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This page is for Good article nominations. A Good article is an article that adheres to certain quality standards but cannot reach Featured status due to its limited content. In turn, a Good article features more detail than a Comprehensive article. On this page, users can nominate articles that they believe are ready to be reviewed to achieve Good status.

The article-nomination process is not a way to showcase your favorite articles, but rather articles that are of high quality. Articles placed on this page will be extensively reviewed by experienced editors, including the presiding AgriCorps review panel. The nomination process will require the article nominator to respond to objections and improve the article until the requisite number of users supports the nomination.

In undertaking a nomination on this page, the nominator is taking responsibility for their nominated article. This means they need to thoroughly read the following instructions, implement them into their nominated article, and respond to given objections. Nominators are encouraged to ask more experienced editors for guidance and assistance, but self-sufficiency is a requirement of the article-nomination process. It is not inherently the job of reviewers to rewrite elements of an article, but rather to guide nominators to be able to fix issues themselves.

Your nomination is your responsibility. Nominations that severely neglect the following rules or otherwise fall idle after ten days will be subject to immediate removal.

READ THIS FIRST!

A Good article must…

  1. …be well-written and comprehensively detailed.
  2. …be unbiased, with a neutral point of view.
  3. …have comprehensive Appearances and Sources lists.
  4. …be fully referenced, including all quotes and images. See Wookieepedia:Sourcing for more information.
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  10. …include a "Behind the scenes" section for in-universe articles.
  11. …include a reasonable number of images of the highest quality to illustrate the article, as source availability permits.
  12. …provide an introduction that gives a good summary of the topic, along with an article body that is at least 165 words long, not counting the "Behind the scenes" section (not including captions, quotes, headers, etc). Articles that fail to do so should be nominated for Comprehensive status. For clarification, please refer to this flowchart.
  13. …be at least 250 words long and must not exceed 1000 words. This word total counts the introduction, the article body, and "Behind the scenes" material, but not captions, quotes, headers, etc. For clarification, please refer to this flowchart.
  14. …not be deliberately shortened if it approaches the 1000-word limit.
  15. …be properly titled in accordance with Wookieepedia's treatment of Canon and Legends articles; i.e., no nomination may have "/Canon" in the title.

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  1. Select an article you feel is worthy of Good status. Nominated articles must meet all fifteen requirements stated above.
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  4. Copy the code provided to the bottom of this page.
  5. Purge the article to update the template.
  6. Other users will object to the nomination with issues and suggested improvements (errors, style, organization, images, notability, sources, etc).
  7. The nominator should then adjust the article until the objections are satisfied. The objector is responsible for striking their objection when it has been addressed, not the nominator. Additionally, reviewers will often copy-edit the article themselves as desired to fix any issues.
  8. Following their review, other users will vote to support the nomination. Users may not vote on their own nomination.
  9. Each user (except for members of the AgriCorps) shall be limited to four active Good article nominations at any given time. Any additional nominations will be subject to immediate removal.
  10. Users must successfully complete one Good article nomination before they can have two nominations active on the GAN page at one time. Likewise, users must complete two successful GA nominations before they can have three, and three successful GA nominations before they can have four.

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  2. The article should be reviewed with the criteria listed above, and any issues should be placed under the Object section of the article's nomination page. Objections should be clearly explained, and detail how the article can be improved.
  3. Objections should then be addressed by the nominator. Once the objector is satisfied, they should strike their objection. The nominator should not strike reviewers' objections for them.
  4. Once a reviewer is satisfied with the article, they can vote to support it. Please note that in order to support a nomination, you must have 50 mainspace edits.
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  6. Once the nomination is successful, the article will be considered a "Good article." As such, an AgriCorps member will archive the nomination, tag the article with the {{Eras|ga}} template, tag its talk page with the {{GA}} template, and place the article on the Good articles page. Only members of the AgriCorps are allowed to perform these archiving tasks.

All nominations will be considered idle and are subject to immediate removal by AgriCorps vote if objections are not addressed after a period of 10 days.

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Contents

Good article nominations

View recent changes for this page and its subpages

Mixer

(3 ACs/5 Users/8 Total)

(Votes required: No additional votes required to pass, please consider reviewing another article.)

Support

Good job on your first GAN. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 07:07, April 10, 2020 (UTC)
  1. Ben sc01t (talk) 06:41, April 12, 2020 (UTC)
  2. --CommanderDeviss327(talk) 21:03, April 14, 2020 (UTC)
  3. OtterSurf (talk) 10:26, May 17, 2020 (UTC)
  4. --Vitus InfinitusTalk 17:05, May 17, 2020 (UTC)
  5. ComicalNinja [Talk] 18:48, May 19, 2020 (UTC)
  6. ACvote.png Be careful of overusing commas. Keep up the work, though! MasterCommerce Guild.svgFredcerique 21:57, June 23, 2020 (UTC)
  7. ACvote.png Ayrehead02 (talk) 08:07, August 12, 2020 (UTC)
  8. ACvote.png Imperators II(Talk) 06:54, September 17, 2020 (UTC)

Object

Spooky
  • Several redirecting links, which should be fixed.
  • The intro doesn't need to be referenced, because the article has a body.
  • 21 BBY cannot be directly determined from the episode only, and would need an additional reference note.
  • Per the Layout Guide, the initial air date of the episode needs to be added and referenced. The entire BtS cannot be sourced to "ARC Troopers", either, since the first part of about "Voyage of Temptation".
  • Please resolve the missing backup links.
  • Personality and traits is unsourced.
  • There's also some overall underlinking in the biography, if you comb through it and solve that.spookywillowwtalk 17:10, April 5, 2020 (UTC)
    • Updated. --TK-462 (talk)
      • There is no release date for the episode, still.spookywillowwtalk 03:57, April 7, 2020 (UTC)
        • Whoops! It's good to go now. --TK-462 (talk)
          • The OOU air date needs a separate reference other than just the "Voyage of Temptation" page- it can't be sourced to the episode alone. What I mean is to pull the air date from a source like the episode guide or tv.com.spookywillowwtalk 01:34, April 8, 2020 (UTC)
            • I answered my previous question, I got that cleaned up and the air date is now referenced correctly --TK-462 (talk)
  • You're in Category:Infoboxes with missing parameters.
  • Human, as the species, is infobox-exclusive.spookywillowwtalk 03:57, April 7, 2020 (UTC)
    • Fixed the above. --TK-462 (talk)
      • 'Human' is still intro exclusive. Should be mentioned in either the biography or P&T, as well.spookywillowwtalk 01:34, April 8, 2020 (UTC)
  • In the P&T, I'm fairly sure him being 1.83 meters tall, or the colors for his hair, skin, and eye color can't be sourced to the episode alone. Likely, need to be pulled from elsewhere (probably, the databank entry used for those same things in the infobox)spookywillowwtalk 01:34, April 8, 2020 (UTC)
    • I can't believe I've missed it for that long! Thanks for the catch. --TK-462 (talk)
Shayanomer
  • Phase I clone trooper armor can be added to Equipment.
  • Since there are only two paragraphs in the biography, the sections are unnecessary.
  • 501st Legion is currently exclusive to the infobox. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 17:13, April 5, 2020 (UTC)
    • Done. --TK-462 (talk)
      • Mentioning the 501st and Redeye in the Personality and traits is unnecessary, 501st can be moved to the biography. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 17:43, April 6, 2020 (UTC)
  • You'll need make a number of corrections to the date reference. First, Galactic Atlas does not mention the event that involves Mixer's death, so you will need to remove that from the first sentence. Second, you need to use the chronological episode order to confirm that Voyage of Temptation is set between the Ryloth battle and the conspiracy. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 17:41, April 6, 2020 (UTC)
    • Updated, both references have been added. I'm a bit iffy as to how they should be worded, but I believe the content is clear. --TK-462 (talk)
      • Good, now you need to combine them into one reference. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 18:13, April 6, 2020 (UTC)
        • There we go! Hopefully that sets it up to par. --TK-462 (talk)
          • I've made a few tweaks. but good job overall. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 18:27, April 6, 2020 (UTC)
  • I would suggest reworking the paragraph structure. You have a big paragraph right after a paragraph with two sentences. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 18:27, April 6, 2020 (UTC)
    • Is there any reason I shouldn't just combine them into one paragraph? I guess that first paragraph could just be removed, but I feel that it adds a bit of clarity so the reader doesn't have to comb through the references quite as much. --TK-462 (talk)
      • I counted 8 sentences in the Biography. Perhaps you should split them into 4 sentences each, it would help with readability. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 18:42, April 6, 2020 (UTC)
        • Not much of a change on my part, but does that work? --TK-462 (talk)
  • Grand Army is intro-exclusive.
  • You can't say Mixer was assigned to the 501st between 21 and 20 BBY. He could've been assigned before that point in time.
  • Height, hair, eye and skin color are infobox-exclusive.
  • Redeye being assigned to the same team should be mentioned in the first paragraph.
  • His dialogue towards Redeye could be detailed in the biography as well.
  • You should explain why Redeye disappeared and how Mixer was unaware of his death initially.
  • Him trying to contact Redeye is another quote that can be added to the article. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 19:04, April 6, 2020 (UTC)
    • What if I added the quote at the beginning of the page to Personality and traits, and switch it with the one where Mixer is trying to contact Redeye? --TK-462 (talk)
    • All of the above edits have been done. --TK-462 (talk)
      • Physical traits need to go under "Personality and traits". Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 19:44, April 6, 2020 (UTC)
        • Whoops! That's my bad. --TK-462 (talk)
          • Great. You may have noticed that I added links where possible. Underlinking is a valid objection, so you'll need to keep that in mind for future nominations. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 19:52, April 6, 2020 (UTC)
            • I did, thanks for checking my work. I just double checked the links in the bio and was able to knock out a couple that had been linked twice, that should be all there is. --TK-462 (talk)
  • R2-D2 will need more context. Who does he belong to? Why was he there in the first place? Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 04:07, April 7, 2020 (UTC)
    • It took rewatching the episode, but I've reworked the bio so the order of events is actually correct now, and I was able to add another quote to give some more depth to the page. I think that should clear that objection up?--TK-462 (talk)
      • It would still be better to list Skywalker as the droid's owner, as he was also on the ship. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 05:24, April 8, 2020 (UTC)
        • Gotcha. Assuming I don't have to list off a bunch of Skywalker's titles, it should be good to go. --TK-462 (talk)
  • Going through the article again, you can definitely expand on what happened after Mixer's death, specifically Skywalker, Rex and Cody's investigation.
  • In relation to the above objection, you should list who led the escort team. This would make the mention of Skywalker's droid later in the paragraph fit more into place. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 17:01, April 8, 2020 (UTC)
    • I added a new paragraph detailing the escort's response, I think it ties things together better. I also added the escort team's leaders in the first paragraph to add continuity throughout the page. --TK-462 (talk)
  • "Redeye was then spooked by R2-D2, but found nothing of note." I would remove this since it doesn't involve Mixer at all.
  • You mention in the last part of the second paragraph that the droids were smuggled by Merrik, but this should be made clear with the first mention of the assassin droid.
  • The quote at the top of the page needs to be combined into one sentence, since only Mixer is speaking. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 18:53, April 8, 2020 (UTC)
  • "As he continued his search, an SD-K4 assassin droid attacked and killed Redeye." You should also make it clear that Mixer was completely unaware of what happened to Redeye. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 18:55, April 8, 2020 (UTC)
    • All three above have been updated, thanks for catching those. --TK-462 (talk)
  • Hopefully this is my last objection: "Mixer attempted to contact his comrade, but to no avail. The trooper then moved to Redeye's last known location, where he found his DC-15A blaster carbine, but Redeye was nowhere to be found." I would suggest rewording this to improve the flow of the sentences. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 19:29, April 8, 2020 (UTC)
    • I think that should work a little bit better. --TK-462 (talk)
  • There is enough space for an image now. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 19:45, April 8, 2020 (UTC)
    • Added. --TK-462 (talk)
      • Don't you think it should be an image of Mixer surveying the area, or being attacked by the droid? Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 03:42, April 9, 2020 (UTC)
        • I'm having some trouble finding one in an official source, the one I uploaded was the best I could find from the episode guide. --TK-462 (talk)
          • JMAS can get one in HD for you, just leave him a message. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 18:27, April 9, 2020 (UTC)
  • Gonna have to rescind my vote, sorry (there are already too many non-AC votes). The revised date note still needs more work. Scum and Villainy does not use the BBY/ABY system, so you need to explain how you convert that book's dating system (C.R.C.) to the one used by Galactic Atlas. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 15:28, June 10, 2020 (UTC)
    • Actually, Scum and Villainy's dating system is in question, so just go back to the original date note. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 16:39, June 10, 2020 (UTC)
  • Per precedent, date and location of death can be put into the same reference. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 17:22, 9 December 2020 (UTC)
Zed
  • Similar to my objection for Kosmos, the Databank reference needs to include a manual reference note to explain how it relates to Mixer. Zed42 (talk) 01:06, April 15, 2020 (UTC)
    • Fixed. --TK-462 (talk) 01:38, April 15, 2020 (UTC)
Anil
  • Regarding the TCW date note, that StarWars.com chronology does not mention the Battle of Ryloth or the Mandalorian black market conspiracy at all, it only dates the TCW episodes that feature those events. So you should clarify this in the reference note like this one, for example.
    • Fixed. Since I don't have the GA, I found two major events that were as close as possible to the episode chronologically to reference. TK-462 (talk) 22:03, May 7, 2020 (UTC)
  • Based on the infobox image alone, I think you can say that the trooper's armor featured built-in comlink in the Equipment section.
  • Unless there is a source that explicitly says Mixer showed this behaviour, I think the bit about withstanding any combat stress is not relevant to this article. There are many traits shared by all clone troopers (growth acceleration, behavioral modification biochips, etc.), and those specifications belong in the clone trooper article. Just mentioning the clone's fundamental traits (eye color, gender, homeworld, etc.) should suffice for this article.
    • Makes sense, it's been removed. TK-462 (talk) 22:03, May 7, 2020 (UTC)
  • (Reviewing note) Per our Manual of Style, articles shall use the serial comma as standard. You can read more about it here if you like. I've fixed it for you, but please keep this in mind for your future nominations. TanDivoInsignia-SenateMurders.svg Anıl Şerifoğlu (talk) 22:12, May 6, 2020 (UTC)
  • In the Biography section, Kamino being located in the Outer Rim cannot be sourced to that reference note. You should either add another reference for that, or expand the current note accordingly.
    • Fixed. TK-462 (talk) 01:12, May 30, 2020 (UTC)
      • Actually, this new source you've added, the Databank entry for Kamino, states that the planet was located "beyond the Outer Rim," which suggests that the information you've got there is incorrect. TanDivoInsignia-SenateMurders.svg Anıl Şerifoğlu (talk) 02:21, May 30, 2020 (UTC)
        • Ah, thanks for catching that. After reviewing a couple similar GAs, I just removed any mention of the Outer Rim altogether, as there wasn't really a concrete location other than it's direction in relation to the OR. TK-462 (talk) 16:39, May 30, 2020 (UTC)
  • (Reviewing note) There is no need to add links to disambiguation pages in the in-universe sections of an article. TanDivoInsignia-SenateMurders.svg Anıl Şerifoğlu (talk) 22:32, May 29, 2020 (UTC)
Tommy
  • The P&T image is colliding with the Equipment header. I suggest resizing, relocating, or removing it.
  • I think the first quote's audio can be cropped better so it's only the quote itself, not a couple of seconds of random thumps.
    • I don't know that I'm able to fix it due to my computer, but I'll see what I can do.
      • Audacity is probably the best option, but if you're on Mac like me, I find an application called MixPad Multitrack Recorder to work just as well.
        • Good to know, thank you. I'll see what I can do. TK-462 (talk) 03:05, May 15, 2020 (UTC)
          • Have you managed to handle this objection yet? Tommy-Macaroni 17:19, May 17, 2020 (UTC)
            • It is fixed. For future reference, I used TwistedWave, which is available without download and worked pretty well for my purposes. TK-462 (talk) 19:52, May 19, 2020 (UTC)
  • Would it be possible to get a better source for the episode's release date? The current one is okay, but the link itself is obviously obsolete. A live link is preferable.
    • I can't actually see the release date on that link.
      • I've been looking around, and the only other source that has been used in GAs is the Legends sourcebook from 2013. I've changed it back to the original reference as I can't find a more suitable one. TK-462 (talk) 03:05, May 15, 2020 (UTC)
  • Context for the Coronet in the intro.
  • "Mixer was a human clone of the bounty hunter Jango Fett who hailed from the planet Kamino." - It's unclear if the Kamino bit is referring to Mixer or Jango.
  • Context for the Clone Wars in History.
  • Do written sources capitalise "Duchess" when it's written without an accompanying name?
    • I didn't have much to go off of, but I don't think that there would have been any reason to based off what I saw. Same rules apply as military ranks it appears. TK-462 (talk) 23:30, May 13, 2020 (UTC)
      • Indeed.
  • "Mixer attempted to contact his comrade, but to no avail. Mixer proceeded" - Two consecutive sentences starting the same is discouraged, please vary this wording.
  • "Still, Redeye was nowhere to be found" - This is kinda informal, and also unnecessary imo. If Redeye's body was with his gun, it would have been mentioned already.
  • "but was also ambushed by one of the assassin droids smuggled on board by the traitorous Senator Tal Merrik" - Could this context for the assassin droids not be put when you introduce the subject with Redeye's death?
  • I feel like the term "clone trooper" is used kinda late in the body. I think this should be mentioned a lot earlier, if not the first sentence of the history.
    • "Mixer was a human clone trooper of the bounty hunter Jango Fett" - This now reads like Mixer was under the direct ownership of Jango.
  • Maybe it's just me, but I don't think joking about the dark is really a "dark sense of humor" (aside from the pun I've just noticed). Like, the dark isn't a particularly controversial or taboo topic. I think you ought to just say "a sense of humor."
    • ...fixed :( TK-462 (talk) 23:30, May 13, 2020 (UTC)
  • I'm assuming it's a wrist comlink? If it is, you can be most specific instead of just saying "affixed to his armor."
  • "His arm plates and helmet bore unique blue stripes marking him as a member of the 501st Legion." - I think you can be a little more descriptive about the armour markings, considering that's really all that makes this guy visually unique.
    • "blue stripes crescent markings" - This is grammatically incorrect.
    • I'd also say it isn't "unique," as that clone on Kamino also had these markings per the BTS. Tommy-Macaroni 09:27, May 14, 2020 (UTC)
      • Oh, good point. I've fixed it now. TK-462 (talk) 03:05, May 15, 2020 (UTC)
  • "Like all clone troopers in the series, he was voiced by Dee Bradley Baker." - I don't think the former statement can be sourced to this one episode. I think wording it like "As a clone trooper, Mixer was voiced by Dee Bradley Baker" or something could work. Tommy-Macaroni 12:57, May 13, 2020 (UTC)
    • Fixed the above objections, except a couple I noted. TK-462 (talk) 23:30, May 13, 2020 (UTC)
  • You should never link to disambiguation pages in an article body. It is correct to use [[Duke|duchess]] as I did. Also, please make sure to link to subjects upon their first mention.
  • Links should be specific on their first mention, then get more general. Eg, Nau'ur-class yacht, then yacht. Duchess of Mandalore, then Duchess. Pipelinks are fine for this too, eg, Nau'ur-class yacht can be pipelinked to just yacht, and indeed it should be in the intro. Please fix this.
  • Please make sure you pay attention to what I did in my copy-edit, so the mistakes I fixed aren't made again. Upon their second mention, clone troopers should be formatted as [[Cloning|clone]] [[trooper]]s.
  • When pipelinking, the link is always capitalised. For example, never do [[cloning|clone]]. Tommy-Macaroni 09:27, May 14, 2020 (UTC)
    • Fixed the above four objections, and thanks for the help on some of the linking stuff. TK-462 (talk) 03:05, May 15, 2020 (UTC)
  • I think for an article of this length the intro can be expanded. You can add more detail from the History, and even parts of P&T and Equipment.
  • Per precedent on clone articles, you should format the name as "Mixer" in the infobox, the first mention in the intro, and the first mention in the body. Subsequent mentions in the intro and body should just be as Mixer. See 1 2 3 examples.
    • Check again. Tommy-Macaroni 11:45, June 5, 2020 (UTC)
      • Gotcha, missed the infobox. Fixed. TK-462 (talk) 19:23, June 7, 2020 (UTC)
  • In both the intro and body, you need to introduce "Mixer" as a nickname. Tommy-Macaroni 18:32, May 26, 2020 (UTC)
    • Fixed the above three objections. I may have erred on the side of excess information in the intro, but if you feel it's too much I can trim some. TK-462 (talk) 20:25, May 26, 2020 (UTC)
  • For the biography, while I appreciate your efforts to create a subsection, you shouldn't have some information under a subsection and some the regular section. In this case, all information in the biography should exist under a subsection. I think we could have the first two paragraphs (up to "began their sweep, accompanied by Skywalker's astromech droid, R2-D2.[3]") under something like "Early service" and the latter two under something like "Death," although other titles could certainly work. Tommy-Macaroni 20:34, June 9, 2020 (UTC)
    • I divided it again, hopefully the flow has improved. TK-462 (talk) 01:02, June 10, 2020 (UTC)
Vitus
  • It should be noted that Mixer's customized look was also utilized by a contingent of clone troopers during the Battle of Kamino in ARC Troopers, when Obi-Wan and Anakin are together fighting in the city.--Vitus InfinitusTalk 18:01, May 13, 2020 (UTC)
    • That's noted in the BTC, but I didn't add it to the main article as it didn't seem relavant to the article. TK-462 (talk) 21:23, May 13, 2020 (UTC)
      • Okay, additionally I'm thinking you should make note in the BTS that there were several clones who used his armor design, since the way it's worded it can't be known whether it appeared on one person or several.--Vitus InfinitusTalk 16:45, May 14, 2020 (UTC)
        • Ah, good point. Fixed. TK-462 (talk) 02:15, May 15, 2020 (UTC)
ComicalNinja
Toprawa
  • For starters, I'd say the Biography has enough content to be organized into four paragraphs, which will in turn allow for a neat division of two subsections of each. This will also allow for an additional quote, if available. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 04:41, May 29, 2020 (UTC)
    • There's not really any applicable quotes, but I readjusted the current ones to be a little more applicable to their locations. I did make the bio into four paragraphs, but it didn't make sense to me to have it split right in half, given that Mixer's appearance consisted of one scene that didn't require any sectioning. TK-462 (talk) 01:11, May 30, 2020 (UTC)
      • I would suggest joining our IRC or Discord channels so that we can expedite conversation with regard to this nomination. It looks like there's quite a bit of basic information for article nomination and formatting that needs to be explained you, which isn't practically done through nomination pages like this. Real-time conversation is much easier and preferable for this. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 01:17, May 30, 2020 (UTC)
        • Will do. I don't have access to Discord currently, but I'm trying to be as active as possible on the IRC despite work and college classes. TK-462 (talk) 16:19, May 30, 2020 (UTC)
          • Objection(s) overridden by AgriCorps 13:49, June 10, 2020 (UTC)
  • The article sources some details to "Voyage of Temptation" that I would like confirm can actually be supported by that episode and don't need a separate source:
    • Does the episode say that Anakin and Obi-Wan are Jedi Generals?
      • Yes. TK-462 (talk) 06:40, September 17, 2020 (UTC)
    • The Coronet being a Nau'ur-class yacht. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 19:05, September 16, 2020 (UTC)
      • Fixed the referencing. TK-462 (talk) 06:40, September 17, 2020 (UTC)
    • The article only details that the yacht is New Mandalorian in the intro. This will need to be added to the Bio, but can it also be supported by the episode?
      • Thanks for catching this. I couldn't find anything stating that the Coronet belonged specifically to the New Mandalorians, so I removed the mention for clarity. TK-462 (talk) 06:40, September 17, 2020 (UTC)
        • I'm not sure I understand. The New Mandalorian mention remains in the Bio, sourced to a different TCW episode. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 19:21, September 22, 2020 (UTC)
          • Fixed. TK-462 (talk) 17:51, September 24, 2020 (UTC)
  • The first Bio paragraph would do well to explain that the escort team is guarding against an assassination attempt by the Death Watch. The intro explains this well, but the Bio doesn't slip this in until the second paragraph. It would help to explain upfront that this is the specific reason why Mixer and his team are there. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 19:12, September 16, 2020 (UTC)
    • Fixed. TK-462 (talk) 06:40, September 17, 2020 (UTC)
  • The intro refers to the Coronet as "her" (Satine's) yacht, which is not reflected in the Biography. Is this detail correct? Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 22:20, September 24, 2020 (UTC)
    • Thanks, I missed that (clearly). Starships and Speeders conveniently references it being Satine's. TK-462 (talk) 03:32, September 25, 2020 (UTC)
      • This referencing appears to be problematic: "aboard her Nau'ur-class yacht" is sourced to Starships and Speeders, but the term "aboard" specifically applies to Mixer's mission and cannot be sourced to that book, which does not mention him. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 03:37, September 25, 2020 (UTC)
        • I've referenced it to VoT once again, thank you. TK-462 (talk) 03:48, September 25, 2020 (UTC)
  • "'Mixer' was the nickname of a clone trooper" cannot be sourced to the Databank. It's alarming how many statements in this article are not referenced correctly. I would strongly recommend going back and combing through this article word by word to make sure everything is referenced accurately. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 23:11, September 25, 2020 (UTC)
    • I've combed through and done my best to reference the article correctly, it should be fixed now. TK-462 (talk) 01:34, September 28, 2020 (UTC)
  • Kamino being an "extragalactic planet" is extraneous detail to this character and is unnecessary to mention. Worse, it introduces an extra ref note, which serves nothing but to make the reading experience less smooth. Just remove that. Kamino being a planet can be sourced to that DB entry.
  • None of this can really be sourced to "Voyage of Temptation," which doesn't explicitly depict the Grand Army or show Mixer fighting against the CIS. The article would do better to word this as saying he was created on Kamino to serve the Grand Army in its fight against the CIS during the Clone Wars. "...Grand Army during the Clone Wars against the Confederacy of Independent Systems." Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 20:35, September 28, 2020 (UTC)
    • Fixed the above objections. TK-462 (talk) 23:08, September 28, 2020 (UTC)
  • "Mixer was part of a Republic escort team led by Jedi Generals Obi-Wan Kenobi and Anakin Skywalker that was tasked with guarding Duchess Satine Kryze of the planet Mandalore aboard her Nau'ur-class yacht, the Coronet." There are some crucial details missing here. Why has Mixer and the escort team been sent to protect her? Where is the ship going? Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 01:32, September 29, 2020 (UTC)
    • Fixed. TK-462 (talk) 02:54, September 29, 2020 (UTC)
  • Where does the episode say that she's traveling "to refute claims of her affiliation with the Death Watch." It says she's going to plead her case for neutrality in the war.
    • Per Imperator's note on another nomination, I'll just note that this objection has been addressed. TK-462 (talk) 05:27, 7 December 2020 (UTC)
  • And where specifically does the episode say she's traveling to Coruscant? The beginning of the episode merely says she's traveling to plead her case before the Senate. We know, of course, that this is on Coruscant, but if the episode doesn't say this, then your referencing doesn't work. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 00:32, October 16, 2020 (UTC)
    • I've updated the referencing and wording to reflect this. TK-462 (talk) 15:28, October 16, 2020 (UTC)
      • Two things here. Firstly, I think it would be better for the article to just say "to plead for her people's neutrality before the Galactic Senate." Because she notes in the episode that she represents whatever number of countless star systems, not just Mandalore: "...to plead Mandalore's neutrality before the Galactic Senate"; and secondly, just remove the end of that sentence about Coruscant as unnecessary detail. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 20:24, October 16, 2020 (UTC)
        • Makes sense, fixed. TK-462 (talk) 20:38, 25 October 2020 (UTC)
Ayrehead
  • The fact that Merrik is plotting to kill Satine is intro exclusive. Ayrehead02 (talk) 11:17, June 26, 2020 (UTC)
  • You need to mention Mandalore is a planet. Ayrehead02 (talk) 11:17, June 26, 2020 (UTC)
  • I think certainly the first, and maybe the second, body images could be cropped to cut out a lot of the empty dark space. Ayrehead02 (talk) 11:17, June 26, 2020 (UTC)
  • Is there not a quote for the first body section? It could be a general quote about having clones sweep the ship or something. Ayrehead02 (talk) 11:17, June 26, 2020 (UTC)
    • Fixed the above. TK-462 (talk) 20:34, July 1, 2020 (UTC)
  • The new quote reminded me that you should mention Death Watch in the article since they're the ones the clones are patrolling to search for, plus Merrik is a member. Ayrehead02 (talk) 10:13, July 2, 2020 (UTC)
    • Ah, good point. Added to intro and body. TK-462 (talk) 03:37, July 7, 2020 (UTC)
  • Per recent discussions, we shouldn't include clone troopers' eye or skin colour unless it's shown. Ayrehead02 (talk) 10:13, July 2, 2020 (UTC)
    • Ignore this for now as it's still under debate. Ayrehead02 (talk) 21:42, July 2, 2020 (UTC)
Ecks Dee
  • For the lead quote, are you sure it's accurately transcribed? My copy of TCW has it as "All right, men. What's the problem? I'm missing dinner." "We're not sure yet, sir. But there's still no sign of Mixer and Redeye." This also raises suspicion that the other quotes in the article need to be re-checked for accuracy.
    • This isn't completely fixed. The lead quote, yes, but the rest of the quotes need to be re-checked. I just checked the episode again and all three remaining quotes are wrong in one way or another. 1358 (Talk) 14:36, July 14, 2020 (UTC)
      • I don't have access to the episode directly at the moment, and I couldn't find any sources for an episode transcript other than the one I'd previously used, which is clearly incorrect. Do you or anyone reading this have a better source online for this? TK-462 (talk) 02:06, July 20, 2020 (UTC)
        • Will you have access to the episode directly anytime soon? Being able to access the source material is a prerequisite for nominations. If this was a matter of a minor punctuation error, this wouldn't be a big deal, but there are major errors that don't even require the script or subtitles to discover—namely, the first bio quote. 1358 (Talk) 09:47, July 20, 2020 (UTC)
          • Got it. I don't have Disney+ at the moment (that's changed since the beginning of this nomination... it's been a while), but I'll try and access source material within the day. TK-462 (talk) 13:47, July 20, 2020 (UTC)
            • Sorry for the wait, this is fixed. TK-462 (talk) 20:18, July 25, 2020 (UTC)
              • You need to re-check the quote in "Ambush aboard the Coronet" for wording and the PT quote for punctuation. 1358 (Talk) 08:22, August 12, 2020 (UTC)
                • PT quote is fixed, but I looked at the subtitles on Disney+ and didn't see any issue for the ambush section. TK-462 (talk) 03:37, August 13, 2020 (UTC)
                  • In my copy, it's "What do you got, Redeye?" and indeed it sounds like he says "do" rather than "have" when you slow it down. Does Disney+ think it's "have"? 1358 (Talk) 12:46, August 24, 2020 (UTC)
                    • Disney+ subtitles do use have. I'm inclined to keep it that way because it's using better grammar, but I'm not sure which source takes precedence here. 03:21, August 26, 2020 (UTC)
                      • I'm going to put the subtitles thing to rest hopefully. I have reset all the quotes back to how they appear in the subtitles on the blu ray, which is where I took the audio files from. Disney+ only gives the option for Closed Caption English subtitles for the hearing impaired, which are often less accurate. I think when there are slight differences in punctuation for a quote, we should default to the blu ray over Disney+. Case in point, the blu ray has the bio quote as "What do you got, Redeye?" which clearly matches the audio. The Disney+ closed caption ones use, "What have you got, Redeye?" - JMAS Jolly Trooper.png Hey, it's me! 04:41, September 13, 2020 (UTC)
                        • Thanks, JMAS; agreed that blu-ray is preferred. Sorry for the delay with the objection. 1358 (Talk) 10:06, September 13, 2020 (UTC)
  • The second intro sentence is really a long run-on and needs to be split for better flow.
    • Fixed the above objections. TK-462 (talk) 14:21, July 10, 2020 (UTC)
  • I feel like you could cut down on the context a bit in the second intro paragraph. Mixer is barely mentioned.
    • Although Mixer isn't directly mentioned terribly often, I don't feel that much can be subtracted without missing important points. However, The final sentence seems like it wouldn't be bad to remove, I'd just rather have a second opinion. TK-462 (talk) 14:21, July 10, 2020 (UTC)
      • For instance, there is no need to mention that Rex was the one who attempted to contact them after their deaths. You also mention the plot on Kryze's life a whopping three times in the intro.
        • Ah, my bad. My mistake, I was looking at the second bio paragraph. How does that look? TK-462 (talk) 02:06, July 20, 2020 (UTC)
  • More to come once these are addressed. 1358 (Talk) 21:23, July 9, 2020 (UTC)
There's no south in space
  • Why are you referring to the Nau'ur-class yacht as a "spaceliner" in the intro? Those two are not the same thing, and it's not supported by the article's body. Imperators II(Talk) 06:01, September 16, 2020 (UTC)
    • According to the references on the Coronet page, the Star Wars Encyclopedia of Starfighters and Other Vehicles classifies the as a "luxury spaceliner." However, the Nau'ur-class yacht page classifies it as a yacht and uses an FFG reference. I assume the Encyclopedia would take precedence here assuming there's an inconsistency, right? TK-462 (talk) 17:57, September 16, 2020 (UTC)
      • For future reference, you should be checking the information in the articles you nominate against the sources yourself or via another user who has the source, not against a Wookieepedia article. Please do so. Imperators II(Talk) 18:10, September 16, 2020 (UTC)
        • Alright. The Encyclopedia specifically classifies the Coronet as a luxury spaceliner, so I believe that using spaceliner as a descriptor is accurate. TK-462 (talk) 18:41, September 16, 2020 (UTC)
          • Do it, then. Standardize it. Imperators II(Talk) 18:47, September 16, 2020 (UTC)
            • After looking into this a bit more, I believe that yacht is a more accurate and widely used term for Coronet, so I fixed it that way. TK-462 (talk) 06:48, September 17, 2020 (UTC)
  • Does Dee Bradley Baker voice all the clone troopers in the series? If so, you should reword the "as a clone trooper" bit in the BTS to something like "like all clone troopers" with appropriate referencing. Imperators II(Talk) 06:01, September 16, 2020 (UTC)
    • Fixed. TK-462 (talk) 17:57, September 16, 2020 (UTC)

Comments

Shayanomer
  • If you haven't already, enable "Highlight all redirects orange" in Preferences (under the Gadgets tab).
  • I'm gonna figure out how to reference 21 BBY. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 17:13, April 5, 2020 (UTC)
    • Great, thank you for the tip! --TK-462 (talk)
      • Ok so for 21 BBY, you will have to replace the timeframe with "between 21 BBY and 20 BBY." The chronological episode order places Voyage of Temptation after the end of the Battle of Ryloth and before the Mandalorian black market conspiracy. Star Wars: Galactic Atlas places the former in 21 BBY, and the latter event in 20 BBY. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 05:40, April 6, 2020 (UTC)
        • Okay, I'll change that on both of the places where it's referenced. I can still reference those dates to the episode, yes? -- TK-462 (talk)
          • Nope, you will need to write up a reference explaining why episode takes place in that timeframe using the sources I listed above. There are plenty of existing Good articles you can use to understand how date references are written. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 14:30, April 6, 2020 (UTC)
            • Will do, we'll see what I can find.
              • Another thing, make sure to leave a message below the objections once you've finished addressing them, otherwise the nomination will be taken down if they're left unaddressed for 10 days. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 15:03, April 6, 2020 (UTC)
                • Awesome, thanks for helping me through this. I'll note yours once I've finished the referencing. --TK-462 (talk)
  • I would strongly suggest familiarizing yourself with the rules for nominations. You cannot strike other users' objections. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 17:51, April 6, 2020 (UTC)
    • I read that right after I did it... sorry about that. --TK-462 (talk)
  • Just a heads up, I've replaced the reference for the air date with the old episode guide, since the new ones do not have the air date in them. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 18:53, April 8, 2020 (UTC)
  • Can you add an {{Imagecat}}? I didn't notice this until now. I can show you how to do it if you're new to this. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 16:10, April 20, 2020 (UTC)
    • I've never done it before, from what I can tell I have to add individual images to the category the template is referencing. I would love some help, if you wouldn't mind. TK-462 (talk) 17:10, April 20, 2020 (UTC)
      • Done. It's basically {{Imagecat|Images of [Subject name]}}. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 17:26, April 20, 2020 (UTC)
        • Oh! That easy. Thanks for the help as always :) TK-462 (talk) 17:28, April 20, 2020 (UTC)
Deviss
  • Although not an objection, I think sound files for the quotes could greatly improve the quality of the article. Other than that, I see no problems. --CommanderDeviss327(talk) 21:01, April 14, 2020 (UTC)
    • I'll work on figuring this out in the future, thanks for the heads up! TK-462 (talk) 17:22, April 20, 2020 (UTC)
      • There is nothing wrong with the sound quality of the audio files. - JMAS Jolly Trooper.png Hey, it's me! 04:36, September 13, 2020 (UTC)
Lewisr
  • It looks like you can definitively place his death in 21 BBY, Star Wars: Scum and Villainy: Case Files on the Galaxy's Most Notorious dates Boba's Sabotage of the Endurance to 7956 C.R.C (21 BBY). Also the Atlas dates the second battle of Geonosis to 21 BBY if you'd rather use that than the Zillo beast episodes as it narrows the gap between the episodes, though that's up to you! --Lewisr (talk) 02:19, June 10, 2020 (UTC)
    • Awesome, thanks for letting me know! I've updated the reference note to make the window of time where Mixer was involved as specific as possible, thanks again for the heads up. TK-462 (talk) 04:08, June 10, 2020 (UTC)
      • No worries! Nice job --Lewisr (talk) 13:51, June 10, 2020 (UTC)
        • Apologies for messing you about with this, but since we've just discovered that we can't definitively say that the numbers in Scum and Villainy refer to years, we'll have to change his death date back to what it was. Sorry once again! --Lewisr (talk) 16:40, June 10, 2020 (UTC)
          • No worries, it happens. Let me know if it needs to be changed again for any reason regarding that book or otherwise. TK-462 (talk) 18:16, June 10, 2020 (UTC)


Crys

  • Nominated by: TK-462 (talk) 17:26, April 15, 2020 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments:

(1 ACs/3 Users/4 Total)

(Votes required: 2 AC vote(s) required to reach minimum. No additional votes required to pass, please consider reviewing another article.)

Support

  1. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 17:23, May 4, 2020 (UTC)
  2. QuiGonJinn Senate seal.svg(Talk) 12:17, May 26, 2020 (UTC)
  3. Great work--Vitus InfinitusTalk 20:23, October 16, 2020 (UTC)
  4. ACvote.png Imperators II(Talk) 18:15, 24 December 2020 (UTC)

Object

Shayanomer
  • Since the clone is shown to be blonde, "black hair" and the fact that he "dyed" his hair should be removed from here, since the latter seems a little speculatory.
  • "After completing the robolobotomy, Crys gave a brief report to Kenobi. Crys worked closely with Commander Cody and General Kenobi, with Kenobi passing orders to his forces through Crys." I would remove this from the Skills, since it doesn't really talk about them.
  • 212th is missing from the body.
    • Fixed the above. --TK-462 (talk) 12:47, April 16, 2020 (UTC)
  • You have a number of reference issues:
  • You've sourced Grievous' escape to the Databank, which doesn't have this info.
  • You've also sourced the battle directly to Galactic Atlas. Like your Mixer nomination, a date note is required here.
    • The Battle of Saleucami page states that the battle occurred in 21 BBY, is this inaccurate, or did I just need to add some context to the reference? --TK-462 (talk) 12:47, April 16, 2020 (UTC)
      • The book doesn't directly date the battle, so you will need to create a note stating why it takes place in that year. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 12:51, April 16, 2020 (UTC)
  • In the BTS, you only need to source the air date to the episode guide, the rest of the info can be sourced to the episode. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 07:00, April 16, 2020 (UTC)
    • Fixed the above, excepting the previous question. --TK-462 (talk) 12:51, April 16, 2020 (UTC)
      • The Grievous reference is still outstanding. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 20:20, April 16, 2020 (UTC)
        • I believe that should have it fixed. I'm a bit iffy regarding that specific case, but I think the references are in a more comprehensible order now. --TK-462 (talk) 06:45, April 17, 2020 (UTC)
          • For future reference, you only need to source words like "Outer Rim" and "planet" to the databank, the planet's name can be covered by the episode itself. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 08:37, April 17, 2020 (UTC)
          • Thanks, I appreciate the help. --TK-462 (talk) 14:51, April 17, 2020 (UTC)
  • Missing voice actor.
  • Date issue: Body says "21 BBY," yet date note says the event took place between 21 and 20 BBY.
  • "Crys accompanied Jedi General Obi-Wan Kenobi, Clone Commander CC-2224 "Cody," Clone Captain CT-7567 "Rex" and many other Republic troops and vehicles." Where did Crys accompany them to?
  • AT-TE will need a little context, like "AT-TE walkers." Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 18:48, April 22, 2020 (UTC)
  • Ref issue in the Biography: 212th and Grand Army are sourced to the clone trooper reference.
  • "Grievous' landing craft was damaged, and crashed on the planet, although several escape pods managed to launch." The flow of this sentence can be improved.
  • "...before deducing that the droids were too damaged for any good intelligence." Were they trying to acquire said intelligence? It should be made clear here.
  • Small inconsistency between the second and third paragraphs: You say the droid was brought into a tank, then say the group was inside a walker.
  • Personality and traits can be restructured to improve the flow, preferably split into two separate sentences. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 09:23, April 27, 2020 (UTC)
  • Since we can clearly see Crys' face unmasked, the info about the eyes and skin in the clone trooper reference is unnecessary and can be sourced to the episode itself. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 08:48, April 28, 2020 (UTC)
    • Fixed. TK-462 (talk) 01:09, April 29, 2020 (UTC)
      • That information is still in the reference and should be removed. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 07:15, May 1, 2020 (UTC)
        • I was testing to see if you saw through the lies of the Jedi, you passed. Oh and it's fixed. TK-462 (talk) 08:00, May 1, 2020 (UTC)
          • The height didn't need to be removed. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 12:35, May 1, 2020 (UTC)
  • The intro can be expanded a bit to elaborate on Crys' actions. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 14:15, May 1, 2020 (UTC)
    • Added a sentance to help expand on his actions and skills. TK-462 (talk) 14:47, May 1, 2020 (UTC)
      • Now there's an inconsistency, intro says he dismantled many droids while body says he dismantled one of them. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 15:58, May 1, 2020 (UTC)
        • My bad! That should be the last issue for that particular problem, lol. TK-462 (talk) 17:33, May 1, 2020 (UTC)
  • You should elaborate more on "the droids" here: "Crys accompanied the AT-TE walkers, Kenobi, and Commander Cody to an escape pod, and inspected a destroyed B1 battle droid for any possible intelligence before deducing that the droids were too damaged for any reliable information to be extracted." Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 17:47, May 1, 2020 (UTC)
    • Fixed. I believe that was a continuity error from the original article that I missed, so I just removed the plural. TK-462 (talk) 17:18, May 4, 2020 (UTC)
Ben
  • Both clauses in the first biography sentence start with "was a." This should be revised.
  • I have some gripes with the final paragraph:
    • "Later, General Kenobi asked if they found any data, to which they briefed him that the droid's escape pod crashed to avoid a mid-air collision with another pod, which was the remaining escape pod that needed to be located." Firstly I think it would sound better if you wrote it like "When Kenobi later asked if they had found any date, they brief him&hellip"
    • The latter two clauses for the sentence above start similarly and so I'd rather see the final clause attached to the part about Grevious heading for the pod.
    • "General Grievous was heading towards that same escape pod, and Cody was able to pinpoint the pod's location." these two clauses don't look like they relate to each other enough. In addition to the objection above, I think this sentence should also be split so that the last sentence introduced Cody locating the pot and then them going to it and a battle starting, if that makes sense to you. Ben sc01t (Hello there) 21:10, May 16, 2020 (UTC)
Ratts
  • "Intelligence" in the opening links to an Imperial organization.
  • "As Grievous descended upon the planet, his landing craft was damaged and was forced to jettison numerous escape pods, one of which included the general himself." The ship can't be forced to jettison escape pods, but the crew be forced to flee.
  • "…a fellow clone trooper spotted an undamaged battle droid." Not sure "undamaged" is the best word choice here, as that implies the droid is working fine, whereas in the episode it's "unconscious." RattsT (talk) 06:02, May 17, 2020 (UTC)
    • Fixed the above. TK-462 (talk) 17:41, May 25, 2020 (UTC)
QGJ
  • It is general practice for clone trooper articles to establish their relation to Jango Fett in the biography as well, not just the P&T.
  • This sentence should probably be broken in two. During the Clone Wars between the Confederacy of Independent Systems and the Galactic Republic, the Confederacy Supreme Commander of the Droid Army, General Grievous, escaped to the surface of the Outer Rim planet Saleucami in a C-9979 landing craft during the Battle of Saleucami, following an engagement with the Republic Navy between 21 BBY and 20 BBY.
  • I'm assuming that "it" refers to the battle droid here. However, it is also feasible that Kenobi ordered to bring the entire escape pod aboard the walker. Please clarify to avoid any potential confusion. Soon after, a fellow clone trooper spotted an undamaged battle droid inside the escape pod, and Kenobi ordered it to be brought into one of the AT-TE walkers.
  • P&T. Is the fact that the robolobotomy was performed aboard the walker relevant here? Would he have any less skill in that task if it were performed out in the open? He also had the skill to successfully perform a robolobotomy on a B1 battle droid inside an AT-TE walker,
  • Equipment. Based on available information, it's better to clarify that he was equipped with Phase I armor during the Battle of Saleucami specifically. There is a possibility that Crys switched to Phase II armor later on, so we should be careful with the wording here.
    • Fixed the above. TK-462 (talk) 18:09, May 25, 2020 (UTC)
  • (Reviewing note) Keep in mind that "blonde" is a female-only adjective, the male equivivalent being "blond". It is one of the few gender-specific adjectives in English, as it was originally loaned from French. QuiGonJinn Senate seal.svg(Talk) 12:58, May 22, 2020 (UTC)
    • I had no idea, thanks for catching that. TK-462 (talk) 18:09, May 25, 2020 (UTC)
Tommy
  • Image file names need to use underscores instead of spaces.
    • Although I tried to upload a corrected version of the file, the name remains the same. I don't have an option to change the name that I can see, how would I go about doing that? TK-462 (talk) 20:11, May 26, 2020 (UTC)
      • He means the file pipelink in the article. It doesn't get affected if you add underscores like this [[File:Crys_full_armor.png]]. Ben sc01t (Hello there) 20:22, May 26, 2020 (UTC)
        • Got it. I totally misread that and thought it was referring to dashes rather than spaces or something. Fixed. TK-462 (talk) 20:49, May 26, 2020 (UTC)
  • Per precedent on clone articles, you should format the name as "Crys" in the infobox, the first mention in the intro, and the first mention in the body. Subsequent mentions in the intro and body should just be as Crys.
  • In both the intro and body, you need to introduce "Crys" as a nickname.
  • Duplicate link.
  • I wouldn't say clones were "born."
  • "intact—albeit inactive—battle droid" - we don't use dashes like that, they need to be typed as "—"
  • Please add a {{Youmay}} for Crys Taanzer. Tommy-Macaroni 18:50, May 26, 2020 (UTC)
    • Fixed all, except one noted. TK-462 (talk) 20:11, May 26, 2020 (UTC)
  • The biography is looking quite bloated, I recommend splitting it into two subsections with two paragraphs each. Tommy-Macaroni 20:26, June 9, 2020 (UTC)
    • I've reworked it a little bit, I think that the paragraphs are split a little more effectively, and the page should read better now. If you have any issues with how it looks I'm happy to take another look at it of course. TK-462 (talk) 00:53, June 10, 2020 (UTC)
      • Now you have a tiny sentence for one subsection and three massive paragraphs for the second. Ideally, the subsections should be the same length. Furthermore, you don't mention Crys anywhere in the "Battle of Saleucami" section, which is generally an indiction there's excessive context. Tommy-Macaroni 13:06, June 22, 2020 (UTC)
        • I pruned the opening paragraphs (now just the one) to be a bit more concise, and also got each paragraph to roughly the same length. TK-462 (talk) 18:25, June 25, 2020 (UTC)
Fred strikes back
  • Are we sure the yellow markings on his armor are custom? Are they not indicative of rank or something? MasterFredCommerce Guild.svg(talk) 07:02, August 12, 2020 (UTC)
    • Good catch, thank you. TK-462 (talk) 03:39, August 13, 2020 (UTC)
CommanderDeviss327
Editor
Imp
  • Reference: "its events, which include the Crys," something's missing. Imperators II(Talk) 20:04, 15 December 2020 (UTC)
    • Fixed. TK-462 (talk) 05:17, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
  • Is Crys's affiliation in infobox really supposed to be sourced to the generic clone troopers ref? Imperators II(Talk) 22:16, 19 December 2020 (UTC)
    • Yes. The Deserter doesn't explicitly say Crys is part of the GAR, so using the CT DB ref simplifies the referencing overall. TK-462 (talk) 02:09, 22 December 2020 (UTC)
    • Apologize, I totally misunderstood this. Speaking of not explicitly confirming things, I don't believe we can confidently say Crys is part of the 212th anyways. My apologies for these mistakes, I nominated this awhile ago and have learned quite a bit since then, haha. TK-462 (talk) 02:12, 22 December 2020 (UTC)
  • "When Kenobi later asked if the pair had found any data regarding the escape pod's whereabouts" — is this referring to the escape pod that carried Grievous to the planet's surface? Please clarify.
  • "General Grievous was moving with his remaining troops towards the final escape pod" — OK, I don't understand where was Grievous moving from and why. Please explain this.
  • "Once both forces engaged, they engaged" um :P Imperators II(Talk) 09:43, 22 December 2020 (UTC)

Comments

  • I've fixed that for you, but for future nominations, please create em dashes (—) by typing "—" and en dashes (–) by typing "–" per the Manual of Style. Same goes for ellipsis (…), which can be created by typing "…." TanDivoInsignia-SenateMurders.svg Anıl Şerifoğlu (talk) 01:51, June 7, 2020 (UTC)
    • Understood, thank you for the heads up. TK-462 (talk) 17:48, June 7, 2020 (UTC)


Ginder

  • Nominated by: OtterSurf (talk) 12:22, May 12, 2020 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments:

(0 ACs/2 Users/2 Total)

(Votes required: 3 AC vote(s) required to reach minimum. No additional votes required to pass, please consider reviewing another article.)

Support

  1. QuiGonJinn Senate seal.svg(Talk) 09:57, May 26, 2020 (UTC)
  2. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 13:13, July 6, 2020 (UTC)

Object

Imp
  • Publication date. Imperators II(Talk) 14:05, May 12, 2020 (UTC)
  • Implement {{WizardsCite}}. Imperators II(Talk) 14:05, May 12, 2020 (UTC)
    • Done. OtterSurf (talk) 18:27, May 12, 2020 (UTC)
      • In the reference, too. And move what you have under Sources to Appearances and remove the Sources section. Imperators II(Talk) 08:45, May 13, 2020 (UTC)
  • What evidence is there for placing the subject in the Rise of the Empire era? Imperators II(Talk) 14:05, May 12, 2020 (UTC)
    • The supplement outright states that it takes place then. OtterSurf (talk) 18:37, May 12, 2020 (UTC)
      • That may be, but the article needs to provide in-universe reasoning for that in the body. Imperators II(Talk) 08:45, May 13, 2020 (UTC)
        • Having re-checked the supplement, it actually states that Head Trip can take place in any era, so I'm now not sure the eras field even applies. OtterSurf (talk) 09:22, May 13, 2020 (UTC)
        • Never mind, fixed. OtterSurf (talk) 11:51, May 18, 2020 (UTC)
          • What you have there right now makes no sense. The adventure is explicitly set in the Rise of the Empire era, which is set between 1000 BBY and 0 BBY, so you can work from that. Is the Galactic Republic mentioned as existing in the adventure? If so, that narrows it down to 1000 BBY and 19 BBY. I believe the Living Force Campaign Guide also establishes a date for the colonization of the Cularin system, so that can be used as another boundary for the date range. And then you should try and determine whether the adventure ties in any way with the events of the Living Force campaign, which may tie down the events to before, during, or after 31 BBY. Imperators II(Talk) 17:43, May 25, 2020 (UTC)
            • Just reread the supplement, and I quote: "Note that while Head Trip takes place in the setting established in The Living Force Campaign Guide, the events, places, and individuals in this adventure don't come from the RPGA's Living Force campaign. The Cularin system holds a wealth of possibilities for exciting adventures, and Gamemasters shouldn't feel constrained by the Living Force campaign when designing their own home games. Head Trip is an example of how to put your own spin on the setting". So does that mean the era field doesn't even apply here, or what? OtterSurf (talk) 18:27, May 25, 2020 (UTC)
              • It does apply. Per the first sentence you quoted, I believe we can safely assume that the events of the adventure take place concurrently with the events of the Living Force. Take the date from the Living Force Campaign Guide and use it with "around." Imperators II(Talk) 18:38, May 25, 2020 (UTC)
                • Great. Done. OtterSurf (talk) 18:43, May 25, 2020 (UTC)
                  • The current ref note erroneously uses 32 BBY, not 31 BBY, and it doesn't mention the adventure at all. Imperators II(Talk) 07:51, May 26, 2020 (UTC)
  • The Essential Atlas does not mention Genarius, please revise your referencing. Imperators II(Talk) 14:05, May 12, 2020 (UTC)
    • Corrected. OtterSurf (talk) 18:27, May 12, 2020 (UTC)
      • That is not what you had to do, OtterSurf. Take a look at the articles you've previously brought to status to see what needs to be put there. Imperators II(Talk) 08:45, May 13, 2020 (UTC)
  • I'm seeing an error in the lead quote, so correct that and go through all the others and check them, too. Imperators II(Talk) 14:10, May 12, 2020 (UTC)
  • Our article for the droid model is named incorrectly, that needs to be corrected. Imperators II(Talk) 14:10, May 12, 2020 (UTC)
  • Please split up the largest paragraph of the article and add an image. Imperators II(Talk) 14:12, May 12, 2020 (UTC)
    • Paragraph split. What image can I use, though? Head Trip doesn't provide any. OtterSurf (talk) 18:27, May 12, 2020 (UTC)
      • You can use images of related subjects from other sources. For example, we have an image of Genarius. Imperators II(Talk) 08:45, May 13, 2020 (UTC)
Shayanomer
  • If the Bimm are a furred species, then specifying this in the article for a single Bimm is unnecessary. It's like saying Chewbacca was a hairy Wookiee.
    • Bimms come in two flavours: furry and humanoid. I have removed a redundant mention of it, though. OtterSurf (talk) 11:23, May 18, 2020 (UTC)
  • Attire goes into Equipment, not P&T.
  • Reviewing note: Equipment always goes under the P&T, and below Skills if present. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 09:31, May 18, 2020 (UTC)
  • Species comes before gender. Please reflect this in the article. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 12:08, July 6, 2020 (UTC)
  • The intro can be expanded slightly with more details on the events surrounding the head.
    • Added info about the cantina fight. OtterSurf (talk) 12:43, July 6, 2020 (UTC)
  • Does the source italicize "Falling Rodian"?
  • If a subject only has one appearance, then saying "first appeared" is unnecessary. See the recent EC meeting log for more details.
    • Done. Also reflected in the BTS. OtterSurf (talk) 12:31, July 6, 2020 (UTC)
      • Umm, you did not need to remove "1st" from Appearances, that was only for the BTS. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 12:47, July 6, 2020 (UTC)
  • Per precedent, you need to state that the article assumes the adventure plays out as described in the source. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 12:19, July 6, 2020 (UTC)
QGJ
  • Reference 2 provides a firm date for the adventure. This date is not present in the article itself. QuiGonJinn Senate seal.svg(Talk) 10:04, May 25, 2020 (UTC)
Tommy
  • Preliminaries:
    • Please implement an Oxford comma.
      • Done, I think. OtterSurf (talk) 15:54, June 8, 2020 (UTC)
        • No you haven't. Please take some time to research what an Oxford comma is and try again. The MoS would be a good place to start, although the first page of a google search of that term also explains it well.
          • I know what it is, thank you. I'm not sure where it applies here. I'll take another look. OtterSurf (talk) 08:58, June 9, 2020 (UTC)
          • Done. I've put it after "muzzle". OtterSurf (talk) 09:22, June 9, 2020 (UTC)
    • Please make the formatting of Head Trip consistent.
      • Done. OtterSurf (talk) 15:58, June 8, 2020 (UTC)
        • No you haven't. Sometimes it is italicised, sometimes it is in quotes. Which is correct? And I have no idea why you've removed the template from ref 2.
    • File links in the body should be formatted "file:name | thumb | location | size | caption."
      • Size? OtterSurf (talk) 15:54, June 8, 2020 (UTC)
        • Yes, that's what's missing. Please specify it.
    • Please implement — instead of —.
    • Watch out for formatting issues like double spaces. Tommy-Macaroni 18:11, June 6, 2020 (UTC)
      • I've been over the article with a fine tooth comb and can't find that. Where is it? OtterSurf (talk) 15:54, June 8, 2020 (UTC)
        • Yeah, I doubt that. You have two instances of double spaces in this article which can be easily found by using ctrl+f or your computer's equivalent. These are very simple objections Otter, they shouldn't be requiring this much effort from either of us. Tommy-Macaroni 22:04, June 8, 2020 (UTC)
          • I don't have that option available since I'm on an Android phone. This would move a lot faster if you just told me where the double spaces are. As above, I'll check again. OtterSurf (talk) 08:58, June 9, 2020 (UTC)
            • I appreciate the difficulty of you being on mobile, and that you may not have any choice in the matter, but I'm afraid this really isn't ideal for article nominations. I can see just from my previous objections here that you being on a phone has made addressing these far more difficult than they ought to be, and I'm afraid this will make nominations more lengthy and difficult for both you and reviewers. But regardless, while I could tell you were they are, that doesn't help you become a better writer for future projects. According to these two pages, a version of ctrl+f is available on android. Please do some research into this, as find text is an invaluable tool in article writing you really need to know how to perform. Tommy-Macaroni 12:02, June 9, 2020 (UTC)
              • Alright. Done that. Chrome tells me that there's only one double space in the article, but won't show me where it is. A visual scan of the marked page shows only single spaces. I'm starting to find this extremely frustrating. OtterSurf (talk) 12:43, June 12, 2020 (UTC)
                • Yeah don't get sassy with me, you chose to nominate this article on mobile and the restrictions that come with it, so you really shouldn't be surprised at the fact that you have to find ways to work around those restrictions. Now, I can assure you there are two instances of double spaces in the article. If Chrome isn't working properly, have you tried copy-pasting the contents of the article into another app, one with a better find text feature, or even better, a find and replace tool? I sympathise with the restrictions of mobile but, to be blunt, you don't seem to be trying very hard to find alternative solutions to those restrictions. You are a regular article nominator, so you knowing how to perform a text search is imperative. I can guarantee you will need to do so for future nominations. And yes, I could tell you where the double spaces are, that does nothing to help you as a writer. Self-sufficiency is a requirement of nominating, and it is not the job of reviewers to construct and modify articles for nominators who don't know how to or can't do it themselves. Your nomination is your responsibility. So, instead of complaining about my objection, please put some effort in and find a way for you to access a text search. Tommy-Macaroni 13:58, June 12, 2020 (UTC)
                  • Uh, I'm not getting sassy with you. Think you misread my comment. Anyway, I've run the text of the article through a double-space removal tool. All double spaces should be absent now. OtterSurf (talk) 15:35, June 12, 2020 (UTC)
Anil
  • There are at least two links that are not formatted properly.
    • Fixed. The Wizards one might still need doing, though. OtterSurf (talk) 15:38, June 12, 2020 (UTC)
      • Yes, there's another one in that Wizards reference note. TanDivoInsignia-SenateMurders.svg Anıl Şerifoğlu (talk) 15:48, June 12, 2020 (UTC)
        • I meant the WOTC pipelink. Fixed. OtterSurf (talk) 16:55, June 12, 2020 (UTC)
          • No, the one you've just changed was actually properly formatted before you changed it. I'm talking about the one in the reference note #2. TanDivoInsignia-SenateMurders.svg Anıl Şerifoğlu (talk) 17:27, June 12, 2020 (UTC)
            • Ah. Well, now it's fixed. OtterSurf (talk) 18:39, June 12, 2020 (UTC)
  • Please fix the placement of quotation marks in BTS, per this item of the Manual of Style: "Per standards of American English, double quotation marks (" ") should be used and the period (full stop), comma, question and exclamation marks should be within the quotation."
  • As far as I can see, Cularin system's criminal organization has its own article, which should be linked in this article. TanDivoInsignia-SenateMurders.svg Anıl Şerifoğlu (talk) 14:33, June 11, 2020 (UTC)

Comments

Minka

  • Nominated by: OtterSurf (talk) 10:35, May 18, 2020 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: Meow.

(0 ACs/2 Users/2 Total)

(Votes required: 3 AC vote(s) required to reach minimum. No additional votes required to pass, please consider reviewing another article.)

Support

  1. QuiGonJinn Senate seal.svg(Talk) 07:13, June 1, 2020 (UTC)
  2. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 20:20, August 28, 2020 (UTC)

Object

Spooky
  • While the Biography has her homeworld, it is missing from the infobox.
    • How the hell did I miss that? Fixed. OtterSurf (talk) 10:38, May 20, 2020 (UTC)
  • The ref note for her species input of the infobox should be worded to specifically mention how that defines Minka as Cantrosian. The years are not necessary in that note, nor is 'finally' named. Just that the species from the prior source, of which Minka was a part, was identified as such.
  • The intro could be expanded for an article of this size.
    • Done. OtterSurf (talk) 10:47, May 20, 2020 (UTC)
      • I still think two or three more sentences than is now there would suit best.spookywillowwtalk 21:30, May 20, 2020 (UTC)
        • Really think that's as long as I can make it. OtterSurf (talk) 10:48, May 21, 2020 (UTC)
          • While the additions made it longer, the majority of the introduction now consists of run-on sentences that could be split.spookywillowwtalk 18:10, May 23, 2020 (UTC)
  • I believe that her colleagues (Sami/Durne) could be introduced at the end of the first paragraph. She clearly had been working with them before she lost her wingmates, so it would logically suit to note that she had met them at some point by the time of the X-wing incident.
  • The last sentence of the P&T seems like a run-on, it should be able to split into two sentences.
  • The author of the comic issue she appears in should be specified.spookywillowwtalk 21:45, May 19, 2020 (UTC)
TQG
  • Please add subject categories to the images of her used in the article and place {{Imagecat}} into the article once a category for images of her is created. Toqgers (talk) 03:39, May 20, 2020 (UTC)
Shayanomer
  • As I pointed out in Ginder's nomination, Equipment goes below Skills.
  • Do Minka's faction and the Imperial cell not have articles of their own?
    • Do they need articles? I don't think they'd be very substantial, even for potential CAs. OtterSurf (talk) 09:28, May 21, 2020 (UTC)
  • Context and linking for Millennium Falcon.
  • "With Durne's treachery exposed and the traitor himself in custody." This is the first time you mention a "traitor" in the article. It's not clear who this is referring to. Reword if it's Durne.
  • Any starships the character has used can be detailed in Equipment.
  • Full release date for comic required. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 20:14, May 20, 2020 (UTC)
    • Done. OtterSurf (talk) 09:28, May 21, 2020 (UTC)
      • I don't believe this can be sourced to the comic itself. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 09:34, May 21, 2020 (UTC)
        • No, of course not. Fixed. OtterSurf (talk) 10:34, May 21, 2020 (UTC)
          • Have you verified that this source provides the date used in the article? Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 10:46, May 21, 2020 (UTC)
  • You mention that she is a Cantrosian female twice in the body, when it is only required once.
  • I can see some space for sub-sectioning in the biography.
    • When you introduce sub-sections in the body, nothing should be left out; all information should be under those sub-sections. Also, single-paragraph sub-sections should be avoided where possible. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 13:53, July 6, 2020 (UTC)
      • That's cleared a lot up, thanks. Done. OtterSurf (talk) 14:14, July 6, 2020 (UTC)
        • I'm sure there's another quote you can add under the second sub-section. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 14:16, July 6, 2020 (UTC)
  • "More Cantrosian Y-wings appeared and shot the Falcon down, forcing the ship to land in a gully." "Shot down" means the ship was knocked out of the sky, but we know this isn't the case in the next part of this sentence. Try substituting it with something else.
  • Context for Niru.
  • Minka hiding with Organa is sourced to the Hyperspace link, which doesn't seem to be in the Appearances or Sources. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 13:07, July 6, 2020 (UTC)
QGJ
  • Reference 4 needs more work. I don't see how it relates in any way to Minka, especially since it mentions Lumiya for some reason, who isn't mentioned in the article proper.
    • That's going to be tricky, but I'm up for it. Watch this space. OtterSurf (talk) 20:49, May 26, 2020 (UTC)
    • Done. OtterSurf (talk) 21:00, May 26, 2020 (UTC)
      • What if the Battle of Endor was fought in the last days of 4 ABY? Then "weeks after" would be 5 ABY. In order for this ref to work, you need to establish how far into 4 ABY the Battle of Endor took place (with an attributable source, obviously). QuiGonJinn Senate seal.svg(Talk) 07:10, May 29, 2020 (UTC)
        • Rechecked TNEC and done. OtterSurf (talk) 08:20, May 29, 2020 (UTC)
  • Unless a source explicitly describes her hair as being "marmalade-colored," we should avoid such flowery prose.
  • The word "figurehead" usually bears a negative connotation, meaning a fake ruler who is controlled by a more powerful individual behind the scenes. I wouldn't apply this term to Han, Luke and Leia.
  • The beginning of the bio mentions only Minka joining the Rebellion, yet later you mention "her Rebellion-loyal" faction back on her homeworld, as if she had been a member of this group before joining the Rebellion. If so, then this fact should be established earlier.
  • What was Durne's motive for manipulating the factions of Cantros-7? QuiGonJinn Senate seal.svg(Talk) 10:44, May 26, 2020 (UTC)
    • The Nagai Knife recruited him to sow discord. I'll work it in. OtterSurf (talk) 20:49, May 26, 2020 (UTC)
    • Done. OtterSurf (talk) 21:00, May 26, 2020 (UTC)
Anil
  • Preliminaries:
    • File links in the body should be formatted "file:name | thumb | location | size | caption."
    • {{Hyperspace}} is not formatted properly.
      • How? Archive links don't exist. OtterSurf (talk) 15:40, June 8, 2020 (UTC)
        • Empty "int" field. TanDivoInsignia-SenateMurders.svg Anıl Şerifoğlu (talk) 21:52, June 8, 2020 (UTC)
          • That's not required. Says so on the template page. OtterSurf (talk) 08:52, June 9, 2020 (UTC)
            • But that doesn't mean you should keep an empty field you don't use when formatting the template, does it? TanDivoInsignia-SenateMurders.svg Anıl Şerifoğlu (talk) 09:20, June 9, 2020 (UTC)
              • Ahhhhhh! Of course. Fixed. OtterSurf (talk) 09:24, June 9, 2020 (UTC)
    • Many links/pipelinks in the article are not formatted properly.
      • Can you point those out? OtterSurf (talk) 15:43, June 8, 2020 (UTC)
        • [[Wingmate/Legends|wingmate]]s, ''[[Millennium Falcon/Legends|Millennium Falcon]]'', and countless more. TanDivoInsignia-SenateMurders.svg Anıl Şerifoğlu (talk) 21:52, June 8, 2020 (UTC)
    • Missing categories.
      • And those are? OtterSurf (talk) 15:40, June 8, 2020 (UTC)
        • For starters, isn't she a member of the Rebel Alliance? TanDivoInsignia-SenateMurders.svg Anıl Şerifoğlu (talk) 21:52, June 8, 2020 (UTC)
          • That's never stated outright, just that Minka and her faction are loyal to it. OtterSurf (talk) 08:50, June 9, 2020 (UTC)
    • What is the page number for the section that provides the release date for the comic in Marvel Age #23 exactly? TanDivoInsignia-SenateMurders.svg Anıl Şerifoğlu (talk) 06:48, June 8, 2020 (UTC)
      • The cover states the date, while Catspaw is listed on page 5. OtterSurf (talk) 15:31, June 8, 2020 (UTC)

Comments

Assertor-class Command Dreadnought

(0 ACs/3 Users/3 Total)

(Votes required: 3 AC vote(s) required to reach minimum. No additional votes required to pass, please consider reviewing another article.)

Support

  1. Ben sc01t (Hello there) 15:19, May 20, 2020 (UTC)
  2. RattsT (talk) 20:25, May 23, 2020 (UTC)
  3. Everything looks great! CIS roundel.svg Erebus Chronus Open frequency 19:09, June 16, 2020 (UTC)

Object

Tommy
  • The intro needs to be a lot larger than one sentence for an article of this size.
  • I think a proofread may be beneficial. Why is "Information" capitalised, link for the Legends version, etc.
    • Ah the BTS section escaped my proofread. I check the rest of the article as well and moved some things around in the characteristics section to have it read better.--Vitus InfinitusTalk 16:58, May 18, 2020 (UTC)
  • Is there any more stuff for Roles? For the Secutor, there was a fair bit of stuff about how the ship was used in battle, which we still need to use if it's not obviously game mechanics. Tommy-Macaroni 16:39, May 18, 2020 (UTC)
    • Unfortunately the section for the ship in the book covers only one page, half of which is dedicated for its statistics. There isn't anything more I can use that doesn't include suggestions for in-game encounters--Vitus InfinitusTalk 16:58, May 18, 2020 (UTC)
  • BTS can be paragraphed. Some of those sentences are also run-ons.
  • Wasn't the Assertor designed by Ansel Hsiao for TEGTW? If so, please look to the Secutor for the best way to incorporate this info. Tommy-Macaroni 11:58, June 5, 2020 (UTC)
    • Added. Let me know if this is good or if further tweaks and changes are needed--Vitus InfinitusTalk 21:14, June 8, 2020 (UTC)
      • I think the order for the BTS is now a little odd. I think you need to mention Hsiao designed it much earlier (this will likely need an additional ref like on Secutor), then say how it was used in EGTW, then say that although the book only mentions the class once by name (I think, you'll need to check), some of Hsiao's specifications were approved by Lucasfilm. Tommy-Macaroni 20:43, June 9, 2020 (UTC)
  • You'll also need either an {{Otheruses}} or {{Youmay}} for Assertor. Tommy-Macaroni 12:02, June 5, 2020 (UTC)
  • "in the 2020 supplement Starships and Speeders" - supplement to what? I'd like to see Star Wars Roleplaying linked, and I also think "sourcebook" is a better descriptor for the source.
  • I think the last BTS paragraph should be inserted after the first BTS sentence, followed by a line break. That way the first paragraph deals with canon material, and the second deals with Legends. That should also make the two paragraphs more equal in length.
    • Done--Vitus InfinitusTalk 23:15, July 8, 2020 (UTC)
      • Now you skip from the canon introduction to Legends design, back to the canon image, then back to Legends origins. What I'd like to see is the canon introduction in S&S and comments on the canon image making up the first paragraph. Then in the second I'd like to see discussion on Hsiao's design, how it made it into Legends and the stuff about Lucasfilm Licensing. Tommy-Macaroni 14:00, July 22, 2020 (UTC)
        • Okay, rearranged accordingly--Vitus InfinitusTalk 22:33, July 26, 2020 (UTC)
          • Please place the Hsiao sentence at the start of the second paragraph as I originally suggested, so at least the Legends information is in chronological order. This also factors into my last objection, as it isn't interesting to say the Legends model had stuff in canon that wasn't in the book, that's only interesting because it was Fanon that become official. Therefore the Hsiao sentence needs to come first so the reader understands why they're being told the stuff about Tumblr. Tommy-Macaroni 22:13, July 29, 2020 (UTC)
  • The correct phasing we're trying to use is "the Star Wars Legends continuity".
  • "Although it was only mentioned in the book" - Was the Assertor mentioned only by name in EGTW, or was there an accompanying image? If it's the former, I'd say something like "only mentioned by name."
    • That info was still subject to change as I was waiting for clarification but didn't get it until now. It appears that it's only pictured in the book. I changed the wording to reflect it.--Vitus InfinitusTalk 15:33, July 9, 2020 (UTC)
      • Nevermind, finally found where it's named in the book and reconfirmed that it is the only place in the book where it's named.--Vitus InfinitusTalk 15:44, July 9, 2020 (UTC)
  • I think we can get some additional context for the Assertor design being approved by Lucasfilm. Secutor has it as "Fry stated in his Tumblr endnotes that the name and some of Hsiao's specifications had been approved by Lucasfilm." I think that wording is pretty good, and if the Endnotes say so, I think it'd be good to be more specific on these specifications, such as if there was an image also canonised? Tommy-Macaroni 14:56, July 2, 2020 (UTC)
    • Further specified on the BTS. As for the image, Essential Guide includes an Assertor on a page, but I don't see where the image is said to be canon--Vitus InfinitusTalk 15:33, July 9, 2020 (UTC)
      • OK, but can you explicitly mention that Fry said in his endnotes some of Hsiao's specifications, such as the length, had been approved by Lucasfilm? The length itself being canonised isn't the interesting thing, it's the fact that some of Hsiao's specifications were canonised independently of EGTW that's interesting. Tommy-Macaroni 14:00, July 22, 2020 (UTC)
        • I further clarified.--Vitus InfinitusTalk 22:33, July 26, 2020 (UTC)
          • "the following information" - what following information? Tommy-Macaroni 22:13, July 29, 2020 (UTC)
  • OK, I'm reasonably happy with the BTS now, now onto the meat of the article. In the history, you say "hundreds of TIE line starfighters." First, can't we just say they're TIE/ln fighters? They all look like regular TIEs.. Second, does S&S actually say hundreds, or have you counted them yourself? Also, just on from that bit, I think you can also describe the celestial bodies' colour, seeing as how there's so little other history stuff to present.
  • Is the agent described in the history section actually an Agent (note capitalisation) of the Alliance? As in, did they hold the specific rank of Agent, or are they just described as a "rebel agent" or something? If it's the latter, the link to agent needs to be removed. Tommy-Macaroni 19:50, August 6, 2020 (UTC)
  • Lots of duplicate links.
  • With the new source, can we get any more images?
    • Only other image is a mirrored version of the one in the infobox.--Vitus InfinitusTalk 00:29, August 29, 2020 (UTC)
      • Interesting. Now, I'm thinking we should probably use the original image for the infobox, but what do you think? Tommy-Macaroni 10:39, August 31, 2020 (UTC)
        • I think it's best to use the original one from Lead by Example and maybe note that it was later mirrored in the BTS.--Vitus InfinitusTalk 16:26, August 31, 2020 (UTC)
          • Honestly I think noting that in the BTS is kinda superfluous, FFG do this sort of thing quite frequently. It was only mentioned originally because the image was brought over from Legends to canon, not because of the mirroring. Tommy-Macaroni 16:43, August 31, 2020 (UTC)
  • Characteristics is looking incredibly daunting currently, I'd like to see some subsectioning.
    • Done, let me know if these subheading titles work--Vitus InfinitusTalk 00:29, August 29, 2020 (UTC)
      • Subheading titles look good, but I think it may be an idea to break each subsection up into two paragraphs each, as they're still looking quite chunky. Tommy-Macaroni 10:39, August 31, 2020 (UTC)
  • Please refer to Wookieepedia:Manual of Style#Formatting:
    • "But do not link individual words within proper compound nouns (examples: [[Death]] [[Star]], [[Color|Azure]] [[Dianoga]] [[Cantina]], [[The galaxy|Galactic]] Empire, ''[[Bantha]]''-class assault shuttle)"
    • "Italics: [[Subjugator (Imperial II-class)|''Subjugator'']], not ''[[Subjugator (Imperial II-class)|Subjugator]]''"
      • Fixed--Vitus InfinitusTalk 00:29, August 29, 2020 (UTC)
        • I'm still seeing instances of both these errors. Tommy-Macaroni 10:39, August 31, 2020 (UTC)
          • I found one more, but not sure where the others are, specifically the first objection.--Vitus InfinitusTalk 16:26, August 31, 2020 (UTC)
            • I can see one of the first type in the intro, and one of the second in History. Tommy-Macaroni 16:43, August 31, 2020 (UTC)
  • At a glance, the intro is looking a little small. Is there any more relevant stuff that can be added? Tommy-Macaroni 21:45, August 28, 2020 (UTC)
    • Not sure, I think I have good coverage since in the intro I cover some of its characteristics, roles, and history. I can probably add a few more details, if you think that's necessary.--Vitus InfinitusTalk 00:29, August 29, 2020 (UTC)
      • What details do you have in mind? Tommy-Macaroni 10:39, August 31, 2020 (UTC)
        • Just more specific information like number and type of armament in the second intro paragraph, and detail that they were introduced after the Battle of Yavin in the same paragraph.--Vitus InfinitusTalk 16:26, August 31, 2020 (UTC)
          • I think a brief overview of those characteristics and when it was introduced could be nice. Tommy-Macaroni 16:43, August 31, 2020 (UTC)
  • Now we have an individual ship called the Assertor in canon, along with its battle group, please create Assertor (disambiguation). Tommy-Macaroni 21:48, August 28, 2020 (UTC)
  • Please add a {{Mediacat}}. Tommy-Macaroni 10:39, August 31, 2020 (UTC)
  • Looking at the BTS, I'm thinking the details on the mirrored image and the Tumblr info is irrelevant. The latter is only relevant in the Secutor article because that's how the name was introduced into Legends, which is then relevant for the canon article. For this subject, the name origin is via EGTW, so the Tumblr info isn't adding anything relevant to the canon subject. With those gone the BTS can probably be reduced to one paragraph.
  • Templates should be using underscores instead of spaces in the same way files should.
  • "it was assumed" Assumed by whom?
  • "anti-Rebel Alliance operations." Please refer to WP:DASH. Tommy-Macaroni 17:25, September 26, 2020 (UTC)
    • Lead by Example uses anti-Alliance, should I write that or anti - Rebel Alliance? I figured this was similar to how anti-air or anti-surface missiles are written in English and on the Wook.--Vitus InfinitusTalk 17:47, September 26, 2020 (UTC)
      • If it was just "anti-rebel" or "anti-alliance," then it should be a simple hyphen, but since the "anti" is attached the proper noun combination "Rebel Alliance," it needs an en dash ("anti–Rebel Alliance"). Tommy-Macaroni 09:15, October 19, 2020 (UTC)
        • Fixed--Vitus InfinitusTalk 16:20, October 19, 2020 (UTC)
          • Now it says anti–Alliance, a combination I specifically said only needed a hyphen. I literally typed out exactly what you needed to add to the article. Tommy-Macaroni 16:28, October 19, 2020 (UTC)
            • Now it's fixed. Sorry, I have an exam and I didn't get sleep.--Vitus InfinitusTalk 16:38, October 19, 2020 (UTC)
              • It's not a problem. However, I would still recommend going with "anti–Rebel Alliance," as I feel it's better to give a more formal name to the Alliance when it's first being mentioned. Tommy-Macaroni 22:06, October 19, 2020 (UTC)
                • Switched--Vitus InfinitusTalk 22:38, October 19, 2020 (UTC)
                  • En dash, please. That was the very basis of this objection in the first place. Tommy-Macaroni 22:43, October 19, 2020 (UTC)
    • Jesus, I'm sorry Tommy. If I could I'd buy a round on me--Vitus InfinitusTalk 22:56, October 19, 2020 (UTC)
      • Hey don't worry about it, exam stress can be brutal. And I'll hold you to that if I ever make it to Florida :P Tommy-Macaroni 23:01, October 19, 2020 (UTC)
Shayanomer
Ben
  • Starships and Speeders is not even mentioned in the BTS. Is there a reason for that? Ben sc01t (Hello there) 09:25, May 20, 2020 (UTC)
  • I think it would be good to list the authors of Starships and Speeders in the BTS as well, even if there's half a dozen of them. Ben sc01t (Hello there) 14:57, May 20, 2020 (UTC)
    • Sorry to interject here, but per precedent (Oppressor), listing the authors in this case is superfluous. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 15:16, May 20, 2020 (UTC)
Ratts
  • Seeing as there's an image of the ship from Starships and Speeders, shouldn't the "First mentioned" tag be changed to "First appearance?" RattsT (talk) 07:22, May 21, 2020 (UTC)
    • From my understanding it's "first mentioned" when it comes from a source despite there being an image.--Vitus InfinitusTalk 15:13, May 21, 2020 (UTC)
      • Ah, alright then. RattsT (talk) 16:36, May 21, 2020 (UTC)
Anil
  • Personally, I find adding the Legends version of the ship in {{Otheruses}} unnecessary since Canon/Legends tabs exist for that reason.
  • I don't think "the Assertor" is really an alternate for the ship. It's just a shortened version like the Venator, or the Falcon.
  • I think it's safe to say the Star Destroyers that accompany the Assertor in the image are Imperial II-class.
  • Per precedent, {{RPGseed}} is only used for events that are affected by player's choice, and as far as I can see, the bit about the rebel captive is not affected by player's choice at all. If that's the case, the template should be removed.
  • I know this probably sounds dumb, but I don't think Steve Hamilton actually mentions his real name anywhere in his DeviantArt account. Because of that, I think it'd be nice to have another source that proves "Balance-Sheet" is indeed Hamilton's nickname. TanDivoInsignia-SenateMurders.svg Anıl Şerifoğlu (talk) 15:13, June 12, 2020 (UTC)
Toprawa
  • The Manual of Style explicitly tells us not to refer to starships using "she"/"her" pronouns. Please revise in both instances of the article. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 18:38, 24 October 2020 (UTC)
    • Apologies, that's how it was in the source. Fixed-- Vitus InfinitusTalk 18:29, 25 October 2020 (UTC)
  • Question: Does the source actually present the figure like this? "1,100,000,000 credits"
  • I'm going to recommend creating articles for "sensor suite" and "communications suite," and then linking to them accordingly
  • Question: Would AT-series walkers not be a sub-item of Ground combat vehicles? Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 01:56, 8 December 2020 (UTC)
    • The source doesn't group them together, the exact quote is in the infobox saying, "Vehicle Complement: Numerous shuttles, landing craft, gunboats, assault craft, landing barges, ground assault vehicles, AT-series walkers." --Vitus InfinitusTalk 02:52, 8 December 2020 (UTC)

Comments


Drolen Antig

  • Nominated by: OtterSurf (talk) 09:45, May 20, 2020 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: Smuggled a shipment of glitterstim through customs at Phindar Spaceport by hiding it up his backside, apparently

(0 ACs/1 Users/1 Total)

(Votes required: 3 AC vote(s) required to reach minimum. Additional 1 user or 1 AC vote required to pass.)

Support

  1. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 16:04, September 1, 2020 (UTC)

Object

Shayanomer
  • The intro is way too short for three paragraphs in the biography. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 17:40, May 21, 2020 (UTC)
  • Do the sources state that he smuggled goods on those smuggling routes? If so, then the info on both of those can be combined better in the biography. Otherwise, split them into two sentences.
  • In the first paragraph, is there a reason to use two separate Sources to cite the info about Pirik after citing "Outer Rim"?
    • Yes. Only Corint City is mentioned in Antig's profile; where it is, namely Pirik, is from another source. OtterSurf (talk) 10:19, July 9, 2020 (UTC)
      • Then you will need to include a note stating that the source identifies the planet that the city is on as Pirik. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 10:51, July 9, 2020 (UTC)
  • You need to elaborate on the "technology" when it's first mentioned in the second paragraph instead of the third paragraph, as you call it a "valuable resource," which isn't explained very well there.
  • "The criminals needed a transport, and so Antig offered his own ship, the Trustworthy, for the job." Please restructure this sentence to improve its flow.
  • His work with the Advosze thieves should be mentioned before the heist, as all information needs to be in chronological order.
  • "The heist was a success, but Antig and his crew killed the Advosze..." This is the first and only time you mention any sort of "crew" in the biography separate from the Advosze.
  • "New Republic forces were quick to act, attempting to locate Antig, who had been spotted in the Ethav Regions after the heist, and resolving to retrieve the stolen components before Kuat Drive Yards could use the technology in designs for the Empire." Please restructure this to reduce it's run-on nature.
  • "He was not entirely trusted by his crew of thirty fellow lowlifes and criminals, and had stolen his trousers from a Corellian." This information should be in the biography, especially the composition of his crew. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 13:47, July 6, 2020 (UTC)
    • Done. This fixed the objection above as well. OtterSurf (talk) 10:35, July 9, 2020 (UTC)
  • The trousers can be added to Equipment.
  • "He ran with a crew of thirty lowlifes and criminals, none of whom entirely trusted the Nalroni, and had stolen his trousers from a Corellian." This sounds like the crew stole his trousers. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 10:51, July 9, 2020 (UTC)
    • Yeah, I read that back and it read poorly. I moved the trousers to Equipment per the objection above. OtterSurf (talk) 11:09, July 9, 2020 (UTC)
      • The fact that he "stole" something at one point is biographical information. Keep that info there. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 11:13, July 9, 2020 (UTC)
        • Added. The fact that Antig wore the trousers is mentioned in Equipment so it feels less redundant. OtterSurf (talk) 11:36, July 9, 2020 (UTC)
  • I'm certain you can add an image of some kind to the Biography (i.e. the location of the heist). Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 20:08, August 31, 2020 (UTC)
    • Done. OtterSurf (talk) 09:40, September 1, 2020 (UTC)
      • Can you position it lower and increase the size? Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 14:05, September 1, 2020 (UTC)
Zed
  • If he was spotted in the Ethav Regions after the heist, this should be added to the Biography.
  • His starship should be mentioned in the Equipment section.
  • Is the attribution of quotes to Pash Cracken correct? Other articles related to "Wanted by Cracken" (such as Ethav Regions or "Wanted by Cracken" itself) attribute quotes to Airen Cracken. Zed42 (talk) 21:13, May 21, 2020 (UTC)
    • Done, done, corrected. OtterSurf (talk) 09:00, May 22, 2020 (UTC)
  • As per pages such as Ethav Regions, quote attribution should include the in-universe document, and Antig's mention in the datafile should be included on the page. Zed42 (talk) 10:58, May 22, 2020 (UTC)
Spooky
  • I think the year for the Empire's defeat at Endor can be included in the intro, along with context for Endor.
    • Done. OtterSurf (talk) 10:32, May 24, 2020 (UTC)
    • This goes for the context in the intro and the Biography - Endor is a moon; pretty well established. I really don't think 'world' is the best context descriptor for it when we can specify.spookywillowwtalk 04:04, May 26, 2020 (UTC)
  • Endor, Relarr system, Roche asteroid field, and Corint City need context in the Biography.
  • I think the location of the Kuat Drive Yards should be established.
  • The introduction should state Antig's gender.
    • Done. OtterSurf (talk) 10:32, May 24, 2020 (UTC)
      • The gender should always go after the species.spookywillowwtalk 04:04, May 26, 2020 (UTC)
        • Flows better the other way round if you ask me, but okay. Done. OtterSurf (talk) 08:08, May 26, 2020 (UTC)
          • It's precedent on every status article that ever was :P spookywillowwtalk 00:15, June 3, 2020 (UTC)
  • In the first paragraph of the Biography, "32" should be written out as "thirty-two".
  • "...in his adult life, and was known to have worked" Who knew he had worked with?
  • Similar case here, "which were believed to have been lost in a struggle with one of the Advosze he murdered" Who believed/said they were lost in such a struggle?
    • Omitted and fixed respectively. OtterSurf (talk) 10:34, May 24, 2020 (UTC)
  • The P&T seems to have run-on sentences overall. I also think subjective language such as "apparently", from "...apparently stole his trousers", should be removed.spookywillowwtalk 03:01, May 24, 2020 (UTC)
Anil
  • Preliminaries:
    • Files and templates need to use underscores in place of spaces (eg [[File:Luke_Skywalker.jpg]], not [[File:Luke Skywalker.jpg]]).
    • Multiple poorly-formatted links.
    • The {{Journal}} template should be implemented for issue 11 as well.
    • Aren't those Wanted by Cracken entries sources rather than "appearances"?
    • The italicization and quotations of the real-life "Wanted by Cracken" are inconsistent in the article.
    • Publisher information missing in BTS. TanDivoInsignia-SenateMurders.svg Anıl Şerifoğlu (talk) 21:49, June 13, 2020 (UTC)
Toprawa
  • Does the source explicitly call his hair "orange-red"? Because the infobox image is anything but.
  • Why does Endor's astrographical position or status as a moon need to be mentioned here? Does this contain any relevance to the character? If it doesn't, just say "defeat at the Battle of Endor": "After the Galactic Empire's defeat at the Outer Rim moon of Endor"
  • Two consecutive sentences in the intro begin in the exact same way, which is redundant and poor wording. Please mix it up. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 20:28, September 28, 2020 (UTC)
    • Both done. OtterSurf (talk) 09:51, September 29, 2020 (UTC)
      • If you think changing "After" to "Following" is satisfactory, you're sadly missing the point of this objection. Please reword one of those sentences to avoid the redundant syntax. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 03:11, October 7, 2020 (UTC)

Comments

Senator Jar Jar Binks commemorative drinking cup

  • Nominated by: RattsT (talk) 05:35, July 7, 2020 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: First Legends nom had to be an important one. Drink up, folks.

(2 ACs/3 Users/5 Total)

(Votes required: 1 AC vote(s) required to reach minimum. No additional votes required to pass, please consider reviewing another article.)

Support

  1. Ben sc01t (Hello there) 06:22, July 9, 2020 (UTC)
  2. Wonderful. Now we just need to add this to the Jar Jar page. - - -CIS roundel.svg OOM 224 ༼༽{talk}༼༽ 09:30, July 12, 2020 (UTC)
  3. ACvote.png Imperators II(Talk) 07:18, October 10, 2020 (UTC)
  4. TK-462 (talk) 16:55, 26 November 2020 (UTC)
  5. ACvote.png Ayrehead02 (talk) 10:48, 6 January 2021 (UTC)

Object

Burn it, burn it now
  • Would it be possible to briefly mention the interaction between the cup and Fett in the History's quote in the text? Ben sc01t (Hello there) 07:46, July 8, 2020 (UTC)
    • Mentioned. RattsT (talk) 22:29, July 8, 2020 (UTC)
OOM
  • Intro-exclusive info: there's no mention of Jar Jar being "famous" in the article body.
  • Also regarding the intro, it should be explicitly stated that Melvin was bounty hunting Jar Jar. Currently, with "searching" and "Confusing the souvenir with the famous Gungan, Fett seized the item, content that he had captured his bounty," it's not very clear that Jar Jar was Melvin's quarry, at least until the very end. - - -CIS roundel.svg OOM 224 ༼༽{talk}༼༽ 11:38, July 11, 2020 (UTC)
    • Addressed both. "Famous" probably wasn't the right wording anyway. Changed to "well-known," which is closer to the "recognizable" used in the body. RattsT (talk) 06:16, July 12, 2020 (UTC)
Imp
  • Please make sure the title of both the story and the issue are formatted consistently throughout the article, in all sections and templates.
  • Per ample recent precedent, please change the Dark Horse citation to the equivalent Marvel Comics one.
  • There's no need for ref 4, please just make do with ref 1 for that, since the latter also links to the issue. Imperators II(Talk) 18:47, October 1, 2020 (UTC)
    • All objections addressed. RattsT (talk) 11:22, October 4, 2020 (UTC)
  • I'm not seeing any supporting evidence for the article's subject to be extant in the Rebellion era, as the Eras template indicates.
  • The BTS asserting with certainty that the comic is non-canon contradicts what the article's header template says.
  • Please add the approximate creation date of the cup to the infobox.
  • Does the source actually say that Jar Jar's voice was "recognizable"?
  • Does the source actually say that Jar Jar was "well-known"? Imperators II(Talk) 09:18, October 8, 2020 (UTC)
Ayrehead02
  • The Melvin Fett article seems to narrow down the timeframe for the story to before 6 BBY based on Pooja Naberrie becoming senator. If this is accurate this should be included in the article as it can then be placed in the Imperial Era. Ayrehead02 (talk) 12:21, 20 December 2020 (UTC)
    • Currently asking around to verify that date, since the note on Melvin's page doesn't specify how it reached that conclusion. RattsT (talk) 04:07, 22 December 2020 (UTC)
      • After asking some other users, I've been unable to confirm this information anywhere, so I'm going to leave the dating as it is. If I do come across solid evidence of the 6 BBY figure though, I'll change the date. RattsT (talk) 22:10, 23 December 2020 (UTC)
  • You don't actually mention in the body that there's a bounty on Binks, just that Melvin's trying to capture him. Since you do include this info in the intro it'll need to be added. Ayrehead02 (talk) 12:21, 20 December 2020 (UTC)
    • Added. RattsT (talk) 04:07, 22 December 2020 (UTC)
Toprawa
  • For starters, you should upload digital versions of the two comic images being used in this article. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 01:27, 23 December 2020 (UTC)
    • Uploaded new versions. RattsT (talk) 22:59, 23 December 2020 (UTC)
      • You should update both file pages with the appropriate citation template now. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 02:51, 6 January 2021 (UTC)
  • It would be better for the infobox creation field to specify "By 19 BBY"
  • It would be appropriate for the infobox's owners field to specify a "A Jawa"
  • I'd also recommend specifying "Handheld" for the infobox's size field. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 02:51, 6 January 2021 (UTC)
    • All above addressed. RattsT (talk) 00:06, 9 January 2021 (UTC)
  • The tweet used in reference 6 really doesn't support the statement that Kochalka is an "avid Jar Jar Binks fan," nor does the tweet in reference 7 support the details "several strips of his comic autobiography."
  • I think you should just remove the last BTS sentence. It's just repeating the header template without adding any extra context or information. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 02:21, 15 January 2021 (UTC)

Comments

  • The page has been updated with new information after discovering the author's Twitter account and uncovering some BTS details. RattsT (talk) 11:22, October 4, 2020 (UTC)


Sami (Cantrosian)

  • Nominated by: OtterSurf (talk) 09:57, July 22, 2020 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: Missed the last objection, sorry. This kitty is going all the way!

(0 ACs/2 Users/2 Total)

(Votes required: 3 AC vote(s) required to reach minimum. No additional votes required to pass, please consider reviewing another article.)

Support

  1. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 13:34, September 6, 2020 (UTC)
  2. LordMominutiae (talk) 20:27, October 2, 2020 (UTC)

Object

Comments

Sakhet's Noodles

(1 ACs/2 Users/3 Total)

(Votes required: 2 AC vote(s) required to reach minimum. No additional votes required to pass, please consider reviewing another article.)

Support

  1. ACvote.png Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 00:56, 18 January 2021 (UTC)
  2. Looks great! Jedi Order.svg ImpacticForce (Talk) 03:05, 19 January 2021 (UTC)
  3. Great work on your first GAN! Erebus Chronus (talk) 03:30, 19 January 2021 (UTC)

Object

Erebus
  • History paragraph is a huge wall of information. Please split it into two paragraphs. CIS roundel.svg Erebus Chronus (talk) 20:49, October 7, 2020 (UTC)
  • Please remove "canon" from the BTS as there's no Legends counterpart to it. And please add the novel's release date. CIS roundel.svg Erebus Chronus (talk) 20:58, October 7, 2020 (UTC)
    • Done. However, I wasn’t sure if I should put march 3 or march 3rd. JediMasterMacaroni (talk) 21:05, October 7, 2020 (UTC)
      • Move the date to before "novel" and remove "March 3rd". CIS roundel.svg Erebus Chronus (talk) 21:11, October 7, 2020 (UTC)
  • In the Twitter reference note, there's no need to capitalize Heir to the Jedi. Also, please link and italicize it like I just did here. CIS roundel.svg Erebus Chronus (talk) 21:22, October 7, 2020 (UTC)
    • Even though that’s how it was spelled in the original tweet? I can still link and italicize is though. JediMasterMacaroni (talk) 21:25, October 7, 2020 (UTC)
      • This is my mistake, but I forgot that you don't link in tweets, so just remove the link, my apologies. However, the tweet itself doesn't explain how it takes place in 0 ABY, so you'll need to explain using the tweet how it does. CIS roundel.svg Erebus Chronus (talk) 21:41, October 7, 2020 (UTC)
        • I explained it, although it is a pretty lengthy answer. Do you see a grammatically correct way to shorten it? JediMasterMacaroni (talk) 22:15, October 7, 2020 (UTC)
          • Sorry to interject, but including Kevin's tweet seems unnecessary since Luke himself says in HTTJ that he hasn't heard from Obi-Wan since Yavin --Lewisr (talk) 04:07, October 8, 2020 (UTC)
            • Makes sense. I only used it because it was used to reference the timeline on Heir to the Jedi. Should I create a second reference nonetheless? JediMasterMacaroni (talk) 17:19, October 8, 2020 (UTC)
              • You should take out Kevin Hearne's tweet in the reference and say something along the lines of "In Heir to the Jedi, Luke Skywalker states that he has not heard from Obi-Wan Kenobi since the Battle of Yavin. As Skywalker hears from Kenobi in Star Wars 1, Heir to the Jedi must take place before Star Wars 1." CIS roundel.svg Erebus Chronus (talk) 18:25, October 8, 2020 (UTC)
                • I hope you don’t mind it’s pretty much word for word from what you suggested. JediMasterMacaroni (talk) 18:42, October 8, 2020 (UTC)
                • Any other thoughts? JediMasterMacaroni (talk) 23:36, October 8, 2020 (UTC)
                    • That's fine. But it still doesn't explain how it's in 0 ABY. You removed the necessary information that explained how Star Wars 1 was set in 0 ABY between Episode IV and Darth Vader 4 per the Atlas, and then HTTJ being between. CIS roundel.svg Erebus Chronus (talk) 23:54, October 8, 2020 (UTC)
OOM
  • Since the subject has only appeared once, "first appeared" should be changed to "appeared."
    • Done.
  • There are three redirect links in the article. To find redirects, they could be made to display in orange instead of the standard blue in "Gadgets" in "My preferences," which could be accessed in the dropdown by your profile picture on the top-right corner.
  • A subject matter should not be linked to in the quote templates if a link for it already exists in the article body.
    • Done.JediMasterMacaroni (talk) 00:02, October 8, 2020 (UTC)
      • Please check again. - - -OOM 224 ༼༽{talk}༼༽ 03:50, October 8, 2020 (UTC)
        • I can’t believe I forgot about one of my favorites, admiral ackbar. JediMasterMacaroni (talk) 04:50, October 8, 2020 (UTC)
          • I meant that per the Layout Guide, "Do not use links within a quote, unless it is the only mention in the article of a certain subject," the links in the quote template should be removed since the subjects are already linked to in the article body. Please add the links in the article body back, and remove links from the quote templates. - - -OOM 224 ༼༽{talk}༼༽ 05:26, October 8, 2020 (UTC)
            • I think I get it now, but I’ve already said done a couple times incorrectly, so I’ll just see if you cross it out or not. JediMasterMacaroni (talk) 17:23, October 8, 2020 (UTC)
  • References should be placed after punctuation marks, with the exception of dashes.
    • Done.
  • Could a relevent image be added to the article? - - -OOM 224 ༼༽{talk}༼༽ 20:52, October 7, 2020 (UTC)
  • The intro says it was a noodle vendor, yet this information and the accompanying links do not appear in the article body. Same for the Rebel Alliance Intelligence Service.
    • I added noodle vendor, although I don’t think rebel alliance intelligence service was ever the right link to use. JediMasterMacaroni (talk) 18:28, October 12, 2020 (UTC)
  • Similarly, Kupohan Spynet is infobox-exclusive information. Everything mentioned in the intro and the infobox should be included in the article body.
  • Images should be structured in the following format: [[File:File-name.png|thumb|left/right|size|caption]] Also, for the image size formatting, "000px" should be used as opposed to "000x000px"
    • I’m assuming that you only crossed out half of that because the size was before left/right. That is fixed now.JediMasterMacaroni (talk) 18:01, October 8, 2020 (UTC)
  • (Reviewing note) Spaces in file names should be replaced with an underscore. I have fixed this for you. - - -OOM 224 ༼༽{talk}༼༽ 05:26, October 8, 2020 (UTC)
  • Drusil Bephorin is intro exclusive.
  • How does Lodos district plaza fit into this? According to that article, the noodle vendor is located there. If that is correct, please adjust/rewrite article accordingly. - - -OOM 224 ༼༽{talk}༼༽ 18:16, October 8, 2020 (UTC)
    • Added that the hut is located in the plaza.
Tomotron
Zed
  • Before this nomination is taken down for being slightly over the word limit, I'd like to add that I think there is some extraneous information that can be cut down on. For example, the last paragraph of the History contains the conversation between Kelen and Skywalker that is not really relevant to the noodle establishment. Zed42 (talk) 09:17, October 11, 2020 (UTC)
    • After that, by my count it is at 998. Any other extraneous information you noticed?JediMasterMacaroni (talk) 02:55, October 12, 2020 (UTC)
      • Between this and changes from other objections, it does appear to be better, though there are still other instances of play-by-play. For example: "The third Kupohan who worked at the hut took the order and informed them to take their receipt, which had the number eighty-nine written on it, indicating their order number. Skywalker and Kelen were also informed to pick up there food at the window around the corner. Their receipt also had in writing, "Return at 0900 tomorrow." Kelen noted that it was unlikely that the hut would be selling noodles at such an early time." This can be written in a more concise manner. Zed42 (talk) 23:50, 22 October 2020 (UTC)
        • Cut it down/ JediMasterMacaroni Admiral Ackbar RH.png(Conversation) 14:50, 23 October 2020 (UTC)
          • Apologies on not getting back to this sooner. That's better, but I feel that it can be cut a little further. "The receipt had the number eighty-nine written on it, indicating their order number, and it also had in writing, "Return at 0900 tomorrow."" I don't think this much detail is necessary. You can just describe them receiving their order number and the message informing them to return rather than writing the exact wording of the message. Zed42 (talk) 10:36, 22 December 2020 (UTC)
  • The date note currently implies that the novel's events could be set between 0 BBY and 0 ABY. To clarify this, you should establish that Yavin marks the end of 0 BBY.
  • The Lodos district should be mentioned in the Description.
  • "The third one would take orders from customers and the other would prepare and box the food…" It is unclear who "the other" refers to here.
  • First paragraph of the History section: You should detail the rebels being sent on their mission before mentioning their arrival at the store. Zed42 (talk) 10:36, 22 December 2020 (UTC)
    • All above objections addressed. JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Conversation) 03:25, 23 December 2020 (UTC)
      • I've just revised the date note, since mentioning Episode IV wasn't necessary. Zed42 (talk) 09:39, 24 December 2020 (UTC)
  • Bephorin's occupation as a cryptologist is exclusive to the intro and should be mentioned in the body.
  • Similarly, Bephorin needing to be rescued from the Galactic Empire is also intro-exclusive.
  • You currently mention the rebels collecting their food twice, at the end of the second History paragraph and in the third. I believe the first instance can just be merged into the first sentence of the third paragraph.
  • As Bephorin is already introduced as their target earlier in the section, it doesn't need to be mentioned for a second time in the third paragraph of the History. Zed42 (talk) 09:39, 24 December 2020 (UTC)
Shayanomer
  • The example I provided in the Comments is still present in the article. The article should be about what happened inside the noodle hut and the noodle hut only. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 20:09, October 16, 2020 (UTC)
    • Removed a chunk about the prelude to the mission to denon, but two questions remain regarding relevancy to the article: I think a sentence about why they were there is good to have for the history paragraph, and I was also wondering if the part of the delivery runt that occurred the following morning should be kept, as it is official Sakhet’s noodles business but occurs off the property. Tell me your thoughts. JediMasterMacaroni (Talk) 21:11, October 16, 2020 (UTC)
      • For the first point, I would go even further and remove the info about how they got to Denon. Just briefly mention how and why they entered Sakhet's in the first place. For your second point, if the article was about an organization, then the info about the delivery would be relevant to keep. But as it stands, the article is about a location, so you should only talk about what happened in and around the location. For the delivery part, just mention that they left the establishment for whatever reason. If you want examples for how you should write a location article, see other Good articles such as The Wooden Wookiee and Nikto hideout. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 11:03, October 17, 2020 (UTC)
        • Updated. I tried to give some background on the delivery run while keeping the information only within the location itself. JediMasterMacaroni Admiral Ackbar RH.png(Conversation) 03:12, October 18, 2020 (UTC)
          • Thats a lot better. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 19:34, October 18, 2020 (UTC)
            • Since the infobox was changed to a store, should the delivery run be put back?
  • The first paragraph of Description is massive, please cut it down into two paragraphs. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 20:10, October 16, 2020 (UTC)
    • Split it between physical description and food ordering protocol, which I think is relevant to keep.
  • {{Store}} would be a better infobox than {{Structure}} here, since this is a vendor.
    • Didn’t know that existed. I agree that it is better.
  • Context missing for Sakhet (in Description), Skywalker, Kelen, and Bephorin.
    • Still missing for Skywalker, Kelen, and Bephorin. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 06:06, October 19, 2020 (UTC)
  • In History, the reasoning for Skywalker and Kelen's visit should be made clear when you first mention them.
  • "Sakhet's Noodles owned a delivery speeder that smelled of cooking oil and was used to deliver the catering orders, even in the morning, as the people of Denon ate at all hours of the day. The speeder had the words "Sakhet's Noodles" written on it. Sakhet would deliver the noodles at the client's doorstep." I don't see the relevance of this information to the article. This can go into another page.
  • From reading that excerpt, it sounds like Sakhet's delivery speeder should get its own article.
    • I shall do that. Since the speeder belongs to the noodle hut, I think it should be called Sakhet's Noodles' delivery speeder instead of Sakhet’s delivery speeder, but if that is incorrect please tell me.
      • The description can still go into that article instead of this one. Here, just briefly mention that they used the vehicle to make deliveries. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 06:06, October 19, 2020 (UTC)
        • I did that.
          • It's still in this article. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 11:08, October 21, 2020 (UTC)
            • I think I fixed it.
  • "In order to ask for Sakhet's help, Skywalker and Kelen were required to order Corellian buckwheat noodles with rancor sauce, which the both of them found unappetizing." Dangling participle here.
    • Simplified the sentence.
  • "After they received their food, Sakhet took them on a delivery run during which Skywalker and Kelen gathered information that would help them formulate a plan to rescue Bephorin." The bold part is intro-exclusive information.
    • That was added prior to the part in History about the delivery run being cut down. Should it be left in or no?
      • I'd say make a brief mention of it in the article overall. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 06:06, October 19, 2020 (UTC)
        • Briefly mentioned.
  • Can you make the image caption more specific to the article rather than just a mention of Denon?
    • Not sure what you mean. What are you thinking?
      • If you use the image I suggested below, "Skywalker and Kelen visited Sakhet's Noodles in search of etc. etc." Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 06:06, October 19, 2020 (UTC)
  • We also have an image of Kelen and Skywalker together. I think it would be beneficial to use this image instead of the current one since it's more relevant to the article. If you are going to add it, then I would upload a cropped version separately where the two characters are the focus.
    • Do you think that’s better even though it isn’t on denon?
      • It doesn't have to be. The image illustrates the two characters that the article talks about in History. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 06:06, October 19, 2020 (UTC)
        • You still need to upload a cropped version separately and use that for this article. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 11:08, October 21, 2020 (UTC)
          • Uploaded cropped version.
            • The image you uploaded is a little blurry, and does not match the file extension of the file I linked above. Also it looks like you upscaled the image, which probably contributed to the blurriness. How did you crop the image? Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 16:18, October 21, 2020 (UTC)
  • General underlinking throughout the article (Noodle, Restaurant, Kupohan, Time to name a few). Links have to be repeated between the infobox, introduction, reference notes, and main body. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 19:28, October 18, 2020 (UTC)
    • Didn’t realize I needed to repeat between intro and body. I think I fixed them all. JediMasterMacaroni Admiral Ackbar RH.png(Conversation) 02:12, October 19, 2020 (UTC)
      • There were a few more you missed. Be careful of this in future nominations. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 06:06, October 19, 2020 (UTC)
  • "The Kupohan who took the order gave no sign of it being unusual aside from a small twitch of the primary and basal ears." Does the novel clarify which Kupohan this is? The Description says there were at least three, otherwise this one would count as a fourth. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 06:06, October 19, 2020 (UTC)
Toprawa
  • I'm going to recommend the removal of the "Description" section image. It's a boring picture of a dot on a map that doesn't add any extra contextual understanding or significance to the article. Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 00:52, 18 January 2021 (UTC)

Comments

  • Plaza had been linked to the disambiguation page, so I created a new page with a conjectural title: Lodos district plaza. JediMasterMacaroni (talk) 21:29, October 7, 2020 (UTC)
  • Per nomination rule number 3 under How to review, you, the nominator, are not allowed to strike the objections; it's the responsibility of the objector, so please refrain from doing so from here on out. CIS roundel.svg Erebus Chronus (talk) 21:49, October 7, 2020 (UTC)
  • Should order 89 be listed as order 89 or order eighty-nine? JediMasterMacaroni (talk) 23:27, October 7, 2020 (UTC)
  • Sakhet's Noodles is currently over the 1000 word limit for good articles and will need to be taken down or changed to a featured article nomination. —Tomotron Revanchist Sith.svg (Star Forge) 23:54, October 8, 2020 (UTC)
    • I was confused by this in the instructions. Do I try to make it shorter or no? JediMasterMacaroni (talk) 23:57, October 9, 2020 (UTC)
      • Rule 14 states the article is not to be deliberately shortened, if it approaches the limit. —Tomotron Revanchist Sith.svg (Star Forge) 02:23, October 10, 2020 (UTC)
        • You will have to ask a member of the AgriCorps reviewing board to take the nomination down as the article is above the word limit for a Good article nomination. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 08:16, October 10, 2020 (UTC)
          • I took out a bit per objection from zed42. Does that count as deliberately shortening it? By my count it is now at 998. JediMasterMacaroni (talk) 02:50, October 12, 2020 (UTC)
            • Do I still need to ask someone to take it down? If so, who? JediMasterMacaroni (talk) 16:36, October 13, 2020 (UTC)
              • After thinking about it, I'd say you should look over the article and try to eliminate any details that fall into "play-by-play" or don't relate to the establishment directly. For example, the first paragraph alone contains a lot of unnecessary fluff about what Luke and Kelen did before they entered Sakhet's. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 18:34, October 13, 2020 (UTC)
  • I wanted to let you know that I will not be able to edit on saturday or Sunday because of the Jewish holiday. I will try to make up for lost time on Monday. JediMasterMacaroni (talk) 12:56, October 9, 2020 (UTC)
  • As of right now there are no objections. Is there a step that I am supposed to take at this point? JediMasterMacaroni Admiral Ackbar RH.png(Conversation) 23:38, 22 October 2020 (UTC)
    • As long as there are no outstanding objections, the nomination is safe from being taken down. You'll just have to wait until more objections arise or people support the nomination. Zed42 (talk) 23:50, 22 October 2020 (UTC)


Chief gunnery officer/Legends (Redux review)

  • Redux comments: Reduxed at Meeting 133.
  • Date added: October 11, 2020

(+0)

Support

Object

Imp
  • My October objection from here has still not been addressed. Imperators II(Talk) 15:42, 21 December 2020 (UTC)
    • Have changed it to just a single quote. Hanzo Hasashi (talk) 23:02, 21 December 2020 (UTC)

Comments

Hem Dazon

  • Nominated by: Ayrehead02 (talk) 10:15, October 13, 2020 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: Felt like a break from Galaxy's Edge for some old school cantina goodness

(0 ACs/3 Users/3 Total)

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Support

  1. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 18:24, October 13, 2020 (UTC)
  2. LordMominutiae (talk) 01:21, October 17, 2020 (UTC)
  3. My vote is redundant, but I'll be polite :P Zed42 (talk) 23:53, October 20, 2020 (UTC)

Object

Zed
  • P&T mentions his skin color twice.
  • The long list of authors for Absolutely Everything You Need to Know can be removed. Zed42 (talk) 10:43, October 13, 2020 (UTC)
  • His gender should be explicitly mentioned somewhere in the body. Zed42 (talk) 18:13, October 13, 2020 (UTC)

Comments

Wyloff sector

(2 ACs/2 Users/4 Total)

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Support

  1. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 08:37, 28 November 2020 (UTC)
  2. Ben sc01t (Hello there) 08:46, 16 December 2020 (UTC)
  3. ACvote.png Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 18:47, 17 January 2021 (UTC)
  4. ACvote.png Ayrehead02 (talk) 11:03, 20 January 2021 (UTC)

Object

Freed fanboy
  • "The killed man's son" comes across messy to me. I would recommend something like "Ilo Jev, the son of the executed personality," Ben sc01t (Hello there) 08:35, 16 December 2020 (UTC)

Comments

  • Hi, everything looks good but I'm not really convinced by the infobox's picture.Hk 47 (talk) 10:03, 7 November 2020 (UTC)
    • Added a comment that should explain the situation. Imperators II(Talk) 10:12, 7 November 2020 (UTC)
      • Thank you.Hk 47 (talk) 10:31, 7 November 2020 (UTC)


Jubba bird

  • Nominated by: Ayrehead02 (talk) 16:26, 17 November 2020 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: Really thought this might show up in FACPOV, but still got plenty of good info from Nexus of Power

(0 ACs/2 Users/2 Total)

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Support

  1. LordMominutiae (talk) 17:03, 17 November 2020 (UTC)
  2. OOM 224 ༼༽{talk}༼༽ 12:28, 28 November 2020 (UTC)

Object

Shayanomer
  • Please check if the article requires an update from the Scrap Metal card. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 06:42, 27 November 2020 (UTC)
    • Updated, thanks for catching the source! Ayrehead02 (talk) 09:01, 27 November 2020 (UTC)
OOM

Comments

Altora

  • Nominated by: Imperators II(Talk) 13:22, 23 November 2020 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: A CA that grew too large.

(1 ACs/2 Users/3 Total)

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Support

  1. LordMominutiae (talk) 02:33, 13 December 2020 (UTC)
  2. Fan26 (Talk) 15:05, 13 December 2020 (UTC)
  3. ACvote.png Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 00:15, 18 January 2021 (UTC)

Object

Comments

Unidentified planet (The West Fissure)

(0 ACs/2 Users/2 Total)

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Support

  1. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 13:12, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
  2. Ben sc01t (Hello there) 14:04, 17 December 2020 (UTC)

Object

Braha'tok enthusiast
  • To put it into perspective, you used "planet" in the intro and body 23 times and incorporated the synonym "world" twice. Can there be more of a mix between the two? Ben sc01t (Hello there) 16:20, 16 December 2020 (UTC)
    • I've made sure that the term "world" is used at least once per paragraph, more or less. Imperators II(Talk) 17:27, 16 December 2020 (UTC)

Comments

Vuchelle

(1 ACs/2 Users/3 Total)

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Support

  1. Fan26 (Talk) 16:49, 18 December 2020 (UTC)
  2. LordMominutiae (talk) 20:16, 20 December 2020 (UTC)
  3. ACvote.png Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 17:54, 15 January 2021 (UTC)

Object

Comments

Civé Rashon/Legends

  • Nominated by: Hanzo Hasashi (talk) 21:07, 13 December 2020 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: I guess at this point no reason to not nominate.

(0 ACs/2 Users/2 Total)

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Support

  1. LordMominutiae (talk) 21:54, 20 December 2020 (UTC)
  2. OOM 224 ༼༽{talk}༼༽ 10:58, 15 January 2021 (UTC)

Object

Shayanomer
  • Please clean up the image clump near the BTS. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 09:05, 16 December 2020 (UTC)
    • Done. Hanzo Hasashi (talk) 12:59, 16 December 2020 (UTC)
      • It looks like the TIE image needs to go as well. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 13:03, 16 December 2020 (UTC)
        • Removed too. Hanzo Hasashi (talk) 13:12, 16 December 2020 (UTC)
          • Looks a lot better now. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 13:14, 16 December 2020 (UTC)
            • Can you try keeping the TIE fighter image from the card game, maybe with a smaller size. Best, Hk 47 (talk) 12:10, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
              • There's no space for it, which is why I asked for its removal. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 13:15, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
  • Bespin being a "planet" needs a separate reference.
  • Date for the Battle of Yavin. It's also better to establish it as being part of the Civil War rather than mentioning that conflict later.
  • Paragraph break for Galaxies info in BTS.
  • Substitute repeated instances of "Cive Rashon" in that paragraph with "the character" since there are too many instances of the former. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 13:29, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
    • Have responded to all. Note that with the Battle of Yavin, in the past mentioning the 0 BBY date was literally removed from articles because it was thought that 0 BBY was redundant for Battle of Yavin, but added back nonetheless. Also when I introduced the article talking about Cive Rashon in Galactic Civil War, I feel that both the Battles of Yavin and Endor are already established from that prose as conflicts in that war, rather than the need to separately establish that. Hanzo Hasashi (talk) 16:10, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
  • You need to make a new category for Obsidian Squadron members and add it to this article. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 18:04, 14 January 2021 (UTC)
OOM
  • There are duplicate links in the article body.
  • With some rewording, the two sentences mentioning the Battles of Yavin and Endor can have their separate date notes be replaced by one simple reference for The New Essential Chronology.
  • I don't think "On at least one occasion" is necessary in the equipment section.
  • "The player then received a collection icon which added up to award a badge if they succeeded in destroying all ten of the elite Imperial pilots." This is unnecessary information on game mechanics, though I see that the next paragraph mentions Rashon being depicted on a collection icon. That information can be moved up to replace the first paragraph's sentence about collection icons. - - -OOM 224 ༼༽{talk}༼༽ 18:11, 14 January 2021 (UTC)

Comments

  • I corrected the SWG part. Hk 47 (talk) 21:27, 13 December 2020 (UTC)
  • From the information in the CCG or in the CSWE, is there any possible retcon with the TIEs seen in episode V? Hk 47 (talk) 19:31, 16 December 2020 (UTC)
    • If you're asking about if she's the pilot of one of the film TIE fighters, impossible to tell since the card image isn't a film shot. As for the CSWE, if talking about the fact that Obsidian Squadron were said to be the TIE fighters pursuing the Falcon in that source, again not just is Cive's TIE impossible to identify as in the film, but we don't even know if she was even in Obsidian Squadron at the time. Hanzo Hasashi (talk) 01:38, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
      • Ok thank you.Hk 47 (talk) 11:56, 17 December 2020 (UTC)
  • Not an objection, but a suggestion. I think there's room to put this image at the start of the Bigraphy section. - JMAS Jolly Trooper.png Hey, it's me! 23:21, 16 January 2021 (UTC)


Lothalian citizen assistance office

  • Nominated by: ImpacticForce Jedi Order.svg (Talk) 17:48, 18 December 2020 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments:
    • About 340 words.

(0 ACs/0 Users/0 Total)

(Votes required: 3 AC vote(s) required to reach minimum. Additional 2 user or 2 AC votes required to pass.)

Support

Object

Shayanomer
  • Links have to be repeated between the infobox, intro, and main body. Please ensure the main body is fully linked.
    • Repeated the links from intro in the main body. ImpacticForce Jedi Order.svg (Talk) 18:11, 18 December 2020 (UTC)
  • The article has a Conjecture template, yet the article proper treats the name as if it's the actual title. Please rectify this. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 17:53, 18 December 2020 (UTC)
    • Removed occurrences where the name is used in that way. ImpacticForce Jedi Order.svg (Talk) 18:07, 18 December 2020 (UTC)
      • Still needs to be addressed for the intro. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 18:31, 18 December 2020 (UTC)
        • I removed the full name, but it still feels off. Any suggestions on how to write it within the intro? ImpacticForce Jedi Order.svg (Talk) 18:53, 18 December 2020 (UTC)
          • I have reworded the intro, please let me know if you are satisfied with this change. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 19:16, 18 December 2020 (UTC)
            • Looks good to me. As for the "instalment" vs "installment", "installment" is the American spelling and should be used over the other spelling, Right? ImpacticForce Jedi Order.svg (Talk) 19:19, 18 December 2020 (UTC)
  • People from Lothal are called "Lothalites," and as such any instances of "Lothalian citizens" should be modified.
  • Coruscant, Lothal, and Bartanish Four Sector (where is this one located?) need context.
    • I added context to Lothal and Coruscant. The Bartanish Four Sector has very little location information in the book, aside from the fact that its closer to the Federal District. ImpacticForce Jedi Order.svg (Talk) 18:57, 18 December 2020 (UTC)
      • Still missing in the intro and for Lothal. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 19:16, 18 December 2020 (UTC)
        • Aadded context in the Intro. What extra context is needed for Lothal? ImpacticForce Jedi Order.svg (Talk) 19:41, 18 December 2020 (UTC)
  • In formal writing, you refer to characters by their last names, not the first.
  • Category:Offices should be added. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 18:31, 18 December 2020 (UTC)
  • Can you modify the opening quote's description so that it connects to the subject of the article better?
  • An image of Renking from the comic can be added to the article.
  • From reading the novel, it looks there should be a general article for "citizen assistance office," and thus should be linked in this article. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 19:16, 18 December 2020 (UTC)
    • Linked, but I'll have to create the page. I'll update once its done. ImpacticForce Jedi Order.svg (Talk) 19:52, 18 December 2020 (UTC)
  • Please check these sources for a mention of the subject. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 06:32, 19 December 2020 (UTC)
    • Theres no mention of the office anywhere in the Rebels episodes or the junior novel. I also checked the other Thrawn books, and it isnt mentioned there either. ImpacticForce Jedi Order.svg (Talk) 16:40, 19 December 2020 (UTC)
      • Those are not the sources I asked you to check. I linked a specific section of the article that contained the sources to be investigated. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 16:44, 19 December 2020 (UTC)
        • Ah! Sorry! My computer cut those off the screen. I'll check them now. ImpacticForce Jedi Order.svg (Talk) 16:47, 19 December 2020 (UTC)
        • The women of the galaxy book mentions that she works for a senator on coruscant. Would that count as an indirect mention? I do not own the Ultimate Star Wars book, so I am unable to check that one. ImpacticForce Jedi Order.svg (Talk) 16:58, 19 December 2020 (UTC)
          • For Women of the Galaxy, not really. As for Ultimate Star Wars, one of the requirements for a nomination is a comprehensive list of sources, so you need to find someone who can check the book for you. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 17:02, 19 December 2020 (UTC)
            • Okay. sounds good. I'll consult the discord. In the meantime, is there anything else I can improve? ImpacticForce Jedi Order.svg (Talk) 17:38, 19 December 2020 (UTC)
            • Thanks to the help of Lewisr, I can say that the Ultimate Star Wars mentions an office, but doesn't specify whether it means this one or the one in Bartanish 4. It just says she accepted a job in the office, but was later fired. Should I put it down as a mention? ImpacticForce Jedi Order.svg (Talk) 18:26, 19 December 2020 (UTC)
              • That isn't specific enough, so no. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 18:35, 19 December 2020 (UTC)
Macaroni
  • Audiobook for Thrawn will need to be added, and the Thrawn comic adaptation should be checked.
    • Do you mind if I chip in? The comic also has a "mention only", no new info.--Dionne Jinn (Something to say?) 18:23, 18 December 2020 (UTC)
    • I added the audiobook. In the comic, the office is mentioned in a flashback, but never appears. What template(s) should be used in that situation? ImpacticForce Jedi Order.svg (Talk) 18:24, 18 December 2020 (UTC)
      • You can use {{Mo}} next to {{Flash}}. Additionally, audiobooks should be formatted like this: [[Thrawn (audiobook)|''Thrawn'' audiobook]]
        • Done. ImpacticForce Jedi Order.svg (Talk) 18:50, 18 December 2020 (UTC)
          • Please use {{1stm}} for the book and audiobook, as they were first mentioned in both simultaneously, like this: (First mentioned, simultaneous with Thrawn audiobook), and vice versa next to the audiobook.
  • Introduction could be expanded.
  • Could a quote be added to the description section? JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Conversation) 18:12, 18 December 2020 (UTC)
  • Some underlinking in the article body.JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Conversation) 19:08, 18 December 2020 (UTC)
    • I added 1 or 2 but I couldn't find any more to add. Any that stand out to you? ImpacticForce Jedi Order.svg (Talk) 20:09, 18 December 2020 (UTC)
    • Added the links you mentioned. ImpacticForce Jedi Order.svg (Talk) 20:16, 18 December 2020 (UTC)

Comments

Should the page be moved to Lothalite assistance office? Jedi Order.svg ImpacticForce (Talk) 16:28, 12 January 2021 (UTC)

  • What's wrong with the current title? Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 12:41, 15 January 2021 (UTC)
    • Since citizens of Lothal are "Lothalites," it may be preferable to move it. It may be fine where it is, though. Jedi Order.svg ImpacticForce (Talk) 18:43, 15 January 2021 (UTC)
      • This one's up to you. Both demonyms are fine in my opinion. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 13:00, 16 January 2021 (UTC)


Lewis

  • Nominated by: Imperators II(Talk) 10:07, 20 December 2020 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: In honor of the one and only.

(1 ACs/2 Users/3 Total)

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Support

  1. I'm assuming his last name secretly begins with an 'r' :P Ben sc01t (Hello there) 11:28, 20 December 2020 (UTC)
  2. I imagine his editing skill is higher than average as well. DwartiiDelver (talk) 16:09, 27 December 2020 (UTC)
  3. ACvote.png Toprawa and Ralltiir (talk) 05:11, 8 January 2021 (UTC)

Object

Comments

Unidentified astromech droid

  • Nominated by: DwartiiDelver (talk) 19:01, 20 December 2020 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: I wonder if R2 took this guy out off-screen?

(1 ACs/2 Users/3 Total)

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Support

  1. ACvote.png MasterFredCommerce Guild.svg(talk) 21:19, 28 December 2020 (UTC)
  2. Good work. - - -OOM 224 ༼༽{talk}༼༽ 21:31, 29 December 2020 (UTC)
  3. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 14:57, 30 December 2020 (UTC)

Object

Shayanomer
  • In Sources, the precedent is to list the parent Databank entries rather than the specific galleries, like Episode Guides. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 19:09, 20 December 2020 (UTC)
    • Got it, thanks. I've updated the page accordingly. DwartiiDelver (talk) 19:17, 20 December 2020 (UTC)
  • Per naming policy, article title should be at "Unidentified astromech droid" and the Legends page currently holding that title should be moved to something else. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 12:17, 30 December 2020 (UTC)
OOM
  • The context for Anakin and Ahsoka discovering the location of the facility in the second paragraph is unnecessary. The article only needs to say that the Jedi traced it down and went there.
    • Better?
      • Better indeed.
  • The fate of the nanny droids as well as the facility should be mentioned in both the intro and the body.
    • Added.
  • Image could be enlarged.
    • Enlarged.
  • If a complete sentence, the image caption should have a full stop at the end.
    • Got it, added.
  • An image category should be created for the droid.
    • Created and linked.
  • (Reviewing note) Per Wookieepedia:Manual of Style/Proper use of the dash, an en dash should be used when hyphenating word combinations such as "dark side." Also, when linking to another subject, only the subject in question should be linked.
    • Got it.
  • I'm not sure about the linking of Project Harvester to the mention of Sidious wielding an army of dark siders. Isn't the project just about kidnapping children for that purpose? - - -OOM 224 ༼༽{talk}༼༽ 21:55, 28 December 2020 (UTC)
    • Yeah, I wasn't entirely sure about that either. Think I should link it to "kidnap" earlier in that sentence instead, or just drop the link entirely? DwartiiDelver (talk) 23:25, 28 December 2020 (UTC)
      • Kidnap works.
        • Done.
  • The nanny droids' efforts shouldn't be described as 'best' since it's subjective.
    • Removed.
  • The description for the second quote could use some context, like stating who Sidious is speaking to. - - -OOM 224 ༼༽{talk}༼༽ 21:12, 29 December 2020 (UTC)

Comments

Millennial Celebration Invitation

  • Nominated by: DwartiiDelver (talk) 19:02, 20 December 2020 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: At last, another Dwartii-related nomination

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  1. Nice work Fan26 (Talk) 00:29, 11 January 2021 (UTC)
  2. GOod job VergenceScatter (talk) 01:26, 19 January 2021 (UTC)

Object

Macaroni
  • The actual card should be included in ref 2 using {{SWCT}}.
    • Added.
  • Ref 1 is used two consecutive times in Behind the scenes without a seperate ref in between, so the first one can be removed. JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Conversation) 00:29, 29 December 2020 (UTC)

Comments

Jeremoch Colton

  • Nominated by: Ayrehead02 (talk) 22:58, 21 December 2020 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: In memory of the man who gave us Boba

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  1. Very nice! DwartiiDelver (talk) 23:41, 22 December 2020 (UTC)
  2. Objection handled via Discord. JediMasterMacaroniAdmiral Ackbar RH.png(Conversation) 02:09, 27 December 2020 (UTC)

Object

Shayanomer
  • Article title should be at "Colton," per naming policy. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 10:01, 22 December 2020 (UTC)
    • Ah, nice catch. All relevant pages should now be moved and redirects fixed. Ayrehead02 (talk) 11:36, 22 December 2020 (UTC)
Zed
  • Skin color is infobox-exclusive. Zed42 (talk) 11:09, 22 December 2020 (UTC)
DwartiiDelver
  • This is fairly minor, but should the House of Organa be listed before the Galactic Republic in the affiliations section of Colton's infobox? While not status articles, others such as Raymus Antilles and Evaan Verlaine list the House first under affiliations, although I suppose it's worth noting we don't yet know canonically if Colton is actually Alderaanian. DwartiiDelver (talk) 20:45, 22 December 2020 (UTC)
    • General precedent is to order affiliations chronologically and then alphabetically. Given that we don't know the timeframe for either of his affiliations I've gone with alphabetical. Ayrehead02 (talk) 23:32, 22 December 2020 (UTC)

Comments

Ho'Din herbal tea

  • Nominated by: Imperators II(Talk) 20:53, 11 January 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: Rewrote this former CA, reasons for previously delisting it can be seen here.

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  1. Cocaine tea Fan26 (talk) 00:36, 13 January 2021 (UTC)
  2. Zed42 (talk) 21:27, 13 January 2021 (UTC)

Object

Zed
  • Even though it seems obvious that the end of the Battle of Yavin was in 0 ABY, could the "by 0 ABY" date from the infobox be utilized in the article body? Zed42 (talk) 19:44, 13 January 2021 (UTC)

Comments

Altier sector

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  1. Fan26 (Talk) 16:46, 17 January 2021 (UTC)

Object

Comments

Gorin

  • Nominated by: Ayrehead02 (talk) 21:46, 14 January 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: A birthday gift to Tope

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Object

Tommy
  • I think there's more than enough for an Equipment section.
    • Damn not sure how I missed this, added. Ayrehead02 (talk) 18:31, 15 January 2021 (UTC)
  • Have we stopped using Imperial Navy's officer corps in the infobox?
  • Please alphabetise the interlangs.
  • Should Orbital Command be listed in the infobox too? The individual page for that makes it sound like an organisation while here it seems like a position.
    • I believe are article on Orbital Command is probably a misinterpretation. Rebel Files just lists "Orbital Command: Admiral Gorin" on the transmission, which doesn't in anyway suggest to me that it's a group at all but rather a position or title. Ayrehead02 (talk) 18:31, 15 January 2021 (UTC)
  • Is the The Rebel Files bit relevant to this character? Tommy-Macaroni 16:30, 15 January 2021 (UTC)
    • I've reworded the sentence to make it's relevance to Gorin more obvious. Ayrehead02 (talk) 18:31, 15 January 2021 (UTC)
Shayanomer
  • Missing info from the novelization: Gorin positioned his forces above the gate to protect it from rebel attack.
  • Image size can be increased, especially the second one.
  • BTS needs to specify first appearance.
    • There's ample status article precedent of not specifically stating that a film is the first appearance. Ayrehead02 (talk) 18:31, 15 January 2021 (UTC)
  • Simultaneous 1st appearance with film, novelization and audiobook. However, keep the appearance templates next to the film only, so as to follow an example in Ruescott Melshi. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 16:36, 15 January 2021 (UTC)
    • It isn't a simultaneous 1st as he's only mentioned in the novel and audio book. Ayrehead02 (talk) 18:31, 15 January 2021 (UTC)

Comments

Belnar sector

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Yataga sector

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Unidentified freighter (Tatooine)

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Comments

Redeemer

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Shayanomer
  • For starters, the article should follow the precedent set by existing starship GAs. e.g. No manufacturer, reference note for length. Shayanomer Din Djarin's clan.svg (talk) 17:51, 16 January 2021 (UTC)
Editor
  • I feel like "and liberate Ryloth from the Separatist Alliance" is the wrong choice of words, due to Cham Syndulla's role in the Battle of Lessu. So I think something like "leading to the liberation...." would be better. You don't need to mention the Twi'lek resistance. I think change it to something that notes the liberation but doesn't attribute all of it to the Republic.--Editoronthewiki (talk) 20:26, 16 January 2021 (UTC)

Comments

Tayan falcon

  • Nominated by: VergenceScatter (talk) 18:11, 16 January 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments: CAnom that went over the word limit

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Comments

Sprite

  • Nominated by: MasterFredCommerce Guild.svg(talk) 22:25, 17 January 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments:

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Thorgeld system

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Infantry Support Platform

  • Nominated by: CanePlayz (talk) 14:38, 19 January 2021 (UTC)
  • Nomination comments:

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Comments

I might be able to get an image for the characteristics section, but that is a different and complicated affair that has to be solved first. CanePlayz (talk) 14:38, 19 January 2021 (UTC)


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