.)

Support

  1. OtterSurf (talk) 10:02, 28 June 2021 (UTC)
  2. Commander Code-8 Hello There! 09:07, 11 July 2021 (UTC)
  3. A very absorbing read, and well-done! Minnabird Naboo.svg (talk) 03:15, 12 August 2021 (UTC)
  4. Inqvote.png Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 16:22, 23 August 2021 (UTC)
  5. I read this yesterday and forgot to support, really great stuff. JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 01:13, 25 August 2021 (UTC)

Object

CC-8 operation
  • The intro says that the galaxy at large believed the Emperor's death, but later on says that it was secret for two years.
    • Clarified.
  • The prelude and galaxy at large could use an image, and the operation could do with subsectioning
    • Images added, but there's really no place to subsection, as I'd have to put it in the middle of the GameLS section - which needs to be grouped because it's all about the same part of the event - or at the start of it, and that leaves a 2-paragraph part preceding it.
  • Is Scourge's vision of the Hero standing over the Emperor not technically an appearance for this event? Commander Code-8 Hello There! 03:49, 22 June 2021 (UTC)
    • Fair point. Updated. Cade StupidRepublicEmblem-Traced-TORkit.svg Calrayn 14:47, 22 June 2021 (UTC)
  • Is it clear why the Hero couldn't be controlled by the Emperor? Commander Code-8 Hello There! 12:33, 7 July 2021 (UTC)
    • I don't believe so, no. It's basically "you're the player character and special" with a dash of "you've broken free before" but I don't think it's stated. Cade StupidRepublicEmblem-Traced-TORkit.svg Calrayn 15:55, 7 July 2021 (UTC)
  • I think a line about where the Emperor hibernated after the operation would be relevant, and would a description of his ultimate fate be taking it too far? Commander Code-8 Hello There! 05:21, 9 July 2021 (UTC)
    • Added the fate stuff, but it's unclear where his physical body was, AFAIK. He's just in hibernation in his original form (which I clarified again as well) Cade StupidRepublicEmblem-Traced-TORkit.svg Calrayn 19:22, 9 July 2021 (UTC)
Shayanomer
  • Infobox:
  • Can you specify the actual source with the holomessage in Ref 2?
    • Done.
  • The infobox has the only dual reference in the article. Is it necessary to have two sources cited there?
    • Fixed.
  • In "Casualties," can you be more specific than just "Moderate" or "Heavy"? What kind of losses did both sides endure?
    • It's unclear, as the player only sees a small part of the fight. We don't get any info on the space battle beyond the general "taken losses" and that the Imperial forces on the ground encountered by the Hero's crew are defeated.
  • Main body:
  • Second intro paragraph can definitely use a break.
  • Images can be enlarged.
  • "With that discovery, the seeds of rebellion were sown." Without context, this has a very unencyclopedic tone.
    • Clarified.
  • BTS:
  • Per Layout Guide, more precise release dates for Revan (also missing author) and the TOR game are needed.
    • Revan, yes, but I was under the impression that "2011" was sufficient for TOR.
      • They're needed because both sources came out in the same year, as stated in the section linked above. Also, can Revan's full date be sourced to the novel? Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 16:40, 20 July 2021 (UTC)
        • All of these are done. Cade StupidRepublicEmblem-Traced-TORkit.svg Calrayn 23:09, 8 August 2021 (UTC)
  • Some of the BTS's first paragraph feels unnecessary since you've already detailed what happened after the operation in the Aftermath section.
    • Trimmed.
  • Per ample precedent, assumptions by the article should not be relegated to reference notes and instead should be detailed in the BTS itself.
    • Done.
  • Add Revan and Annihilation audiobooks to Appearances.
    • Done.
  • Reviewing note: Please see this Manual of Style clause: "But do not link individual words within proper compound nouns (examples: Death Star, Azure Dianoga Cantina, Galactic Empire, Bantha-class assault shuttle)". Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 11:32, 10 July 2021 (UTC)
    • Are there any left, or did you remove them all? This was written a while ago but I'll keep that in mind. Cade StupidRepublicEmblem-Traced-TORkit.svg Calrayn 15:53, 20 July 2021 (UTC)
      • I removed them wherever I saw them, but it would be good to go over it again just in case. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 16:40, 20 July 2021 (UTC)
  • Are there any ships that can be clearly seen in the battle? They can be documented under "Strength" in the infobox, and in the body.
  • I'd like to see some sectioning done to Prelude. I can see a split between the stuff the Emperor did and the Galactic War breaking out. I also want to see some more context for that section's image caption. There is also space for another image and another quote after sectioning.
  • "The operation" desperately needs some sectioning, a split between the planning phase and paragraphs covered by GameLS will suffice.
  • First image's caption in "Aftermath" can benefit from more elaboration.
  • 1stID missing from Appearances, since the BTS makes it clear the name does not come from Revan. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 18:10, 22 August 2021 (UTC)
  • One last thing, can you add an image to the BTS? Either the cover of Revan or TOR will do. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 07:28, 23 August 2021 (UTC)
    • Done, the BTS image from the Hero actually shows the operation so it was a perfect fit. Cade StupidRepublicEmblem-Traced-TORkit.svg Calrayn 16:02, 23 August 2021 (UTC)
Minnabird
  • Should 3640 BBY be linked in the body, even if on "around a year later"? Right now it's linked only in infobox, intro, and references.
  • Do we know why Scourge betrayed the Emperor? Is it just that it was fate? What does he tell the player character?
  • "he detected that one of the Hero's companions was about to be overwhelmed by Imperial Guard reinforcements nearby" Do we know how he detected it? were there like, cameras? If he just said "they're about to be overwhelmed!" and we don't know how he knows it's fine as-is.
  • "He scoffed at the Hero's claim that they would open his eyes to the way of the Jedi by taking him to Tython, arguing that, by doing so, the Hero clung to Tol Braga's old ambitions, ignoring their true desires." Not 100% clear what's happening here. What are Tol Braga's old ambitions/how are they relevant or how would the player character react to them? Whose true desires? I also don't think "by doing so" really connects well to the thing it's supposed to describe; the phrase suggests it's referring back to a verb, which I think is supposed to be "claim," but that's used as a noun in the sentence? If that makes any sense at all. Basically: didn't revise this sentence because I'm not 100% sure how to do so.
  • Do we know who Admiral Dabrin is? He turns up for the award ceremony seemingly without context. Minnabird Naboo.svg (talk) 02:48, 12 August 2021 (UTC)
    • All addressed via Discord. Cade StupidRepublicEmblem-Traced-TORkit.svg Calrayn 03:13, 12 August 2021 (UTC)
OOM
  • I've just started Chapter 3 for the Jedi Knight storyline, so I'll skip reviewing the parts on the operation itself for now.
    • Firstly (I don't know the exact details of the mission yet), I'm not sure if the article needs to provide so much context about Vitiate's rise to power—in particular, the whole of the first two paragraphs seem to be irrelevant. For example, in Race against doomsday, "as he had Nathema" is a nice way to link back to the ritual, but it can just be removed along with the first two paragraphs.
    • "rendering him immortal and granting him immense strength in the Force" — I'd say it's better to swap these around since immortality is a part of increased power.
    • I've noticed some missing links (e.g. Living Force/Legends, Sith Emperor, Millennium/Legends) in the two paragraphs, so you might want to look over the article again and add links where appropiate.
    • Since the fates of Revan and Scourge are mentioned, you may as well say that the Exile was killed.
    • You can mention how the Jedi came to know that the Emperor was planning a ritual to consume the whole galaxy in Race against doomsday.
      • All of the above are done.
    • BTS: I don't see the significance of mentioning Chancellor Saresh's announcement in the first paragraph.
      • It's a major plot point of the post-game, that the Empire and the Republic don't know of the Emperor's defeat. It's why they're in confusion at Ilum, and why Malgus breaks from the Empire, and it's kept as a secret (but rumored) until Makeb.
    • "fighting the Emperor in the Dark Temple in its summary of the Jedi Knight class storyline" — You can cut down on the detail here. At this point, reader only needs to know that the Dromund Kaas operation is depicted in the book. OOM 224 18:48, 5 November 2021 (UTC)
    • Actually, I think that last paragraph should be removed entirely. Sample player characters are now frequently used on swtor.com and their social media posts, and since the fact that images of sample player characters are non-canonical doesn't have anything to do with the Dromund Kaas operation itself, the information here can just be moved to the Hero of Tython article, à la The Barsen'thor#Character identity and customization. OOM 224 10:58, 6 November 2021 (UTC)
      • Removed.
  • Per this and now this, you can make the wording here less awkward by using gender-neutral pronouns for the player character. OOM 224 10:58, 6 November 2021 (UTC)
    • Ehhh, I'm fine with it as is, but if you/anyone else can point out specific cases I'll change em. Cade StupidRepublicEmblem-Traced-TORkit.svg Calrayn 19:17, 18 November 2021 (UTC)

Comments

Sajar

  • Nominated by: Cade StupidRepublicEmblem-Traced-TORkit.svg Calrayn 04:32, 5 June 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: Another former Featured Article; ecks's objections from the review have been satisfied.
  • WookieeProject (optional): WP:TOR

(0 Inqs/4 Users/4 Total)

(Votes required: 3 Inqvote(s) required to reach minimum. No additional votes required to pass, please consider reviewing another article.)

Support

  1. JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 17:31, 13 June 2021 (UTC)
  2. OtterSurf (talk) 11:35, 24 June 2021 (UTC)
  3. Commander Code-8 Hello There! 07:53, 27 July 2021 (UTC)
  4. DwartiiDelver (talk) 20:14, 8 August 2021 (UTC)

Object

Macaroni
  • You're in Category:TOR dates usages without act argument, whatever that means.
    • Done.
  • Can 3653 BBY actually be sourced to ref 1?
    • Resourced.
  • Could use an equipment section to discuss his lightsaber and clothing, which is currently being done in skills and abilities.
    • Ehhhh.... done, but frankly it looks rather terrible separate from the P&T.
  • Spaces should be replaced by underscores in filenames (e.g. [[File:Luke_Skywalker.jpg]] instead of [[File:Luke Skywalker.jpg]]).
    • Done.
  • The first P+T paragraph can probably be split into two, it's quite large.
    • Done.
  • Some context for Nar Shaddaa in the Bts would be nice. JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 19:46, 10 June 2021 (UTC)
CC-8
  • Could use an image in the second bio section.
  • I think we should avoid using the word "this" outside of the Bts. Commander Code-8 Hello There! 09:43, 11 July 2021 (UTC)
Imp
  • Since Blood of the Empire Act 3 doesn't feature Sajar, ref 4 should specify what exactly establishes that he was a Dark Councilor following the comic's events.
    • Hmmm, actually, there's no good way to word it, so I've removed it entirely - basically, we know that he served on the Council sometime *after* 3678 BBY, because the Children were first created then, but honestly that's not enough to necessitate a mention, as he could've served any time in the next 25 years before the war ended.
  • Is there any way to further split up the "Incident on Quesh" section? As it is right now, with the right rail module enabled it takes up an entire one-and-a-half screen on my machine. Imperators II(Talk) 11:26, 15 November 2021 (UTC)
    • Ehhh... I could put one before the gamemechanics but that looks.... rough to me and rather short. Cade StupidRepublicEmblem-Traced-TORkit.svg Calrayn 20:13, 16 November 2021 (UTC)
      • Trust me, in this age of internet reading and short attention spans, it's better to have a passage slightly on the short side than one that stretches for more than an entire screen. Imperators II(Talk) 20:15, 16 November 2021 (UTC)
        • grumble: done. Cade StupidRepublicEmblem-Traced-TORkit.svg Calrayn 20:21, 16 November 2021 (UTC)

Comments

Attack on Fondor

  • Nominated by: Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 08:52, 5 June 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: First time doing a battle longer than CA length. I decided not to include info from "Destroyer Down" as the battle in that story is pretty much unrelated to this one.
  • WookieeProject (optional): WP:AMB, WP:SWBF, WP:VG

(1 Inqs/4 Users/5 Total)

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Support

  1. JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 18:48, 14 June 2021 (UTC)
  2. Nicely done. DwartiiDelver (talk) 15:50, 4 July 2021 (UTC)
  3. Great work, in my opinion! LucaRoR (talk) 17:19, 13 July 2021 (UTC)
  4. Commander Code-8 Hello There! 07:31, 29 July 2021 (UTC)
  5. Inqvote.png OOM 224 21:16, 31 October 2021 (UTC)

Object

Average Battlefront enjoyer
Macaroni
Regular FA consumer
Ratts
  • "…at Fondor Station within the Fondor Shipyards over the world Fondor" can you reword or rearrange this? It's a bit repetitive.
  • There's little mention of the dialogue between Iden and Raythe during the mission. While not all of it is relevant, they do discuss tactics that affect how the battle plays out, so I think that should be touched upon.
  • "As the battle progressed, Versio destroyed multiple fighters tailing Hask's TIE fighter." That's not necessarily true, since two of the fighters are scripted to crash during the chase scene, regardless if Iden shoots them or not. The player is only required to destroy one ship during this objective, being the A-wing.
  • In the last paragraph of "Imperial victory," you should clarify that Iden destroys both the control tower and the docking arm, an order she initially objects to. RattsT (talk) 01:49, 1 August 2021 (UTC)
    • Handled via Discord. RattsT (talk) 09:04, 1 August 2021 (UTC)
OOM
  • "Inferno Squad fought through rebel forces and fled the moon in TIE fighters" — I don't see how this is relevant to the article.
    • Not sure how else to explain Inferno Squad leaving the moon and splitting up. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 12:47, 24 October 2021 (UTC)
      • Fair enough OOM 224 18:33, 26 October 2021 (UTC)
  • Similarly, I think you can cut down on the details about Meeko's mission to Pillio. The mission doesn't really tie in to what the Empire achieved at Fondor other than the fact that it's a part of Operation: Cinder that came right after the battle for Inferno Squad. OOM 224 12:38, 24 October 2021 (UTC)
  • Would it not be worth including Ralsius Paldora's mention of the attack in the article body? OOM 224 18:33, 26 October 2021 (UTC)

Comments

  • Added info from "Destroyer Down" per discussion with other editors. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 10:28, 16 June 2021 (UTC)
    • So, I'm not going to make this an objection, since I'm unsure of it, but I feel like the destroyer down section could start with "The Galactic Civil War returned to Fondor shipyards around 5 ABY when..." I feel like including that could explain to readers why its being recounted, since that's why we on the discord agreed it should be mentioned. Maybe this is just me so I'm framing this as a comment, not an objection, if anyone wants to weigh in feel free Editoronthewiki (talk) 19:13, 26 October 2021 (UTC)
      • It works either way, but it's not really necessary since the mere presence of the info makes it pretty obvious that it's relevant to the subject. OOM 224 21:16, 31 October 2021 (UTC)
  • Updated with info from Emperor Palpatine. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 15:31, 16 June 2021 (UTC)


Revan

  • Nominated by: Cade StupidRepublicEmblem-Traced-TORkit.svg Calrayn 04:24, 12 June 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: hehehehehehehehe. Hi there. Did ya miss me?
  • WookieeProject (optional): WP:TOR, WP:KOTOR

(1 Inqs/3 Users/4 Total)

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Support

  1. D MCCG D MCCG.png (chat) 03:06, 18 June 2021 (UTC)
  2. OtterSurf (talk) 10:03, 28 June 2021 (UTC)
  3. It'd be great for Legends Revan to return to FA status. —Tomotron Revanchist Sith.svg (Star Forge) 06:52, 7 July 2021 (UTC)
  4. Inqvote.png The man, the myth, the legend... Supreme Emperor Holocomm 18:02, 30 November 2021 (UTC)

Object

Tomotron
Vergence
Braha'tok/Legends
Up to Rise of the Sith
  • "According to Mical, Revan returned to his first teacher in order to learn how to best leave the Jedi Order, though he did not follow through." You're trying to keep a trend of saying Revan is not named Revan yet, but this seems to be an anomaly.
    • Fixed.
  • "Outraged at the Jedi Council's refusal to involve the Order in the conflict, the young Jedi Knight began to move among the Order," What do you mean by "move among the order"?
    • Reworded.
  • Second and forth paragraphs of The Revanchist are too bloated. As is the forth paragraph of Fighting the Mandalorians and the final paragraph of Dark Lord of the Sith. Bisecting them accordingly is advised.
  • "Alec and his followers" is used multiple times, but that format makes it sound like they could be Alec's followers.
    • Reworded.
  • "Shortly after the Adasca affair, the Taris Siege, and the bombardment of Jebble," the last two events are just passingly mentioned with no context and don't seem relevant to the narrative at all. I'd say it's better to not mention them at all.
    • Done.
  • "Anointing his new servants as Darth Revan and Darth Malak, the Dark Lords of the Sith, the Emperor sent them back to the Republic as a vanguard to his own invasion, ordering them to make use of the Rakatan Star Forge and to report back when they had crushed the Republic's resistance." The reintroduction of the Star Forge makes it look like the Sith suddenly had it, and then we find out that Revan is locating it after he searched a lil bit. I'd try and say from the start that Revan and Malak needed to locate and obtain the Star Forge.
    • Changed to "find and make use of"
  • "the two were taken captive by the native Black Rakata." The Black Rakata's article introduces them as a tribe, but the Revan article introduces them as if they're a species. Please revise.
    • added "tribe"
  • "When the Republic officer Saul Karath defected to Revan's forces, Revan eventually promoted Karath to commander of the entire Sith fleet. However, Malak ordered the Admiral to bombard the surface of the planet Telos IV with his flagship Leviathan," Is Karath the admiral? If so you should probably specify their (new?) rank in the first sentence. Braha'tok enthusiast (Hello there) 10:24, 12 June 2021 (UTC)
    • Changed to "newly-promoted Admiral". Cade StupidRepublicEmblem-Traced-TORkit.svg Calrayn 16:17, 12 June 2021 (UTC)
  • You refer to the "Emperor" when Revan and Malak encounter the guy but I'm assuming that's Vitiate? If so, I think it would be better to keep using Vitiate's name rather than just the Emperor.
    • At this point in time, the Emperor was literally *only* known as the Emperor; he discarded his older names after leaving Nathema and didn't readopt others until the events of TOR.
  • You ok with these changes? Braha'tok enthusiast (Hello there) 23:03, 12 June 2021 (UTC)
  • "Revan quickly won a string of military victories, proving himself to a capable military leader," Proving himself to whom?
    • Republic military. Fixed. Cade StupidRepublicEmblem-Traced-TORkit.svg Calrayn 15:17, 25 June 2021 (UTC)
  • "While Revan was a military genius who knew that the Republic's industrial might was the key to victory, […] "Moral shortcuts" became common under Revan and Malak's leadership, and the two Jedi developed a cold and calculating disposition unlike that of a Jedi; they matched the Mandalorians' brutal tactics with tactics just as merciless." If this is someone's point of view, that should be specified, because this feels to me like it flouts WP:NPOV a bit.
    • Cited - it comes from a lot of sources, like Warfare, but specifically the OOU Atlas and NEC.
  • You should specify that Foerost is a planet (or whatever the source says it is if the Foerost article is wrong). Braha'tok enthusiast (Hello there) 12:37, 14 June 2021 (UTC)
Soldier of the Republic
  • "He also encountered a number of the building's inhabitants, such as the former waitress Dia,[39] who told Revan about how she was hiding out to avoid a bounty set by a man named Holdan after she rejected his advances." Advances being like an attempt at romance? Does the source clarify this?
    • Sexual/romantic, yes; that's what the phrase "rejected his advances" means.
  • "Taking their journals, Revan then discovered a sealed door that Vao unlocked with her security spikes. Upon finding Zaalbar within," Found him within what? What was the door to?
    • Zaalbar was behind the door. Clarified.
  • The article reads "While exploring the sewers, " and then "Before they headed down into the sewers," when I'm pretty sure they're still in the sewer. Do you mean like "Before they continued exploring the sewers" or am I missing something? Braha'tok enthusiast (Hello there) 11:19, 26 June 2021 (UTC)
    • Ah, that meant to be "Before they headed down into the base." Fixed. Cade StupidRepublicEmblem-Traced-TORkit.svg Calrayn 18:47, 30 June 2021 (UTC)
  • "Since Revan's defeat, Malak had declared himself the new Dark Lord, taken control of the Sith Empire, and kept the Republic on the defensive." I'm assuming this is about the war in the last section, but it'd be good to clarify so to remind the reader of what already exists.
    • The change you made was fine, but I was talking about the kept the Republic on the defensive part. I should have made that more clear. Braha'tok enthusiast Hello there 15:32, 12 July 2021 (UTC)
      • Done.
  • "However, they were barred from entering the Lower City…" This situation is sorta thrown in out of nowhere. You should Introduce the fact that they were trying to reach the Lower City because Shan's pod might be there, and then mention the Sith troopers barring their entry.
  • "but the two stayed where they were and decided to intervene when the commander threatened to kill the Aqualish if he failed to cooperate. After the three Sith were killed," I'd clarify that Revan and Onasi killed them by tweaking that last clause there.
  • "Revan purchased a pazaak deck from a man named Garouk and used it to defeat a player named Niklos." I feel that context is insufficient here. My recommendation is that the last bit is worded to say he played and defeated Niklos, the unofficial pazaak champion of Taris, at a pazaak game using the purchased card deck or something along those lines. Braha'tok enthusiast Hello there 21:59, 10 July 2021 (UTC)
  • I am once again asking you to verify this copy-edit. Braha'tok enthusiast Hello there 15:32, 12 July 2021 (UTC)
Sectioning
Macaroni
Shayanomer
  • Is there any new information in this source? Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 12:12, 14 July 2021 (UTC)
    • Nope. Just a passing mention of Revan as "the Enclave's most famous student" when talking about Dantooine's Enclave. Cade StupidRepublicEmblem-Traced-TORkit.svg Calrayn 15:15, 14 July 2021 (UTC)
  • Is it possible to get a full headshot for the infobox instead of the current cropped one? Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 12:26, 2 October 2021 (UTC)

Comments


Aron Peacebringer

  • Nominated by: IFYLOFD (Talk) 01:10, 16 July 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: Was killed a couple years ago for an update tag that actually had zero new information. Injustice!
  • WookieeProject (optional):

(0 Inqs/2 Users/2 Total)

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Support

  1. JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 17:48, 4 August 2021 (UTC)
  2. Still a better love story than Twilight... Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 04:44, 8 November 2021 (UTC)

Object

Macaroni
  • All of the image sizes can be increased.
  • Ref 4 needs {{Cite web}}.
    • Some of those fields can be filled in and then the empty ones can be removed. I'm also not sure why you have |nobackup=1, the page is still live to be archived.
      • 13 years and I never really figured out templates, tbh. Hopefully this is addressed. IFYLOFD (Talk) 23:31, 19 July 2021 (UTC)
  • Please kill that relationships section. Feel free to incorporate it into P+T if you'd like.
  • Release date (full) needed for Star Wars 53.
  • 3 ABY isn't sourced correctly.
  • First paragraph of "Capture" can be split up.
  • Trust me, more to come seeing as you weren't the original writer :P JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 01:19, 16 July 2021 (UTC)
    • All should be addressed. IFYLOFD (Talk) 20:25, 18 July 2021 (UTC)
  • I don't think 2 ABY is sourced correctly either.
  • The bio only mentions that he was born in the Shiva system and neglects to mention Shiva IV as the intro/infobox do.
  • Intro should mention his species.
  • All physical traits listed in the infobox are not mentioned in the body.
  • Is there any reason he's referred to as Aron and not Peacebringer?
    • He's referred to as "Aron" earlier on because he doesn't receive the "Peacebringer" honorific until after he becomes Warlord. IFYLOFD (Talk) 01:54, 19 July 2021 (UTC)
  • "must be highly radioactive" is not exactly using past tense and can be reworded.
  • Is an article needed for these T'Syriél stormtroopers? And what about his daughter that died?
    • I don't think one is necessary for the T'Syriel stormtroopers—there's nothing to indicate they're anything different from regular stormtroopers outside of being a different species underneath the armor. Created one for the daughter. IFYLOFD (Talk) 01:54, 19 July 2021 (UTC)
  • A bit more context for each of the Rebel reinforcements would be appreciated.
  • Can you add a section header for the non-relationships bit of the P+T?
  • Missing {{Mediacat}}.
  • (Review note) There was some significant underlinking in the article, if you're planning on restoring any more old FAs you'll want to check that before nominating. JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 00:45, 19 July 2021 (UTC)
    • Rest of the objections should be good to go. IFYLOFD (Talk) 01:54, 19 July 2021 (UTC)
  • I don't think Leia should really get a relationships subsection—he was attracted to her but didn't really have a huge relationship with her.
  • Missing skills and abilities section.
  • Missing equipment section. JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 00:22, 22 July 2021 (UTC)
    • These should be addressed.
  • Does the comics companion use ABY or ASW4? If the latter, you need to explain how that corresponds to ABY, such as how it's done here.
  • Are any of the double refs really necessary?
  • A little context for the Falcon, please.
  • Lastly, the full date for the comic isn't self-sourcing; it needs a new ref. JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 21:18, 27 July 2021 (UTC)
    • I think all these should be good. IFYLOFD (Talk) 04:13, 4 August 2021 (UTC)
Shayanomer
  • Please digitize the comic book images. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 13:51, 21 September 2021 (UTC)
    • Should be done. IFYLOFD (Talk) 21:43, 3 October 2021 (UTC)
      • Infobox image should be at least 400px per Layout Guide. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 17:20, 14 October 2021 (UTC)
        • I'll be straight up with you: I don't know how to go in and resize it like that. Never been an image guy, to my shame. Any suggestions? IFYLOFD (Talk) 22:00, 25 October 2021 (UTC)
          • No need to resize, try getting a larger crop from the same source. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 07:50, 26 October 2021 (UTC)
            • So that picture of Aron is from one where he's in the background, and I wasn't really able to get a larger crop. I just swapped it out with another picture, let me know what you think. IFYLOFD (Talk) 02:02, 29 October 2021 (UTC)
  • I'm seeing space for more images, namely under "Encounter with an offworlder," "Capture," "Personality and traits," and "Skills and abilities." Usually 2 images are the norm for a 3-paragraph section (one at the beginning; one at the end for example), if there's enough space. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 09:17, 22 November 2021 (UTC)
  • Duplicate ref in Capture's last paragraph.
  • This reads as if the assailant didn't in fact miss and landed the blow. "On reaching Organa, he found that she was safe, her assailant having nearly missed her before she turned the knife against the Imperial officer."
  • Surely you can word this better to avoid the repeating the same word three times. "Peacebringer realized that Leia did not love him and never would; that realization allowed him to realize that he could live without her."
  • Context for Lando Calrissian.
  • A regular Imperial Star Destroyer I'm assuming? "However, the ball was interrupted by the arrival of an Imperial Star Destroyer in orbit."
  • Inconsistent capitalization: "warlord" and "Warlord."
  • Equipment is the first time you mention a "saber," when only "sword" is used before this. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 07:44, 29 November 2021 (UTC)
  • I personally don't like how the intro begins. Usually in formal writing, we don't need to point out a character's biggest achievement right at the start e.g. "Darth Vader was the most feared Sith Lord in the galaxy" or "Luke Skywalker was the hero of the Rebellion." This is already sitewide precedent. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 07:47, 29 November 2021 (UTC)
Manoof
  • Just check this update is ok, needed to understand that section a bit more so just did it. Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 10:38, 29 October 2021 (UTC)
    • Good to go.
  • Skills and abilities - can we mention his piloting skills? Great read! Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 10:38, 29 October 2021 (UTC)
    • Added in. Thanks for the look IFYLOFD (Talk) 01:47, 8 November 2021 (UTC)

Comments


S. V. Skynx

  • Nominated by: IFYLOFD (Talk) 01:18, 16 July 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: Love this little weird ass alien boy
  • WookieeProject (optional): WP:NOVELS

(0 Inqs/1 Users/1 Total)

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Support

  1. Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 10:05, 22 November 2021 (UTC)

Object

Erebus
  • Currently, the first Biography paragraph is a giant run-on sentence without pauses. Please fix. Erebus Chronus (Talk) 15:12, 1 August 2021 (UTC)
Macaroni
  • Date needs a new ref.
  • One last audiobook is missing.
  • Context for Obroa-skai and Rudrig?
  • Do you think we need a page for the Human History department or Department of History?
  • I think that explaining Gallandro's grudge would be helpful, if such details are available. JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 20:58, 15 August 2021 (UTC)
    • All should be addressed. Created a page for the Department of History, but don't think the other one merits it personally. IFYLOFD (Talk) 01:38, 16 August 2021 (UTC)
  • Any reason you're not mentioning the dialogue between Skynx and Solo as described in the quote of "An unexpected journey"?
    • Didn't seem relevant to me. All he's doing is describing the Queen of Ranroon, which is covered when I introduce the ship. Not every line of dialogue needs to be detailed in the body, necessarily.
  • Also not seeing anything in the body about his goodbye exchange with Solo. JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 00:47, 19 August 2021 (UTC)
  • If Cat Staggs is indeed the designer of the image as File:Professor Skynx.jpg suggests, it should be documented somewhere.
    • Done.
  • The bit about being a musician would be better suited for a "Skills and abilities" section.
    • Added.
  • There's room for an image in the P+T. JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 22:17, 3 November 2021 (UTC)
    • What do you suggest? I usually like to use photos of the character for those, but we only have the one. IFYLOFD (Talk) 05:08, 16 November 2021 (UTC)
      • Maybe one of Ruuria? In order to connect it to the P+T text, we can do something like, "Skynx was a Ruurian from the planet Ruuria (pictured)". Thoughts? JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 05:11, 16 November 2021 (UTC)
Shayanomer
  • You use both "simple-minded" and "mindless" to describe chroma-wing. These two terms mean different things.
  • Can you spell out the "Celebratus Archive" instead of using a pipelink?
  • I would rather you use an image of Han Solo that looks less "cluttered" with other things in it.
  • "Skynx's years of study made him one of the most well-known "Ximologists" in the galaxy[2] and resulted in a unique collection of artifacts..." Resulted in what? What's happening with the artifacts?
    • Still unclear. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 17:26, 24 September 2021 (UTC)
      • Not sure how it's unclear? "...his collection of a unique assortment of artifacts," He collected them. IFYLOFD (Talk) 14:44, 25 September 2021 (UTC)
        • Reworded slightly, I hope it's still accurate to the source material. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 14:54, 25 September 2021 (UTC)
          • Yup, looks good. IFYLOFD (Talk) 01:05, 27 September 2021 (UTC)
  • "Human History" can get an article of its own, seeing as we have articles on departments of organizations. "Emeritus Chair" can also get one.
  • "Skynx and his compatriots were subsequently rendered unconscious by a mysterious force and awoke in a prison cell, with the two droids gone." What is this "mysterious force"? It needs to be clarified, you're writing in an encyclopedic manner.
  • Per policy, the CSWE template should not be used in Sources. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 08:56, 14 September 2021 (UTC)
  • I would like you to reword certain bits of the article that have rather florid language, such as "While Solo was disappointed at the lack of gold and gems, it was an archaeologist's dream find...." Stuff like this doesn't fit the encyclopedic tone that we're going for. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 17:26, 24 September 2021 (UTC)
    • Listen, I understand what you're going for here, but I have to push back here. I don't think there's anything wrong with wording like that. I'm describing what it was and how it was described in the source material. We have different writing styles, but that doesn't make mine wrong, and I'm not going to rewrite the entire article because you have a different view of what an "encyclopedic" writing style is. I hate to pull this card, but I think I've been around, writing status articles, long enough to know what is and what isn't proper tone. IFYLOFD (Talk) 14:44, 25 September 2021 (UTC)
      • I never said your writing style is flat out "wrong," just that, from my point of view, the wording doesn't satisfy a neutral point of view. If you still feel strongly about your point though, I'll drop the objection. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 14:54, 25 September 2021 (UTC)
        • I have to be honest, I really do feel very strongly about it. Again, I'm not editorializing here—I'm presenting these events the way they're described in the source material. IFYLOFD (Talk) 04:28, 26 September 2021 (UTC)
Manoof
  • The quote for subsequent career mentions z'gag, can you work that in the article somewhere? Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 11:21, 29 October 2021 (UTC)
    • Done.
  • Is it worth having an equipment section (albeit a short one) describing his collection/artefacts/datatapes etc and maybe the coat he had pictured? Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 11:21, 29 October 2021 (UTC)
    • To be honest, I don't really think there's enough there. If you feel strongly about it though, I can put something small together. IFYLOFD (Talk) 01:03, 8 November 2021 (UTC)
      • Something small will suffice :) Please and thank you Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 09:56, 8 November 2021 (UTC)
        • Still not a fan of it, but it's there. IFYLOFD (Talk) 02:49, 22 November 2021 (UTC)

Comments

Jai Maruk

  • Nominated by: ToRsO bOy (talk) 12:25, 16 July 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments:
  • WookieeProject (optional):

(0 Inqs/0 Users/0 Total)

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Support

Object

Shayanomer
  • Please address the objections left over from the first nomination. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 12:56, 16 July 2021 (UTC)
    • Do I just copy the remaining objections from the previous nom here, and address them? Or should I address them on the first nom page? Thanks! ToRsO bOy (talk) 13:14, 16 July 2021 (UTC)
      • Just address them directly, and let me know here when you're done. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 13:24, 16 July 2021 (UTC)
        • Fred will have a look when he's free. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 08:05, 19 July 2021 (UTC)
  • Since you have stated that the novel does not provide the exact date, you need to write a note for it. The dates are also currently inconsistent between the infobox and body.
    • Edited the year to 19 BBY for both infobox and body. Sourced both to New Essential Chronology. ToRsO bOy (talk) 16:06, 18 July 2021 (UTC)
      • Does it mention Phindar Spaceport? Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 16:10, 18 July 2021 (UTC)
        • Yes, TNEC mentioned the spaceport. ToRsO bOy (talk) 08:00, 19 July 2021 (UTC)
          • Now that specific date is infobox-exclusive. To my understanding, we only employ rounded dates now. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 08:05, 19 July 2021 (UTC)
  • Also per the AC probation page, the audiobook is a simultaneous 1st appearance. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 09:16, 17 July 2021 (UTC)

Comments

Objections
Master Fred
  • "her apparent lack of the Force..." Is that really how the source describes it, or is it more accurately a lack of connection to the Force or Force-sensitivity
    • Edited it to "her weak connection to the the Force". ToRsO bOy (talk) 14:18, 16 July 2021 (UTC)
  • No need to mention the CSWE entry and TERC mention in the Bts' first paragraph. We don't restate the Appearances and Sources sections in the prose anymore.
  • How did you determine the proper way to handle the contradictions mentioned in the Bts? This might be worth noting for the reader. MasterFredCommerce Guild.svg(talk) 23:46, 23 February 2021 (UTC)
    • I've separated the two contradictions for easier understanding. Not sure if I'm allowed to argue why I believe one source is more believable than the other. ToRsO bOy (talk) 14:18, 16 July 2021 (UTC)
Macaroni

Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 14:28, 16 July 2021 (UTC)


Invincible

  • Nominated by: Erebus Chronus (Talk) 04:25, 1 August 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: First (technically second) FAN. Let's hope it goes well this time around
  • WookieeProject (optional): WP:TCW

(1 Inqs/4 Users/5 Total)

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Support

Great work! JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 04:59, 13 August 2021 (UTC)
  1. As leader of the clone wars project and fan of the Separatist military, I support this FAN Editoronthewiki (talk) 15:21, 14 September 2021 (UTC)
  2. Nice work. Gotta get everything from "Cat and Mouse" to status! DwartiiDelver (talk) 01:15, 17 October 2021 (UTC)
  3. Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 08:15, 6 November 2021 (UTC)
  4. Sorry for the extra objections, still looks great! JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 02:31, 19 November 2021 (UTC)
  5. Inqvote.png The Invincible Hand OOM 224 20:02, 21 November 2021 (UTC)

Object

The Macaroni
  • Tarkin audiobook is missing.
  • It seems a "Commanders and crew" section is in order per WP:LG#Starship and vehicle class articles.
  • You can discuss the concept art in the bts. JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 04:46, 1 August 2021 (UTC)
  • Not seeing a need for separate refs in infobox/body for the date. JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 03:22, 2 August 2021 (UTC)
  • Nubian is infobox-exclusive. JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 22:36, 4 August 2021 (UTC)
  • I think there's a bit too much on the Imperial stuff in the intro. It takes up more than third of the intro but much less than that in the body. JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 02:53, 13 August 2021 (UTC)
  • Sorry, was reading this and found some more. Intro: "which caused the Invincible's tracking torpedoes to destroy its bridge and therefore the vessel as well." Why would the Invincible being destroyed cause the torpedoes to destroy the stealth ship?
  • The link to Hyena-class is a redirect.
  • Fight with a Jedi and destruction: you open with "shortly thereafter", but you used that phrase just a couple sentences prior, so it gets repetitive. I think you can reword it slightly. JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 01:19, 13 October 2021 (UTC)
  • I'm not loving the current opening quote. It's a little boring, in my opinion, and a more action-y quote from the episode could be better to open up the article.
  • It's best to avoid ending and starting two consecutive sentences with the same word: "the modules that belonged to the Invincible were salvaged by Imperial defector Berch Teller. Teller then supposedly..."
  • I wouldn't really say that something's resources themselves can result in something. Maybe reword to "its resources being sought after" or something here? "...as a result of its resources..."
  • It's unclear what Trench's point is here: "despite them being in possession of such a vessel, he had had encounters with similar ships in the past." If he's saying that his experience would allow him to defeat them or something like that, it could be made a bit clearer. JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 21:04, 19 October 2021 (UTC)
    • This bit is still unclear. JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 18:35, 26 October 2021 (UTC)
      • I don't know how that could be unclear. Erebus Chronus (Talk) 19:02, 26 October 2021 (UTC)
        • Apologies, it's possible I was looking at an older revision or something. Looks better now. JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 15:21, 3 November 2021 (UTC)
    • Completely forgot to leave a message, but these should be done. However, I think the current main quote should remain since it's the only one that uses the Invincible's name in all of canon, but I can ask a member of the Inq what they might think I should do about this and get back to you on it. Erebus Chronus (Talk) 16:05, 21 October 2021 (UTC)
      • I can't deal with the rest of the objections right now, but I definitely see your point there. A larger discussion could be worth having. JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 16:13, 21 October 2021 (UTC)
  • Last couple things : do we know for sure that the blockade was exactly thirty craft? If so, how can there be at least 23 Munificents?
    • It's confirmed in Battles that Changed the Galaxy that there were 30 ships, but 23 Munificents can be seen in one of the shots from Cat and Mouse IIRC.
      • Great. In that case, 23, 6, and Invincible add up to thirty so saying at least isn't necessary. JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 17:29, 3 November 2021 (UTC)
  • Don't we have a date for the Tarkin events?
    • Added.
  • The third Legacy paragraph has some repeated phrasing; you start two sentences with "However," which can possible use some variation.
    • Fixed.
  • I promise those three are really it :P JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 16:28, 3 November 2021 (UTC)
Editor joins the battle
  • Wilhuff Tarkin needs his link added, nor is he mentioned in the history section. I think a brief sentence noting that Tarkin was informed the ship made up Teller's craft could be useful.
    • How's that?
  • The opening quote notes the ship is modular in design, so that should be noted in the description section Editoronthewiki (talk) 15:35, 1 August 2021 (UTC)
Dwartii
  • I'd imagine something about the Invincible's poster appearance in "A Distant Echo" could be added to the legacy section, perhaps even alongside an image of the poster. DwartiiDelver (talk) 23:36, 4 October 2021 (UTC)
    • I haven't translated the cover so maybe it dates it there (somehow), but can it be said that the Space Battles cover featuring the Invincible was actually created around 19 BBY (or even created following the ship's destruction)?
      • This one should have been done a week ago IIRC.
        • Space Battles was reflected in the article then, although my objection about dating the poster's creation came afterward. DwartiiDelver (talk) 01:51, 12 October 2021 (UTC)
  • Also to confirm, have you checked the TCW S2 Blu-ray's Jedi Temple Archives special features for anything on the Invincible? DwartiiDelver (talk) 02:15, 5 October 2021 (UTC)
    • Courtesy of Immi, there was nothing on Invincible except a 3D model in the Jedi Temple Archives. So, would that go into the Sources? And what would the link be? Erebus Chronus (Talk) 15:36, 15 October 2021 (UTC)
  • The speakers of the legacy section quote need to be flipped around—Tarkin says the first line and the technician the second. DwartiiDelver (talk) 02:42, 6 October 2021 (UTC)
  • "Destruction" is currently used twice in the first tRsentence of the Legacy section's second paragraph—using another word instead for one of these would be preferable if possible. DwartiiDelver (talk) 03:54, 15 October 2021 (UTC)
  • "Also" is currently used three times in the first two sentences of the Description section's second paragraph—at least one of those could be removed/replaced with another word.
    • Changed.
  • I feel "As a result" can be removed from the intro's second paragraph. DwartiiDelver (talk) 19:48, 16 October 2021 (UTC)
    • I disagree. "As a result" is valid based on how I worded the first paragraph. Erebus Chronus (Talk) 20:47, 16 October 2021 (UTC)
  • Wanted to double check before adding it myself—I'd imagine heavy laser cannon can be linked in the article? I only ask as currently that page just makes mention of them on all terrain walkers, although if the source uses "heavy laser cannon" I would assume it can be linked here as well.
  • To me at least, refs 3-8 seem as though the engines/cannons/torpedo launchers are the source of the info about them rather than CotR, considering the placement of "which states" directly after the engine/weapon names. I may just not be reading it right however. DwartiiDelver (talk) 23:15, 16 October 2021 (UTC)
OOM
  • "Capital ship" is infobox-exclusive
  • The part about Obi-Wan in the intro seems unnecessary to me. The only significant info surrounding that sentence is that the Republic retreated and the Invincible won.
    • How's that?
      • That's better OOM 224 18:11, 26 October 2021 (UTC)
  • Is the last sentence of the BTS just saying that early, incomplete animation sequences involving the ship appear in the Blu-ray? That doesn't seem at all notable to me. OOM 224 22:03, 22 October 2021 (UTC)
    • "As well as..." that doesn't mean the whole last sentence is about incomplete sequences for the episode. Erebus Chronus (Talk) 21:55, 24 October 2021 (UTC)
      • Alright, but if the "early layout" of the battle doesn't differ from the scene in the final episode, then the part about incomplete sequences isn't necessary. OOM 224 18:11, 26 October 2021 (UTC)
  • I don't think manufacturers like Nubian should be listed alongside their products in the infobox
  • The port/starboard info in the infobox ref notes aren't mentioned in the Description section
  • "adorned with Trench's personal symbol instead of the emblem of the Confederacy of Independent Systems" — compared to what other ships?
  • The intro uses "of Harch Separatist Admiral Trench" but the Commanders and crew section uses "of the Harch Separatist Admiral Trench"
  • "several years after the dreadnought's destruction" — don't see a need for this when a 19 BBY date is already specified
  • "and survived the attack" — I'd say this should be removed as it's redundant to the concept of salvaging things. I don't think it's necessary to say that the parts were salvaged "after the battle" either.
  • Would be nice to vary the language, specifically words that appear quite a few times in the article, like "later" and "after" OOM 224 18:44, 21 November 2021 (UTC)
    • Remaining objections resolved via Discord OOM 224 20:02, 21 November 2021 (UTC)
Manoof
  • Can you mix up one of the two captions at the start, they're both in the format "The X of the Invincible" Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 13:31, 29 October 2021 (UTC)
    • Changed the first one.
  • Is there a reason the Deflector shields aren't noted in the desciption? Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 13:31, 29 October 2021 (UTC)
    • Added now.
  • "While the Republic fled, Trench's T-series tactical droid, TI-99, inquired as to whether or not they should as well" is indicating TI-99 asked whether they should flee, can you clarify this. Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 13:31, 29 October 2021 (UTC)
    • Fixed. It was meant to say that TI-99 wondered if they should pursue them, don't know what happened there.
  • Great example of Theseus' paradox, is it worth mentioning a brief one-liner in the BTS? Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 13:31, 29 October 2021 (UTC)
  • Review note: I think you could potentially cut out some of the Legacy stuff regarding Teller's warship, but if you want to keep the amount you have the next two points are definitely relevant. Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 13:31, 29 October 2021 (UTC)
    • Adding new information shouldn't determine whether or not you get to keep current information if that's what I'm picking up from what you're saying.
  • Can you give context to the Gulf of Tatooine? I thought it was a location on the planet until I clicked the link. "a region of space near the planet Tatooine" or similar would suffice. Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 13:31, 29 October 2021 (UTC)
    • Added.
  • Can we get a bit more context regarding it's destruction? He was going to ambush the convoy and then just loses his ship, was it a counter-ambush or did security escort or reinforcements for the convoy defeat the ship? Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 13:31, 29 October 2021 (UTC)
  • Are the posters images that can be added to the article in the legacy section? Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 08:58, 30 October 2021 (UTC)
    • Grabbed a screenshot but because of the scene it is quite dark. I've improved it a little and sent to Erebus to check. For reference the scene is at 5:49 on D+ Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 13:20, 3 November 2021 (UTC)

Comments

  • I will address any and all possible objections when I return from vacation in 7-8 days. Erebus Chronus (Talk) 16:45, 27 August 2021 (UTC)
  • Just noticed, what poster are you referring to? JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 15:37, 14 September 2021 (UTC)


Renz

  • Nominated by: Ayrehead02 (talk) 10:07, 11 August 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: I really did not expect this to end up on the FAN but Barrie Holland apparently has a lot of stories to tell.
  • WookieeProject (optional): Wookieepedia:WookieeProject Ambition

(1 Inqs/2 Users/3 Total)

(Votes required: 2 Inqvote(s) required to reach minimum. Additional 2 user or 1 Inq vote required to pass.)

Support

  1. Great work. JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 20:26, 20 August 2021 (UTC)
  2. Inqvote.png OOM 224 21:08, 2 November 2021 (UTC)
  3. Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 09:41, 16 November 2021 (UTC)

Object

Macaroni
  • Is it really necessary to include the "Ha! Ha!" in the bts quote? It doesn't really add much in my opinion.
    • Eh I usually include that kind of thing as part of the whole quote, but removed. Ayrehead02 (talk) 22:26, 11 August 2021 (UTC)
  • Should we be listing the OT/PT graphic novels by the first movie they adapt in appearances per Forum:CT:Clarifying the Appearances section in the Layout Guide?
    • I don't think we have a consistent precedent on this, but done. Ayrehead02 (talk) 22:26, 11 August 2021 (UTC)
  • "so that Solo turned into Renz's gun" -- this implies that Solo literally transformed into a gun, which is not what I think you're trying to say.
  • Endor Limited is missing a release year, and it was not produced by WotC :P
  • Can you please give the series name and full release date for the De Agostini book? JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 21:06, 11 August 2021 (UTC)
    • Damn, I generally just auto-assume De Agostini full dates are impossible, I forgot that Encyclopedia actually has them. Ayrehead02 (talk) 22:26, 11 August 2021 (UTC)
  • Do we have/need a page for the Endor bunker garrison?
    • Made one, although the precedent for when a garrison does or doesn't get a page seems a little spotty. Ayrehead02 (talk) 09:43, 17 August 2021 (UTC)
  • Is the capitalization of Rebel in the opening quote accurate?
  • The "Duped by Solo" quote caption doesn't make it clear who the second speaker is.
  • Do you think a year for Eye of the Needle is worth adding? JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 00:00, 17 August 2021 (UTC)
    • I left it out mostly because I don't really see how the year is relevant to the character Renz, all we need to know is that Holland and Marquand met on the film prior to Holland being offered Renz which is clear in the text. Ayrehead02 (talk) 09:43, 17 August 2021 (UTC)
Manoof
  • Capturing Rebels- can the first part of the sentence be referenced to Jedi as well as the point of his superior? Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 12:22, 4 November 2021 (UTC)
  • A Great Line - In the quote, please note [sic] at the start with the grammatical error Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 12:22, 4 November 2021 (UTC)
  • Can you note that the role was not credited? Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 12:22, 4 November 2021 (UTC)
  • In "A complicated scene", Holland notes he believes his portrayal of Renz to be "a forceful officer whose ruthless manner summed up the power of the Empire.". Can we incorporate any of that in the P&T based on the character's behaviour, perhaps speaking to his dedication and loyalty to the empire? Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 12:22, 4 November 2021 (UTC)
    • I'd rather leave the actors interpretation in the BTS and avoid trying to extrapolate stuff for the P&T from it. Since he only has one line I don't think we can really say much more that what's currently there. Ayrehead02 (talk) 18:47, 15 November 2021 (UTC)
  • Is Category:Endorians adequate here? Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 12:22, 4 November 2021 (UTC)
    • I don't think being stationed on Endor is really enough to count him as an Endorian, and for all we know he shipped out to sleep on the Death Star every night or something. Ayrehead02 (talk) 18:47, 15 November 2021 (UTC)

Comments

Flame-colored robes

  • Nominated by: Minnabird Naboo.svg (talk) 18:03, 11 August 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments:
  • WookieeProject (optional): WP:NOVELS

(0 Inqs/5 Users/5 Total)

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Support

  1. Objections, suggestions, and a lot of screaming about Padmé and Naboo fashion addressed via Discord. Immi Thrax RainbowRebellion2.png (talk) 23:57, 15 August 2021 (UTC)
  2. Great work! Editoronthewiki (talk) 21:54, 10 September 2021 (UTC)
  3. I think we're ready to go. Fantastic section header names. JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 00:41, 15 September 2021 (UTC)
  4. YakovChaimTzvi (he/him/his) ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol.svg (talk) 02:08, 7 November 2021 (UTC)
  5. Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 09:25, 27 November 2021 (UTC)

Object

Macaroni
  • Really great work here, just a couple things: for one, it isn't super clear to me if "The handmaidens often wore hoods" is connected to the article subject. If that's the case, it can be made a little clearer.
  • "..." should be replaced with "…"
  • When you say Parasitti used the disguise against her, I think it should be explicitly mentioned that when she shapeshifted into a handmaiden, she was disguised in the robes. The article kind of implies it right now but doesn't state it.
    • Hopefully a little clearer in that last sentence Minnabird Naboo.svg (talk) 07:35, 14 August 2021 (UTC)
  • "All over the galaxy" is intro-exclusive.
    • Changed the statement in the intro to better reflect what is written in the section on the pin-up Minnabird Naboo.svg (talk) 07:35, 14 August 2021 (UTC)
  • "At least one other queen's retinue also wore similar robes." — It should be made clear that this retinue was also of the Royal House of Naboo. JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 18:40, 12 August 2021 (UTC)
  • Context needed for Anakin.
  • Any reason you didn't mention a date for Raiders of the Lost Gundark?
    • Popping my head in to note there's no available date, just a range of "sometime while she's queen." Immi Thrax RainbowRebellion2.png (talk) 00:01, 11 September 2021 (UTC)
      • This - can't give anything more specific than what's already there. Minnabird Naboo.svg (talk) 01:06, 12 September 2021 (UTC)
  • All of the stuff in "Remembered in light" takes place before the last paragraph of "Banked embers", so that needs to be re-ordered. JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 22:39, 10 September 2021 (UTC)
    • Rearranged sections in chronological order - sorry, instinctively arranged by theme after the original structure broke down. Minnabird Naboo.svg (talk) 01:06, 12 September 2021 (UTC)
Lewis
  • Missing appearances, I pointed them out to you on the Discord server before and guessing you forgot to add them Lewisr (talk) 16:31, 13 August 2021 (UTC)
    • Should be addressed now! Thank you. Minnabird Naboo.svg (talk) 01:02, 25 August 2021 (UTC)
Manoof
  • There's two purposes in the intro not noted in the infobox: "complement several of the queen's outfits and help the handmaidens fade to the background." Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 12:52, 4 November 2021 (UTC)
    • This one's easy enough to fix, sorry. Minnabird Naboo.svg (talk) 21:08, 26 November 2021 (UTC)
  • Does the robe have red in it? Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 12:52, 4 November 2021 (UTC)
    • Will tackle the other objection later but: I suspect where you're seeing red is the under-robe and sash. They're described variously as red and orange in secondary material iirc but since the in-universe references call them orange, I've opted for that. It seems to be such a hot red-orange that simply categorizing as one or the other is kind of trusting your perceptions and throwing a dart. Minnabird Naboo.svg (talk) 13:28, 4 November 2021 (UTC)
Shayanomer

Comments

  • Grew too big for GAN! Minnabird Naboo.svg (talk) 18:03, 11 August 2021 (UTC)

Vote to remove nomination (Inq only)

  1. Inqvote.png Until Minna could return and handle objections herself again, removing for Manoof's objection that has been left unaddressed for over three weeks. OOM 224 18:58, 26 November 2021 (UTC)
  2. Inqvote.png Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 19:04, 26 November 2021 (UTC)


Belaya

(1 Inqs/4 Users/5 Total)

(Votes required: 2 Inqvote(s) required to reach minimum. No additional votes required to pass, please consider reviewing another article.)

Support

  1. Inqvote.png OOM 224 20:03, 24 August 2021 (UTC)
  2. D MCCG D MCCG.png (chat) 16:03, 4 September 2021 (UTC)
  3. Perfection.gif great work! Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 09:46, 16 September 2021 (UTC)
  4. Great work! JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 22:44, 23 September 2021 (UTC)
  5. Chef's kiss! -- YakovChaimTzvi (he/him/his) ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol.svg (talk) 15:35, 28 October 2021 (UTC)

Object

OOM
  • It's best to establish context for subjects upon their first mention so as to avoid confusion further down the page. Specifically, Dantooine as a planet and Revan as a former Jedi in the first lines of the first and third paragraph (intro), respectively.
    • Impactic and Immi have tackled that, and some other context left out previously. Please see if we've added too much context or if more is still needed!
      • Looks good, though I think it is a little too much. The first sentence about Revan can be removed since there's no need to mention Revan at that point in the article (since it's not relevant to Belaya). I've also cut down on the context here, please see if that's okay OOM 224 12:06, 21 August 2021 (UTC)
        • Dialed back! Does that now leave the last sentence in a weird place by calling Malak "his former Sith apprentice"? Immi Thrax RainbowRebellion2.png (talk) 12:23, 21 August 2021 (UTC)
          • That can be solved by simply saying that he's a Sith OOM 224 13:00, 21 August 2021 (UTC)
  • "Although" is preferred over "though" in formal writing
    • Fixed by Impactic.
  • Per precedence, the video game developer (BioWare in this case) should be mentioned in BTS sections OOM 224 19:00, 20 August 2021 (UTC)
  • Also (following on my first objection. This objection got longer than I thought it would, but bear with me here :P), I'm not sure if so much context on the Jedi Civil War is needed in "Traditions of the Jedi." I suggest first removing the part between "In 3956 BBY" and "Bastila Shan brought Revan," and then adding the necessary context that Revan lost his memories of his past self and was captured by the Jedi; I'd say only those two bits of info are needed since the rest aren't required for 1) Belaya as an article or 2) making the text here clear to readers OOM 224 12:06, 21 August 2021 (UTC)
  • Context needed for Deesra Luur Jada. Something like "Jedi Knight" would do fine. Similarly, context is needed for Korriban
  • Is there a reason why the Masters in that Deesra sentence are listed in the current order? If not then it's best to just sort them alphabetically.
    • Added context. I think the order of the Masters was how they were standing in the Enclave from left to right, but I went ahead and ordered them alphabetically. Wasn't sure to order by first name or last, if I did it wrong just ping me on discord and I can fix it. Jedi Order.svg ImpacticForce (Talk) 16:11, 22 August 2021 (UTC)
      • Cool, and no, what you've done is correct OOM 224 16:40, 22 August 2021 (UTC)
  • Is it really unclear whom Gaider is referring too? I'd say it's fair to assume it to be Belaya. Plus, the page is already indicating this by talking about it :P OOM 224 11:34, 22 August 2021 (UTC)
    • I changed it for now, but I'll check with Immi later, it'll probably get rewritten a little bit. Jedi Order.svg ImpacticForce (Talk) 20:07, 22 August 2021 (UTC)
      • Cool, I've also made an edit to that part. There's also the potential of having that as a {{Quote}} but yeah, I'll let you check with Immi first. OOM 224 20:21, 22 August 2021 (UTC)
  • Instead of repeating information between both the Biography and the P&T sections, I suggest removing Belaya's species from the Biography
  • Context for Bastila. Not sure what her rank was at the time, but either Jedi Knight or Master would do fine
    • Removed species from the Biography. The council refers to Bastila as a padawan in the game. Jedi Order.svg ImpacticForce (Talk) 17:36, 22 August 2021 (UTC)
      • Huh, you'd think that the NPC Jedi protagonist of a game titled Knights of the Old Republic would be at least a Jedi Knight :P OOM 224 18:02, 22 August 2021 (UTC)
  • "She expressed disbelief that someone so strong […]" It's not immediately clear who "she" is—Bastila or Belaya. Also, that same line is a little "choppy"—it's not really connected to the surrounding sentences. As an example, I've joined the "many nights alone together" sentence here with the previous line for a better flow.
  • "After Revan correctly recited the Jedi Code, he constructed his own lightsaber with a crystal from Master Dorak" — I don't think this is necessary since it's solely about Revan's journey OOM 224 17:13, 22 August 2021 (UTC)
    • I've revised the Crystal Cave part to focus on Belaya commenting on it. Should we leave any mention of the Jedi Code part to the BTS? I don't believe it's canonically established who re-taught Revan the Jedi Code, so it doesn't really fit the "100% completion" template, and IIRC the dialogue isn't available once someone else has taught it (but we can test that to find out) Immi Thrax RainbowRebellion2.png (talk) 00:04, 23 August 2021 (UTC)
      • I think it's fine the way it is, since it's just a game mechanic that technically falls under "Gameplay alternatives" OOM 224 17:32, 23 August 2021 (UTC)
  • "The fallen Jedi"
    • Some of the detail in the first paragraph, bar the last sentence, can be cut to summarise that Juhani fell and the resulting effects
    • "rumors circulated that local settlers had been attacked by the newly aggressive wildlife, a Jedi apprentice had hurt her own master, and Master Quatra may not survive her injuries" I know I say this a lot, but I don't think this context here is necessary either OOM 224 18:02, 22 August 2021 (UTC)
      • Worked on the paragraphs, let me know if I need to re-add or remove any context. Jedi Order.svg ImpacticForce (Talk) 20:04, 22 August 2021 (UTC)
        • Looks good. OOM 224 20:21, 22 August 2021 (UTC)
  • Okay, time for the final push
    • I don't think "After Revan located a Star Map within the ruins" is necessary information
      • Removed!
    • For the last Bio paragraph, simply saying that 1) the Enclave was bombarded by the Sith, 2) there were many Jedi casualties, 3) Malak was defeated by Revan, and 4) the First Jedi purge resulted in the deaths of most Order members is enough. Further details aren't needed since all the readers need here is a brief overview on the potential effects of the war on Belaya.
      • How's it now?
        • Looking great! There's only one thing with that last sentence: the First Jedi Purge isn't really part of the Sith Civil War. They're concurrent and certainly related, but the Sith killing Jedi was separate from their own struggle for dominance over each other OOM 224 19:15, 24 August 2021 (UTC)
    • It's pretty clear that "Peter T." is Peter Thomas, so I'd just replace "and notes from "Peter T." are found" with "whose notes are found"
      • Revised!
    • Lastly, I jsut want to confirm if the Prima's Guide been checked for any additional info OOM 224 18:03, 24 August 2021 (UTC)
      • Yep! Entirety of the Prima mention: "The courtyard is populated by a few Jedi and by Belaya, who comments on your progress as you learn the ways of the Force. (She’s a friend of Juhani, whom you’ll meet later, and she leaves the courtyard forever if Juhani meets an untimely end.)" Since none of that is unique info, we didn't cite it. Immi Thrax RainbowRebellion2.png (talk) 18:44, 24 August 2021 (UTC)
Macaroni
  • I'm not a huge fan of having no section header for the first bts paragraph. What do you think about adding one?
  • I think "Authorial intent" could use a paragraph break and a quote.
    • Addressed both BTS-related objections. Related to the below, adjusted image positioning as well. Immi Thrax RainbowRebellion2.png (talk) 01:19, 7 September 2021 (UTC)
  • The last two paragraphs of the bio are quite small and only work because of the huge image, which is a bit distracting. I'd say it can be a bit smaller and the last paragraphs merged. JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 00:05, 7 September 2021 (UTC)
    • Merged the paragraphs. The picture's size might need to be adjusted a little more. Jedi Order.svg ImpacticForce (Talk) 00:42, 7 September 2021 (UTC)
  • I don't really understand saying "In the time of [...] Revan" -- what are you trying to say here about the timeline that isn't already said? JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 20:15, 14 September 2021 (UTC)
    • My fault for using a phrasing from the CSWE: "A human Jedi who trained under Master Zhar Lestin in the time of Darth Revan, she was friends with Juhani." I took that to mean that the years of her training overlapped with the years that Revan was active as a Sith. Does the dating already convey that? Revise or remove? Immi Thrax RainbowRebellion2.png (talk) 10:25, 15 September 2021 (UTC)
    • Check out the revision, and if it's still not working, we'll trim :) Immi Thrax RainbowRebellion2.png (talk) 21:05, 15 September 2021 (UTC)
Manoof
  • In the last paragraph of "The Fallen Jedi", is it worth noting that Bastila likewise couldn't assist? It's been ages since I played the game so I can't remember if she was available as a party member or not.
    • Revised the wording to include Bastila and be more clear about the instruction—Zhar says "None of the other Jedi at the academy are permitted to help you in this task" and Bastila can't be used as a party member for it. Is that good? Immi Thrax RainbowRebellion2.png (talk) 20:31, 14 September 2021 (UTC)
      • Perfection Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 09:54, 15 September 2021 (UTC)
  • The first sentence of "The third trial" is really short, and jumps straight to Revan defeating her. Are you able to expand the initial sentence slightly and mention that they battled? Were any warning words said or was this an ambush strike? Can we say they used lightsabers and force powers or is that a stretch given the context of the game?
    • Revised wording! Didn't add details, both for gameplay reasons (you could choose not to use lightsaber or Force powers) and because it'd go off the topic of Belaya herself. Immi Thrax RainbowRebellion2.png (talk) 20:31, 14 September 2021 (UTC)
      • Awesome that's much better, agree with that Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 09:54, 15 September 2021 (UTC)
  • Same section, I'm not sure the last two sentences are needed. I'll keep looking but no other issues spotted so far! Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 13:15, 14 September 2021 (UTC)
    • We feel they're needed since Belaya was based on Dantooine; it's relevant to note what happened to Dantooine as it would have affected her (whether or not she was present, whether or not she survived...), as would the Jedi purge (if she survived the Dantooine bombardment). We believe those events need to be mentioned while avoiding out-of-universe speculating about the unknowns (so no "her fate was unknown"). Would you like us to revise the sentences in some other way? Immi Thrax RainbowRebellion2.png (talk) 20:31, 14 September 2021 (UTC)
      • That makes sense, can we at least connect Belaya in there somehow. Eg Juhani left Belaya to join Revan... Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 09:54, 15 September 2021 (UTC)
        • Connected! Immi Thrax RainbowRebellion2.png (talk) 21:05, 15 September 2021 (UTC)
          • I had the Lego click sound pop in my head when I read that haha Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 09:46, 16 September 2021 (UTC)
  • Oh, forgot to mention you should double check the categories and see if there's anything else that could be added. I usually go into each existing category and see if there's sub or parent categories that offer a separate category branch that could also apply. For example, I went up the Jedi Knights of the Jedi Order and found under the Jedi individuals category another branch that could apply: Category:Jedi Guardians Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 13:20, 14 September 2021 (UTC)
    • I added Category:Jedi Guardians. I didn't see any other applicable categories, but I'll be on the lookout. Jedi Order.svg ImpacticForce (Talk) 16:10, 14 September 2021 (UTC)
      • Having a look in the wider individuals category, can we categorise her as a dantooinian as an inhabitant of that planet? Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 09:54, 15 September 2021 (UTC)
  • Can we describe her hairstyle at all in P&T? Review complete :) Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 09:54, 15 September 2021 (UTC)
    • Initially I thought that category was only for those who were native to it, but it appears to apply to any people who lived on the planet. Added. Jedi Order.svg ImpacticForce (Talk) 15:25, 15 September 2021 (UTC)
    • Whoops forgot to address the hairstyle. Fixed. Jedi Order.svg ImpacticForce (Talk) 17:34, 15 September 2021 (UTC)

Comments

  • Belaya is part of the scope of WP:PRIDE's project based on the strong subtext that she had romantic feelings for Juhani, but at the moment, she has not been placed in the Category:LGBTQ+ individuals category since it's tricky to judge how explicit that needs to be for a potential status article. I've been unable to find any interviews where it's clear that Belaya is being discussed, though David Gaider said years later of Juhani: "We kind of hid it. She never says, 'She was my lover.' She just says, 'We are very close.'" (I don't think he quite remembered what Juhani did or didn't say, and it isn't totally clear if this is meant to be Belaya or Quatra). For what it's worth, I thought it was obvious and many people have felt that way about her since we're used to having things implied, in subtext, coded, etc., particularly since KOTOR was released in 2003 and it was doing groundbreaking-but-very-carefully stuff with Juhani. How do reviewers feel about that category for Belaya? Immi Thrax RainbowRebellion2.png (talk) 04:28, 14 August 2021 (UTC)
    • Upon further research (I'm talking a Google cache of an archive/mirror of the defunct LucasForums, eventually leading to finding the Archive.org of that forum!), we found David Gaider made explicit the authorial intent that Belaya was Juhani's former lover. This has been quote in the BTS, not incorporated into the IU sections. I also found video of the conference panel to transcribe a more accurate quote. Based on this OOU confirmation of what was implied IU, we've confidently placed Belaya in the category. Immi Thrax RainbowRebellion2.png (talk) 22:08, 15 August 2021 (UTC)


Atrisi system

(2 Inqs/4 Users/6 Total)

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Support

  1. The Artisinal system. JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 17:39, 27 August 2021 (UTC)
  2. Inqvote.png Carrying vote over from the GAN after reviewing the changes. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 12:34, 2 October 2021 (UTC)
  3. LucaRoR CIS roundel.svg (Talk) 16:40, 6 November 2021 (UTC)
  4. Systems online Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 08:09, 7 November 2021 (UTC)
  5. Liverpool92Ackbar HS.jpg 02:25, 9 November 2021 (UTC)
  6. Inqvote.png OOM 224 22:47, 11 November 2021 (UTC)

Object

Manoof
  • Given the image shows "Kitel Phard" rather than "Atrisi system", is it worth noting in brackets the alternate name for the system's planet in the infobox to reduce confusion? Similar to an image caption? Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 13:02, 6 November 2021 (UTC)

Comments

  • More a comment than an objection, since the system is also known as Kitel Phard System, shouldn't it be bolded in the intro? LucaRoR CIS roundel.svg (Talk) 16:24, 6 November 2021 (UTC)
    • Nope, names from the Appendix generally don't override existing names, so we're not treating "Kitel Phard system" as a in-universe name. Imperators II(Talk) 16:32, 6 November 2021 (UTC)
      • Ah, yeah, forgot about that, sorry. :P LucaRoR CIS roundel.svg (Talk) 16:40, 6 November 2021 (UTC)


Suljo Warde

  • Nominated by: VergenceScatter (talk) 01:16, 1 September 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: First one, let's hope this goes well. Thanks to everyone who's helped me to get to the point that I feel confident enough to do this.
  • WookieeProject (optional): WP:FFGAMES

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  1. Happy to cast a support vote! Good work :) -- YakovChaimTzvi (he/him/his) ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol.svg (talk) 15:59, 28 October 2021 (UTC)

Object

Liverpool92
  • "Human" and "Male" or any other use of gender should be lowercase.--Liverpool92Ackbar HS.jpg 14:47, 7 September 2021 (UTC)
    • "Human" is always capitalized in legends, but I've fixed the "male." VergenceScatter (talk) 19:43, 7 September 2021 (UTC)
Fan
  • Is "Assassins" meant to be capitalised in the intro? Fan26 (Talk) 14:08, 21 September 2021 (UTC)
  • "Warde, who would later save Marcolf’s life in return, believed that Marcolf, a Force-sensitive, had the potential to join the Jedi Order, so he brought the Mirialan with him to the planet Arbooine—where Warde had been laying the groundwork for a Republic outpost—with plans to eventually bring him to Coruscant[1], the capital of the Republic." This is a run-on, please rectify. Fan26 (Talk) 23:41, 21 September 2021 (UTC)
CC-8
  • Context for Eriadu in the intro
  • The Republic seems like it could go in the infobox
  • Two of the quotes are missing punctuation
  • Images generally look better when they're placed below quotes, and doing it that way is more consistent with our other status articles
  • The Cato Neimoidia section should have another subsection rather than just one Commander Code-8 Hello There! 06:24, 26 September 2021 (UTC)
Macaroni
  • I count three one-paragraph sections. How would you feel about merging some of them? JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 14:53, 26 October 2021 (UTC)
    • Hmm, the problem is that doing so would prevent me from including the quotes that are in those sections. Do you think it's worth combining those sections if I have to get rid of the quotes? VergenceScatter (talk) 18:11, 26 October 2021 (UTC)
      • If that's the only reason not to, then absolutely. Quotes are added if sectioning allows, not the other way around. JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 18:18, 26 October 2021 (UTC)
        • "Early life" and "Clone Wars" can easily be merged into something like "Early life and Clone Wars."
          • Done. Sorry about the wait, misread the message chain. VergenceScatter (talk) 19:38, 15 November 2021 (UTC)
  • We should avoid placing images next to consecutive paragraphs.
    • I'm going to disagree here. I believe all of the image placement on the article is fine. VergenceScatter (talk) 18:33, 8 November 2021 (UTC)
  • "Skills and abilities" has a one-sentence paragraph. I think that section can be two paragraphs, but they should be of around equal length.
    • Done;
  • Bts needs some more subsectioning. JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 18:27, 28 October 2021 (UTC)

Comments

  • Note that Chronicles uses "Moraband" throughout, so I've elected to use that name in the article instead of "Korriban." VergenceScatter (talk) 22:39, 4 September 2021 (UTC)


Unidentified First Order stormtrooper sergeant

  • Nominated by: Liverpool92Ackbar HS.jpg 15:06, 1 September 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: First FAN.
  • WookieeProject (optional): WP:GE

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  1. YakovChaimTzvi (he/him/his) ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol.svg (talk) 15:09, 31 October 2021 (UTC)

Object

Vergence
  • Any way you can add a "Skills and abilities" section? VergenceScatter (talk) 16:15, 8 September 2021 (UTC)
    • Done. Added as much as i could which wasn't much.--Liverpool92Ackbar HS.jpg 10:45, 11 September 2021 (UTC)
Yakov, Sergeant Tzvi
  • The second intro paragraph has confusing sentence structure. I had trouble parsing the grammar of its second-last sentence.
  • You should clarify that "Red Fury" and "709th Legion" are the same.
  • Who is Io? -- YakovChaimTzvi (he/him/his) ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol.svg (talk) 04:59, 30 October 2021 (UTC)

Comments

Tobler Ceel/Legends

(0 Inqs/2 Users/2 Total)

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Support

  1. I Cee that CC has new FANs. JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 00:44, 4 October 2021 (UTC)
  2. It's over Trade Federation! I have the high ground! (Provided you're okay with this edit!) VergenceScatter (talk) 02:39, 9 November 2021 (UTC)

Object

Fan
  • I think there's room for one related image, like Jar Jar or the control ship. Fan26 (Talk) 03:22, 21 September 2021 (UTC)
Macaroni
  • {{ForceCollection}} needs to be implemented.
  • Got a couple of dup links.
  • Is the ref at the end of the first "The heat of battle" paragraph intended to be to the film and not the novel? If so, that paragraph has duplicate references.
  • Seems like you're missing a word here: "...ordered the activation the shield generators."
  • A little more context on Anakin accidentally joining Bravo Flight would be appreciated, it's kind of unclear what that's supposed to mean right now.
  • On top of that, Anakin needs context for himself.
  • I'd recommend removing one of the instances of the word "general" from here, it could be confusing which general is which: "A majority of the Gungans were not able to escape, including the general, who was taken prisoner on the battlefield and held near the other officers, including General Binks."
  • P+T also has duplicate refs.
  • A little context on Chronicles? JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 21:09, 23 September 2021 (UTC)
    • That should be everything, I've added context for Anakin and actually removed the parts about Bravo Flight, since it's not especialy relevant to the article topic Commander Code-8 Hello There! 06:05, 26 September 2021 (UTC)

Comments

New Centrif

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  1. YakovChaimTzvi (he/him/his) ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol.svg (talk) 02:07, 7 November 2021 (UTC)

Object

New ChaimTzvi
  • Two small objections: I'd change "the Human Naboo" to "the Human Naboo people".
  • I'd split the first sentence of "History" or otherwise reword "in order to prevent ... were targeted first" to "they targeted ... to prevent ...". Other than those things, great. -- YakovChaimTzvi (he/him/his) ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol.svg (talk) 05:12, 30 October 2021 (UTC)
OOM
  • "Toward" is preferred over "towards" in formal writing
    • Done
  • "eight battle droids, four heavy beetle droids, and two Single Trooper Aerial Platforms" — since STAPs were manned by B1s, are the pilots amongst the "eight battle droids" mentioned? OOM 224 21:51, 14 November 2021 (UTC)
    • The pilots aren't counted but I'm not convinced they should be, we wouldn't go out of our way to specify that the TIE Fighters at Yavin were manned by Imperial pilots for example. For the record the beetle droids are manned by B1s too. Commander Code-8 Hello There! 11:09, 23 November 2021 (UTC)
      • Ah okay, your reasoning makes sense, but it still needs to be clarified to readers that those mounts were operated separate from the aforementioned battle droid infantrymen. As the sentence is now, I'm thinking of it as if it says "eight soldiers, four cars, and two bikes," where some of the soldiers are potentially the ones on the vehicles rather than being on foot. Perhaps it would be better to say something like "eight battle droids, four heavy beetle droid units, and two Single Trooper Aerial Platform units"? OOM 224 17:29, 25 November 2021 (UTC)

Comments

Jay

  • Nominated by: YakovChaimTzvi (he/him/his) ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol.svg (talk) 15:27, 27 September 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: YEET FIRST VISIONS SAN LEGGO. Don’t read this article until you watch “Tatooine Rhapsody” 🙂.
  • WookieeProject (optional):

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  1. Inqvote.png First vote on a Visions nom! Supreme Emperor Holocomm 23:45, 9 November 2021 (UTC)

Object

Luca
  • Guitar can be linked in the intro. (And then changed when a bot moves the page).
  • In the body, Star Waver is written between ", while in the intro it isn't. Which is correct?
  • In the second paragraph, guitar links to the legends page. You should link it to the canon page and then remove the link from the Equipment section.
  • Context for Lan?
  • It is probably better to specify that they played a song before the crowd roared.
  • In P&T, you should describe his physical appearance.
  • You could most likely link "Money".
  • In P&A, is it worth mentioning the fact that he could use a lightsaber? Also, a quote from K-344 saying that he was useful with the repairs wouldn't hurt. Last thing, we usually avoid making a one-sentence-long paragraph.
    • I put the lightsaber under equipment. Do you think it should still be under powers and abilities? — YakovChaimTzvi (he/him/his) ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol.svg (talk) 20:01, 10 October 2021 (UTC)
      • I was thinking about something like this. Mentioning that he owned a lightsaber, and that he could use it. I'm not sure, however, if he has ever used it in the episode. LucaRoR CIS roundel.svg (Talk) 05:51, 11 October 2021 (UTC)
    • I’ll find the K-344 quote and add it later, and also fix the one-sentence paragraph. — YakovChaimTzvi (he/him/his) ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol.svg (talk) 20:01, 10 October 2021 (UTC)
      • I fixed the one-sentence paragraph. -- YakovChaimTzvi (he/him/his) ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol.svg (talk) 18:50, 11 October 2021 (UTC)
        • It's just missing the quote, then I'll strike the objection. LucaRoR CIS roundel.svg (Talk) 19:20, 11 October 2021 (UTC)
          • Added! Thanks for all the helpful feedback! :D -- YakovChaimTzvi (he/him/his) ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol.svg (talk) 19:30, 11 October 2021 (UTC)
  • In the Equipment section, the fact that he could play guitar feels out of place. You have already mentioned it in the P&A section: I'd just remove it…
    • Corrigendum: I would leave the fact that he owned a guitar there. (JocastaBot please forgive this subsection :P) LucaRoR CIS roundel.svg (Talk) 05:51, 11 October 2021 (UTC)
    • Okay, I did it. -- YakovChaimTzvi (he/him/his) ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol.svg (talk) 18:50, 11 October 2021 (UTC)
  • In the BTS, the date of release should be given to the episode. LucaRoR CIS roundel.svg (Talk) 14:22, 10 October 2021 (UTC)
    • Added. Thanks for the review! I’ll get to the rest later. — YakovChaimTzvi (he/him/his) ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol.svg (talk) 19:52, 10 October 2021 (UTC)
      • The full date can't be directly referenced to the episode itself. LucaRoR CIS roundel.svg (Talk) 05:51, 11 October 2021 (UTC)
  • Gamorrean is currently quote-exclusive. Maybe something like: "His lightsaber was damaged when he fell into Geezer's vehicle, after which he used it as a microphone. The microphone was later misunderstood for a weapon by some Gamorrean guards." Feel free to word it differently, this is the best I could do. :P
  • You could probably create a Microphone page…
  • To make everything uniform, you could decide a way of writing lightsaber-microphone and use the same every time you mention it. LucaRoR CIS roundel.svg (Talk) 05:51, 11 October 2021 (UTC)
    • I standardized it except in the image caption, where I use "microphone lightsaber" (and in the body I use "microphone/lightsaber"). I did this intentionally, but if you insist, I'll add the slash to the image caption as well. -- YakovChaimTzvi (he/him/his) ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol.svg (talk) 18:50, 11 October 2021 (UTC)
      • Nah, it looks good to me. LucaRoR CIS roundel.svg (Talk) 19:20, 11 October 2021 (UTC)
  • "From violence to vocal" is a nice word pun, but I think it should be changed, since we try to keep our writing as formal as possible. LucaRoR CIS roundel.svg (Talk) 12:47, 20 November 2021 (UTC)
    • Struck per Discord conversation. LucaRoR CIS roundel.svg (Talk) 18:38, 22 November 2021 (UTC)
Dent
  • There are multiple articles on individuals with the first name Jay. There should be a disambiguation page for them linked at the top of this article. Dentface (talk) 08:09, 11 October 2021 (UTC)
    • Created... and wow, there are a lot of "Jays". I'm adding more. -- YakovChaimTzvi (he/him/his) ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol.svg (talk) 17:59, 11 October 2021 (UTC)
    • Update-- I think I got all of them... -- YakovChaimTzvi (he/him/his) ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol.svg (talk) 18:50, 11 October 2021 (UTC)
  • The Filmmaker Focus links you have on the article should be going to the individual article for that Filmmaker Focus episode, not the series page overall - in this case, Tatooine Rhapsody (Filmmaker Focus). Since it's a redlink, an article for that episode will need to be created. Dentface (talk) 01:10, 12 October 2021 (UTC)
    • I’m not opposed to doing that, but last I remember, people on the Discord seemed to agree we only needed one “filmmaker focus” page. — YakovChaimTzvi (he/him/his) ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol.svg (talk) 03:43, 12 October 2021 (UTC)
      • Okay, in that case, leave it. I was going off of the fact that on the Filmmaker Focus page itself, there were redlinks. Thanks! Dentface (talk) 04:08, 12 October 2021 (UTC)
        • I did summarize the featurette on the "Filmmaker Focus" page, and linked the appropriate section in the reference notes and "Sources" section of Jay. -- YakovChaimTzvi (he/him/his) ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol.svg (talk) 19:33, 12 October 2021 (UTC)
Editor
  • You need to include the scene where the band greets Geezer on Tatooine before their song in the history section
  • I think the Gamorrean guards getting confused about his lightsaber should be recounted in the history section Editoronthewiki (talk) 16:56, 20 October 2021 (UTC)
    • Done and done! Thanks homie -- YakovChaimTzvi (he/him/his) ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol.svg (talk) 17:53, 20 October 2021 (UTC)
  • Information from episode guide gallery needs to be added. Stuff like his hair being shaggy and him running from the Clone Wars's carnage Editoronthewiki (talk) 04:03, 22 November 2021 (UTC)
Shayanomer
  • Article makes no mention of Jay appearing in a trailer prior to the episode's release. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 09:19, 10 November 2021 (UTC)

Comments

  • Special thanks to Editoronthewiki for helping get this article to the word count and expanding the biography, and to Supreme Emperor for adding the first image! — YakovChaimTzvi (he/him/his) ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol.svg (talk) 15:27, 27 September 2021 (UTC)
  • I'm wondering if the current last paragraph of BTS is necessary.YakovChaimTzvi (he/him/his) ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol.svg (talk) 13:30, 16 October 2021 (UTC)


Oseon 2795

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Support

  1. Great work, as usual :P JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 18:20, 8 October 2021 (UTC)
  2. Inqvote.png OOM 224 22:38, 22 November 2021 (UTC)

Object

Macaroni
  • Is it intentional to not link air conditioner?
    • Yes—I didn't know it existed. :P Thanks.
  • I'm a little confused by the date ref, which says that TERC dates the series to 3 BBY–2 BBY instead of "around 3 BBY" like the article says. I'm guessing there's a reason for that? JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 18:06, 8 October 2021 (UTC)
    • The BTS explicitly says that Oseon 2795 is the setting of the opening scene of the first book of the trilogy. Since the trilogy is established to span from 3 BBY to 2 BBY, 2795 must be set in 3 BBY.
      • Got it.
  • The intro also says in 3 BBY vs "around" in the body. JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 18:10, 8 October 2021 (UTC)
    • The body says no such thing—it says "in 3 BBY" PLUS "around the same time [as Osuno Whett was doing his thing]". Imperators II(Talk) 18:18, 8 October 2021 (UTC)

Comments

S.T. Bende

  • Nominated by: Dentface (talk) 18:45, 16 October 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: First FAN! Let's hope this goes well...
  • WookieeProject (optional): WP:NOVELS

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  1. Great work!! I can't even imagine doing something so comprehensive about an author or any real-life person. (Timothy Zahn 👀👀👀). -- YakovChaimTzvi (he/him/his) ChissAscendancyCanonSymbol.svg (talk) 04:08, 30 October 2021 (UTC)

Object

Comments

Anj Zavor

  • Nominated by: Ayrehead02 (talk) 14:08, 17 October 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: One of very few (if not the only) article I'm aware of that is CA length in Legends and FA length in canon.
  • WookieeProject (optional):

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  1. A friend of Raddus is a friend of mine. JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 17:05, 20 October 2021 (UTC)
  2. VergenceScatter (talk) 07:11, 9 November 2021 (UTC)
  3. Inqvote.png OOM 224 22:23, 14 November 2021 (UTC)
  4. Liverpool92Ackbar HS.jpg 03:04, 23 November 2021 (UTC)

Object

OOM
  • Date ref: "As the mission to Ryloth takes place between these two events" — according to what source(s)? OOM 224 21:29, 14 November 2021 (UTC)
    • How does it look now? Ayrehead02 (talk) 22:13, 14 November 2021 (UTC)
      • Looks good OOM 224 22:23, 14 November 2021 (UTC)

Comments

Bakkar

  • Nominated by: JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 21:49, 21 October 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: FAN #2, canon this time. Thanks to Fred for help with the GE parts!
  • WookieeProject (optional): WP:GE, WP:NOVELS

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  1. Inqvote.png OOM 224 17:30, 17 November 2021 (UTC)

Object

OOM
  • One thing that stands out to me here (other than that redlink :P) is that the intro doesn't mention Bakkar's P&T, so I think that should be mentioned
    • What are you interested in being mentioned? Already got his fanhood of podracing in there. And redlink done.
      • Ah, sorry. I missed that and only saw the part about the talkative droid OOM 224 18:28, 16 November 2021 (UTC)
  • Grammatical errors in the last sentence, BTS OOM 224 22:09, 14 November 2021 (UTC)
    • Not sure of what you speak. Please elaborate. JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 04:09, 15 November 2021 (UTC)
      • "like used in The Official Black Spire Outpost Cookbook,[2] this article presents the former's as the canonical depiction." — "Like used" and "former's" don't work in this line here. OOM 224 18:28, 16 November 2021 (UTC)
  • Please see if you're okay with this edit of mine OOM 224 22:38, 16 November 2021 (UTC)
    • I am, thanks. Just a reminder though, I prefer to leave this type of sentence without a ref.
      • Sure OOM 224 17:30, 17 November 2021 (UTC)
  • Also, "dreaming of selling his family's famous meat on another Outer Rim Territories planet" sounds like good P&T material OOM 224 22:43, 16 November 2021 (UTC)

Comments


Abhean/Legends

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  1. JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 18:49, 3 November 2021 (UTC)
  2. Inqvote.png OOM 224 16:42, 26 November 2021 (UTC)

Object

Comments

XoXaan (Redux review)

  • Redux comments: Reduxed per Meeting 131.
  • Date added: October 24, 2021

(+0)

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Object

Comments

Parrlay

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Drolen Antig

  • Nominated by: OOM 224 22:12, 12 November 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: Otter never got to see this through to the end. Previous noms.
  • WookieeProject (optional):

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Wrobie Tyce

  • Nominated by: JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 04:35, 17 November 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: I get two FAN slots now! Shodu has been bumped back in the schedule so here's one for WP:PRIDE :)
  • WookieeProject (optional): WP:PRIDE, WP:NOVELS

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  1. Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 13:57, 17 November 2021 (UTC)

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Ayrehead
  • Initial stuff, I think the intro could be about a paragraph longer with a little more detail on stuff like the battle since you don't even currently mention who they're fighting anywhere. Ayrehead02 (talk) 11:23, 17 November 2021 (UTC)
    • Expanded the second one, how's that?
  • I'd say there's room for a couple more pictures in the body, subsections with three paragraphs can generally support two. A shot of her at one of the meetings would be good. Ayrehead02 (talk) 11:23, 17 November 2021 (UTC)
    • I'll grab one or two when I get home.
    • Added one, not really another I can add for the Exegol section since there's nothing but her in the cockpit. JediMasterMacaroni(Talk) 04:37, 19 November 2021 (UTC)
  • Others might disagree, so I'm happy to discuss this, but I personally think it's worth including that the kissing scene was cut for some international audiences. Ayrehead02 (talk) 11:23, 17 November 2021 (UTC)

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Antipose

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  • A question has been raised as to why the formatting of "The Power Gem" differs in this article between Appearances and referencing. The comic was originally published in a newspaper comic strip format, so there's no applicable citation template to use in Appearances. As for the references, I decided to implement the short story citation template for the Epic Collection volume since there are some subjects out there for whom information would have to be cited to the different incarnations of "The Power Gem" (see Junkfort Station cantina for an example). I would also have had to use the specific instance of the {{Shortstory}} reference pointing to the Epic Collection on this article anyway—for example, for the fact that its sun was at one point occulted. Since this article, unlike the aforementioned cantina example, does not have any information specific to the older publications, I decided to just go by with the "reference sparingly" recommendation of the Sourcing policy and just use the Epic Collection reference for all instances of "The Power Gem" references in the article. Imperators II(Talk) 19:56, 23 November 2021 (UTC)


Darth Bane

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Theron Nett

  • Nominated by: Ayrehead02 (talk) 17:47, 28 November 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: Clearly a popular man as his nomination was suggested by both Hanzo and Shay
  • WookieeProject (optional):

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Lant Davan

  • Nominated by: Braha'tok enthusiast Hello there 11:31, 1 December 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: When I first watched A New Hope, one of my favourite costumes was that of the Alderaanian fleet troopers at the start. So when I first saw Matt 'freaking' Lanter play an updated version of the trooper in The Mandalorian, he became my favourite minor character from the show so far. Successfully GANing this article was one of my prouder moments of 2020 on the Wook as it was the first live-action article I was able to bring to such a high standard. Although further updates brought it above GAN length, I feel ready to bring it to the next stage. So here's to round two.
  • WookieeProject (optional): WP:TMND

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Skeebo

  • Nominated by: Imperators II(Talk) 22:01, 1 December 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: As I understand it, the adventures of Boba Fett somewhat more than five years after Sarlacc seem to be all the rage now.
  • WookieeProject (optional): WP:AST, WP:COMICS

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