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This page is for Featured article nominations. A Featured article is an article that is of complete quality and represents the best a Wookieepedia article can be. It is for fully fleshed out subjects that go beyond the limited content of Good and Comprehensive articles. On this page, users can nominate articles that they believe are ready to be reviewed to achieve Featured status.

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All nominations will be considered idle and are subject to immediate removal by Inquisitorius vote if objections are not addressed after a period of 2 weeks.

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Contents

Featured article nominations

View recent changes for this page and its subpages

Onager-class Star Destroyer

  • Nominated by:--Vitus InfinitusTalk 18:25, March 4, 2020 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: Giving featured article nominations another try!

(2 Inqs/4 Users/6 Total)

(Votes required: 1 Inqvote(s) required to reach minimum. No additional votes required to pass, please consider reviewing another article.)

Support

  1. Great job on fixing up the article! —Tomotron Revanchist Sith.svg (Star Forge) 01:02, March 10, 2020 (UTC)
  2. QuiGonJinn Senate seal.svg(Talk) 14:45, May 7, 2020 (UTC)
  3. A fine read. Braha'tok enthusiast (Hello there) 23:09, May 29, 2020 (UTC)
  4. Mr Star Wars Amino Republic talk 6:30 May 30, 2020 (UTC)
  5. Inqvote.png Nice work! Supreme Emperor (talk) 01:49, 22 April 2021 (UTC)
  6. Inqvote.png MasterFredCommerce Guild.svg(talk) 20:35, 5 June 2021 (UTC)

Object

Shayanomer
  • Well done for the most part, however, you have some issues:
  • "Navigation computer" seems to be infobox-exclusive.
  • Battle of Endor should be given a date in the intro
  • "During the Galactic Civil War, there were several examples of this class. Several ships were the Cataclysm, the Rakehell, the Sunder, and the Onager-class Testbed." This can be merged into one sentence to use the named ships as the examples specified in the first sentence.
  • "Beyond the end of the indentation but before the command tower structure were two deflector shield generator domes similar to those[3] found in Imperial-class Star Destroyers,[6] as well as several other deflector shield generators." I don't think you should use Rogue One as a source if it doesn't mention the deflector shield generator. I would suggest replacing the reference with the Blueprints from Card Trader (See the exact card used in the status articles Formidable and Adjudicator).
    • Thanks! Fixed!--Vitus InfinitusTalk 01:15, March 6, 2020 (UTC)
      • Ok so for this, you'll need to make two separate references. For stuff like "solar ionization reactor" or "deflector shield," follow Rakehell, Sunder, and Cataclysm as examples. You don't need two separate references for that info. Secondly, the reference for the ISD should be the card directly, as you've currently used the same reference for both. Shayanomer (talk) 06:15, March 6, 2020 (UTC)
  • Second paragraph of the History section is missing a reference at the end.
  • Do the sources make the connection between the Mandator IV and the Onager? If they don't, then I don't think you can say the former functioned similarly to the latter. What you could say is that the concept of orbital bombardment weaponry aboard a Star Destroyer was implemented into the Mandator IV. Shayanomer (talk) 04:02, March 5, 2020 (UTC)
  • Galactic Civil War should be given dates. Shayanomer (talk) 04:07, March 5, 2020 (UTC)
  • Article needs to list all cards within the Expansion Pack that feature or mention the Onager instead of just linking the whole set like that. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 01:25, 29 November 2020 (UTC)
  • Sources need to be listed chronologically, and a 1stID next to the source that identifies the ship by its full name.
  • The article says "Imperial Siege Breaker" while BTS and the Sources section say "Siege Breaker." Please correct this. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 06:17, 8 December 2020 (UTC)
  • "Sometime between the years[2] 5 and 0 BBY[10] during the early rebellion against the Galactic Empire..." Since we determined that the Civil War starts by 4 BBY, I think you should just remove the "early rebellion" bit. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 14:24, 8 December 2020 (UTC)
  • You will now have to list the Onager cards rereleased in Upgrade Card Collection. These are different from the original cards so you need to list them separately. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 19:01, 9 December 2020 (UTC)
Toprawa
  • The size of the article warrants a larger intro than just one paragraph. Also, please fix the italicization formatting of this nomination. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 19:13, April 20, 2020 (UTC)
    • Expanded intro. I fixed italicization of the title of the nomination, is there anything else?--Vitus InfinitusTalk 20:35, April 20, 2020 (UTC)
QGJ
  • You've got a few duplicate links.
  • Please fix image caption formatting. Remember that only full sentences get a period at the end.
    • I changed image captions, and I think I fixed the formatting--Vitus InfinitusTalk 15:03, May 3, 2020 (UTC)
  • Each ref note should have all available subjects linked to.
  • Can you reformat ref 4 to make it less cumbersome? It's really hard to understand what it's trying to get across at the moment. QuiGonJinn Senate seal.svg(Talk) 09:43, May 3, 2020 (UTC)
  • There are instances of info sourced to two consecutive references. Those should be avoided unless absolutely necessary. And if they are necessary, then consecutive ref notes should always be arranged in ascending order. There are some refs that do not follow this rule. QuiGonJinn Senate seal.svg(Talk) 15:36, May 6, 2020 (UTC)
OOM
  • Haxen Delto and Airen Cracken shouldn't be linked in the quote template.
  • The alternate names "Onager-class Destroyer and "Siege Breaker" are completely unnecessary. I see that when mentioned without -class, Onager isn't capitalised, but there's no point including it as an alternate title in the intro.
  • Same goes for the list of names in "General characteristics" section.
  • Some of the images could be enlarged.
  • "Despite the Rebel victory at Endor […]" Not sure about the capitalisation of "rebel" here. Is it capitalised in the source?
  • Starter sentence for the Legacy section should connect with the previous line about the GCW. The Empire's ultimate defeat there should be mentioned in place of "after the fall of the Galactic Empire."
  • I found some linking of individual words of proper compound nouns while skimming through the article. (e.g. Death Star) There's probably a few more in the article that needs removing. - - -CIS roundel.svg OOM 224 ༼༽{talk}༼༽ 18:53, September 22, 2020 (UTC)
    • Thank you. I'll check through it and remove any more that I find--Vitus InfinitusTalk 21:45, September 24, 2020 (UTC)
      • I can't find any more but I'll keep looking--Vitus InfinitusTalk 17:52, September 25, 2020 (UTC)
        • Great. Striking so that the objection won't exceed the time limit. - - -CIS roundel.svg OOM 224 ༼༽{talk}༼༽ 21:58, October 1, 2020 (UTC)
  • Not sure what this is about. Please reword with some formal language and without original research. "At one point during the Imperial Era, an Imperial moff ordered an Onager-class Star Destroyer to destroy a city from orbit, while in another moment an Alliance base was destroyed, though it was undetermined if the Empire had equipped a miniaturized Death Star superlaser on an Onager or if it was something else." - - -CIS roundel.svg OOM 224 ༼༽{talk}༼༽ 21:58, October 1, 2020 (UTC)
    • That is not original research, that's how it's worded in the source. I've slightly reworded to be more encyclopedic, but I'd appreciate it if you don't say that I'm using original research without checking first, thanks.--Vitus InfinitusTalk 13:48, October 8, 2020 (UTC)
      • Sorry for the assumption. Does the source mention who was undetermined as to whether the Onager used DS technology? Also, I don't understand what "a different circumstance" is referring to; that the Onager could have been equipped with some other technology? - - -OOM 224 ༼༽{talk}༼༽ 15:41, October 8, 2020 (UTC)
        • No worries! The source phrases the sentence as a question, so for that piece of information within the question I phrased it as being undetermined. Additionally, "a different circumstance" is the change I made to "something else" to make it more encyclopedic, since the source says "something else." The full statement is "Has the Empire successfully mounted a miniaturized Death Star superlaser on an Onager, or did something else destroyed the base?"--Vitus InfinitusTalk 00:25, October 9, 2020 (UTC)
  • The Mustafar DB entry doesn't say the action at Mustafar marked the beginning of the GCW, only that it was "one of the earliest rebel victories" of the war. Please revise the article accordingly. - - -OOM 224 ༼༽{talk}༼༽ 15:41, October 8, 2020 (UTC)
  • The article body and intro states the alternative name is "Imperial Siege Breaker," while it's just "Siege Breaker" in bts.
    • It's because it was originally only identified as the Siege Breaker. Onager-class Star Destroyer and Imperial Siege Breaker originate from much later sources.--Vitus InfinitusTalk 14:33, October 9, 2020 (UTC)
  • Could the Onager's designation as a capital ship be included in the infobox? - - -OOM 224 ༼༽{talk}༼༽ 13:55, October 9, 2020 (UTC)
  • (Reviewing note) Links should be provided in individuals references; when used in ref notes, they don't count as duplicate links.
  • (Reviewing note) Twitter citations don't need an image link if a backup link is already provided.
  • The Legacy section could use an additional image. - - -OOM 224 ༼༽{talk}༼༽ 11:47, October 16, 2020 (UTC)
  • The amount of text in the caption of the last image is a bit too much. Enlarging the image would help, but even then the text should be shortened. - - -OOM 224 ༼༽{talk}༼༽ 14:50, 29 November 2020 (UTC)
Fred strikes back
  • Can we try to divide these massive sections up? A section should ideally be between 1-3 paragraphs. MasterFredCommerce Guild.svg(talk) 04:26, 12 November 2020 (UTC)
  • To build off the last objection, with more sections, are there any more images or quotes that could be added? MasterFredCommerce Guild.svg(talk) 05:14, 2 December 2020 (UTC)
    • There's no other quotes but there is an image, though I don't really want to use it since there's no high quality version. File:SunderFFG.png. --Vitus InfinitusTalk 14:58, 4 December 2020 (UTC)
      • That's fair. That image is definitely not suitable for a status article. MasterFredCommerce Guild.svg(talk) 03:55, 11 December 2020 (UTC)
  • {{Mediacat}} should be placed inside the reference scrollbox. MasterFredCommerce Guild.svg(talk) 03:58, 11 December 2020 (UTC)
    • Fixed --Vitus InfinitusTalk 03:09, 21 December 2020 (UTC)
      • Actually, it should go in "Sources," but since I misspoke, I went ahead and moved it. MasterFredCommerce Guild.svg(talk) 21:10, 25 December 2020 (UTC)
  • Is there a reason you don't italicize "Onager" when on its own? MasterFredCommerce Guild.svg(talk) 06:29, 25 January 2021 (UTC)
    • Starships and Speeders doesn't italicize, so I didn't either. --Vitus InfinitusTalk 20:02, 26 January 2021 (UTC)
  • You shouldn't start a new section with a pronoun when referring to the subject of the article.
  • "Toward," "forward," "backward," and similar words are preferred without the "s" at the end.
  • See here for an explanation on when to use "that" versus "which." You can see where I changed some in my copy-edit here, but that only covers the intro and first two sections. MasterFredCommerce Guild.svg(talk) 06:51, 25 January 2021 (UTC)
    • Seems like most of them were in the paragraphs you fixed. Done. --Vitus InfinitusTalk 20:06, 26 January 2021 (UTC)
  • The first sentence of "Role" is a run-on sentence.
  • "Considered an even greater threat" by who? MasterFredCommerce Guild.svg(talk) 19:39, 26 April 2021 (UTC)
Tommy
  • To clarify, is the relationship between the Onager and the Mandator IV directly mentioned in sources? Or is that a link you've made?
    • I have spoken with Vitus, and he has allowed me to adopt the nomination. Alright, I have not found any established connection between the two ships, nor with the Xyston. I can ask Vitus if you'd like me to, though. CIS roundel.svg Erebus Chronus (talk) 18:35, 1 April 2021 (UTC)
      • I've spoken with Vitus, and the connection is established in the Rebel Files. It implies that the technology was used by the First Order. CIS roundel.svg Erebus Chronus (talk) 21:05, 1 April 2021 (UTC)
  • Please refer to the MoS section on linking. Tommy-Macaroni 13:46, 1 April 2021 (UTC)

Comments

  • In reference to the Sunder image linked above, the card was recently released in Upgrade Card Collection in a larger size, meaning you can acquire a higher quality shot for the article. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 10:22, 12 December 2020 (UTC)
    • I'll add it when I'm able to have access to that card --Vitus InfinitusTalk 03:10, 21 December 2020 (UTC)
  • I am taking a temporary personal leave from the site for the sake of my personal health and happiness, and I expect to return anywhere from one week to several weeks. --Vitus InfinitusTalk 14:42, 28 March 2021 (UTC)
  • I have returned :P --Vitus InfinitusTalk 21:50, 2 April 2021 (UTC)


Waxer/Legends (Redux review)

  • Redux comments: Reduxed per Meeting 114.
  • Date added: April 11, 2020

(+2)

Support

  1. Inqvote.png TanDivoInsignia-SenateMurders.svg Anıl Şerifoğlu (talk) 23:37, April 11, 2020 (UTC)
  2. Inqvote.png Supreme Emperor (talk) 17:03, October 5, 2020 (UTC)

Object

Toprawa
  • Two-speaker quotes get the Quote template, not Dialogue. There's at least one case of this being done incorrectly in the article. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 19:43, April 24, 2020 (UTC)
  • The intro seems pretty large relative to the rest of the size of the article, which isn't all that big. Just eying it up, it probably doesn't need to be any longer than the length of the infobox. Whoever is potentially maintaining this thing, see what you can do about cutting it down. Concentrate on unnecessary details that can be saved for the Bio. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 00:19, 2 February 2021 (UTC)
    • Sorry for the slow response. I have gone through the intro and removed some unneccessary detail. Please check if that is enough or if it needs more trimming. QuiGonJinn Senate seal.svg(Talk) 10:24, 20 February 2021 (UTC)
    • Objection(s) overridden by Inquisitorius 16:22, 20 April 2021 (UTC)
Shayanomer
  • Since Waxer has several lines of dialogue on the wiki, a {{Soundcat}} would be good to have on the article. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 07:58, May 10, 2020 (UTC)
Fred strikes back
  • Per other status articles on clones, the affiliation field in the infobox should also include the GAR and the 212th. MasterFredCommerce Guild.svg(talk) 20:46, 16 January 2021 (UTC)
    • It used to include those, but was changed in accordance with WP:LG, which states that: the "Affiliations" field of infoboxes shall list sub-bullets to a maximum depth of one. QuiGonJinn Senate seal.svg(Talk) 06:53, 18 January 2021 (UTC)
      • I was in discussion with Shay about this and we both thought that to be the case, but for some reason I completely missed that line when reading the infobox section in the LG. MasterFredCommerce Guild.svg(talk) 08:02, 18 January 2021 (UTC)

Comments

4-A7

  • Nominated by:--Editoronthewiki (talk) 04:36, May 2, 2020 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: With the war coming to a close, I figured it would make sense to look back at something from its start.

(2 Inqs/4 Users/6 Total)

(Votes required: 1 Inqvote(s) required to reach minimum. No additional votes required to pass, please consider reviewing another article.)

Support

  1. QuiGonJinn Senate seal.svg(Talk) 06:56, May 29, 2020 (UTC)
  2. --TheTrooperGuy (talk) 20:24, July 1, 2020 (UTC)
  3. Cwedin(talk) 15:14, 14 April 2021 (UTC)
  4. Commander Code-8 Hello There! 12:01, 26 May 2021 (UTC)
  5. Inqvote.png Thanks for handling my objections on discord so promptly. Excellent work on this! Supreme Emperor Holocomm 03:25, 5 June 2021 (UTC)
  6. Inqvote.png Objections handled via Discord. MasterFredCommerce Guild.svg(talk) 22:28, 11 June 2021 (UTC)

Object

AV
  • Citation 12 is broken. Looks like you left his Class One degree out of the info box.
    • How should I fix this?--Editoronthewiki (talk) 13:14, May 2, 2020 (UTC)
      • Okay, I did a little research and it doesn't look like you can site the RA-7 being a Class 1 droid to Droidography. Per the descriptions of the droid degrees from Droidography and the Visual Encyclopedia, the RA-7 would be a Class 3. I would add a note along the lines of "Star Wars: The Visual Encyclopedia establishes that protocol droids are third class droids. As the Star Wars: The Clone Wars film depicts 4-A7 as an RA-7 protocol droid, he must be a third class droid." to the infobox alongside Class 3, while changing citation 13 to match. - AV-6R7Crew Pit 17:06, May 2, 2020 (UTC)
        • I have fixed that, but it is still saying the reference is invalid?--Editoronthewiki (talk) 17:29, May 2, 2020 (UTC)
          • Tooks care of the degree field not displaying. As for the citation being invalid, make sure your capitalization matches that of the parent citation. - AV-6R7Crew Pit 17:44, May 2, 2020 (UTC)
  • Per the Star Wars dot com Encyclopedia entry for the Twilight, the ship belonged to Ziro's criminal organization. Given his part in the plot to kidnap Rotta, this might be worth mentioning in the article. - AV-6R7Crew Pit 05:15, May 2, 2020 (UTC)
  • 4-A7's model was reused as Unidentified RA-7 protocol droid (Coruscant), would be worth mentioning in the Bts. - AV-6R7Crew Pit 05:47, May 2, 2020 (UTC)
    • Sorry to interject here, but I've checked Evil Plans' episode guide and it doesn't say anything about that droid's model being repurposed from 4-A7. Until there is concrete evidence, like The Jedi Who Knew Too Much's guide, I say we should leave it out. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 05:58, May 2, 2020 (UTC)
      • I took AV and Shay's points into account and simply noted it looks similar.--Editoronthewiki (talk) 16:51, May 2, 2020 (UTC)
        • Since 4-A7's character model was used a throughout the series for generic droids, I might see about taking the time to track down every time it was reused without alteration, rather than having the article pinpoint this single example. - AV-6R7Crew Pit 17:06, May 2, 2020 (UTC)
          • Should I describe what those droids do like I did for the Coruscant one, or simply list that they were there?--Editoronthewiki (talk) 17:46, May 2, 2020 (UTC)
            • Probsbly that they the model was present in whichever episodes. - AV-6R7Crew Pit 17:48, May 2, 2020 (UTC)
              • Based on what another objection is saying, I feel like it makes more sense for me to not list out every episode. Instead, I could note the similar looking droids exist and source it to several (maybe just three or so) episodes.--Editoronthewiki (talk) 00:16, May 21, 2020 (UTC)
                • Yeah, that makes sense, I agree with this change. - AV-6R7Crew Pit 22:27, May 21, 2020 (UTC)
                  • Should I get into episodes that use the updated model?--Editoronthewiki (talk) 21:08, May 22, 2020 (UTC)
                    • No, I shouldn't think you need to mention that in the Bts beyond the fact that 4-A7's model was updated into R-A7. If R-A7's model was used elsewhere in the series, that should go on their page. - AV-6R7Crew Pit 21:11, May 22, 2020 (UTC)
  • 4-A7 has a sizeable section in Star Wars: Build Your Own R2-D2 11 that contains new information. You can chase down User:Ayrehead02 for access to the source. - AV-6R7Crew Pit 20:52, May 29, 2020 (UTC)
Shayanomer
  • You can definitely cut down at least 2 of the big paragraphs, which would create room for sectioning. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 05:38, May 2, 2020 (UTC)
    • By cut down do you mean reduce word count or split them into separate paragraphs? As I think sectioning means creating subheaders?--Editoronthewiki (talk) 18:11, May 2, 2020 (UTC)
  • In the sources, you need to the list the base episode guide, not the gallery.
    • Looks like Cwedin fixed this while I was writing the objection. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 05:43, May 2, 2020 (UTC)
  • You can definitely add info on 4A-7's model being reused for another droid in The Jedi Who Knew Too Much, according to that gallery. Here, the gallery itself will be used to source this information. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 05:42, May 2, 2020 (UTC)
    • Look okay?--Editoronthewiki (talk) 17:17, May 2, 2020 (UTC)
      • Looks fine for now, but I feel that stuff like the episode seasons is a bit overkill. It doesn't really break the article in my opinion. Better to wait and see what other people think. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 17:31, May 2, 2020 (UTC)
  • Sourcing Jabba's species separately feels really unnecessary since we can clearly see him in the film.
    • Fixed that. Ultimate establishes the dark acolyte title and outright states Ventress kidnapped Rotta, so that is why it is used--Editoronthewiki (talk) 21:28, May 26, 2020 (UTC)
  • I'm sure there's a more concrete source you can use to replace an old SWE entry for the Twilight.
    • I am not sure what you mean. It is only there to source it was part of Ziro's operation.--Editoronthewiki (talk) 21:28, May 26, 2020 (UTC)
      • I've checked the source and it doesn't really make it clear that Teth was occupied by the Separatists. The canon reference books I've checked all say it was within Hutt-controlled territory. Only the fortress was under Separatist control. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 16:17, May 27, 2020 (UTC)
  • I'm also certain there are more quotes from 4-A7 you can include in the article, expanding existing quotes or replacing quotes from other characters.
  • "His gray body was also similar in appearance to the 3PO-series protocol droid." This is unnecessary and feels like speculation.
    • It is very similar to the 3PO series, and I feel like it should be included. There appear to be two in-universe models of RA-7s, those that have a similar body to 3POs and those that do not. As 4-A7 falls into the former category, it should be noted.--Editoronthewiki (talk) 16:01, May 27, 2020 (UTC)
      • Then in that case, every single RA-7 droid of that model has a similar body to a 3PO droid, which I believe would be redundant information on individual droid articles. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 16:17, May 27, 2020 (UTC)
  • "RA-7 was willing to answer and even warned him that the dungeons were dangerous" This is the first time in the article you mention "dungeons." Please elaborate on this.
    • Changed wording in second paragraph of the biography section to fix that--Editoronthewiki (talk) 16:40, May 27, 2020 (UTC)
  • Per Layout Guide, the film only requires the release year in the BTS. This also means you can say that the novelizations came out "before the film."
  • Context for A New Hope. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 10:07, May 24, 2020 (UTC)
    • Good?--Editoronthewiki (talk) 21:28, May 26, 2020 (UTC)
      • You still need to point out that the novels came out before the film. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 16:17, May 27, 2020 (UTC)
  • You've had the update tag and redlink on the article for quite a while. Have you finished updating the article? Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 05:59, June 9, 2020 (UTC)
    • Sorry for the delay. I just needed to double check if some information needed to be added. It is almost done.--Editoronthewiki (talk) 15:07, June 10, 2020 (UTC)
  • Can you replace the SWE reference with something more recent? The precedent is to use it as sparingly as possible. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 09:54, September 4, 2020 (UTC)
  • So that this is official: Redlink needs to be cleared and the page updated. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 18:39, October 13, 2020 (UTC)
  • Please use {{AltayaCite}} for the booklet citation. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 08:06, 5 June 2021 (UTC)
Cwedin
  • Just a few things in the BTS:
    • Can you add the full release dates for the film and novels?
      • The film can out in Europe first. Should I put the US release date?--Editoronthewiki (talk) 17:40, May 2, 2020 (UTC)
        • Yes, I would use the film's wide release date (15 August).
    • "Malevolence" should be italicized.
    • The novelization references should also be formatted. - Cwedin(talk) 05:56, May 2, 2020 (UTC)
  • More BTS:
    • Fourth sentence needs a full stop.
    • "An animation model[18] that looks very similar to 4-A7's[2] was later used in the[18] Season Three [19] episode "Evil Plans" as a RA-7 protocol droid on[18] the Republic capital world[20] of Coruscant.[18] For the[21] Season Five[22] episode..." and so on: There's a lot of superfluous info here that could be trimmed down.
      • Good?--Editoronthewiki (talk) 02:30, May 3, 2020 (UTC)
        • Better. You can also remove the references in "For the[19] Season Five[20] episode..." since all of that can be sourced to [19]. - Cwedin(talk) 02:52, May 3, 2020 (UTC)
    • I'd also recommend splitting the BTS into two paragraphs. - Cwedin(talk) 02:17, May 3, 2020 (UTC)
      • I still have some work to get done in it, but this has been done--Editoronthewiki (talk) 13:44, May 15, 2020 (UTC)
  • Some minor things:
    • The links to Confederacy should be removed, since that's a real world disambiguation page.
    • In the second intro paragraph, there's a stray "but."
    • In the bio: "a RA-7" --> "an RA-7."
    • The image captions should use characters' full names.
    • In the BTS, I don't think it's necessary to mention every instance of a similar animation model. Maybe something like "Animation models used for the RA-7 series in the television series look very similar to 4-A7's model," and then reference that sentence with some of the episodes.
    • "Star Wars Legends" should be identified as a continuity. - Cwedin(talk) 20:40, May 16, 2020 (UTC)
Braha'tok enthusiast
QGJ
  • The infobox death field can all be sourced with a single ref note, if you add a little additional context.
  • What exactly was "dangerous?" It's unclear what you are referring to here. Warning the Jedi Knight that it was dangerous
  • Same thing in the "Characteristics." When the Jedi Knight asked where Rotta was, RA-7 was willing to answer and even warned him that it was dangerous.
  • Do we need both refs for the release date of the two novelizations in the Bts? Can't we just stick with one?
    • Well, he first appeared in both, and they were released the same day. So I had figured it was needed.--Editoronthewiki (talk) 21:51, May 21, 2020 (UTC)
      • I meant this part: which were both released on July 26, 2008. It is currently sourced to both to the Year by Year book and the SW.com article. If both of those sources proviode the release date for the aforementioned books, we can just pick one source, having two refs is redundant in this case. QuiGonJinn Senate seal.svg(Talk) 09:51, May 25, 2020 (UTC)
        • Year by Year only provides the release date for the junior novel, so two refs are needed. But it looks like the SW.com reference doesn't actually mention the Del Rey novelization, so that should be replaced with an Amazon listing or something. - Cwedin(talk) 17:39, May 27, 2020 (UTC)
          • Could someone help me with that Amazon link? I have the url, back up link, and title there, but I am doing something wrong.--Editoronthewiki (talk) 20:55, May 28, 2020 (UTC)
            • I've fixed this for you. You had some wrong parameter names. QuiGonJinn Senate seal.svg(Talk) 06:56, May 29, 2020 (UTC)
  • Article is listed in Category:Espionage droids, but I don't see the term linked anywhere in the article. QuiGonJinn Senate seal.svg(Talk) 13:05, May 21, 2020 (UTC)
    • I had to use the term "spy droid," as that's the canon version.--Editoronthewiki (talk) 22:14, May 21, 2020 (UTC)
      • You are correct. I did not notice that the canon term is different, my bad. QuiGonJinn Senate seal.svg(Talk) 09:51, May 25, 2020 (UTC)
OOM
Zed
  • In the intro: "Turning her weapon against the protocol droid, 4-A7 told her to not dare kill him, only to then be swiftly decapitated." This wording seems to imply that 4-A7 is the one turning a weapon. Zed42 (talk) 10:14, September 4, 2020 (UTC)
Macaroni
  • Under errors, I don't see a reason to mention he didn't appear in the whole series, just the episode he's credited in should be fine. JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 20:45, 26 February 2021 (UTC)
CC-8
  • A minor thing: The Battle of Teth is directly named in the intro but only pipelinked in the body, I think the full name should be used, even if it's not at the spot it's linked at. Commander Code-8 Hello There! 07:43, 20 May 2021 (UTC)

Comments

  • There are several things I want community opinion on--Editoronthewiki (talk) 04:36, May 2, 2020 (UTC)
    • When Ahsoka lights her lightsaber after he calls her a servant girl, his arms are slightly raised, implying he was surprised/scared. I figure this is too much of an assumption, but I might as well ask.--Editoronthewiki (talk) 04:36, May 2, 2020 (UTC)
      • I think it would be safe to say he was startled by Ahsoka's actions. - JMAS Jolly Trooper.png Hey, it's me! 06:05, May 2, 2020 (UTC)
        • Should I put that in the characteristics section or biography?--Editoronthewiki (talk) 13:17, May 2, 2020 (UTC)
          • I don't think it was a characteristic, so I think the biography section. - JMAS Jolly Trooper.png Hey, it's me! 18:53, May 2, 2020 (UTC)
            • Well I put "seemingly" just in case it was part of his act. It probably was not, but just to be sure.--Editoronthewiki (talk) 23:26, May 2, 2020 (UTC)
    • When Ahsoka talks to him on the landing pad, he kind of seems nervous, but I also want community opinion to see if I should include that.--Editoronthewiki (talk) 04:36, May 2, 2020 (UTC)
    • I think I should continue to go through The Clone Wars episodes to see if his name appears in the credits of other episodes. I had just wanted this nomination up before Season Seven ended. Should I only be looking in the English credits? Disney plus does show some foreign credits at the end of episodes.--Editoronthewiki (talk) 04:36, May 2, 2020 (UTC)
      • Update on this: I checked the credits of all of season one and two. I will continue to go through and check each episode's credits in the coming days. I am only checking the blue credits that appear before the clip of R2-D2 presenting the logo.--Editoronthewiki (talk) 02:55, May 3, 2020 (UTC)
        • Well it has taken me too long to get back to this! I have gone through seasons three, four, and seven now. Sorry it has taken me so long to finish this part of the nomination.--Editoronthewiki (talk) 02:03, September 13, 2020 (UTC)
  • What is the canon source for the name 4-A7? If the only canon source that names the character is the episode guide, then the page needs to be moved to 4A7 with no dashes. - JMAS Jolly Trooper.png Hey, it's me! 05:23, May 2, 2020 (UTC)
    • The 4-A7 spelling comes from the film credits. - AV-6R7Crew Pit 05:33, May 2, 2020 (UTC)
      • Thanks for clarifying. Since Disney+ sometimes changes the subtitles from the blu-ray releases, I did confirm that both the blu-ray and Disney+ credits list him as 4-A7. - JMAS Jolly Trooper.png Hey, it's me! 06:08, May 2, 2020 (UTC)
  • Per a conversation I had via talk pages with User:DarthRuiz30, this article is now going with the assumption that the three battle droids were B1s. It will also make this project a lot easier.--Editoronthewiki (talk) 21:58, May 4, 2020 (UTC)
  • After observing this article for a while, it's my observation that this article is not suitable for nomination currently. Sources have been added since the nomination's beginning. Rule 1 of the nomination policy states that the article must be "well-written and comprehensively detailed". In my opinion, 4-A7 hasn't reached that point as it is still undergoing more updates. Since the nomination began, the article has gained a whopping 16k bytes in size. Every time the article undergoes such a change, it has to reviewed all over again, and more copy-edits have to be made to eliminate grammar and formatting errors. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 06:57, October 6, 2020 (UTC)


Silver Angel

  • Nominated by: RattsT (talk) 05:18, May 6, 2020 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: My first FAN, hopefully this goes well!

(0 Inqs/6 Users/6 Total)

(Votes required: 3 Inqvote(s) required to reach minimum. No additional votes required to pass, please consider reviewing another article.)

Support

  1. QuiGonJinn Senate seal.svg(Talk) 07:17, June 4, 2020 (UTC)
  2. Great job on maintaining the article. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 09:48, June 4, 2020 (UTC)
  3. Nice work.--TheTrooperGuy (talk) 20:17, July 1, 2020 (UTC)
  4. JMAS Jolly Trooper.png Hey, it's me! 06:16, July 8, 2020 (UTC)
  5. --Editoronthewiki (talk) 17:14, July 8, 2020 (UTC)
  6. Cade999 (talk) 14:49, 4 January 2021 (UTC)

Object

Shayanomer
  • "The job went awry, however, when Trace dumped the spice into hyperspace, fearful of what her sister's employers, the Pyke Syndicate, could do to her and her ship." Try to restructure this sentence to reduce the overuse of commas.
  • Double reference for the last sentence in Description is unnecessary, only the episode guide can be used here.
  • I don't think the info about Trace naming the ship can be sourced to the Databank, Deal No Deal would suffice here.
  • Kessel being a planet will need a reference of its own.
  • I believe the pilot who abandoned the spice delivery can have an article of its own.
  • You can add more info about the military lane, specifically, the Venator that Yularen and Skywalker were on.
  • Marg Krim can be introduced as the Pyke leader on his first mention in the article.
  • The Kom'rk that follows the Angel is the Gauntlet, which is missing from this article.
  • Ziro's escape from prison can be given a date.
  • Context for Ghost and Rebels in the BTS.
  • The concept artist(s) who illustrated the ship can be added to the BTS.
  • Reviewing note: Take care with the placement of commas in quotations.
  • Reviewing note: Be careful of underlinking in future nominations. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 08:52, May 8, 2020 (UTC)
    • All objections handled, except for the date note. Not sure how to figure out the placement of that event. RattsT (talk) 19:38, May 8, 2020 (UTC)
      • Use Anza as a guide. Since Galactic Atlas doesn't date the hostage crisis, you'll have to find the two closest events in the episode order and work out an approximate date. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 19:45, May 8, 2020 (UTC)
  • You should reference the specific gallery that makes the connection between this ship and the Ghost, which is the trivia gallery in this case. This can be done using the site's search bar since the guide doesn't allow you to open the individual galleries separately. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 19:50, May 8, 2020 (UTC)
  • The name of the Gauntlet will need a reference of its own. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 07:31, May 9, 2020 (UTC)
  • Escape from Oba Diah is missing from the infobox. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 09:06, May 10, 2020 (UTC)
  • Can you add some info on their capture in the intro as they tried to escape in the ship? Right now, it abruptly jumps to their escape from prison after dumping the spice.
  • Hyperdrive, communications and shields are missing from the infobox.
  • You've used "however" a lot in the article, can you introduce some variation in the wording?
  • Maul's takeover of Mandalore will need to sourced to Shades of Reason. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 08:27, June 4, 2020 (UTC)
  • Missing Sources: Rafa and Ahsoka's Databank entries, this TV spot, Deal No Deal clip.
  • Deal No Deal's concept art gallery shows that JP Balmet drew the ship's exterior, this is missing from the BTS. In addition, one of the images in that gallery depicts Kessel and Oba Diah's lighting concept with the ship in it, done by Jason Boesch. The gallery in Together Again also has more lighting concept artwork by Boesch. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 08:40, June 4, 2020 (UTC)
    • Addressed all. RattsT (talk) 09:18, June 4, 2020 (UTC)
      • Great, just add little more in the intro about them attempting to escape from the palace before their capture and split it into two paragraphs. You also need to add a reference to Together Again's gallery with the specific slide. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 09:25, June 4, 2020 (UTC)
        • Is it necessary to cite every appearance of concept art? The fact that Boesch did artwork for the ship is already sourced to the DND gallery. RattsT (talk) 09:33, June 4, 2020 (UTC)
          • For comprehensiveness, it doesn't hurt to include it. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 09:36, June 4, 2020 (UTC)
            • Alright, added. RattsT (talk) 09:44, June 4, 2020 (UTC)
AV
  • The TCW Season 7 OST provides the alternate spelling Silverangel in the second volume. I would recommend making some mention of this in the Bts. - AV-6R7Crew Pit 02:41, May 12, 2020 (UTC)
    • Gross, they misspelled "Pikes" too. Added. RattsT (talk) 03:37, May 12, 2020 (UTC)
QGJ
  • This sentence makes it seem like Trace knew about Ahsoka's Jedi past right away, which wasn't the case. A little rewording is required. Martez was impressed with the former Jedi Padawan's eye for ships,
  • Lokann's name should be spelled out, instead of pipelinked as "a criminal" like that.
  • Please look into cutting some of the play-by-play details in the history. There are quite a lot of sentences, especially in the whole Oba Diah sequence, containing phrases such as "character X said this" and "character Y responded with that." This is always distracting, especially when the characters aren't even the focus of the article - the ship is.
    • I've excised some bits here and there, let me know if I can do more. I kept a bit between the sisters after their first escape because they're talking directly about the ship. RattsT (talk) 09:52, June 1, 2020 (UTC)
  • Both "Running spice" and "Escaping Oba Diah" sections look fairly long in the Oasis skin. Now this may change, depending on how much info you cut down. For now though, I feel like it's best to split those two sections and make them into three instead.
  • Is it "Pyke Palace" or "the Pyke Palace?" Please check the sources for the correct spelling. If the sources use both, then just choose one spelling yourself for consistency.
  • I feel like Maul deserves a tad more context upon first introduction, something like "former Sith Lord" should suffice.
  • Also related to Maul. You need to establish that Maul was in control of Mandalore, to give context for Bo-Katan's desire to defeat him. they were interrupted by the Mandalorian Bo-Katan Kryze, who had followed them from Oba Diah to request Tano's help in defeating Maul. QuiGonJinn Senate seal.svg(Talk) 09:09, June 1, 2020 (UTC)
    • All other points addressed. RattsT (talk) 09:52, June 1, 2020 (UTC)
      • All that's left is to provide a quote for the "Escaping to Coruscant" section. QuiGonJinn Senate seal.svg(Talk) 08:58, June 3, 2020 (UTC)
Braha'tok enthusiast
  • Would it be possible to mention Tano parting with the sisters in the intro? Even if it's only brief. Braha'tok enthusiast (Hello there) 13:01, July 7, 2020 (UTC)
  • That final history para is looking hella bloated :P . I think it would be best to bisect it. On top of that you should make the Bad Batch stuff into a new section as well because not only you'll have four paragraphs, but each pair of paras is part of a different story arc, so it makes sense to me to not keep them in the same section. Braha'tok enthusiast (Hello there) 08:59, 5 June 2021 (UTC)
    • Handled. Section currently has no image, though I'm not certain it needs one being as small as it is. If you think otherwise though, I can ask another user for an appropriate shot from the episode. RattsT (talk) 07:07, 6 June 2021 (UTC)
OOM
  • Images could be enlarged. - - -CIS roundel.svg OOM 224 ༼༽{talk}༼༽ 06:42, October 1, 2020 (UTC)
  • I've updated the dates with information from The Star Wars Book. You might want to look over them. - - -OOM 224 ༼༽{talk}༼༽ 07:19, October 5, 2020 (UTC)
    • They look fine to me. RattsT (talk) 08:12, October 8, 2020 (UTC)
  • The intro is rather short for a FA. Information from the Description section is particularly lacking.
    • Expanded. RattsT (talk) 02:06, 8 November 2020 (UTC)
  • "The two became quick friends, with Tano saving the young mechanic from the debt collector Pintu Son-El and assisting her in catching a renegade binary loadlifter" "Her" could easily be mistaken for referring to Pintu. - - -OOM 224 ༼༽{talk}༼༽ 22:08, 4 November 2020 (UTC)
    • I disagree. I think readers will be able understand who "her" is referring to through context. RattsT (talk) 02:06, 8 November 2020 (UTC)
  • The "(6)" of the engine unit field is infobox-exclusive. - - -OOM 224 ༼༽{talk}༼༽ 08:19, 8 November 2020 (UTC)
    • Added. RattsT (talk) 06:43, 10 November 2020 (UTC)
  • The last line of the second paragraph under the "The Clone Wars cancellation and revival" section is unsourced.
  • The mention of the production of the "Twins" is exclusive to the BTS image captions. - - -OOM 224 ༼༽{talk}༼༽ 12:28, 9 January 2021 (UTC)
    • I've removed much of the information related to the above two objections. It was added by another user and much of it was either improperly sourced, or irrelevant to this article. The source provided didn't even reference the ship. RattsT (talk) 04:09, 23 January 2021 (UTC)
  • A Youmay linking to Black Ace should be added. - - -OOM 224 ༼༽{talk}༼༽ 12:32, 9 January 2021 (UTC)
  • "The crew attempted to deceive the Syndicate's leader, Marg Krim, and avoid his wrath […]" Would replacing "and" with "to" be appropiate here?
    • "To deceive and avoid" makes more grammatical sense to me than "To deceive to avoid." RattsT (talk) 08:22, 24 February 2021 (UTC)
  • Quote attributions should provide full names.
    • As far as I can tell there's no rule stating this, seems to be up to individual writers. In fact, it's more inline with our writing standards to omit first names after their first usage, and I can point to several Featured Articles that do so. RattsT (talk) 08:22, 24 February 2021 (UTC)
      • I see, but for this article, it would be more informative/formal if the quote attributions, specifically the second one, provide full names instead of simply "Ahsoka" or "the Angel" OOM 224 ༼༽talk༼༽ 09:10, 24 February 2021 (UTC)
        • After thinking it over a bit I think I see where you're coming from a bit more and I've altered the second quotation. Seeing as that's the first quote used in the body, it makes sense to use the full names there. I'm still wary of using full names in every quote, however, as I feel it's redundant to the reader. RattsT (talk) 15:52, 24 February 2021 (UTC)
  • Location (e.g. Outer Rim) of planets should be mentioned.
  • Context for Clone Wars
  • Context for Oba Diah
    • Above three objections addressed. RattsT (talk) 08:22, 24 February 2021 (UTC)
  • Any specifics critcisms from Rafa and Ahsoka regarding the ship's name?
    • Not really, they just express some general distaste. RattsT (talk) 08:22, 24 February 2021 (UTC)
      • Ah, then "expressing distaste" would be more suitable here compared to "criticisms." OOM 224 ༼༽talk༼༽ 09:09, 24 February 2021 (UTC)
        • Adjusted. RattsT (talk) 15:52, 24 February 2021 (UTC)
  • Can the specific model of Anakin's Venator be determined? If so, a link to that model should replace the Venator-class Star Destroyer pipelink, which should in turn replace the Star Destroyer link.
    • Assuming this is in reference to the recent reveals of the Venator I and Venator II-class variants, I don't believe we're currently able to differentiate the two, so for now, no. If that becomes more evident in the future I'll make the change. RattsT (talk) 08:22, 24 February 2021 (UTC)
  • For the sake of consistency, please use either "Rafa and Tano" or "Tano and Rafa."
    • Handled. RattsT (talk) 08:22, 24 February 2021 (UTC)
  • As they returned to Oba Diah, Rafa Martez hailed the Toongs from the Angel under the alias of "Transport 1519" and ordered the workers to perform a "special request pickup." I find this sentence unclear as to who "they" is referring to. Also, how could the workers load spice on to the Silver Angel as it is returning to Oba Diah?
    • Edited for clarity. RattsT (talk) 08:22, 24 February 2021 (UTC)
  • The article does not mention how Ahsoka escaped from the Pykes in the "Escaping to Coruscant" section. OOM 224 ༼༽talk༼༽ 18:23, 22 February 2021 (UTC)
    • Ah, not sure how that happened. Fixed. RattsT (talk) 08:22, 24 February 2021 (UTC)
  • I think the intro can be expanded a bit more, covering the events between the Angel's impoundment on Oba Diah and Ahsoka's escape with the help of the Martez sisters. OOM 224 ༼༽talk༼༽ 16:03, 24 February 2021 (UTC)
    • Expanded. RattsT (talk) 16:14, 24 February 2021 (UTC)
  • The intro should also mention the reason why Ahsoka left with Bo-Katan. OOM 224 ༼༽talk༼༽ 16:30, 24 February 2021 (UTC)
    • I disagree. That's not really relevant for the intro. RattsT (talk) 17:08, 24 February 2021 (UTC)

Comments

EV-9D9

  • Nominated by: AV-6R7Crew Pit 22:43, May 11, 2020 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: I have taken care of the leftover objections from the original nomination.

(1 Inqs/9 Users/10 Total)

(Votes required: 2 Inqvote(s) required to reach minimum. No additional votes required to pass, please consider reviewing another article.)

Support

  1. QuiGonJinn Senate seal.svg(Talk) 20:45, June 26, 2020 (UTC)
  2. Fantastic work! RattsT (talk) 01:38, June 27, 2020 (UTC)
  3. Braha'tok enthusiast (Hello there) 17:33, July 1, 2020 (UTC)
  4. --TheTrooperGuy (talk) 20:27, July 1, 2020 (UTC)
  5. --Editoronthewiki (talk) 14:36, July 2, 2020 (UTC)
  6. Impressive work! - - -OOM 224 ༼༽{talk}༼༽ 20:30, October 17, 2020 (UTC)
  7. Looking good! Infectedzombieguy (talk) 05:35, 10 November 2020 (UTC)
  8. Cade999 (talk) 14:51, 4 January 2021 (UTC)
  9. Should've been FA the whole time! ~ D MCCG D MCCG.png (chat) 21:21, 12 June 2021 (UTC)
  10. Inqvote.png Thanks to J-Mac for handling my many objections on Discord and for assuming responsibility for the nomination. Great work! MasterFredCommerce Guild.svg(talk) 22:17, 17 June 2021 (UTC)

Object

TQG
  • Can you please add her Topps Finest 2019 - Droids card from Star Wars Card Trader to the sources and check that it has no unique information (See here for more details+release date) Toqgers (talk) 06:43, May 17, 2020 (UTC)
    • It would be good to list this card in Sources even if it doesn't feature unique info. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk)
      • She's also mentioned in the 8D8 card for the set. Should I make entries for both cards on the Card Trader wiki? - AV-6R7Crew Pit 22:07, May 20, 2020 (UTC)
        • Why not? There's no harm in including them. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 23:38, May 20, 2020 (UTC)
          • Added both cards to the sources section, made them entires in the Card Trader wiki, and added what new information there was to this article. - AV-6R7Crew Pit 21:03, May 22, 2020 (UTC)
            • You also need to upload images of the cards to that wiki, so that there's a permanent record of them. Also as a note, set names in the template must be italicized. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 20:27, May 23, 2020 (UTC)
Editor
Shayanomer
  • "...a flaw many of her model shared." This reads a little confusing.
  • You need to state that Galactic Atlas also dates the Battle of Yavin to 0 BBY in the date note.
  • "When the Trandoshan bounty hunter Bossk, working to retrieve the droid for the Empire, tracked it to the palace, the supervisor droid explained that 261 had escaped, claiming that he would soon learn some respect." Please restructure this to reduce its run-on nature.
    • Rewritten. - AV-6R7Crew Pit 03:41, May 26, 2020 (UTC)
      • I still think you can do better, try something like "When Bossk tracked the droid to the palace after being hired by the Empire". Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 08:22, May 26, 2020 (UTC)
  • Han Solo, R2-D2 and C-3PO need context in the body.
    • Added context for Han, R2 and 3PO already have context later in the paragraph. - AV-6R7Crew Pit 03:41, May 26, 2020 (UTC)
      • Per precedent, the context is always provided on their first mention. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 08:22, May 26, 2020 (UTC)
  • "C-3PO, a protocol droid, was made Jabba's new interpreter, as his last one was disintegrated after it had angered him, and was fitted with a restraining bolt before being returned to the palace's main audience chamber, and R2-D2, an astromech droid, was forced to serve drinks aboard Jabba's sail barge, the Khetanna." This is also too much of a run-on.
    • Split sentence. - AV-6R7Crew Pit 03:41, May 26, 2020 (UTC)
      • This will work with the above objection, moving the context will reduce this sentence's run-on nature. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 08:22, May 26, 2020 (UTC)
        • Forgot to note I fixed this with a prior objection. - AV-6R7Crew Pit 05:02, June 2, 2020 (UTC)
  • "...and some very nasty reprogramming." This doesn't sound so formal and encyclopedic.
  • "She ordered the torture of any droid that disobeyed her commands and, more often than not, even those that obeyed her. EV-9D9 relished her role as taskmaster of all the palace's droids and loved disintegrating her subordinates." It looks like information on torturing subordinates/those who obeyed her is repeated here.
    • I disagree, the first sentence explains the circumstances under which she orders the torture of her subordinates. I've swapped the sentences to better clarify this. - AV-6R7Crew Pit 03:41, May 26, 2020 (UTC)
  • If there's no relation between EV and the console behind her, then the Equipment section should be removed entirely.
  • I think her appearance in the Battlefront games can be detailed in the BTS (i.e. name of the map where she can be found). Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 16:28, May 25, 2020 (UTC)
    • Added Battlefront info to Bts. - AV-6R7Crew Pit 02:21, May 30, 2020 (UTC)
      • Release dates for these content updates are needed too, with proper sources. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 14:50, June 2, 2020 (UTC)
        • Added. - AV-6R7Crew Pit 04:47, June 16, 2020 (UTC)
          • The WebCitation link for Welcome to the Outer Rim isn't functioning properly. Can you use Internet Archive or another alternative? We're moving away from WebCitation for backup links as the site doesn't do its job properly. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 04:54, June 16, 2020 (UTC)
            • I replaced it with an IA link, but the webpage doesn't seem to function properly when archived. However, the data is still accessible with the ctrl + u command. - AV-6R7Crew Pit 05:06, June 16, 2020 (UTC)
  • Please check Star Wars Helmet Collection and other De Agostini magazines for appearances. I'm certain she's appeared somewhere since this is a prominent character. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 19:05, May 25, 2020 (UTC)
  • You now have over five redlinks in the article. You'll need to create the pages for the magazines. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 06:56, June 6, 2020 (UTC)
    • That should be all of the redlinks taken care of. - AV-6R7Crew Pit 03:33, June 16, 2020 (UTC)
  • An {{Imagecat}} can be added. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 13:48, June 19, 2020 (UTC)
    • Article already had one (down in external links due to how things used to be formatted), but I've moved it up to appearances. - AV-6R7Crew Pit 21:29, June 19, 2020 (UTC)
  • Now that she's confirmed to be in The Mandalorian, can you add a set photo from the show in the BTS? (this can be taken from Practical) Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 13:48, June 19, 2020 (UTC)
  • Please resolve the redlinks in the article. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 06:13, June 23, 2020 (UTC)
  • I think it would be better to move the image of 3PO and R2 to "The fall of a criminal empire," and have the old infobox image in the first section. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 06:22, June 23, 2020 (UTC)
    • Moved and added the old image back. - AV-6R7Crew Pit 07:16, June 23, 2020 (UTC)
      • Can you make some modifications so that the image does not indent the heading? Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 07:24, June 23, 2020 (UTC)
        • Adjusting the size did nothing, so I decided to move it up. - AV-6R7Crew Pit 08:03, June 23, 2020 (UTC)
  • Please create a page for the card you just added on the Card Trader wiki as the link here is currently a redlink over there. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 19:56, September 23, 2020 (UTC)
    • Created page for the card I didn't add. - AV-6R7Crew Pit 19:32, October 1, 2020 (UTC)
  • Return of the Jedi: Beware the Power of the Dark Side! audiobook missing from Appearances. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 12:56, 27 October 2020 (UTC)
  • Article must include info from Chapter 5's concept art gallery. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 12:41, 30 October 2020 (UTC)
QGJ
  • Context for R2-D2 and C-3PO needed in the intro.
  • Some of the paragraphs look huge in the Oasis skin. Please introduce more paragraph breaks, especially in "Chief of Cyborg Operations", "Characteristics" and the Bts.
  • "Characteristics" also desperately needs an image.
  • Bts could use subsectioning
  • I would move that concept art from Appearances to the Bts.
  • Can you provide a quote for the "Galactic Civil War" section?
    • Moved quote from first section to second since its more relevant. - AV-6R7Crew Pit 01:09, June 16, 2020 (UTC)
  • Speaking of that section. Even though it's called "Galactic Civil War," the actual term is not mentioned once in that section. Maybe it's worth renaming it to something more relevant to EV-9D9?
  • The quote in the Bts would benefit from some context on Anthony Daniels
  • Is 261 supposed to be referred as "he" or "it?" There are instances of both pronouns. Please stick with one.
  • Her non-canon appearance in Disney Infinity 3.0 needs to be discussed in the Bts.
    • Added. - AV-6R7Crew Pit 05:00, June 16, 2020 (UTC)
      • I feel like this needs a tad more context. What is this Toy Box mode and what it involves? Just a few more words would suffice. QuiGonJinn Senate seal.svg(Talk) 18:34, June 19, 2020 (UTC)
        • Added some additional context. - AV-6R7Crew Pit 02:20, June 21, 2020 (UTC)
  • If she appears in Star Wars: The Original Trilogy – A Graphic Novel, she is likely to appear in Star Wars: Return of the Jedi Graphic Novel Adaptation as well. Please check and add to the "Appearances" if necessary. QuiGonJinn Senate seal.svg(Talk) 13:27, June 5, 2020 (UTC)
    • Can confirm that her appearance from the OT graphic novel is intact in the standalone RotJ version. - AV-6R7Crew Pit 03:47, June 16, 2020 (UTC)
Tommy
  • Just so this is a formal objection, this article needs to be updated with all missing Mandalorian content. Tommy-Macaroni 08:43, June 19, 2020 (UTC)
  • Dup link.
    • Removed.
  • Quotes should not contain links.
    • Even when the subject is not mentioned/linked anywhere else?
      • Yes. Per the MoS: "Internal links should not be added to quotes because they serve little purpose beyond making the quotes appear cluttered and messy. Links should only be added in quote attributions and image captions if the subject is not linked in the article body already." Tommy-Macaroni 16:48, 30 April 2021 (UTC)
  • As she's been mentioned in several Build Your Own R2-D2 issues, I just want to confirm that the issues listed on the page have been checked and the rest of the series has been examined for extra mentions. Tommy-Macaroni 12:58, 19 April 2021 (UTC)
Ratts
  • Paragraph break needed in the intro.
  • Images need to be repositioned.
    • How do the images look now? - AV-6R7Crew Pit 21:18, June 19, 2020 (UTC)
      • Pretty good. As of now the concept art image should be moved to the left, but I assume you'll add a picture from Gallery that will offset it anyway. RattsT (talk) 21:26, June 19, 2020 (UTC)
  • A quote could be added to the first section of the bio. RattsT (talk) 20:31, June 19, 2020 (UTC)
  • In the Legacy section, can the capacity to which she's mentioned in Survival Skills be expanded?
    • Expanded. - AV-6R7Crew Pit 03:12, June 21, 2020 (UTC)
      • Now it's a run-on. You should break that sentence up. RattsT (talk) 03:51, June 21, 2020 (UTC)
  • Details of the changes between her appearances in Jedi and Mando can be included in Characteristics.
    • By changes, due you literally mean her appearance or her personality - AV-6R7Crew Pit 01:32, June 23, 2020 (UTC)
      • I was referring to the physical changes, yeah; the photoreceptors changing from yellow to white, the insignia on her chestplate disappearing, etc; I don't know if we can really say her personality changed. Maybe just note that she was unhelpful to Djarin. RattsT (talk) 16:47, June 23, 2020 (UTC)
        • Her photoreceptors were always white in RotJ, but merch had them as yellow which has tripped us up for years. I rewatched the scene recently and they're white like in Mando. I'll add the symbols disappearing. - AV-6R7Crew Pit 17:48, June 23, 2020 (UTC)
          • Added info about her markings disappearing between 4 and 9 ABY. - AV-6R7Crew Pit 18:54, June 24, 2020 (UTC)
  • Mando BTS can be expanded with "Connections" info.
    • Expanded. - AV-6R7Crew Pit 04:55, June 23, 2020 (UTC)
      • One minor thing, the clause of Mark voicing her should be as close as possible to the subject. RattsT (talk) 16:47, June 23, 2020 (UTC)
  • Some minor objections while the Inuse template remains up:
    • In the final paragraph of the "Fall of a criminal empire" section, it should be noted who tasked R2 with his task.
    • Threepio's "Don't leave me!" quote is missing his "Oh!"
      • Added, as well as context for the "Oh!". - AV-6R7Crew Pit 02:05, June 21, 2020 (UTC)
        • I don't think the context is really necessary. RattsT (talk) 02:15, June 21, 2020 (UTC)
          • I think it's fine since he audibly collides with something in the audio for the quote. - AV-6R7Crew Pit 02:59, June 21, 2020 (UTC)
    • Mark Hamill's name is misspelled in the "Connections" quote. RattsT (talk) 01:24, June 21, 2020 (UTC)
    • "Tiny and basis, they were allowed her…" seems to have some grammatical mistakes. RattsT (talk) 00:50, June 25, 2020 (UTC)
  • Redlinks should be created. RattsT (talk) 16:47, June 23, 2020 (UTC)
Braha'tok enthusiast
  • Regarding the large paragraphs in the Characteristics and BtS sections:
    • Characteristics–I would recommend making the last two paragraphs in the characteristics a separate sub-section about EV's mechanical aspects (as that's what those two paragraphs describe) comprising of three paragraphs.
    • BtS–The 13 line paragraph in the Conception and Portrayal part of the BtS should be split. It's looking very chunky. Braha'tok enthusiast (Hello there) 15:11, July 1, 2020 (UTC)
OOM

Comments

  • Just noting that she is in the reference book Star Wars: Extraordinary Droids, which I've added to the sources, but there doesn't appear to be any new information in her entry that you need to add. I haven't read it cover to cover yet, but I don't think she's mentioned elsewhere, since she's not in Artoo or Threepio's entry and 8D8 doesn't have an entry of his own. Toqgers (talk) 22:30, June 13, 2020 (UTC)
    • Thanks, I had no idea that book was a thing. - AV-6R7Crew Pit 05:46, June 14, 2020 (UTC)


Telosian Jedi Academy (Redux review)

  • Redux comments: Reduxed per Meeting 118.
  • Date added: October 4, 2020

(+0)

Support

Object

Imp
  • I'm not seeing the information from the image label on p. 31 of The Jedi Path presented in the article. Imperators II(Talk) 08:06, October 21, 2020 (UTC)
Tommy
  • I'd recommend subsectioning the BTS. Maybe something like Notable appearances and Alternate storylines?
  • Some date are lacking their own ref note. I'd like both of these to be confirmed:
    • Can 1000 BBY be sourced to The Jedi Path?
    • Can 3956 BBY be sourced to Jedi vs. Sith: The Essential Guide to the Force?
  • Please use — instead of —.
  • Dashes should not have spaces around them when used in prose. Tommy-Macaroni 12:41, 13 March 2021 (UTC)
    • All addressed. I've added a new ref for 1000 BBY, but 3956 BBY can be sourced to Jedi vs. Sith. OOM 224 ༼༽talk༼༽ 13:26, 13 March 2021 (UTC)

Comments

  • Updated article with Jedi vs Sith.
  • I'm also currently expanding the article with some missing information from the Prima guide. Will update here when finished. - - -OOM 224 ༼༽{talk}༼༽ 16:12, 23 October 2020 (UTC)


Maximian Ajax

  • Nominated by: Braha'tok enthusiast (Hello there) 13:51, October 7, 2020 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: I love Twilight Company for the range of soldier personalities that it offers, and Ajax is like that cocky soldier that loves cracking jokes at his comrades.

(0 Inqs/3 Users/3 Total)

(Votes required: 3 Inqvote(s) required to reach minimum. Additional 1 user or 1 Inq vote required to pass.)

Support

  1. Great work! VergenceScatter (talk) 16:13, 8 January 2021 (UTC)
  2. OOM 224 ༼༽{talk}༼༽ 09:22, 26 January 2021 (UTC)
  3. Objections handled via Discord. Nicely done! JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 22:47, 23 April 2021 (UTC)

Object

Shayanomer
  • At least one image can be added to the article, specifically the 61st's logo. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 10:29, October 11, 2020 (UTC)
    • Added the logo, not sure what else would really work as there's not many pictured things in Ajax's story. Braha'tok enthusiast (Hello there) 12:13, October 11, 2020 (UTC)
  • There is a new precedent to use one ref note for birth and death years (see Winshur Bratt). Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 18:54, October 17, 2020 (UTC)
  • Please check pre-release excerpts of the novel to see if Ajax appears in any of them. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 09:05, 23 March 2021 (UTC)
    • Objection handled via Discord. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 09:28, 24 March 2021 (UTC)
Vergence

Overall, a really solid article, but a couple of things:

  • Coyerti natives came to their aid. Since you were referring to Ajax alone earlier in the sentence, there is subject/verb disagreement here.
    • Fixed.
  • This phrase is a little confusing: he was one of five survivors when the infantry group was obliterated, over four perishing as a result. If you're saying that there were at least four other members in the 32nd infantry, I would argue that that is unnecessary, since companies always have more than nine members.
    • Fixed. It was meant to say "four hundred."
  • Howl is referred to by his first name a couple of times in the article body. VergenceScatter (talk) 05:34, 8 January 2021 (UTC)
OOM
  • Inconsistent capitalisation for "First Sergeant." - - -OOM 224 ༼༽{talk}༼༽ 15:25, 25 January 2021 (UTC)
    • How so? I only capitalise it as a title. Braha'tok enthusiast (Hello there) 23:09, 25 January 2021 (UTC)
      • Ah, sorry. Does the source use "first sergeant" as opposed to "First Sergeant" when mentioning the rank independently, without it being prefixed to Namir? - - -OOM 224 ༼༽{talk}༼༽ 23:31, 25 January 2021 (UTC)
        • It's not capitalised when used independently. For context, the rank is never used as a prefix for Namir, but he's mentioned to be a "first sergeant" at least twice—before and after all of Ajax's appearances. Braha'tok enthusiast (Hello there) 08:30, 26 January 2021 (UTC)
Toprawa
  • This is such an unspecific, ambiguous statement, they "made bad choices." What does this mean? "...where he and another soldier named Twitch made bad choices." Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 20:54, 26 January 2021 (UTC)
  • What does this mean, "have a chance at the governor"? Please clarify: "and speculated that she might have a chance at the governor."
  • What hunting trip? This needs some better explanation/clarification: "knowing Ajax was going to talk about his former lovers and their hunting trip."
  • In the "War stories" section quote, the audio clearly says "cannon" and not "cannons." Is this a discrepancy between the novel and audiobook? Additionally, you should fix that audio clip to eliminate the popping sounds where you edited out the narrations.
  • Again, context is needed here. Why is Sairgon begging them to stop wasting grenades? "and Lieutenant Sairgon, Evon's second-in-command, begged Ajax and his comrades to stop wasting grenades."
  • I was somewhat confused by the wording here, so I made an effort to clarify, but I'm not sure if this is perfectly accurate or not. Please confirm: "...setting up a choke point in one of the main passageways while most of the other squads pushed toward the engineering section to clear a path for..."
  • So was the Imperial freighter raid successful? The article never says.
  • I find the entirety of the P/T to be really poorly written. That section isn't telling me anything about the character's personality. All it's doing is just listing off several disjointed incidents with no flow or meaning. I feel like I'm reading a bulleted list of incidents without being given any real understanding of what it's supposed to mean with regard to this character's personality. Don't just jump from one event to the next without some transitioning. Use the P/T in the Winshur Bratt article as a model.
    • I've tried to structure it better. He doesn't have a detailed character development like Bratt so it's mainly his habits and preferences that I have to work with. Braha'tok enthusiast (Hello there) 20:40, 27 January 2021 (UTC)
  • Audio clip issues:
    • The clips in "A game of cards" and Skills and abilities should be cleaned up to remove the audible popping sounds where you edited out the narrations
      • Popping has now been removed from all of the audio used. Ayrehead02 (talk) 09:54, 1 February 2021 (UTC)
    • The Equipment section clip could use a cleaner fade out at the very end so that the cut isn't so tightly on the end of the word "grenades"
  • The Ajax's squad article suggests that this squad of his was in action during the Coyerti campaign, while this article only introduces the squad during the freighter raid. Which is correct? Additionally, that article goes into greater detail on the events of the Coyerti campaign, which I feel like this article insufficiently glosses over. Namely, things like the presence of a dozen other squads, being pinned down by the AT-ST, being rescued by the Coyerti, and lobbing grenades until begged to stop (which pretty much goes back to my previous objection asking for context on this). I'd like to see all of these details expanded on in this article. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 02:36, 27 January 2021 (UTC)
    • Ajax only refers to the people he was with on Coyerti as "us," so I've concluded that the info added to the squad article is assumption based. As for the dozen squads part, that was a confusion with this battle, for which I formally thought the target was the same as the garrison. I have removed all speculation. Braha'tok enthusiast (Hello there) 08:25, 27 January 2021 (UTC)
      • Ok, but were Ajax and his men or whoever pinned down by the AT-ST, and were they rescued by the Coyerti? That should be mentioned if so. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 22:46, 27 January 2021 (UTC)
        • The quote says the walker stared them down, which is why I used "confronted." As for the Coyerti, Ajax didn't say that they were rescuing the rebels, just that they arrived and left the garrison "on fire." Braha'tok enthusiast (Hello there) 23:13, 27 January 2021 (UTC)
  • With regards to your recent edit, you say that Namir was not the commanding officer of Twilight Company until well after Ajax's death. But the article explicitly introduces Namir as Ajax's commanding officer (First Sergeant Hazram Namir, the troopers' commanding officer...), which is why I added that detail into the Skills section. So which is it? Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 22:48, 27 January 2021 (UTC)
    • I missed that when reviewing OOM's copy-edits, apologies. For some extra context, the novel describes Namir's position as first sergeant as being a "high ranking grunt." It's corrected now. Braha'tok enthusiast (Hello there) 23:13, 27 January 2021 (UTC)
    • Objection(s) overridden by Inquisitorius 19:39, 4 May 2021 (UTC)

Comments

Dawson (Tynnan)

  • Nominated by: OtterSurf (talk) 13:38, 13 November 2020 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: Ooh, my first FA nomination! Again.

(0 Inqs/1 Users/1 Total)

(Votes required: 3 Inqvote(s) required to reach minimum. Additional 3 user or 2 Inq votes required to pass.)

Support

  1. Nice work. JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 21:47, 7 June 2021 (UTC)

Object

Tommy
  • My image quality objection from the last nomination doesn't seem to have been addressed. Tommy-Macaroni 09:57, 17 February 2021 (UTC)
    • There's nothing I can do on that front, sadly. I did try cropping the images from the PDF I obtained, but they look worse than what's here already. There's also no way to get a physical copy of the magazine in the UK. OtterSurf (talk) 10:09, 17 February 2021 (UTC)
      • Please check your Discord messages. Tommy-Macaroni 10:43, 17 February 2021 (UTC)
        • Thanks for the link; I was able to open the file with a CBR reader. Unfortunately the scan is extremely low-res. OtterSurf (talk) 11:07, 17 February 2021 (UTC)
          • Looking at it myself I think this scan offers a higher quality version of the image used in the body. Tommy-Macaroni 13:57, 17 February 2021 (UTC)
            • Okey-doke, then, I'll see what I can do. OtterSurf (talk) 14:02, 17 February 2021 (UTC)
            • Done. OtterSurf (talk) 15:21, 17 February 2021 (UTC)
Shayanomer
  • I'm noticing many instances of informal language in the body e.g. "Dawson preferred to play the game of water-wall and find ever more creative ways to cause explosions.," "Dawson was somewhat dismayed when he was apprised of the timeframe for the job." Please revise the article. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 07:05, 17 March 2021 (UTC)
  • Link to disambiguation page in the body ("the Bimm Ritinki"). Please resolve this.
    • No can do. The source doesn't specify the species of Bimm to which Ritinki belongs. OtterSurf (talk) 18:39, 12 April 2021 (UTC)
  • "...Noone's crew were to steal a valuable box from Guttu's rival, the Bimm Ritinki, at a meeting between him and Rodian kingpin Vop." Who's "him" referring to? Guttu or the rival?
  • Is "herdship" being lowercase supported by the source?
  • "He succeeded with a combination of fusion cutter and Nergon-14 explosive..." Did he use a single Nergon-14 explosive or multiple?
  • Are there no articles for the heist, Noone's crew, and the Ithorian vacsuit (this is also named inconsistently between the Biography and the Equipment sections)?
    • Fixed the vacsuit thing, I'll check on the articles. OtterSurf (talk) 18:56, 12 April 2021 (UTC)
    • Nope, no such articles exist. I take it they need to be created? OtterSurf (talk) 19:03, 12 April 2021 (UTC)
      • Done! OtterSurf (talk) 09:04, 20 April 2021 (UTC)
        • The crew needs to be added to the infobox Affiliations now. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 09:29, 20 April 2021 (UTC)
  • "He was also relatively strong..." Strong in what sense? Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 17:19, 12 April 2021 (UTC)
Macaroni
  • Can you crop the first body image a bit more? There are some unnecessary black borders.
    • The image was taken at an odd angle, so I'd be cutting too much of it out. OtterSurf (talk) 11:35, 5 May 2021 (UTC)
      • I don't think that's the case. Just a tiny bit off the right and left sides should do the trick.
  • Context is needed for Estimable Epicures.
  • Just checking—are there no more quotes for skills and abilities or equipment? JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 22:51, 4 May 2021 (UTC)
  • (Reviewing note) I added a period here as the caption was a full sentence. JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 15:29, 5 May 2021 (UTC)
  • I think TEA lists the Tynnani system and not Tynaa, so you need a "corresponding data" like you have on Ginder. JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 18:31, 24 May 2021 (UTC)
  • I get that it's the name of the OOU short story, but should "The Great Herdship Heist" really be fully capitalized when used IU?
    • It's just a heading. I'd leave it.
  • Is an article for blasting caps warranted? JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 21:14, 27 May 2021 (UTC)

Comments

Purrgil

(0 Inqs/2 Users/2 Total)

(Votes required: 3 Inqvote(s) required to reach minimum. Additional 2 user or 1 Inq vote required to pass.)

Support

  1. Looks good to me! Very well written and thorough with information. EthSch13 (talk) 17:39, 26 May 2021 (UTC)
  2. Support LucaRoR (talk) 10:54, 17 June 2021 (UTC)

Object

Shayanomer
  • My objections from the previous nomination are unaddressed, namely expanding the intro and investigating Poe Dameron: Free Fall and The Art of Star Wars Rebels.
  • Introduce some sectioning. You can at least split Rebels and pre-Rebels info.
  • "At some point, an artist encountered a group of purrgil. He later drew one of them in his journal and commented that he was surprised by their sudden appearance around his ship." This is sourced entirely to a date note. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 07:21, 7 December 2020 (UTC)
    • I've already expanded the intro, I get that you want me to expand it more, but currently I don't really know in which direction, so clarification on that point would be great. Free Fall and Art of Rebels have already been addressed as well.
      • You can briefly talk about physical features and behavior in the first paragraph, and talk about notable events in the second. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 09:21, 7 December 2020 (UTC)
        • Okay, I'll see what's the most relevant and not in the introduction yet. CanePlayz (talk) 10:02, 7 December 2020 (UTC)
          • Split and expanded the intro. I think it should be good now. CanePlayz (talk) 16:04, 13 December 2020 (UTC)
    • Regarding the intro? Then I would also know what to expand upon (Rebels stuff since that is not enough yet to have its own section).
      • No, the History section. Introductions are meant to briefly summarize the contents of the article to the reader. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 09:21, 7 December 2020 (UTC)
        • Oh okay, so the stuff we talked about earlier. At first I thought you meant splitting the intro into two paragraphs but now I get it. CanePlayz (talk) 10:02, 7 December 2020 (UTC)
          • The intro can use that split after you've sufficiently expanded it with the requested details. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 10:05, 7 December 2020 (UTC)
            • Sure, I was planning on that. CanePlayz (talk) 10:06, 7 December 2020 (UTC)
              • Should be done, that's the best way of sectioning that I was able to come up with. CanePlayz (talk) 13:28, 13 December 2020 (UTC)
    • Fixed. CanePlayz (talk) 09:16, 7 December 2020 (UTC)
  • Per precedent on species Featured articles, the skins colors should be presented as a bulleted list.
  • "Some of them were as large as a small starship while the size of others reached up to massive." This isn't grammatically sound.
    • Changed, hope the new one is fine. CanePlayz (talk) 23:15, 26 December 2020 (UTC)
  • Please connect Hera Syndulla with the Spectres in the intro.
    • Added a connection to Hera and Ezra regarding the Spectres. CanePlayz (talk) 23:15, 26 December 2020 (UTC)
  • "Purrgil ranged in size from as large as a small starship to massive..." This also isn't grammatically sound.
    • Changed, hope the new one is fine. CanePlayz (talk) 23:15, 26 December 2020 (UTC)
  • "Although few people actually witnessed their special ability to attain lightspeed, the purrgil became the stuff of legend for smugglers and pilots across the galaxy." Although this wording is used in the source, the tone is not "encyclopedic."
  • Context for Han Solo and Tivoche Bilure.
    • Added some context. Let me know if you want more. CanePlayz (talk) 23:15, 26 December 2020 (UTC)
  • Tivoche Bilure's journal also needs an article. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 07:23, 26 December 2020 (UTC)
Prelate Vergence
  • The sentence One of those leaders was referred to as the Purrgil King,[12] another one was called Purrgil Ultra is grammatically incorrect.
    • At first I didn't know what the issue was (probably because I'm not a native English speaker), but it was pointed out to me that the second part should not follow a comma as it's an independent sentence so I seperated them with a semicolon instead. CanePlayz (talk) 10:00, 7 January 2021 (UTC)
      • I'll try to be more clear in the future.
  • completely wiped out Thrawn's Seventh Fleet blockade of Lothal and damaged three Star Destroyers—The fleet wasn't completely wiped out if several ships were only damaged.VergenceScatter (talk) 05:36, 7 January 2021 (UTC)
    • They wiped out the blockade which consisted of most of the Seventh Fleet and damaged three star destroyers which were also part of the Fleet but were hovering above the city (they were not part of the blockade). But I see that my formulation there was unclear. I've rephrased bit now, let me know if you are fine with it, should at least help to make the distinction clearer! CanePlayz (talk) 10:00, 7 January 2021 (UTC)
Macaroni
Tommy
  • Contractions should never be used in formal writing.
    • All of them should be gone by now. CanePlayz (talk) 19:12, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
  • Please utilise the Oxford comma in your writing.
    • I wasn't really aware of how that is done in English, should be good now. CanePlayz (talk) 19:12, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
  • Missing some context in quite a few places. Who are Mart, Wolffe, and Vizago? Who is Thrawn and what is the 7th fleet (some info on which is intro exclusive). What is Lothal? What is the Graf Archive? You get the idea. Please go through the article and give context to proper nouns if it's unclear what they are.
    • I've added some context, I hope I got everything. CanePlayz (talk) 19:12, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
  • I appreciate your use of "cold embrace," but I don't think it applies to Ezra, only Thrawn was trapped.
    • You're right, that slipped in somehow. CanePlayz (talk) 19:12, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
  • Please link to Purrgil King. Tommy-Macaroni 13:45, 7 March 2021 (UTC)
    • I forgot to add that link back after I'd restructured something. It's back now. CanePlayz (talk) 19:12, 16 March 2021 (UTC)

Comments

Ben Quadinaros

  • Nominated by: Ayrehead02 (talk) 20:24, 6 February 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: An extremely late birthday present for Fred! Thanks to Corellian Premier for providing information from the Insider's Guide.

(1 Inqs/4 Users/5 Total)

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Support

  1. Inqvote.png Objections handled via IRC. Thanks for the birthday gift! MasterFredCommerce Guild.svg(talk) 21:00, 27 March 2021 (UTC)
  2. Very enjoyable read. JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 19:09, 1 April 2021 (UTC)
  3. My all-time favourite podracer OOM 224 ༼༽talk༼༽ 11:20, 4 April 2021 (UTC)
  4. Ben? Ben Quadinaros? Commander Code-8 Hello There! 03:54, 12 April 2021 (UTC)
  5. And the award for "most improved podracer" goes to… DwartiiDelver (talk) 04:50, 2 May 2021 (UTC)

Object

Macaroni
OOM
  • "produced under the name Codenka Mafurias, which was assumed to be the alias of an art workshop bankrolled by Marlo the Hutt." Assumed by who?
  • The two instances of Ben cursing can be mentioned in the article body.
  • "Quadinaros has appeared in various non-canon LEGO media, most prominently featuring in […]" Citation needed.
  • Whichever language Ben speaks in The Freemaker Adventures should be mentioned in the LEGO subsection, and the language he speaks in TPM should be mentioned in Personality and traits. OOM 224 ༼༽talk༼༽ 10:24, 28 February 2021 (UTC)
    • No source has clarified what language he's speaking in either appearance. I've added that he spoke something other than basic. Ayrehead02 (talk) 11:19, 28 February 2021 (UTC)
  • It's worth mentioning his three antennae in the Personality and traits section. There's little visual depictions of Toong in canon other than Ben himself, and other sources I've seen depict Toong without antennae. OOM 224 ༼༽talk༼༽ 11:27, 28 February 2021 (UTC)
  • Inconsistency between "Quadinaros'" and "Quadinaros's"
  • "Later career" could use a brief description of the locale depicted in the Ben v Sebulba poster. I also think that the language of the poster should be mentioned.
    • I've added the landscape but the fact that poster is in aurebesh is something that I feel can just be included on the poster's page. Ayrehead02 (talk) 10:01, 4 April 2021 (UTC)
  • While this isn't said in any policy, I think the MOS clause "quotes taken from comics should not mimic emphasized boldfaced wording. Instead, only italics are to be used for emphasis." should apply for an IU poster such as the one mentioned above, so I think "edge" should be italicised in the *"Later career" quote.
  • The Sport's Greatest Rivalry should be italicised.
  • I'm not sure about including the TCW poster in the BTS section. That's not significant in terms of the development of the character.
  • Also, I think that first BTS paragraph should be split into two for better readability. OOM 224 ༼༽talk༼༽ 20:28, 3 April 2021 (UTC)
    • Done, also added some bits and pieces I discovered that I'd missed while researching Dud Bolt. Ayrehead02 (talk) 10:01, 4 April 2021 (UTC)
Dwartii
  • "As other racers took flight"—is there any precedent for "flight" (or flying in general) being used in reference to podracers? It just reads a little strangely to me. DwartiiDelver (talk) 04:31, 21 April 2021 (UTC)
    • I'm fairly certain there is, but I've reworded it anyway. Ayrehead02 (talk) 20:05, 30 April 2021 (UTC)
Shayanomer
  • The Clone Wars set needs to be listed in Sources if it mentions the character. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 16:47, 23 May 2021 (UTC)

Comments

Vizam

  • Nominated by: Ayrehead02 (talk) 23:34, 9 February 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: Having spotted Vizam lurking in the shadows in a new scene, it seems like the right time for my first film GAN to move up to the big leagues.

(1 Inqs/4 Users/5 Total)

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Support

  1. Commander Code-8 Hello There! 04:11, 6 April 2021 (UTC)
  2. OOM 224 ༼༽talk༼༽ 16:30, 9 April 2021 (UTC)
  3. Inqvote.png MasterFredCommerce Guild.svg(talk) 05:50, 9 June 2021 (UTC)
  4. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 07:07, 9 June 2021 (UTC)
  5. Braha'tok enthusiast (Hello there) 08:48, 23 June 2021 (UTC)

Object

OOM
  • Are the refs "SW:CV" and "Complete Cross-Sections" referring to the same source? OOM 224 ༼༽talk༼༽ 16:15, 9 April 2021 (UTC)
    • They are indeed, good catch. Ayrehead02 (talk) 16:27, 9 April 2021 (UTC)
Shayanomer
  • Does Geektionary identify Kintan as a planet?
    • Apparently the homeworlds given in the French version are given as "Home planet". Ayrehead02 (talk) 22:53, 7 June 2021 (UTC)
  • I personally think you should mention the outcome of the event since it involves the vehicle that the character was on.
  • From looking at the toy, I do think it's speculative to say that he "sometimes" carried a blaster pistol. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 07:36, 7 June 2021 (UTC)
    • I added the sometimes because he doesn't have the pistol and holster in the film, but does on the toy. I can remove the sometimes if you like, but I don't think it's speculative. Ayrehead02 (talk) 22:53, 7 June 2021 (UTC)
      • Sure, something else in its place would suffice, such as "at one point" or "on at least one occasion." Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 07:21, 8 June 2021 (UTC)
Macaroni

Comments

Unidentified Republic soldier (Falang Minor)

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Support

  1. Cool stuff, feels like a World War Z character. Commander Code-8 Hello There! 03:39, 12 April 2021 (UTC)
  2. A very interesting read. Excellent work in prosifying the info. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 08:30, 7 June 2021 (UTC)

Object

Comments

Hintaro/Legends

  • Nominated by: Imperators II(Talk) 10:46, 17 February 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: 1003 words by my count. Also, of course this is merely a knockoff of Tope's Kintaro FA.

(1 Inqs/4 Users/5 Total)

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Support

  1. Inqvote.png Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 21:30, 24 March 2021 (UTC)
  2. Reminds me of the time my friends worked out how to play Liar's Dice from Pirates of the Caribbean for some reason.Commander Code-8 Hello There! 12:41, 31 March 2021 (UTC)
  3. AmazinglyCool CIS roundel.svg (talk) 13:44, 31 May 2021 (UTC)
  4. Objection handled via Discord. DwartiiDelver (talk) 22:32, 5 June 2021 (UTC)
  5. Well done.--Liverpool92Ackbar HS.jpg 11:28, 10 June 2021 (UTC)

Object

Comments

  • I've created articles for the hintaro die and the hintaron role, but not for the individual symbols on the dice or the winning combinations. Those I've turned into redirects to this article. Imperators II(Talk) 10:46, 17 February 2021 (UTC)
  • You could have an image of Keth or Bespin in the history section and one of a chance cube in the description, or is there a reason you haven't included any? Commander Code-8 Hello There! 12:16, 31 March 2021 (UTC)


S-R6

  • Nominated by: Imperators II(Talk) 12:57, 1 April 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: While writing the Trevura article, this guy just grew on me.

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Support

  1. A very interesting read OOM 224 ༼༽talk༼༽ 21:36, 3 April 2021 (UTC)
  2. Fan26 (Talk) 16:52, 19 April 2021 (UTC)
  3. Cool stuff. JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 15:14, 30 April 2021 (UTC)

Object

OOM
  • Could use some variation with the word "eventually"
    • Should be better now.
  • I'm assuming that the source doesn't say Essar escaped from Trevura, only that he escaped, so I think it's best that the article specifies that Essar escaped from his hideout. Otherwise, readers might think the intent was that Essar left the planet. OOM 224 ༼༽talk༼༽ 08:13, 3 April 2021 (UTC)
Fan
Macaroni
  • Just one—"the streets of Trevura's city Voma" implies to me that Voma was the only city, which is unlikely. JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 01:08, 30 April 2021 (UTC)
    • Granted, I'm not a native speaker, but that's certainly not how it sounds to me. Does "the Star Wars film A New Hope" make it sound to you like it's the only Star Wars film? Does "The H. G. Wells novel The War of the Worlds" make it sound to you like it's his only novel? Imperators II(Talk) 08:24, 30 April 2021 (UTC)
      • I think those two are different examples--for one, I already know Star Wars to be a series of multiple films. When you use "the" for the second example, I know you're referring to a specific novel, but "Trevura's city Voma" does not use "the" when referring to the city, which implies to me that there isn't a need to be specific, as that's the only one. Hopefully that makes sense. JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 14:46, 30 April 2021 (UTC)
        • I suppose it doesn't, really, but I've opted to just reword the thing instead of trying to argue it further. Imperators II(Talk) 15:12, 30 April 2021 (UTC)

Comments

Blue Max

  • Nominated by: IFYLOFD (Talk) 02:58, 8 April 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: Yeah why the hell not man let's get it rolling

(1 Inqs/4 Users/5 Total)

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Support

  1. D MCCG D MCCGstpatricksday.png (chat) 21:31, 28 April 2021 (UTC)
  2. Great to see your name on this page! JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 02:24, 20 May 2021 (UTC)
  3. AmazinglyCool CIS roundel.svg (talk) 11:43, 30 May 2021 (UTC)
  4. Inqvote.png Can't wait for more! MasterFredCommerce Guild.svg(talk) 20:47, 3 June 2021 (UTC)
  5. Good work. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 07:14, 7 June 2021 (UTC)

Object

Shayanomer
  • Infobox-exclusive information.
  • It's unnecessary to specify "None" for armaments.
  • To fit with the Oasis skin, article can really use some paragraph breaks, which will make way for more subsectioning.
    • Still needs subsectioning. The second-to-last Biography paragraph can be cut down. See Simus to understand how this should look. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 20:27, 10 April 2021 (UTC)
      • Done. IFYLOFD (Talk) 03:46, 16 April 2021 (UTC)
        • Looking better, "Signing on with Han Solo" and "Hunting the slavers" can be subsectioned further. Are there more images you can add? Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 05:45, 16 April 2021 (UTC)
          • I personally don't think it's necessary, but done. There's not really much left there for images. IFYLOFD (Talk) 22:00, 26 April 2021 (UTC)
  • Date cannot be sourced straight to the novel.
    • A note specific to the events of the novel and the character would be appreciated, look to Simus again as well as Krdys Mordi to see how it should read. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 20:27, 10 April 2021 (UTC)
      • I personally don't see why that's necessary. The date is directly found in the Reader's Companion. There's no real elaboration to give. IFYLOFD (Talk) 21:25, 12 April 2021 (UTC)
  • Abridged audiobooks for Rebel Dawn and New Jedi Order will need to be checked for mentions, while unabridged audiobooks (1, 2, 3) should presumably be listed in Appearances.
    • I'm assuming he's mentioned in those audiobooks since the templates are missing. Also, nothing in the abridged versions? Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 20:27, 10 April 2021 (UTC)
      • I haven't found any indication that he's mentioned in the abridged versions. Do you know of any good way to access them? IFYLOFD (Talk) 21:19, 12 April 2021 (UTC)
  • Missing full comic publication date.
    • Can this be sourced straight to the comic? It also needs to include the day as well per Layout Guide. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 20:27, 10 April 2021 (UTC)
      • Since it's a comic strip, yes, it should be self-sourcing. Day added. IFYLOFD (Talk) 22:06, 18 April 2021 (UTC)
  • Missing {{1stp}}. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 06:28, 8 April 2021 (UTC)
    • All of these should be addressed. IFYLOFD (Talk) 20:12, 10 April 2021 (UTC)
  • "Jessa had established contact with a covert cell of concerned citizens investigating similar disappearances throughout the Corporate Sector: led by an academic named Rekkon, who was searching for his vanished nephew, the group had slowly infiltrated a Corporate Sector Authority Data Center on Orron III that they believed could point them to the locations of the missing." It's not immediately clear who or what Rekkon is leading and the whole sentence feels like a run-on.
  • "However, things quickly went awry when they arrived on Dellalt: a local gang leader named J'uoch, also after the treasure, ambushed them as they went for the log-recorder. Although Blue Max used his link into the Falcon's weapons systems to make things a fight for the outnumbered crew, J'uoch's gang forced them to retreat and stole the Millennium Falcon." Unencyclopedic tone, please reword. There might be more instances throughout the article that I missed while copy-editing.
    • Just curious: in what way are those phrases not "encyclopedic tone?" They're not using colloquialisms, they're (I think accurately) describing what actually happened. In what way would you reword them to be more encyclopedic? IFYLOFD (Talk) 13:41, 2 May 2021 (UTC)
      • In formal writing, words like "things" are avoided as they "feel" informal. For example, in the first instance, you can say something like "the situation turned unfavorable for the crew." For the second phrase, you may want to specify that Max utilized the weapons system to help the crew out. "Make things a fight for the crew" doesn't make it clear why Max did so in the first place. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 14:10, 2 May 2021 (UTC)
  • Are there no articles for the events described here? Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 11:39, 28 April 2021 (UTC)
    • These should hopefully be addressed. IFYLOFD (Talk) 23:38, 4 May 2021 (UTC)
  • Can you link Liberation of Stars' End somewhere in the article body? It's currently only linked in the intro. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 06:48, 20 May 2021 (UTC)
    • Should be linked in both now. IFYLOFD (Talk) 02:29, 25 May 2021 (UTC)
Macaroni
  • "Their dramatic escape spat them out in the foothills beneath J'uoch's camp." This feels a bit unencyclopedic.
  • "Skynx offered Blue Max and Bollux jobs on the spot helping him sift through the Queen of Ranroon and the two droids accepted on the spot, officially parting ways with Solo and Chewbacca." Can you vary the wording so it doesn't repeat "on the spot" twice in a row?
  • Is his learning of dejarik something that can be mentioned in the biography?
  • {{CSWECite}} should not be used in the sources section, as Blue Max has his own entry. JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 21:17, 28 April 2021 (UTC)
    • These should be addressed. IFYLOFD (Talk) 23:38, 4 May 2021 (UTC)
  • Can you add some context for Orron III?
  • "Fortunately, in a matter of microseconds..." This needs to keep a NPOV.
  • Those are (hopefully) my last two, good stuff. JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 21:24, 12 May 2021 (UTC)
    • Should be done. IFYLOFD (Talk) 23:05, 19 May 2021 (UTC)
Fred strikes back
  • It feels damn good seeing you back on the FAN. :)
    • Good to be back, my dude.
  • I think Max's internal conflict over destroying the war droids needs a mention in "Characteristics."
  • Here's my copy-edit for some minor grammatical fixes. Great work, and I can't wait to see more! MasterFredCommerce Guild.svg(talk) 07:01, 1 June 2021 (UTC)
    • Should be done. Thanks Fred IFYLOFD (Talk) 00:54, 3 June 2021 (UTC)

Comments

  • Just a note about a tool that I'm not sure you're aware of. On the bottom toolbar under "My Tools," you can have it highlight duplicate links. It automatically separates the intro, body, and refs, so you can see if something is linked twice in any of those three areas. I've gone ahead and removed the duplicate link to The galaxy/Legends. MasterFredCommerce Guild.svg(talk) 06:04, 22 April 2021 (UTC)
  • Another thing to note: italicized links should be like this: [[Millennium Falcon/Legends|''Millennium Falcon'']] as opposed to like ''[[Millennium Falcon/Legends|Millennium Falcon]]'' per WP:MOS#Formatting. JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 03:26, 28 April 2021 (UTC)


Alaris Prime colonial war

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Support

Object

Fan
  • The Thalmussen should be contexualized as a transport.
  • "[Attichitcuk] established a small camp north of the landing site, leaving behind markers so that his fellow Wookiees could find him easily" I would say "...the other Wookiees" works better. Less wordy is always a good choice.
  • "Shortly afterwards a Trade Federation B1 battle droid named OOL-2 discovered the remains of the power core destroyed by Chewbacca and Shoran and reported its destruction to the Trade Federation Viceroy Nute Gunray, attributing the destruction to the gundarks." "the destruction" -> "it". Again, less wordy is probably better.
  • "With a force of eleven Wookiees, including Chewbacca,[7] the Wookiees marched towards Attichitcuk's position," I reccomend switching to "A force of eleven Wookiees, including Chewbacca, marched..." Fan26 (Talk) 17:16, 19 April 2021 (UTC)
Macaroni
  • Ref four needs to be fully linked.
    • Done.
  • Can you please explain why the war starts with the Attack on Attichitcuk's camp? The switch from the prelude to the war is not entirely clear.
    • Because the conflict has three factions and that attack is the earliest battle between any of them.
  • It seems that Death/Legends can be linked earlier than it currently is in body.
    • That spot?
      • Eh, eradicate makes more sense, actually. Not sure what I was thinking of.
  • "which was granted and subsequently constructed in Chewbacca's camp" implies that the permission was constructed.
    • Moved the construction part to the next sentence.
  • "...Wookiees' final assault on the Trade Federation's main base, which was known as the Battle for Alaris Prime" -- I see what you're trying to say here, but it almost seems like the base was known as the Battle for Alaris Prime.
    • Well the icon for the level is just the TF fortress, so you may have blown this thing wide open. I think that's clearer
  • "Jinn landed on Alaris Prime" -- wait, he wasn't on the moon the entire time?
    • So he gives instructions remotely the entire time, which I mentioned in the first landings section and I thought that was enough. However, I've changed it to the say he arrived at the base because his transmissions to the Jedi Council at the start of the campaign are made from Alaris Prime, so he was probably either in orbit or another location until the last battle. Commander Code-8 Hello There! 09:16, 11 June 2021 (UTC)
  • Take a look at this copy-edit for a few places that needed and didn't need commas. JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 19:21, 10 June 2021 (UTC)

Comments

Larry

  • Nominated by: Cwedin(talk) 21:25, 13 April 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: Larry, from the planet Brooklyn.

(0 Inqs/3 Users/3 Total)

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Support

  1. "I once knew a man with three eyes, purple fur, clinical depression, and a nose like Wario." "Ooh, what did you call him?" "…Larry." Commander Code-8 Hello There! 11:50, 16 April 2021 (UTC)
  2. You forgot to mention his flashlight in the equipment section. :P JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 04:04, 20 April 2021 (UTC)
  3. AmazinglyCool (talk) 16:08, 21 April 2021 (UTC)

Object

CC-8
  • Can the timeline reference really be used to source all of the first half of the first paragraph?
    • Good catch, fixed.
  • I think the physical description in the P&T should elaborate on the position of his eyes, how two were in his face while one was in an upper stalk. Commander Code-8 Hello There! 14:59, 14 April 2021 (UTC)
  • The distinct colour on his arms and foot could be mentioned as well, is there anything to indicate that they are hairy too? Commander Code-8 Hello There! 00:17, 15 April 2021 (UTC)
    • I've been treating it all as skin, since the model sheet just has the label "flesh." - Cwedin(talk) 02:25, 15 April 2021 (UTC)
  • I know I've voted support but I just noticed that Larry's tribe should be linked in affiliations. Commander Code-8 Hello There! 11:57, 23 June 2021 (UTC)
Macaroni
  • Can you mention his gender in the intro?
    • Done.
  • Do you think it's worth mentioning the blanket in the equipment section? JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 19:48, 19 April 2021 (UTC)

Comments

Ginivex-class fanblade starfighter

  • Nominated by: DwartiiDelver (talk) 18:36, 18 April 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: Always loved this ship. Also, my first FAN!

(0 Inqs/2 Users/2 Total)

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Support

  1. Commander Code-8 Hello There! 06:33, 11 May 2021 (UTC)
  2. SecretSpyer (talk)

Object

Macaroni

Preliminaries:

  • History could benefit from subsectioning.
    • Would you have any recommendations on how best to subsection it? I'm not entirely sure, considering practically all of it is about the Battle of Sullust. Perhaps section the final paragraph separately since that is after the battle rather than during it?
  • 1250 vs. 1,250 inconsistency.
    • Changed to just 1,250
  • It seems a bit odd that you say only six starfighters. Why would she need more than one? JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 00:34, 27 April 2021 (UTC)
    • That's just what the source states. That detail is originally from Legends (in some stories Ventress would lose one of her fanblades and then still have another one later on). DwartiiDelver (talk) 00:42, 27 April 2021 (UTC)
CC-8
  • First sentence should be broken in two.
    • Broken
  • Color can just be pipelinked the first time a color is mentioned, using the word itself is unnecessary in that sentence.
    • Done
  • The image in Characteristics should be bigger, I can't tell what's in it without magnifying it.
    • Better?
  • Sith needs to be linked in the body.
    • Linked
  • Since you mention in characteristics that force users could do flips and shit you should mention later that Ventress was a force user. Commander Code-8 Hello There! 00:11, 9 May 2021 (UTC)

Comments

Battle for Alaris Prime

  • Nominated by: Commander Code-8 Hello There! 09:56, 7 May 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: I can't tell if this campaign is meant to have a pro or anti-colonialism stance.

(0 Inqs/1 Users/1 Total)

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Support

  1. Good work, almost done with this whole colonial war. JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 04:43, 20 June 2021 (UTC)

Object

Battle of Macaroni
  • I hate to break it to you, but it seems that the full release dates for GB and the Prima guide are needed since they came out on different days of the same year, per WP:LG#Publication dates. JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 00:02, 18 June 2021 (UTC)
    • Got a whole new citation template for it (and many thanks to the users who fixed it when I didn't know what I was doing). I'll get some feedback on the date referencing first before implementing it in every article I've ever written. Commander Code-8 Hello There! 19:04, 19 June 2021 (UTC)

Comments

Unidentified Trade Federation base

  • Nominated by: Commander Code-8 Hello There! 14:00, 9 May 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: Screw it, I will max out all my possible nominations until I get too busy for editing regularly

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Support

  1. Good job! ~ D MCCG D MCCG.png (chat) 23:33, 9 May 2021 (UTC)
  2. Reviewed on Discord. Note that I have given Code until 2030 to finish Operation Galactic Battlegrounds. JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 00:32, 10 May 2021 (UTC)
  3. DwartiiDelver (talk) 22:16, 14 May 2021 (UTC)
  4. Well done.--Liverpool92Ackbar HS.jpg 15:30, 27 May 2021 (UTC)

Object

Dwartii
  • In the final paragraph of the History section, there are two back-to-back sentences that begin with "With". I think it'd be preferable to try and change one of these so it's not quite as repetitive. DwartiiDelver (talk) 03:33, 14 May 2021 (UTC)

Comments

  • Just a note on the history quote, I can't find that exact audio file that matches what appears in the level, there's one that matches the quote almost entirely with the small difference of calling the fortress a "government center." If anyone else with the game can find the proper one in case it's just my version being weird, that would be great. Commander Code-8 Hello There! 14:22, 9 May 2021 (UTC)


Graak (lawbreaker)

  • Nominated by: JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 15:25, 25 May 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: My first FAN! Might I ask the Inquisitorius to learn from Graak's tale and strive to be teh compassion, and not teh evil. :P

(1 Inqs/3 Users/4 Total)

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Support

  1. Inqvote.png Reviewed via discord, very nice work. Congratulations on the first FA nom! Supreme Emperor Holocomm 04:41, 30 May 2021 (UTC)
  2. Well done.Liverpool92Ackbar HS.jpg 15:55, 31 May 2021 (UTC)
  3. Headcanon: Simon cut his eye out. Commander Code-8 Hello There! 02:40, 1 June 2021 (UTC)
  4. Graak could've fought off the Sanyassans single-handedly. DwartiiDelver (talk) 16:04, 6 June 2021 (UTC)

Object

CC-8

Comments

  • Big thanks to Amino for providing me with digital images. JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 15:25, 25 May 2021 (UTC)
  • I will be away for the next two weeks and therefore not he able to address objections; feel free to list them, but I'm asking the Inquisitorious not to take down this nom. JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 02:51, 21 June 2021 (UTC)


Atrisian Commonwealth

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Support

  1. Commander Code-8 Hello There! 08:16, 3 June 2021 (UTC)
  2. Love me some Atlas-based lore. Fan26 (Talk) 18:50, 9 June 2021 (UTC)
  3. JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 23:10, 18 June 2021 (UTC)

Object

Comments

Battle of Columus

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Support

  1. Love me some ancient Jedi wars. Commander Code-8 Hello There! 02:44, 7 June 2021 (UTC)
  2. JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 01:34, 14 June 2021 (UTC)
  3. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 10:39, 16 June 2021 (UTC)

Object

CC-8
  • Context for Corulag.
    • I think adding the fact that Corulag was a Core Worlds planet right in the next sentence after it is stated that the Jedi pursued the Legions of Lettow to the Core Worlds would be super redundant.
      • As someone not familiar with that geography, I was reading it as the Corulag event was a separate thing from the war reaching the Core Worlds. Could adding something like "There, on Corulag" make it clearer? Commander Code-8 Hello There! 11:21, 6 June 2021 (UTC)
        • Sure, added.
  • The sentence it's in runs on too, and it should be explicit that Corulag is in the Core Worlds
    • Split up the sentence.
  • The fact that they fought with lightsabers deserves a mention. Commander Code-8 Hello There! 09:33, 6 June 2021 (UTC)
    • They didn't—canonically lightsabers weren't invented for another ten thousand years—and I'm assuming that it's merely visual effects due to crystal-colored (canonical fact) Force-imbued blades being swinged around. Imperators II(Talk) 09:43, 6 June 2021 (UTC)
      • My bad, I had skimmed over the part where you mentioned those. However, at the moment it only specifies that Pina had that weapon. Commander Code-8 Hello There! 11:21, 6 June 2021 (UTC)
        • Why, do you think that all battles should detail all the weapons wielded by their participants?
          • Why wouldn't we? It's relevant information, especially in this case where a reader could make a similar assumption about the weapons based on the image as I did. Commander Code-8 Hello There! 16:33, 6 June 2021 (UTC)
            • I've added it here due to the potential for confusion. But if you imagine some of the larger battles, such as Hoth or Endor, you'll see why it's an absurd principle to try and apply generally. Imperators II(Talk) 16:43, 6 June 2021 (UTC)
              • Yeah fair enough, I was using the mindset I write my own battle articles with, where there's only been five at most. Commander Code-8 Hello There! 02:44, 7 June 2021 (UTC)
  • Why's the BTS image not on the left? Commander Code-8 Hello There! 11:21, 6 June 2021 (UTC)
    • Because lone images in BTS almost never look good left-aligned, and this is no exception. The spirit of the Layout Guide rule you're implicitly referring to is that on long articles images should not all be aligned along one side. You will notice that at least on recent quality articles BTS images are consistently right-aligned. Imperators II(Talk) 15:36, 6 June 2021 (UTC)
      • Not totally sure that I get it but turns out the LG is pretty soft in regards to image alignment, so I'll strike. Commander Code-8 Hello There! 16:33, 6 June 2021 (UTC)
        • The bottom line is that it never looks good to have a left-aligned image at the very start of the BTS. Imperators II(Talk) 16:43, 6 June 2021 (UTC)

Comments


Fideltin Rusk

  • Nominated by: Cade StupidRepublicEmblem-Traced-TORkit.svg Calrayn 03:54, 5 June 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments:

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Support

  1. Nice to have you back, Cade. VergenceScatter (talk) 15:42, 22 June 2021 (UTC)
  2. Great job. OtterSurf (talk) 11:28, 24 June 2021 (UTC)

Object

CC-8
  • Current standards favour much shorter subsections due to the death of Monobook, which you can see throughout other current noms or recent FAs.Commander Code-8 Hello There! 04:16, 7 June 2021 (UTC)
    • Per discussion on Discord the recommendations were that sectioning should follow natural divisions of content, so I guess the ones in the biography section are okay. I was going to suggest subsectioning the Bts but I can't find a break that wouldn't only leave one paragraph behind. Commander Code-8 Hello There! 09:30, 8 June 2021 (UTC)
  • If commander is not given as his actual rank those links should pipelink to Commanding officer/Legends instead.
    • Done.
  • Time on Hoth: May be my weary eyes but I can't tell which decade is being referred to in the first sentence
    • Updated the Mindor/end of war stuff in the paragraph above, and the paragraph below, to include dates.
  • Neither of his parents are currently linked. Commander Code-8 Hello There! 09:30, 8 June 2021 (UTC)
  • The exact date behind the year isn't necessary per the Layout Guide. Commander Code-8 Hello There! 11:58, 14 June 2021 (UTC)
  • I think describing the info given from the encyclopedia in the Bts is unnecessary.
  • I'll have to check some youtube videos later, are there notable differences in how Rusk interacts with the player in Fallen Empire if they're continuing playing as the Jedi Master as opposed to other classes? Commander Code-8 Hello There! 02:46, 22 June 2021 (UTC)
      • Nothing too special. Doesn't talk much about the time jump. Cade StupidRepublicEmblem-Traced-TORkit.svg Calrayn 14:15, 22 June 2021 (UTC)
        • "Stars, it's good to see your face. Sorry about the undignified welcome. They don't make leashes tight enough for this lot."
        • "I'm glad to see you too. It seems like you've climbed the ranks since I've been gone."
        • "There are very few people who would choose this command, but I'm honored to shoulder the burden for the good of the Republic."
Vergence

Comments

Dromund Kaas operation

  • Nominated by: Cade StupidRepublicEmblem-Traced-TORkit.svg Calrayn 04:08, 5 June 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: Resubmitting this one; it was removed by Tope because of my absence and some unconfirmed changes (which I've since reviewed and am fine with)

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Support

Object

CC-8 operation
  • The intro says that the galaxy at large believed the Emperor's death, but later on says that it was secret for two years.
    • Clarified.
  • The prelude and galaxy at large could use an image, and the operation could do with subsectioning
    • Images added, but there's really no place to subsection, as I'd have to put it in the middle of the GameLS section - which needs to be grouped because it's all about the same part of the event - or at the start of it, and that leaves a 2-paragraph part preceding it.
  • Is Scourge's vision of the Hero standing over the Emperor not technically an appearance for this event? Commander Code-8 Hello There! 03:49, 22 June 2021 (UTC)
    • Fair point. Updated. Cade StupidRepublicEmblem-Traced-TORkit.svg Calrayn 14:47, 22 June 2021 (UTC)

Comments

Sajar

  • Nominated by: Cade StupidRepublicEmblem-Traced-TORkit.svg Calrayn 04:32, 5 June 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: Another former Featured Article; ecks's objections from the review have been satisfied.

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Support

  1. JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 17:31, 13 June 2021 (UTC)
  2. OtterSurf (talk) 11:35, 24 June 2021 (UTC)

Object

Macaroni
  • You're in Category:TOR dates usages without act argument, whatever that means.
    • Done.
  • Can 3653 BBY actually be sourced to ref 1?
    • Resourced.
  • Could use an equipment section to discuss his lightsaber and clothing, which is currently being done in skills and abilities.
    • Ehhhh.... done, but frankly it looks rather terrible separate from the P&T.
  • Spaces should be replaced by underscores in filenames (e.g. [[File:Luke_Skywalker.jpg]] instead of [[File:Luke Skywalker.jpg]]).
    • Done.
  • The first P+T paragraph can probably be split into two, it's quite large.
    • Done.
  • Some context for Nar Shaddaa in the Bts would be nice. JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 19:46, 10 June 2021 (UTC)

Comments

Attack on Fondor

  • Nominated by: Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 08:52, 5 June 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: First time doing a battle longer than CA length. I decided not to include info from "Destroyer Down" as the battle in that story is pretty much unrelated to this one.

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Support

  1. JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Talk) 18:48, 14 June 2021 (UTC)

Object

Average Battlefront enjoyer
Macaroni

Comments


Revan

  • Nominated by: Cade StupidRepublicEmblem-Traced-TORkit.svg Calrayn 04:24, 12 June 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: hehehehehehehehe. Hi there. Did ya miss me?

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Support

  1. D MCCG D MCCG.png (chat) 03:06, 18 June 2021 (UTC)

Object

Tomotron
Vergence
Braha'tok/Legends

Up to Rise of the Sith

  • "According to Mical, Revan returned to his first teacher in order to learn how to best leave the Jedi Order, though he did not follow through." You're trying to keep a trend of saying Revan is not named Revan yet, but this seems to be an anomaly.
    • Fixed.
  • "Outraged at the Jedi Council's refusal to involve the Order in the conflict, the young Jedi Knight began to move among the Order," What do you mean by "move among the order"?
    • Reworded.
  • Second and forth paragraphs of The Revanchist are too bloated. As is the forth paragraph of Fighting the Mandalorians and the final paragraph of Dark Lord of the Sith. Bisecting them accordingly is advised.
  • "Alec and his followers" is used multiple times, but that format makes it sound like they could be Alec's followers.
    • Reworded.
  • "Shortly after the Adasca affair, the Taris Siege, and the bombardment of Jebble," the last two events are just passingly mentioned with no context and don't seem relevant to the narrative at all. I'd say it's better to not mention them at all.
    • Done.
  • "Anointing his new servants as Darth Revan and Darth Malak, the Dark Lords of the Sith, the Emperor sent them back to the Republic as a vanguard to his own invasion, ordering them to make use of the Rakatan Star Forge and to report back when they had crushed the Republic's resistance." The reintroduction of the Star Forge makes it look like the Sith suddenly had it, and then we find out that Revan is locating it after he searched a lil bit. I'd try and say from the start that Revan and Malak needed to locate and obtain the Star Forge.
    • Changed to "find and make use of"
  • "the two were taken captive by the native Black Rakata." The Black Rakata's article introduces them as a tribe, but the Revan article introduces them as if they're a species. Please revise.
    • added "tribe"
  • "When the Republic officer Saul Karath defected to Revan's forces, Revan eventually promoted Karath to commander of the entire Sith fleet. However, Malak ordered the Admiral to bombard the surface of the planet Telos IV with his flagship Leviathan," Is Karath the admiral? If so you should probably specify their (new?) rank in the first sentence. Braha'tok enthusiast (Hello there) 10:24, 12 June 2021 (UTC)
    • Changed to "newly-promoted Admiral". Cade StupidRepublicEmblem-Traced-TORkit.svg Calrayn 16:17, 12 June 2021 (UTC)
  • You refer to the "Emperor" when Revan and Malak encounter the guy but I'm assuming that's Vitiate? If so, I think it would be better to keep using Vitiate's name rather than just the Emperor.
    • At this point in time, the Emperor was literally *only* known as the Emperor; he discarded his older names after leaving Nathema and didn't readopt others until the events of TOR.
  • You ok with these changes? Braha'tok enthusiast (Hello there) 23:03, 12 June 2021 (UTC)
  • "Revan quickly won a string of military victories, proving himself to a capable military leader," Proving himself to whom?
  • "While Revan was a military genius who knew that the Republic's industrial might was the key to victory, […] "Moral shortcuts" became common under Revan and Malak's leadership, and the two Jedi developed a cold and calculating disposition unlike that of a Jedi; they matched the Mandalorians' brutal tactics with tactics just as merciless." If this is someone's point of view, that should be specified, because this feels to me like it flouts WP:NPOV a bit.
  • You should specify that Foerost is a planet (or whatever the source says it is if the Foerost article is wrong). Braha'tok enthusiast (Hello there) 12:37, 14 June 2021 (UTC)
Macaroni

Comments

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